Carpe Diem
by LadyMisaga
Summary: Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Eventual Roy/Ed
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story is still very much in the works. Originally I was going to wait until it was finished to post it but oh well. I will give a forewarning, this is a story for fun and a challenge I have set for myself to write better so there may be a good deal of time between posts. Constructive Criticism is highly appreciated. Hope you enjoy and happy reading._

Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)  
Pairing: Roy/Ed  
Genre: Drama, Action Adventure  
Series: FMA  
Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)  
Status: Work In Progress  
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**Carpe Diem**

**Prologue**

The constant rocking and stiffness of the seat he currently sat in brought back feelings of familiarity that caused a small smile to curl his lips. The fact that he could feel that stiffness reminded him of all the times his brother had fallen asleep on train rides to all the places they had gone. But even the nostalgic feelings couldn't gouge the loneliness he felt even with his best friend and wife and their daughter right there with him. He missed his brother and it hurt to think back on how distant they had become, how secretive he was and how there seemed to be a wall separating them even when they stood side by side. They used to tell each other everything used to know one another so very well but now Al felt like his brother had become a stranger and that pained him more than he wanted to openly admit. He knew logically that some things were the same and that it was most likely Ed was keeping things from him to protect him but that didn't make it hurt any less that he was not telling him anything.

They had been through so much and why did Ed believe that Al had not had to endure and go down those hard roads with him, that he didn't feel pain in some small way and especially now when he had his body back? When he did get his body back all the memories of their time spent on the road came back to him almost viciously. It was as though now that he had regained his body that he had to pay a heavy, emotional, and agonizingly eye opening price for his time apart from it. In a matter of months he had truly felt what their journey had cost them both. He had always been viewed as mature but now he fully understood why others saw him as wise beyond his years.

It was typical of Ed to carry all the weight on his shoulders but that weight would crush him as surely as the automail would one day. He was accustomed to having Ed at his side all the time and since his return he had accepted that they needed their space and to grow to be independent from each other but that didn't mean that they shouldn't still be close and trust one another. He had gone to Teacher and spent those two years constantly on the road and it wasn't until Ed was suddenly there, found around North Headquarters near the Drachma Mountains that he had ceased his search. Two years of not knowing was probably the cause for his paranoia right after Ed had left on assignment and why he had found himself speaking with Mustang often to ensure that his brother was alright and had not disappeared once again.

It was still obvious to him at every turn and every thought, Ed wasn't there, he wasn't within reach, to talk to, or to just lay eyes on. That left a gap in his life that he wished could be filled with his older brothers' presence. He knew his brother was alive, knew he was on assignment, knew that his brother had to check in every week with his commanding officer and that those responses rotated back to Mustang and his crew and thus back to Al and Winry in Rush Valley but it wasn't really enough. He longed to hear his brothers voice, to see those golden eyes and would actually cherish seeing one of Ed's outbursts just because it would rectify that Ed was there and not somewhere else.

Al was worried about the changes in Ed, how much different were they now? So much had changed about their lives, Al had Winry and Anna and Ed had left Resembool only six months after his return after spending several months in the hospital recovering from whatever it was he had been through. Then he went back to Central where he spent another six months before he left for his two year assignment. He'd visited him in Central at his single apartment but even then there was this rift between them. The 'People's Alchemist' had disappeared for two years and when he returned he was more subdued, calmer, more mature and even more distant than ever.

He remembered the first time his brother had begun to change; Ed was sixteen and their lives were still an everyday struggle as they desperately searched for a way to restore their bodies. His brother had become more withdrawn, more secretive, and there was this permanent cloud hanging over him. It seemed as though he was haunted and he knew such a drastic change resulted in his brothers' encounter with Kimblee in the Drachma Mountains. That was the first time his stubborn sibling had drawn away from them and set off to do things on his own. The consequences for his choice were something he had covered up with time but could not be fully hidden.

It wasn't until all the fighting was over and both of them were recovering in the hospital that Al had noticed the scar. A scar from a wound that should have been fatal and was present in alignment with a scar on his lower back was there on his stomach on the lower left side. He knew his older brothers' scars from grazes, cuts, burns, the automail, but was denied the information on that particular one. He had to resort to research to figure out what could have caused and find out how deadly it was. The knowledge was heart stopping at best; he could have lost his brother and would have never known as such if the choice were left to Ed.

When his elder sibling had miraculously returned the artificial limbs he wore made Winry balk at the sheer simplicity and lacking of modernization in their design. They seemed to only fulfill the barest of necessities and had made the replacement of the automail much more difficult than should the automail have been damaged or the limbs simply removed. The ports had to be redesigned and reinstalled. Another thing that had bothered the younger Elric was that his elder brother had been very adamant that he not be present for the surgery. Pinako and Winry had seen his brothers' scars from his time away and they had told him but why was his brother so . . . defensive towards him of all people?

Ed had spent several months at the North Medical Facility before he had even traveled to Resembool and then six months having the automail reinstalled. Then his brother had gone to Central where he was told to take six months leave and was reinstated in the military with a promotion to add to it. No one could figure out why he would remain in the military after all the complaining and times he had said he despised being a dog of the military.

Al snapped out of his thoughts at the yawn emitted from his daughter, her bright blue eyes were very much Winrys' and her dark blond hair was his own. She looked so much like his mom that he couldn't help but smile as she rubbed her eyes tiredly. The speaker announced they had arrived in Central while the whistle blew loudly breaking the tired reverie of the passengers. Winry stood and stretched her arms over her head before picking Anna up with a laugh that was met with the helplessly happy laughter of the two year old and Al felt warmth run through him and his heart swelled with happiness.

He had changed and grown and no longer wore an outfit similar to Ed's taking to brown slacks and a white button down with a khaki coat instead. Winry dressed a little more sophisticated now choosing to wear a lose pair of navy pants with a green pullover shirt. She'd given up skirts and tank tops as her business grew and then after giving birth to Marianna she chose comfort over looks. It suited her really and they were both a bit surprised when Anna decided she wanted to wear dresses and have her long hair worn in a braid declaring that Uncle Ed always used to wear it that way and she would too until she was taller than Ed's now 5'9". Her hair had only managed to grow to the middle of her back. She had yet to actually meet Ed but she was shown all kinds of pictures and always managed to get to talk to him on the phone when he called. It was late fall and the weather in Central required a bit more attire to keep warm than what Rush Valley or Resembool did.

Winry had already put on her thicker coat and had done the same for Anna who was wearing thick, white stockings to keep her legs warm beneath her long sleeved, light blue, ribboned dress that one of the mothers' in Rush Valley had made for her. He shrugged his thicker, khaki coat on as Winry set to fastening the buttons on her own navy blue coat. Their coats were made of wool and they had bought those years ago for their trips to Central.

Anna motioned to Al as he stood and Al took her with a bright, warm smile and her giggling made his heart swell with pride and a fierce feeling of devotion. He learned when his daughter was born that Ed wasn't the only person he could be so tied to and dedicated to, it was different with his daughter than it was with Ed or Winry. It was all consuming and he understood Mr. Hues now, why he was so protective and proud and would always show everyone pictures of Elysia. He twirled her in the air making her laugh before hugging her close and reaching up to grab his suitcase in the hamper above the seats. Winry had already grabbed her bag and the small white suitcase that had Anna's things in it. He followed her off the train and through the station where they were greeted by Havoc waiting for them with a car.

Havoc was wearing the standard issue wool jacket that marked him as a soldier over his uniform and that reminded him that he would get to see his brother in uniform when he returned seeing as how Ed no longer had any excuses not to wear it. He waved and smiled and Al was so glad to see him standing on his own legs again, he grinned and waved back as they headed towards him. "Hi Al, Miss Winry, Marianna, see you're dressed for the worsening weather here," Anna smiled in greeting as did Winry as they stood before him.

"Indeed, the winters' here are terrible. Ed seems to have great timing to return," Winry commented as she set her bag and the suitcase on the ground.

"That's not really his choice Winry," Al began as Havoc reached down and took hold of the things Winry had set down. "You didn't have to go to this much trouble for us."

"Not that it isn't appreciated," Winry added with a smile as Havoc set her things in the trunk and held his hand out for Al's things. Al handed him his suitcase with a polite word of thanks then asked, "How have you been Mr. Havoc?"

The older man turned back to them with a grin after he got their things situated in the trunk and closed it, "Just Havoc is fine Al, the boss calls me that. I have been doing well and this is truly the highlight of my day. Chief wanted to make sure you three were well taken care of, boss would ring his neck if he ignored the fact that you were in Central." He motioned for them to get in the car moving to open the door for Winry. Al handed Marianna over to his wife once she had climbed in the backseat and then took his seat in the front passenger seat as the Captain climbed into the drivers' seat. Clicks rang out as seat-belts were put on and then keys jingled before the car was started and the Elrics found themselves grateful for the heat in the car.

As they started down the road Winry asked to break the silence, "How is everyone doing?"

Their driver shrugged, "Fine I guess, still the same as ever. How have you three been doing?"

"Really well, business is wonderful and Anna has already started to read on her own."

Anna beamed and Havoc grinned with a knowing smile as he detected the pride in Winry's voice and in Al's smile.

"That's great but not unexpected, she is an Elric after all and I know as well as anyone that has come across you and the boss that Elric's and Rockbell's are something else."

"The chief wanted to have dinner with all of you but said it could wait until tomorrow, I'm sure all of you are tired from the trip."

As a small silence fell over the group the rest of the way the Amestrian officer snapped his fingers as though a sudden thought has come to him, "Chief wanted me to tell you guys that the boss would be back the morning after tomorrow. We just got the telegram today that he sent from Xing."

Anna yawned to show that indeed they were and Havoc just grinned and turned at the next street heading for a familiar, civilian hotel next to the military hotel Ed and Al had often stayed at. Havoc went so far as to actually pay for their room which he refused to let Al or Winry protest saying it was orders. Once their bags were taken to their rooms the younger of the Elric brothers followed his escort downstairs and stopped him from leaving just outside the hotel.

"Captain, I know it s against regulations and all that-"

His excuse was waved off easily, "Al, he wasn't seriously injured, some bumps and bruises. Though he was adamant about walking that desert which is probably why its' taken so long for the boss to get back. Didn't give a reason why though," he finished before fishing out a cigarette from the right pocket of his heavy coat and then digging into his right pants' pocket for his lighter.

"That sounds like brother," was the only reply he could give with only a frown to accompany it.

The older blond chuckled a with a bit of strain that the younger Elric couldn't help but to notice as he clapped him on the shoulder and said with his cigarette held between his teeth, "Hey, he's tough but rumor has it he lived it up in Xing so don't look so depressed about the boss wanting to take a trek through the dessert. You two did that often enough anyway."

Al nodded, "Yeah, I wasn't worried for safety reasons . . . thank you so much for all your help tonight, we all really appreciate it."

Havoc laughed with a bit of embarrassment, "Well thank the chief for the bills being covered, he can afford it better than I can."

With a smile the young alchemist bid the soldier goodnight and headed back to his room. Upon re-entering his room his wife declared she would take their daughter to round up some dinner for the evening. And so left on his own in the room he took it upon himself to unpack their belongings and try to make the room appear more lived in. Tomorrow he would start trying to get to know his brother again and he would hope his time away in Xing somehow helped him grow less distant and guarded. He had a lot of patience but he felt like he had missed his brother for more than the last four years. They would have to go and see Gracia and Elysia sometime while they were in Central, Elysia was ten years old now and it had been over a year since he had seen her and Gracia.

In fact, in just a few short weeks his brothers' birthday would be here as well as Elysia's. It was not much of a happy ending how they had found out that Elysia and Ed shared a birthday considering the moods they were both in at the time but now he found he looked forward to the day. They would have to find something to get her and he never could find anything to get Ed. A book was the most obvious choice. He was grateful to be worrying over something so simple like what to buy for upcoming birthdays and that was the discussion through dinner when Anna and Winry returned with pasta and meatballs with bread and lemonade. The small family ate in silence before bathing and changing into sleep attire to settle down for the night.

After a long train ride and many thoughts and emotions circling through his mind all day Alphonse found sleep easily in the security of having his arms around his wife and their daughter curled in between them. With a soft kiss and a whispered goodnight he closed his eyes and hoped that his families dreams as well as his own would be pleasant throughout the night.

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_A/N: This is very much a work in progress and something I came up with while stumped with other stories I have been working on during my lack of internet hiatus. I do however have quite a few chapters of this story finished already so I will add them a week at a time to try and give myself time to move forward with this. Hope it was enjoyable to read and thanks for reading._


	2. Chapter One

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story is written in a different way from my usual and while I was going to wait until I finished it to post it but changed my mind. Hope it's enjoyable._

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed **  
**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure **  
**Series: FMA **  
**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**  
**Status: Work In Progress **

_Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed  


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**Chapter One**

That his day was just as boring as the next would be a mistaken thought, though the usually endless paperwork still appeared on his desk promptly delivered to him by the now Captain Havoc, when he wasn't otherwise running other errands. It was bit irritating that Hawkeye felt the need to train Havoc in how to 'deal with him' as Jean had so eloquently put it. Breda of course had to join in the jibes directed his way and the insults, it was as though the two had decided that in Fullmetal's absence that they should make up for his expected attitude.

Although Ed had him well trained on keeping his temper in check and the two paled in comparison to Elric's taunts, jibes, and all around volatile temperament. But that made his mind wander, as it often did when that particular blond came to mind. There were noticeable changes in his behavior even before his two year, diplomatic assignment that was originally only supposed to be six months. For instance, that temper they all expected was better controlled, sometimes it was barely present at all and that put all of them at unease. Then there was the distance, sure Fullmetal had never been very open or trusting or even friendly really but now there was an entire city block between him and everyone.

He wouldn't give details, he didn't express emotion other than annoyance or anger and those were muted in themselves. He had engaged in social activities often enough but he had found through his men that the young officer was even more tightly lipped under the influence of alcohol. His contract had been reactivated and then Fullmetal had requested that it be renewed for the minimum of a year and now it was renewed once more but the minimum was for five years with a consecutive renewal, mostly that was by the request of the Fuhrer himself, which had Mustang feeling twice surprised that Edward had accepted considering his views on the military.

Then there was that shady and redundant report he gave as to where he was for those two years he seemed to have vanished off the face of the Earth. He stated he was in a country on the other side of Drachma. That made logical sense considering that it was General Olivia Armstrongs' company that had sent word that Fullmetal was alive and presently at their base. While Fullmetal had indeed been interrogated by those in Intelligence to ensure he was still loyal to Amestrius and had not given any information away the higher ups seemed disinterested in knowing what the esteemed state alchemist had been through while away.

General Armstrong had given him a brief summary of what she believed his now ex-subordinate had been through. The good General spent a good amount of time between Central and Drachma; she was in charge of a lot of logistics and legalities in Amestrius now and coincided with Parliament. It was a bit annoying that she outranked him though they were called the same but he was only promoted once to Brigadier General and she was what most in the military referred to as a 'True General' which in turn was one rank below the rank of Fuhrership.

The military was slowly and carefully losing their power over the citizens through her influence and the trust the council and parliament as well as the Fuhrer placed in her. He still didn't get along with her well but he was grateful for her influence in the ruling of what to do with Edward. It seemed that she was able to provide evidence of what had gone on during the 'Promised Day' and that resulted in his team as well as the returned and recovered Fullmetal Alchemist to receive recognition for their efforts, promotions, medals, and a good amount of supporters within the public and the military itself.

It wasn't entirely smooth sailing however; there were still those that despised him and his team because of their climb in the ranks and their influence and power. Of course Olivia had not done all she had for nothing, when she requested that the now low ranking General send Fullmetal to Xing and that no one else would suffice he could not refuse regardless of how much he would wish to. Through the military's eyes arguing with the request would be ignorant as his subordinate had been given more than enough time to recover; one year and four months was actually very lenient to them. There was also the fact that the "People's Alchemist" was the best candidate for the assignment considering his familiarity with the Prince and one could hope his maturity would also mean he had more tact and much better self control right?

Wrong, when would he learn that while Edward might have grown up and changed he was still the Fullmetal Alchemist and thus a magnet for trouble and often wreaked havoc wherever he went? Within the first two weeks he received damage reports and they just continued on until the last few months before he received word that Fullmetal was finally coming home. Now why did he just think that, it wasn't a grand idea to assume that Edward Elric considered Central home, surely either Rush Valley or Resembool, wherever his family happened to be was where he considered his home to be. But the eldest Elric had also chosen to return to Central on his own instead of remaining with his brother and sister-in-law where he could have led a peaceful life.

Mustang let out a sigh and ran his hand through his hair tiredly looking up just as a knock sounded on his door. He told whoever it was to enter and was pleased to see Havoc escorting Alphonse, Anna, and the now Mrs. Elric. He stood and offered a smile to which Al gave him a bright smile and Anna leaped from her mothers' arms and ran across the room towards him in what he noticed was a very steady run. He stepped around his desk just in time to catch a giggling bundle of a two year old. The three were dressed

"Uncle Roy," she said in greeting, Ed wasn't going to like such a title being given to him upon his return. He had yet to see his niece in person and that would be more than enough should he hear his niece calling Mustang Uncle. Mustang kissed her forehead and set her down where Winry immediately grabbed her and carried her over to the ever present couch in his office. Havoc was watching all of this with a smirk from the doorway. Mustang nodded to him to which he turned and left closing the door behind him and Al remained standing until he was asked to have a seat.

"It's good to see the three of you; I hope things have been well. Did you get plenty of rest after your traveling?" He had asked the question merely because he was certain that Edward wouldn't take too kindly to seeing his brother or best friend and niece worn out because they wished to see him. That young man was often a contradiction in that he did not want others to push themselves too hard for his sake but he often did so for everyone else.

Al nodded with an all too knowing smile and beat Winry to speaking up about just that, "You shouldn't have gone to all that trouble General, we could have stayed at a hotel and gotten a cab."

Mustang dismissed that easily with his seemingly rehearsed excuse, "Your brother would not have been pleased to hear that his family was not well taken care of when he knows full well it is within my power to do so. It is truly a pleasure to assist in any way I can, after all Alphonse, I do consider you as much a part of this family as your brother."

Al gave a light blush even though Mustang had said this on countless accounts and Winry gave a bright smile and said politely, "Well thank you General, your generosity is appreciated."

"You're more than welcome; please let me know if you are in need of anything else while you're in Central. Fullmetal should be arriving in Central by tomorrow morning. He was kind enough to leave a message with General Holigan on his traveling progress."

Al nodded with a smile that he truly felt, "Thank you General."

Mustang gave a brief nod, "I'm not the one to tell you of what your brother was up to there even though I received copies of the damage reports-"

There was a loud, firm knock on the door and everyone froze for a moment before Mustang said enters in his calm commanding voice. He got to his feet at the sight of General Holigan who looked a bit flushed and possibly irritated or angry. The General stood at five feet eleven inches, was stocky with broad shoulders and a round stomach that often made people underestimate the man. His glasses always seemed to highlight his small green eyes and the sharp intelligence there often reminded Mustang of his old friend. He made his way to stand before Mustang's desk with a thick report in his hands and a furrowed brow.

"You're ex-subordinate is quite the handful Mustang."

"It's great to see you as well General Holigan."

The General smirked and nodded a short greeting to Al, Winry, and then a soft smile to Anna which eased the tension in the room a bit. The General turned an irritated look to Mustang as he set the report on his desk, "The very last damage report from Lieutenant Colonel Elric. I knew he was a lose cannon but this is absurd. I also received a lengthy letter from Prince Ling explaining the situation that resulted in such destruction."

Mustang nodded and thumbed through the report, it seemed that regardless of how much Edward had grown he was still just as reckless at times as he always was. "I apologize General but I'm sure you were aware of-"

"Don't talk politics with me Mustang; I was well aware of how reckless Fullmetal can be. But this is making me rethink my decision to not have him go through the mandatory training of everyone enlisted, especially considering that he is of age to do so now. The letter that followed this report made me further considers it just so that such training could provide something for the Lieutenant Colonel to fall back on should such events arise during a mission again."

"Such events?"

"I believe there was a momentary reunion with some of those he met beyond Drachma; I was told that Prince Ling himself dealt with them accordingly despite the Lieutenant Colonels' protests."

Mustang did look at the General directly then and could feel the weight of Al and Winry's stares. The General did not look away and reached to tap his finger against the report, "I would appreciate his old commanding officer giving me his thoughts on this report and a professional opinion. I wish to leave Fullmetal to your care until you can provide a bit of advice on how to deal with this situation."

"Yes sir," Mustang said and made to stand and salute but the General waved him off and turned to leave. He gave a true greeting to Al, Winry, and Anna and then he was gone. Mustang ran a hand through his hair and muttered something Al thought sounded like, 'Irritating brat,' under his breath. Al smirked, he couldn't help it, it felt like the Edward returning to them might actually result in truly having him back.

Such thoughts in turn brought him back to the unsettling feeling of the changes in his brother that were inevitable. He knew he shouldn't worry that he and Ed weren't going to be close much like he would never, ever, no matter what, doubt how much his brother loved him but he still pined regardless. There was of course the distance and Ed's choice to renew and then extend his contract with the military after all those years of saying nothing but how he wanted to be rid of it and all that true enlistment entailed. Then there was what the General had just said and that brought on an entire horde of different, scurrying, worrying thoughts.

A reunion? With those Ed had met while in Rousia because he had pried that much out of Mustang at least since Ed wouldn't say more than he was sorry it took him so long to get back. Prince Ling had taken care of them? Why had he needed to, why hadn't Ed? Better yet, the way the General had said that Ling had dealt with them he could conclude that they were put to death, what had they done to warrant such actions?

"Alphonse?"

Al blinked and looked up to see Winry and Mustang watching him with concern and Anna was watching him with her ever present curiosity. She had a bit of Ed in her with her constant curiosity and habit of trying to analyze everything around her but Winry often pointed out that she got that from Al as well. He smiled but didn't feel it lost in the whirling thoughts, "Sorry, I just-was thinking, sorry."

Mustang nodded with a knowing look in his eyes that told Al that Mustang was probably thinking about the many things the General's words implied and he did have that damage report and copies of others as well as Ed's other reports on his mind as well. Al had inquired and Mustang had delivered when asked about Ed's well being but there were still things that no one but Ed could tell them about when it came to what was going on with Ed. Al was patient but he was losing his patience and wanted his brother back.

"It seems Fullmetal fell into a bit of his old ways even if it was justified and he had a bit of assistance in the destruction thanks to the ever exuberant and lively Prince. But from what I've seen Edward was not harmed and should be returning to us safe and unharmed."

Al nodded once more, "Thank you. Um . . . what can you tell us exactly?"

"That your brother has been very active in Xing in many ways. Perhaps we could catch up at dinner tonight, we could visit with Gracia and Elysia for a bit, I owe them a visit at least once a week after all."

Al smiled and truly felt the smile warm him right through this time and saw those smiles reflected back at him from Winry and Anna, "That is a wonderful idea. We should probably get going then; we have a bit of shopping to get done and should call Miss Gracia-"

Mustang waved his hand, "No, that's alright Alphonse. I can alert Gracia to the addition to her dinner quests, she was expectant of you and your family visiting. Edward will of course have to make plans to have dinner with her upon his return and he very well owes a few others some catching up as well."

Winry spoke up as well, "That he does, thank you for everything General."

Al stood after Winry got to her feet with her arms full of Anna, "We'll see you tonight General try not to work too hard."

Mustang gave a soft smile, "Of course, do enjoy your time shopping."

Gracia and Elysia were absolutely thrilled to have not only Uncle Roy but Sister Winry and Al and Anna there to join them for dinner. Gracia had made an apple pie for the occasion, Roy having called her to tell her of the extra quests shortly after Al and his wife and daughter had left his office. It was a joyful, carefree dinner and Gracia insisted that Al and Winry stay with her for the night, mostly because Elysia was thrilled to have Anna for company despite the eight year difference in their ages. Winry didn't have the heart to deny either of the girls anymore than she could deny Gracia the company.

Gracia had a bit of grey hair showing in her bangs and that reminded them all of just how hard it must be to raise her daughter after losing her husband and how big her heart was for all of them. Al and Winry had taken to putting the girls to bed when yawns started to emit from both of them having run around playing after dinner. Elysia had school the next day and Anna was too young to start yet or be up very late. Mustang had work the next day and Ed would be arriving in the early morning hours as well.

But thoughts on Ed had Al, Gracia, Winry, and Mustang staying up in the living room drinking tea Winry had insisted on preparing herself. Apparently growing up with Ed and Al had rubbed off on her and she wanted to repay Gracia for dinner and desert as well as her hospitality. Mustang had already told everyone of Ed's report on his two years spent away from them with everyone worrying and thinking the worst. Now they were discussing what he knew of the last two years Ed had spent in Xing.

Ed had chased down alchemists and chimeras and shut down labs and dealt with politicians and become a personal guard to some said politicians at times and then to Prince Ling himself for the remainder of his time in Xing. He was revered as a hero much as he was here in Amestrius and got along well with the populace and surprisingly enough even the diplomats enjoyed the Fullmetal Alchemists' company. That alone spoke volumes of how much Ed had changed and matured. Gracia seemed to have the same mixed feelings about that as everyone else.

Other than the facts Mustang knew next to nothing other than the tally of damage reports and medical bills sent to Central to regulate. The Emperor himself, a new emperor now that the previous one had passed away who was much younger and possibly only five or so years older than Mustang himself, had decreed to pay parts of the expenses considering that Ed was hurt or damage was done in the name of protecting his country and his people.

Left with no more than that they settled into a silence and Mustang declared that it was time he was going but Al had stopped him as Gracia and Winry headed upstairs to get ready for bed and check on the girls. Al was silent a moment before he asked, "Earlier you said that Ed owed others some catching up, it was obvious he should be polite enough to spend a bit of time with us and all but were you implying anyone else?"

"Astute as usual Alphonse. As we both know, Edward often leaves an impression and his colleagues grow attached to him given they've spent enough time around him to get around his brashness."

Al nodded with a soft almost reminiscent smile as Mustang continued. "He has quite a bit of friends in the military and of course Hawkeye is among them and we both know she will no more take no for an answer than Gracia will. It's merely a matter of concern. When you and I and Miss Winry moved in very quickly to try and find out anything everyone else just waited patiently and will be rising to the occasion this time around."

Al nodded once more, there were things he had noticed about his brothers' interaction with everyone after that day and it was further noticed in the times he'd seen Ed before he'd left for Xing. He wondered how his brother would handle that when he came home.

"I wonder where brother considers home to be," Al mused quietly aloud. Mustang often thought that himself but felt it in an entirely different way.

"I would wager that Edward makes his home where his family and friends are rather than a specific location," even if he wished Ed would just stay where everyone could reach him instead of leaving them here waiting for him to return to them.

"Sorry to have kept you General," Al stood and Mustang followed his example. They shook hands, Al a bit hesitant to do so but then grinned and they bid one another good night with the promise to see one another again. Mustang told Al that Ed was expected to report to H.Q. first thing in the morning and he would send Havoc to collect them to go and retrieve Ed in the morning and then Ed should be receiving a few days leave to rest after that. Al thanked him, walked him to the door, saw him off and then locked the house up and tidied up before heading upstairs for the night. The only reason he was able to sleep at all was out of pure exhaustion and because Winry had told him simply, "Sleep."

* * *

_After thought: This is rather short in comparison to the chapters of any story I have previously written. However, the good news is Ed's PoV next chapter and well Ed is back so yeah. Thanks for reading._


	3. Chapter Two

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story was worked on in spurts but I decided to post it despite originally wanting to wait until I finished this. Hope you enjoy._

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed **  
**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure **  
**Series: FMA **  
**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**  
**Status: Work In Progress **  
**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**

**Chapter Two: Returning Home**

The dawn of a new day was very visible even as the many buildings of Central's inner city came into view. It made some of the buildings a deep red with softer hues of orange and gold but it was the red that made an involuntary shiver race down the young mans' spine occupying one of the many seats on the train. Such a late departure had guaranteed that there would not be that many passengers which was why he had chosen to leave East City so late. Too many people always made him feel too agitated and he would need to be able to control his temper for his reunion.

His hair had grown and it stood out against the black of his state issued overcoat, a thick black trench coat that he'd been given at the same time he was given his uniform. Since he was of age and had grown quite a bit there was no way out of wearing the uniform that marked him as a member of the Amestrian Military. He had chosen to remain in the military so it was an equivalent exchange. He could have gone without the yellow cord or the rank insignia or the medals and ribbons on the uniform but they often worked in his favor.

He ignored the stares from the few families traveling on the train with him, some looked to him with weariness and others with disbelief. Probably because these people had seen the way the soldiers at the station in East City had greeted him, saluted him, called him sir, and all that other military propaganda that he really didn't care much for. He crossed his arms over his chest thankful that he could do so without pulling at old scars after two years of having constant open wounds on nearly every stretch of skin. While it would be really nice to see Al and Winry and meet his niece he wasn't looking forward to the interrogation he was sure to be greeted with.

Gold eyes narrowed as they turned to gaze out the window, Ling had pestered him more than enough and the young prince could give Mustang a run for his money in the manipulation and word game if he really wanted to. He always danced around your questions to him and thus infuriated you and pressed all your buttons until you either admitted something you'd rather not or wanted to strangle him. For the first six months Ed had often been pushed towards the latter but then when he became accustomed and even comfortable around the smarmy, leeching, too fast for his own good, prince he'd slipped too many times.

That prince had figured out more than Ed had not told anyone about his time spent in Rousia and what he'd gone through. What Ed had refused to say the jerk had filled in the blanks and drawn his own conclusions about. But, even though Ling was aggravating as all hell Ed couldn't help but miss his company, not that he would ever admit it, the prince was plenty arrogant enough without him voicing he actually missed him. He let out a sigh and unfolded his arms to run a hand through his bangs.

Things had gone pretty well and in time he'd been able to get past the shit he'd been through. Ling had dragged him off on double dates and introduced him to what most his age were doing. He'd been uncomfortable at first but he got the hang of it and when his name became well known in Xing with its' own reputation attached to the one he had in Amestrius as the 'People's Alchemist' he didn't have to try very hard to get a date. But he'd grown bored of the opposite sex, which he had not expected but the prince seemed all too thrilled about.

Then of course things between them had changed after that, they became a bit more than friends to put it lightly. While Ed had made it clear he wasn't looking for anything permanent, wasn't ready for that yet, he could honestly say that he didn't regret the affair of sorts he and Ling had together. The nervousness he felt made him wish he hadn't finally figured out what and who exactly he wanted though.

The conductors voice came over then announcing their arrival at Central Station. Ed took a deep breath and patiently waited for all the other passengers to exit the compartment before standing and grabbing his travel worn suitcase from the overhead compartment and making his way off the train. His body ached in familiar ways from the long train ride and then his choice of walking across a desert to get back to Amestrius. He'd wanted to clear his head and see the ruins of Xerxes once more.

As he stepped off the train he was grateful for the chilling air that whispered over his skin, thankful the winter was approaching in Central. The winters here were so much different from the winters in Xing or Rousia and that cemented it in his mind where he was. He looked around and felt a bit of relief that he hadn't spotted Al, Winry, nor Mustang at the station. But of course the smell of cigarettes drafted towards him and he turned to see Havoc heading his way with a genuine smile on his face.

Ed returned the smile sincerely as well, he was glad to see Havoc regaining his ability to walk and stand once more, finding out had been horrible and the recovery a blessing. He wondered when he had truly accepted that he was as much a part of Mustangs' team as they considered him to be and also friends to him. Perhaps it had been after his talk with Riza and her telling him about the Massacre of the Ishvalans.

"Heya boss, good to see ya again, everyone s' at the office waiting for ya."

"Nice to see you too, why at the office, I expected them to be here."

Havoc shrugged as Ed walked over to him to follow him out of the station and towards a waiting car. Havoc looked as though he wanted to hug him his grin was so wide but Ed didn't give him the incentive. He was sure Al and Winry would be hugging him more than enough as it was.

"Guess they just decided not to tag along," Havoc answered easily.

Ed shrugged, "Whatever, when are you going to stop smoking those damn things?"

Havoc smirked as he made to open the door for Ed, which Ed growled at him for before opening the back, passenger door himself as Havoc backed off and made his way to the drivers' side door. They climbed in and put on seat-belts, Havoc tossing his cigarette and exhaling the inhaled smoke before answering.

"Maybe when the chief gets married," he said jokingly.

"As if that would ever happen," Ed replied automatically. He detested the pit of hurt that stung him at the idea but decided to ignore it. "That bastard still as lazy as ever?"

"Yup," Havoc answered as they pulled away and made their way down the street towards H.Q. "Can't ever get him to actually do all of the paperwork, I have to say I have a great deal of sympathy for the Colonel, all those years of dealing with him and she never did really shoot him."

Ed laughed; he couldn't help it, seeing Havoc in Hawkeye's position was rather amusing, Havoc glared at him through the rear view mirror. "Anything entertaining happen while I was gone?"

"No," Havoc said with a sigh, "it's been dead and boring around here without you boss. Glad you finally came back, though I do know that you're probably not going to like some of the news you receive."

"Why's that, have they already got another long winded, pointless, shitty assignment for me?"

"Hell yeah they do, it's you. You can ask the chief about it, you're supposed to report to him on General Holigan's request, the old man said he didn't know what to do with you this time around."

Ed's eyes and expression darkened, he could guess what it was that Holigan was having trouble dealing with, that last fight that had gone on back in Xing. Ling had more to do with the destruction and the deaths than he did but of course he had to give reasons why and explain shit. It was crap, this was why he had tried to talk Ling out of killing those bastards, but the prince had ignored him and told him something about someone having to protect him when no one else could. Ed had been furious, they'd had a fight, did other things, and well that was the end of it.

Of course, until now. Now he'd have to go through all that again and of course he had to tell Mustang, of all people, what it was about.

"You alright boss, you look a bit pissed."

Ed crossed his arms over his chest, "Whatever fucked up assignment they have would be better than having to report to that bastard again."

Havoc sighed and showed his identification as they came up to the gates blocking the parking lot of H.Q. He drove around for a bit before finding a spot to park and then they got out of the car. Havoc pulled his pack of cigarettes from his pocket and glanced at Ed in question waiting until Ed shrugged before lighting it. They walked across the parking lot and towards the parade ground entrance, pausing so Havoc could finish his smoke then the older blond said, "I know you and the chief have never gotten along, but we have all missed you around here. You didn't spend that much time in Central before you were sent on a long ass assignment in another country. You've been part of the team for a while and we all still consider it that way."

Ed nodded, "Thanks, I know, it is great to be back, just not looking forward to the interrogation."

"I would bet not, but hell, if you need to get away or something you could join me, Breda, and Mikey at the pub."

"Mikey, since when did he become one of your drinking buddies," Ed asked as they finally entered the building and crossed the parade grounds.

"He incorporated himself into our group, which is fine; he's less gullible than Fuery and less boring than Falman."

Ed smirked, Mikey was definitely those things. At the mention of the North H.Q. soldier he remembered the General and how she had kept her promise as much as she possibly could. He knew Mikey was really only transferred here for his sake, but he was grateful for it. Having someone who knew wasn't that bad and it did help, Ling had been more help than harm if he was honest, but that didn't mean he was ready to tell everyone about it. He hated pity and he didn't want to end up resenting those around them because pity was thrown his way from them.

Ed followed Havoc silently lost in his own thoughts on what he could say without giving away anything, damn all those politicians and diplomats, he used to be able to say anything and nothing at all but now he had to think about what he said. Ling wasn't much help with his ability to read between the words he said and pay attention to all his reactions. It was hard lying to that bastard and he knew it would be just as hard, if not more so, to not give Mustang and Al the answers they wanted.

They made their way upstairs and before Ed knew it he and Havoc had stopped before a pair of doors, "Ready boss?"

Ed took a deep breath and nodded then without giving Havoc the chance he opened the door and made his way through into the outer office to find Breda, Falman, Fuery, and Hawkeye waiting for him with smiles, well as close to a smile as he would get out of Falman and Hawkeye anyway. There was warmth in Hawkeye s' eyes that helped his smile feel a bit more genuine.

"Yo Ed," Breda said as he made his way over and clapped him hard on the back, but it wasn't Armstrongs' greeting so Ed kept his ground. Breda laughed, "I see you've finally grown a bit." Ed glared halfheartedly at the man who laughed and Fuery flushed, Fuery was easy to embarrass, and then the bespectacled member of the team greeted him with a salute and, "Great to see you sir."

Ed grimaced, he wished everyone would seriously listen, officer, state alchemist, yeah so, he didn't like the formal crap. "I've told you it's Ed and yeah great to see all of you too, where's Al?"

"Right here brother," Al voice sounded from the direction of the inner office. Ed turned towards that voice, everyone else became invisible in his brothers' presence and he truly smiled at the sound and sight of him. Al returned the smile before he practically lunged for him and embraced him in a hug that was met with equal fervor. Al pulled back and Ed felt his eyebrow twitch at the fact that Al was a good few inches taller than him. Damn it, he had grown, he had, but his younger brother was still taller than him.

"Glad to finally have you back brother, how are you, have you eaten, have you slept, did you remember to-"

Ed laughed; he couldn't help it and reached up to mess up Al's hair. Al batted his hand away with a glare and Ed cut him off before he could speak, "It's great to see you and I could ask the same of you. Yes I'm fine, I slept and I remembered to shower though it is time for another one, no I haven't eaten yet."

Al nodded with a smile and then Ed was all but dragged into the office and the door was shut behind him by Hawkeye as she followed the two into the room. Mustang was there, behind his desk, watching with an amused smirk that made Ed want to click his tongue in irritation. Before Ed could do anything else but gasp in a breath Winry had tackled him and was hugging him, she pulled back after a moment and then promptly hit him upside the head.

Ed grimaced and rubbed at the sore spot, "What the hell woman?"

"I'm sure you deserved it for something."

Al laughed and Ed glared at her and then his expression softened as he heard a small, childish voice say quietly, "Momma?"

Winry smiled down at the child hiding behind her leg with her tiny hands wrapped in her pants' leg. Ed took a moment to take in everyone's appearance, mostly his brother and sister-in-law's. Winry's wardrobe had changed; she dressed more comfortably, a pair of simple khaki pants and a whit button up blouse with casual shoes. Al wore mostly the same thing, their coats folded over the arms of the couch. A small, red, thick coat was folded over what Ed concluded was Winry's jacket. He smirked at seeing the color and then turned his attention to his niece; she really did look a lot like Winry and Al.

Her blue eyes the same as her mothers' and her grandmothers' before her and the dark shade of blond was very much Al's along with the nose. Her eyes were questioning, curious, and a bit weary and nervous. He expected that kind of reaction though, this was the first time they had ever met and she was only two years old.

"Hi Marianna," Ed began and Al smiled warmly at the two before kneeling down and addressing his daughter, "It's alright Anna, this is your uncle Edward. We've told you about him and you've seen pictures of him. There's nothing to be scared of."

Anna glared and Ed had to stop himself from laughing, that glare suited the daughter of Al and Winry, a mixture of both. Anna tilted her head to the side and Ed blinked when he suddenly found his arms full of a two year old. She was wearing a pair of white stockings and a long sleeved, knee length dress and he had not expected a two year old to knock the breath out of him. She looked up at his face from her new position on his lap with a wide smile, "It's about time you got here Uncle Eddie."

Ed scowled at the nickname and glowered at Mustang when he heard the man snicker from his desk. "Not Eddie, Anna, just Ed is fine."

"Nuh-uh," she shook her head, her long hair tied back in a ponytail moving with the motion, "Eddie."

"Not a chance, Ed, Marianna."

"Anna, everyone calls me Anna."

"Everyone calls me Ed."

"Not me," she actually stuck her tongue out at him and Ed looked to Winry and Al who didn't seem inclined to help him out with their daughter. Ed glared but she glared back and he couldn't help but see a bit of his own stubbornness shining through his niece, damn his luck and his genes and the Elric stubbornness. He was not going to give in to a two year old and let her call him by some crappy nickname.

"Ed."

"Eddie."

"No, just Ed."

"Nuh-uh, I want to call you Eddie, you were gone too long."

"Not my fault."

"But still, Uncle Eddie."

"No."

Ed stared wide eyed when Anna turned on his lap and looked imploringly at Mustang and said, "Uncle Roy, Uncle Eddie is being a brat."

Ed scoffed, "The hell I am, you're the brat," Ed muttered despite how much he wanted to think he was going to get his way with his niece.

Mustang motioned with his hand for her to come to him and Ed watched her leap up and make her way towards him. Ed got to his feet and glared heatedly at his ex. C.O. as the man turned towards his niece and whispered something in her ear. She nodded and then she smiled and ran over to him as he finished straightening out his clothes and she looked up at him thoughtfully and continued to smile.

"Edo or Eddie."

Ed glared death at Mustang, damn that man, telling his niece the other nickname he'd had to put up with and hated above all else. "Neither."

"Nu-uh, one or the other."

"You're in no position to-"

"Yes huh, I am."

"How so?"

"'Cause, I just am," she stuck out her tongue again and Ed suppressed the urge to groan. Now he recognized some of the traits, they were his.

"Fine, brat."

She jumped and hugged him around his knees, "Nice to meet you Uncle Eddie."

Ed continued to glare death at Mustang, not even five minutes around him and he wanted to kill him. Well, that was better than some of the things he'd wanted to do to the man in his dreams or following dreams or thoughts of him. He shoved those far back into his mind, now was definitely not the time nor did he want to even think about any of that. Ed patted Anna's head and she beamed up at him and then Mustang cleared his throat, "Now then, can we get this debriefing over with?"

"I wrote a report, stop being so lazy and actually read it," Ed sniped.

"There are blanks that must be addressed concerning your report and the Prince's account on the events raised some questions that need to be addressed."

"Whatever, I don't think some of the details are appropriate for some ears," Ed answered with a glare.

Mustang nodded and looked to Winry and Al, Winry sighed and grabbed a hold of Anna, who protested and thrashed and said, "I don't wanna go, I wanna stay with Uncle Eddie," Ed's eyebrow twitched.

"We're just going to wait in the next room Anna, Ed won't be able to leave without you knowing about it," she added the last part with a pointed look to Ed. She shared a glance with Al, who nodded discreetly and then she carried Anna out of the room and closed the door behind her. Ed watched after them until Mustang addressed him once more, Ed looked to him but didn't meet his eyes; "I would like to know why a reunion with such individuals would affect you in such a way as to cloud your judgment."

"That can be addressed in my report on my time spent in Rousia," Ed answered smoothly. He could feel all eyes on him and how Hawkeye's lips had thinned at the mention of his time spent in Rousia. He wondered how much she knew but didn't think much of it, she had as many secrets as he did and he knew he could trust her enough to know she wouldn't ask him until he was ready to answer.

"I was hoping you would enlighten us," Mustang replied.

"You already know what you need to and more than enough already."

"I prefer to have all the facts."

"Which you do, doesn't the General send you copies of everything I do anyway? You've always been a nosey bastard."

"Brother," Al said with a bit of a warning in his tone. Ed shrugged, "I had previous encounters with them," that was putting it lightly his mind supplied before he continued; "and that's why it affected my judgment. It was dealt with."

"That doesn't explain the scale of the damages nor the unusual inactivity on your part."

Ed didn't answer letting the silence grow between all of them, he had already told Mustang to refer to the report he had been forced to write out on his time in that damn country and the hell he'd gone through.

"What did your previous encounters entail Edward," Hawkeye asked breaking the silence. Ed closed his eyes and folded his arms over his chest defiantly, "That is covered in my report from two years ago."

"I have read the report many times over Fullmetal, but even that report has holes in it. I believe I have been more than patient enough in waiting for the holes to be filled."

"They can fill themselves."

"Not when those involved have been 'dealt with' as you put it. That leaves you the only one who can fill in the gaps."

"Yeah, well tough," Ed said gruffly. Mustang glared, seemingly challenging him but Ed glared right back, "besides, my contract doesn't say I have to report to you anyway."

"No, but General Holigan has given me the assignment of figuring this out."

"Well good luck, you're supposed to be intelligent, figure it out for yourself. I'm tired and hungry and would much rather be taking advantage of my mandatory leave than sitting here having this pleasant conversation with you, General."

Mustang sighed and ran his hands through his hair, "Very well then. I can't force you to say what you would rather not. You have sufficiently answered all the questions the military has. Maybe one day you will answer the questions your friends have."

"Not anytime soon so just leave it alone bastard. Can I go now or did you have something else you wanted to waste my time with?"

"There is the repercussions of your actions and lack of actions while in Xing. General Holigan has requested that you go through the mandatory training of every enlisted soldier. He believes it will aid you in having something to fall back on when your own judgment-"

"Fine, whatever, when?"

"Once you return from your leave."

"Alright then, so four days from now, where at?"

"You will have to wait until the new recruits come through for processing and training. You can chose where you wish to go through your training but I recommend remaining in Central. The new arrivals will begin in a weeks' time and the meeting place is in the Parade Grounds." Hawkeye explained as she walked over to him and held out a file folder, "This is to inform you of what the training entails, the different locations, and some of the paperwork you will need to complete so that you can be processed in."

Ed nodded and took the file from her, "Thanks," he looked to Mustang, "Is that all?"

"Yes, dismissed."

Ed stood up and turned to leave pausing when Hawkeye said, "The paperwork will need to be finished as soon as possible."

Ed turned, bowed and said, "Alright, thanks. See you later."

Al got to his feet and followed Ed out of the office and past everyone to head towards the dorms. Ed paused at the sound of his brothers' voice calling out his name. Al had better not start asking him questions, Mustang had pissed him off enough and he could really care less if he'd pissed off the man. He wasn't saying anything until he damn well felt like it and he doubted he would ever trust the man enough to tell him anyway.

"Brother, are you alright?"

"I'm fine," Ed answered automatically, Al grimaced seeing through the lie but Ed didn't elaborate. Ed heard Al shift behind him and then the footsteps of Winry and Anna coming their way, "We are staying with Gracia for the time being, why don't you join us? Miss Gracia would love to see you again."

Ed nodded, "Yeah, that's fine." He finally turned to look at them seeing the concern etched into their faces, "I'm going to go check in with General Holigan and let them know I'm back then I will meet you there." He wanted a bit of time away from everyone really, and he was going to see the General, but mostly Mikey. He wanted to ask about the training at North H.Q., at least there he wouldn't have everyone worrying and asking him questions he wasn't ready to answer, and hell he was tough and could handle tough training. He'd been a field officer for ten years already, which made him feel a bit old, most of his life he'd spent in the military. Why in the hell had he even renewed his contract?

"Brother?"

Ed sighed, "I'm fine Al, go ahead and I will meet you there. I have some things I need to take care of before I head out," Al still looked hesitant but Winry came forward and smiled at Ed, "Okay, we will see you in a little while."

Ed nodded his thanks and then headed off down the hallway, he didn't waste time turning down hallways and heading towards the other end of the building towards General Holigan's office. He really just wanted to talk to Mikey, but it would be good to see the others as well. He did feel like part of Mustangs' team, he valued their friendship and their support but his new team was important to him too. They were his friends and at least with them he felt like he could relax a bit more. They didn't pry, though Mikey did watch him like a hawk when he wasn't in control of his darker emotions, and hell they gave him a break from everyone else.

He turned down another hallway, ignored the privates that saluted him as he passed and headed for the door at the end. He didn't knock, didn't need to, this was his place, his office as much as it was the other officers. He paused when he opened the door and grinned at the bewildered looks that greeted him. Diana was the first to show her happiness, her eyes sparkled and a smile curved across her lips as she got to her feet.

She stood at an average height of 5'7" and Ed would have considered her attractive had he noticed before and were his sights not elsewhere. She had nice curves; pale skin, toned arms and legs, much like Hawkeye and sometimes her attitude reminded him of the stern woman. Her long red hair that complimented her pale skin and sharp, pale, blue eyes was tied back in a bun. As usual, her uniform was crisp and neat, but she didn't give him a handshake or a nod, she hugged him close and said warmly, "It's so good to see you have returned to us Edward."

That was another difference with this team; they addressed each other, while in only each others' company, by their first names. Being addressed by their last names meant business and ranks meant they were pissed. As for Ed, Fullmetal meant the same as rank, but was usually reserved for the General when he was highly and truly peeved about something Ed had done. Everyone had said he had not spent much time in Central since his return, but he had spent enough time to get to know and become friends with his new team.

Diane released him after he returned her hug and said, "Missed you too Diane. How are you?"

"I'm fine, especially now that you're back. What's that you have," she didn't give him time to answer before the file he was carrying was snatched out of his hands. He reached for it but she turned away from him, another thing, his rank didn't mean anything to them, not because of his age, but just because he was part of the team and was one of them. That's probably why all the saluting, sirs', and the formal military dress and ceremony pissed him off, he was used to these guys and Havoc and Breda.

Ed had only a moment to glance around and see Lee standing by the filing cabinet sorting files before he was gripped around the waist and picked up. With an indignant squawk Mikey had him in the air and had turned around to put him down only to grab him by the shoulders and look at him with a grin, "You grew a bit, still not taller than me yet brat."

"Can it Mikey," Diane snapped.

"Make me Diane," Mikey replied. Ed rolled his eyes, these two were always bickering and Mikey may be three years older than him but he acted a lot younger sometimes. He was lightly tanned and he did stand a whole three inches taller than Ed's now 5'8". Ed knew the man had plenty of scars, had heard that Mikey was part of the uprising against Bradley and the humunculi. He had short, dirty blond hair that was naturally spiked and stood up in different directions and brown eyes that often had a lazy awareness to their gaze that reminded Ed of Havoc.

Lee was a lot like Falman, book smart, knew something about everything, hardly spoke two words unless asked a direct question and even then he was very vague depending on the question asked. He had short black hair, stood at 5'10", which Ed noted was the same height as Mustang, and had pale skin that reminded him of Mustang and Ling. His eyes had that slant to them that showed he was of Xingese lineage and he was also skinny and limber like Ling. Damn his brain, if it wasn't one dark haired, dark eyed bastard it was the other.

He knew that everyone of these people could hold their own in a fight, they were intelligent, and they all worked well together. It had taken very little time before he was considered a part of the team and as he pulled out of his thoughts he was a bit grateful that Diane and Mikey were still bickering back and forth and then Diane looked to him.

"So, you're finally going to be made to go through the hell the rest of us went through huh?"

Ed shrugged, "Yeah came to talk to the old man about that."

"I'm hardly old, though I wonder how Mustang doesn't have grey hair with a subordinate as insubordinate as you," General Holigan said from the doorway of the inner office. Ed sighed, "Uh, hi."

"Hi? That's it, boy get your ass in here before I tan it for you," the General said before turning and going into the office. Diane and Mikey smirked and Ed flipped them off as he headed inside the inner office. The General was making his way around his desk and sitting down as Ed crossed the threshold and he motioned to the door, "Shut the door and have a seat."

Ed did as he was told and all but fell into the chair, he did prefer this old man over Mustang, at least this guy seemed more laid back and well he had stopped thinking of Mustang as a father figure when he was sixteen and this General was better at the taking on the role anyway. The General sighed and sat back in his seat folding his hands in his lap and looking over to the bookshelf against the wall on the left side of the room from where Ed was seated.

"You caused a bit of a mess just before you left, care to tell me what happened?"

"I did," Ed answered simply.

The General looked at him with a look that told Ed he wasn't taking that as an answer and didn't give a damn what the report or the letter he undoubtedly received said. Ed sighed and closed his eyes, "Shit happened, those assholes from Rousia showed up, and I fucked up. Ling took care of them and I fixed most of the damage before I left."

"I know all of that already; I do read your reports. Since when is Prince Ling just Ling?"

"Since I spent two years around the lecherous jerk."

"Ah, of course," the General said with a smirk. He then turned in his chair so that he was facing towards Ed and looked at him with a stern expression, his green eyes hardening and his voice taking on a serious one, "I spoke with Olivia. She didn't tell me everything but I'm not a patient man and I like to know what has happened and what is going on with those in my command. I take it these assholes; a fitting title that is, had very much to do with the grievances you underwent while you were held captive in Rousia."

Ed swore under his breath and his shoulders slumped even more as he looked at the ground, "Yeah, basically."

"Then they got what they deserved. I will be expecting a full report at some point in time, but the information you've provided and what General Armstrong had to say is enough for now. Before you begin the training," he looked to the folder Ed had snatched back from Diane as he'd passed her, "I am requesting that you go through another psychoanalysis, it is not up for discussion," he added when Ed made to protest, "I am looking out for the welfare of my team and everyone in it needs to be in top shape for the team to continue working."

"I've been absent for two years, why does it-"

"I said it wasn't up for discussion and this team has not been given one field assignment in your absence. Not ones that actually help with the reputation anyway, apparently those are given to teams with State Alchemists. I do believe Mustangs' team has had plenty of field assignments, but you were given most of the ones that hold any sway on the opinions of the higher ups."

Ed sighed, he didn't want to go talk to some counselor, he had done that already, three damn times before they had approved him to go on the mission he'd just returned from. Now he had to go and talk to that bitch again, it was bullshit. He grit his teeth and glared at the wall. The General let out a tired sigh, "I know you don't much care for Dr. Susami, but she is the only one that is certified to handle you and she's also the best. You're a decorated officer and State Alchemist, the military values you over plenty of its other officers and State Alchemist."

"Yeah, I know, doesn't mean I like this bullshit."

"Well too bad, should have thought about that before you extended your contract. Now then, did you have any questions about the training?"

Ed shrugged and forced himself to cool down, he could be as pissed as he wanted to, he was still going to have to go talk to that woman and he did know that the order wasn't from the General himself but someone higher up since he had been in sorry shape the last time he was gone for two years. He straightened, "I haven't read the file yet, so I don't know what to ask anyway."

"Did you have any place in particular you wanted to go for your training?"

"North H.Q."

"Why in the world," the General cleared his throat, "you are insane. That is for the elite and it's the roughest and hardest training their is. You would have to be tested here to see if you would even qualify."

Ed shrugged, "So what, I know I'm tough and I'm not scared of hard work or broken bones. Besides, I've had enough run in's with the guys from North H.Q. to know they are tough. My teacher survived training up there, so can I."

"You need to fill out what's in that file and read it. I will wait until you get back from leave, which I'm extending to a week, since your family is here and you have catching up to do, and then I will set things in motion. Talk to Michael before you make a definite decision on North H.Q. He's a tough kid and I'm aware you are as well, but I have read about the training up there and will tell you that you had better be very certain that is what you want to put yourself through."

Ed nodded, "I'd already planned to talk to Mikey, and I'm pretty damn sure right now without reading up on it."

"Read up on it anyway and talk to Mikey and then, in one week from now, come back and let me know. I don't want to see you up here for seven days."

"I didn't much like seeing you either pops."

The General smiled, "Get the hell out of my office and spend time with your family."

Ed stood and nodded with a grin, "Go home and spend time with yours before midnight."

The General waved him out and Ed bowed, turned, and walked out of the office. Before he could close the door the General bellowed, "Herth, get in here."

Mikey sighed dramatically before he brushed shoulders with Ed in passing and made his way into the office. Ed said a farewell to Lee who nodded and then to Diane who smiled and made his way out of the office. He decided as he headed down the hallway and back towards the Parade Grounds that he was going to just walk to Gracia's. He hoped that Al and Winry would leave him alone for a while, he would prefer to just spend time with his family and the Hues' rather than think about the past. It daunted his footsteps enough as it was.

* * *

_A/N: Ah, another chapter done, and in order too, ha-ha. The next chapter we will get to learn a bit more about the new team Edward works with. There will be several PoV's the next one is written in, including Mikey's, Ed's, Roy's, and a bit of Gracia's. Things are going to pick up soon now that everyone is back in Central. Thanks for reading and hope you enjoyed._


	4. Chapter Three

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story is a testing ground a different writing style from my usual. It's a fun side story for me even if a plot-line did sneak into it at some point. Hope you enjoy.  
_

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed **  
**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure **  
**Series: FMA **  
**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**  
**Status: Work In Progress **  
**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**

* * *

**Chapter 3**

Michael Herth, major in the Amestrian military, transferred and reassigned from General Olivia Armstrongs' forces at North H.Q. to General Daniel Holigan's team at Central H.Q. His last order from General Armstrong was to keep an eye on one Edward Elric. He was informed fully of the Lieutenant Colonel's time spent in Rousia and he had already felt a flare of fierce protectiveness for the younger man. He was part of the forces during the uprising and had seen the amount of strength, sacrifice, and determination in the State Alchemist. He recalled the first encounter with the young man and how despite his physical state he had been fiercely defiant and his inner strength had never wavered.

As he walked the hallways heading out of headquarters he thought on many things, especially the fact that when you looked to the younger man you saw not a boy but someone who was both old and young. His eyes spoke of many lives, many struggles, much suffering, and knowing of the worst things in life while his body was the only thing that made him appear young. Such a person was one to be respected and he found he admired the young man for his strength to continue moving forward despite everything he had endured in the short amount of time he had lived. Twenty two years old was fairly young but for someone like Edward Elric it was a very long, hard road.

He knew where he could find the Lieutenant Colonel and wondered if he should go there or wait to speak with him. He had not spent enough time around Fullmetal to be able to read him very well but he knew that he at least had his trust and a few times Edward had confided in him. He did prefer to act aloof and lazy most of the time but they both knew he was much more than what he wanted others to perceive him as. Edward had pointed out that he reminded him a lot of Jean Havoc from Mustangs' team.

He smirked, Edward seemed unable to let go of his previous team and he knew that each part of this new team with General Holigan reminded the alchemist of the team he had worked with for most of his military career. But that was fine because there were moments when Michael found himself comparing certain characteristics in a person to those with General Armstrongs' command. He paused along the street outside of H.Q. as he came up to a phone, it was time to call the General and give her an update.

He dialed the number, let it ring, answered the operators question, gave her the code and told her to run him through to General Armstrong at North H.Q. and waited. When she answered he couldn't help but to smirk.

"What the hell are you wasting my time about now?"

"Ah, hello General, it's nice to talk to you again. I was only calling to say that the kid returned today."

"With family at the moment?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Good, wait a few and then address what I told you to."

"Yes ma'am."

"How's the city looking?"

"Troubled but calm."

"Better stay that way. Let me know if the clouds start rolling in, I'm due back in Central by next week."

"So's the kid."

"Good, seems I do have good timing. Go home and rest."

"Yes ma'am. Goodnight."

"Goodnight," she hung up and he did the same with a sigh before turning away from the phone and heading to his dorm within headquarters. Just because Bradley was gone didn't mean they had managed to get rid of everyone who had agreed with and supported the humunculi. It was time he started investigating a few of the bad apples before things got out of hand like they had six years ago.

Instead of thinking back on that he let his mind go through the events of today. Diane had been her usual bitchy self and while he did know that years in the military had the tendency to turn any of the women into bitches because they had to work twice as hard for everything he still wished they would be less bitchy. The General for example, was a tough, scathing, deadly bitch and he'd even had the pleasure, or displeasure, of meeting the women Edward had spent a good deal of time around. His childhood friend and now sister-in-law seemed to only be a bitch to Ed; he would envy the younger Elric for having a chance with her and becoming her husband if he hadn't seen what the girl had done to Fullmetal nearly every time they were around one another.

Then, there was Edward's teacher, that woman was scary and a lot like the General. Strong, damn was she strong, hit hard too, and well independent and a tough old gal. Though, he'd learned not to call that woman old. He could see why Ed viewed women as individuals and he developed the habit after all the run in's with the women Ed had grown up around. The grandmother back in Resembool, Hawkeye, Mrs. Curtis, General Armstrong at North H.Q., his own mother and three sisters, then of course Diane. That woman could flirt and laugh and turn and knock you to the floor in the blink of an eye or catch you with a razor sharp tongue. Why couldn't he meet some simple, sweet, less feisty woman, ever?

He came to stand before the door to his room and pulled out his key from his pocket and made his way inside. Oh well, he was still young and he had work to do anyway, no real time for a girl in his life. He wanted to slap himself for the thought, there's always time for a woman. He closed the door behind him, made his way to the bed in the middle of the room and sank onto it with a heavy sigh. Things were going to get interesting with Elric back; the kid had a knack for finding trouble.

*****************

A warm feeling spread through her, it was so great to see the brothers' reunited once again and this time it was a happier reunion than the last. Elysia and Anna, such an adorable and beautiful child much like her own, had gone to bed nearly an hour ago and when she had checked on the slumbering girls they were fast asleep. Al and Winry were in the living room with Ed and asking him about the differences between Xing and Amestrius. Al had even asked how Prince Ling was doing and she'd found Edward's reaction a bit funny, he'd blushed, stuttered, then said the prince was probably doing just fine seeing as how he just leeched off others all the time.

Both of those boys had grown into fine young men and Winry was a lovely young woman. While she thought her and Al made a fine couple and truly loved and deserved one another she did think they were too young to have a child of already two years. Watching the two of them when they played with the girls or when they just sat close together, content and happy on the couch made her feel a sharp pang in her heart. She missed Maes so very much that sometimes she knew that if it were not for her daughter she would not be able to rise to meet the new day. The hurt and pain of such a loss had not truly dimmed or weakened, it had only become more tolerable in all this time.

She knew she would never find another man she could have in her life and she was content because she would never wish to. But at the same time she found herself wishing and hoping for someone else to find their true love. She came back into the living room with glasses of tea for everyone to which she was sincerely thanked. These three adults had traveled such rough and bumpy roads that it warmed her heart to see them relaxed and happy around one another. She truly wished they would come and visit more often, it was uplifting to see them carrying on with their lives despite all they had faced.

She glanced to Ed as he fell silent while Al and Winry quietly talked over possibly making a trip to Xing one day before Anna started school. He was looking down into his glass of tea with a thoughtful expression and she wanted to brush his cheek and get him to smile because he looked a bit withdrawn with that frown on his face. Such a troubled young man, she thought to herself as she drank her tea, if Maes were still here he would know what to do to help him. She felt a bit ashamed at that, she was plenty capable of being a consultant and caring woman but she was at a loss for as what to do about whatever was troubling Edward.

"Brother," Al said softly to which Ed looked up and the clouds that seemed to have formed overhead lifted and scurried but still lingered there in the background of his mind.

"What?"

"You look tired; perhaps you should get some rest. You can't have gotten much sleep unless you slept the entire way."

Ed nodded and finished his tea before getting to his feet, "Yeah, guess I should get some sleep. Thank you as always Mrs. Hues."

Gracia smiled warmly and nodded as he smiled in return, "You're very welcome and Gracia is fine Edward."

Ed nodded and reached for his coat to which Al asked, "Aren't you going to stay here?"

Ed shrugged and shook his head, "No, I'm probably going to go get a room-"

"Nonsense, there's no sense in you going to stay at a hotel at this hour. There is a spare bedroom upstairs and you're more than welcome to it Edward."

Ed nodded and seemed a bit reluctant to accept the offer, "Thank you. I should get a room tomorrow though; I have some things I need to take care of while I have the time."

Gracia watched after him as he made his way out of the room and towards one of the spare bedrooms. A soft click let them know Edward had decided to stay for the night. What could he possibly have to do that made him feel he couldn't stay here in her home? She always worried about him getting himself into trouble and couldn't shake the feeling this time anymore than she could any other time.

"We should be getting some sleep as well, thank you again Miss Gracia."

"Of course, you two go on to bed. I will just tidy up and will see you in the morning," she said with a smile as they stood and made their way to the room they shared. Anna had decided she wanted to sleep in the same room with Elysia and as Winry seemed to have trouble saying no Gracia found herself having the same trouble saying no to such a request.

******************

Ed lay on the twin sized bed in the comfortable room, there was a desk tucked into the corner with a closet next to it and a small nightstand on the right side of the bed. The bed rested against the left wall with a small window overhead and the lamp on the nightstand would be enough to give him some light if he chose to read through the file Hawkeye had given him. He had kicked off his shoes and placed them on the floor next to the bed and thrown his coat and military jacket over the chair at the desk. His suitcase Al had apparently brought up earlier along with the report and both rested on the desk.

He lay with his arms folded behind his head not bothered by the feel of the automail digging into his head or the coldness because of the steadily changing weather. His ankles were crossed and his eyes were unfocused as he stared at the ceiling. He really hadn't been able to sleep very much, his mind replaying flashbacks of things he'd rather not relive or otherwise turning his thoughts into nightmares he never wanted to come true. He had finally found peace and buried the older sins he'd committed, had moved on from what had happened that night now that Al had his body back.

He did not regret any of the things he'd had to do along the way to get Al's body back, not the lives he'd taken and how he had betrayed himself by taking those lives and crossing a line he'd set for himself. Anything and everything he had done was worth it. His fathers' sacrifice had finally put to rest the hurt he'd felt over his departure, which he had to admit had hurt before he could finally put that to rest. The humunculi were dead, 'Father' was dead and gone, and so were those bastards from Rousia now.

But he still felt as though something were off, as though there was something he had missed or overlooked that was a small nag in the back of his mind. He had his brother back, safe and whole, happily married to their childhood friend and after everything Ed had done to them he was truly happy that they had found happiness with each other. He had a niece, he was back in Central, no one had died on him while he was gone and they were all generally happy to see him. But something still bothered him; it felt like a calm before a storm. But what storm was approaching?

He knew the military still had corrupt officers and that there were still those who thought they could have what the humunculi were looking to get their hands on. But, the alchemists that could actually make it happen had been a part of the uprising, knew what it would do if a stone was created. It was pretty much no longer a threat because none of them would actually do that, decimate Amestrius and its' people for a stone, for power, it was ludicrous and sick and he knew none of the ones he knew who did have that kind of alchemical knowledge and power would do that.

So why had his thoughts gone from one to the other? Why had he gone from the still corrupt members of the military to thinking about the possibility of someone being after the power of the stone? Was that it, was his intuition telling him that was what someone, who he had no idea and couldn't think of, was after? He sat up and climbed off the bed to walk over to the desk and grab his suitcase, he would take a shower and change and go to sleep, or at least try to and worry about it when something actually came up to suggest such things instead of driving himself crazy trying to think up things that were dealt with and in the past.

***********

Al woke up feeling panicked and disoriented and wondering what had woken him up. Then he heard the muffled noise coming from where he knew Ed was sleeping. He apologized to Winry when his shuffling to climb out of the bed woke her. She made to ask but Al simply whispered that it was just a nightmare. She rolled over mumbling something then appeared to go back to sleep. He made his way silently out of the room closing the door behind him. He moved quickly across the floor of the hallway and without knocking went into his brothers' room to find him thrashing on the bed, tossing, pulling, swinging, at some unknown, unseen demon and Al moved without thought.

He knew instantly how to calm him and that's what he did, he called out in a loud whisper, "Brother! Wake up," steadily he said those three words, his voice growing in volume as he approaching Ed's bedside. He knew Ed was like a wild animal when he was ensnared in a nightmare and could see the cold sweat and pallor of his skin beneath the pale moon light pouring in through the window. He grabbed first one wrist then the other and sat on his brother, straddling his waist and said calmly but firmly, "Edward wake up."

Golden eyes flew open and a moment of panic overwhelmed him and he thrashed but Al tightened his hold fighting fiercely to keep his grip on an automail wrist. "It's me brother, wake up." Ed went limp beneath him and stared wide eyed and fearfully at Al and all the younger could do was watch as all of the defenses and guards went up once more. He really wished his brother would tell him about what haunted him, would stop bottling it up, it would consume him one day and it was already eating him alive.

Ed closed his eyes and let out a weary sigh that spoke of relief and exhaustion from years of fighting. "Sorry Al didn't mean to wake you."

Al shook his head, "Are you alright now?"

"Yeah, let go and get off me," Ed answered softly, Al did so hesitantly. He couldn't help but feel as though his brother was holding too much in. While he wanted to ask, longed to know, he knew that was not what Ed wanted nor needed right now. He may not like it but he knew Ed's wounds were too raw, even now, two years later, to be prodded. Al had moved to sit on the edge of the bed and after a few minutes the color returned to Ed's skin and his breathing calmed and the sweat dried. Ed sat up and leaned back against the wall and looked at him, "What, I know you want to ask so you might as well go ahead."

Al hesitated in his reply but sighed and said with a small smile he hoped looked sincere, "You'll tell me when you're ready brother. I don't want to pry-"

"The hell you don't," Ed bit out and immediately apologized, "I know I've been really withdrawn and shit towards you. I don't mean to be-"

"Yes you do," Al said simply, "I don't get why you suddenly think keeping secrets from me is such a good idea, probably your mother hen tendencies," he smirked at the scowl his brother gave him. "Brother, if you won't talk to me then talk to somebody, you can't keep holding it all in."

Ed crossed his arms and Al stood up and glared at him, "I mean it brother, it does help relieve some of the pain. You've always shouldered everything and you can't keep it up much longer. It's already effecting you so very much and I don't like it one bit. I don't like watching you suffer and I wish I could take it all away but I can't so I hope you find someone who can or who can at least help you through it even if you don't think I could help you."

"It's not that Al-I just-I'm not ready to talk about that shit and there's no reason you should-"

"It's not a burden so don't say it is. You're my brother Ed, we're family. We saw more than enough when we were looking for the stone and I wasn't blind to all of that. I'm not a child and I haven't been for just as long as you so don't try to protect me from the evils of the world when I saw the same things as you did."

"Alphonse-I know that already, I'm not an idiot-"

"Yes you are, sitting here holding it all in, it haunts your thoughts and stalks you and we all see it. I see it, the General sees it, Winry and Gracia and Miss Hawkeye see it. We care about you so we notice when something is bothering you, when its' hurting you. I just want you to not suffer anymore brother, we've both suffered enough and what you've been through and sacrificed and live with everyday is not some equivalent exchange of what we've done."

"Alphonse-"

"No. You don't have to suffer and hold the world on your shoulders anymore brother; you deserve to be happy just as much as I do."

Ed fell silent staring at him with emotions racing through his eyes and across his face but he didn't say another word. Al sighed and moved to hug him, to which Ed clung to him before he relaxed and they released one another. Al smiled and said, "Focus on just being home for now, but don't forget that you're not alone. Now try to get some sleep brother."

"Thanks Al."

Al nodded with a smile and made his way out of the room closing the door softly behind him, he heard Ed get out of the bed once he left and heard him moving around but decided it was time to go back to his own room and get some sleep. He was greeted by Winry sitting up in the bed waiting for him with a supportive, warm smile that eased some of the hurt in his own heart at seeing such strong emotions in his brother. He had always thought that Ed wasn't afraid of anything, he used to be very brash and was still temperamental sometimes, but the show of genuine fear and desperation in his eyes when he'd first awoken from his nightmare had sent ice through his veins.

He closed the door behind him as he made his way into his room and climbed into bed. Winry curled against him wrapping her arms around his waist as they lay down and resting her head on his chest. He wrapped his own arms around her and nuzzled the top of her head feeling comforted by the smell of vanilla mixed in with the ever present smell of grass and oil that made up her scent. He felt as though he was finally truly safe and loved in a way that was different but just as potent as the love and devotion between himself and his brother as her warmth settled against him.

"Was he alright, are you?" Winry's voice was soft in the room and she placed a light kiss to his chest as she asked him the sleepy and concerned question.

"I don't know, but he calmed down a bit. I'm alright but I'm more worried about him."

"Give him some time to get used to being home," she replied with a yawn.

Al smiled into her hair, "Yeah, I guess so. I hope he decides on where his home is soon though."

"Me too, you drive me insane worrying about him, you're worse than I was when I was waiting on both of you to come home," he could feel the smirk on her face against his chest and hugged her closer.

"I'm glad you waited Winry and that you chose me too."

"Who wouldn't choose you Al, you're incredible."

Al blushed and placed a kiss on top of her head, "You're amazing so I think you have me beat."

Her arms tightened around his and she yawned yet again. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, "I love you Winry, let's go back to sleep."

"Mm-hmm, love you too Al," and she relaxed completely against him, he steady breathing lulling him to sleep as it often did. He truly and fully hoped that one day his brother would know what this was like; being in love and in the arms of the one you loved. It brought a blessed peace to your mind and healed your heart and soul; this was worth everything they had gone through and worth fighting for. He smiled as he fell back into a light sleep at the thought of another person in his life he felt such an intense love for that was sound asleep in the other room down the hall, his wife and daughter made up a big part of his life now. He only had to try and figure out how to help the other part of his life get through the things trying to drag him down.

* * *

_The Following Morning . . ._

As much as he usually hated waking up in the morning he truly despised waking up with a hangover, he really shouldn't have drank so much when he'd finally made it home. Neither Hawkeye nor Havoc was going to grant him any mercy regardless of how shitty he felt. He would get no pity from Hawkeye who would give him a look that clearly stated 'you did this to yourself.' He groaned as he stood in his kitchen drinking a cup of coffee. He had already forced himself to eat some toast and other than coffee that was all that he could manage.

It was grand, just perfectly grand, to have Fullmetal back so that he could piss him off and make his day less boring so that he wanted to either take him home with him and push that energy into other activities or hit the bottle to try and drive away his frustrations. He needed to stop thinking about Edward in such a way; it wasn't healthy for a grown man to think about someone nearly half his age in such lighting. Though the very sun did seem dull in comparison to those golden eyes that turned molten gold when he was angry.

A sigh, a hand through his hair, and gulping down hot coffee that scalded his throat didn't remove his mind of the image. He had suffered through this for years now, ever since Ed had suddenly no longer appeared to look like a boy but a growing young man, and a very attractive and enticing one at that. The broad, strong shoulders, the confidence that had always been dangerous being turned into an unstoppable force in a way that had changed as he had grown. Then there was the haunting, ever present shadow there that he wanted to cast away. This was more than just lust when he felt pain in his own heart at seeing that Edward was suffering and his instinctive feeling of wanting to shield him, protect him, and heal those wounds lodged in his heart and soul.

Then Ed had returned yet again, after four long years, two of which where no one knew where he was or what had happened and had left the young alchemical genius scarred in ways none of them could fathom. Then the two in Xing that seemed to have brought him back to life and had ignited the fire in those unique, captivating golden eyes. He would have to thank the Prince for whatever he had done to revive Edward even if he had not managed to heal the hurt that was there or ease the suffering. But he was a bit thankful for that because he truly hoped that Edward would come to him for such things.

That was a seamless thought; Ed despised him and loved to push his buttons as much as Roy enjoyed pressing Fullmetal's buttons and riling him up. For years Ed had made it clear that he neither trusted nor liked him and sometimes Mustang was sure that Ed hated him. His attitude yesterday had been much the same as it always was, annoyed, spiteful, and angry. But Mustang had noticed it years ago, that all of Ed's anger and temper was a shield, it was to make sure no one saw what was beneath that or dared to get close.

He had been watching Fullmetal closely and seeing things differently when Ed had slipped in one of his tirades, when his anger had failed him and he had just given into how exhausted and worn down he truly felt for a flash of a moment. Mustang knew that Edward was mentally and emotionally much older than he appeared physically and given all that he had seen and done and given up and been through it was not surprising. But that time, that one moment when Ed had given him a knowing look after their meeting with Bradley, a look that seemed to be imploring, Mustang truly knew that Ed was not a child, not a boy. No boy or child could ever look like that, like some soldier in a war zone that felt like it wasn't worth fighting for anymore.

Then the Promised Day had happened and there were so many close calls and he found that reminded him of that hellish day only intensified how very grateful he was to have those he had in his life. Havoc was a member of the team again, Ed and Al were alive, and his whole team had made it out, barely. He had lost Hawkeye for a moment and if not for that Xingese girl he would have lost her entirely. While he did not feel the way he felt about Ed towards Hawkeye he did love her, she was as much a part of his life as Hues had been and still was each and every day, and he could never turn away from Gracia and Elysia and was grateful to have them all in his life.

Ed's absence had given him time to truly work out how he felt. Those feelings could very well be one-sided. Mustang had realized that his lusting and noticing things about Ed was more than some infatuation. It had steadily grown and he still felt the small moments when his heart had jumped and warmed at the sound of Ed's laughter, the sight of one of his rare and real smiles. He had gone through all of his memories and picked up on small things that helped him see Fullmetal differently and helped him to truly know some things about him.

The way his eyes lit up and how his smile was softer when it was real, the way he tilted his head when he was really trying to figure you out. The way he wasn't as open as anyone would think and could throw defenses up that took others by surprise and led them astray. The way his anger and all those outbursts and rants were not a cry for attention but a way to off balance you and make you completely forget about any concerns you may have had. The way his eyes took on a copper tint when he was well and truly threatened and angry. The very slight and hardly noticeable limp he had when he walked, the weight of his footfalls and how he still managed to move gracefully and silently.

Edward was a predator, a hunter and fighter and he moved fluidly, the sharp edges had smoothed themselves out in the two years he'd been in Xing. His jaw was squared and masculine and adult as much as his shoulders were broad and strong. His footsteps were no longer stomps but steps, like some sort of subconscious dance he had always walked but had only developed as he'd matured. Mustang knew from Ed's chosen wardrobe in his younger years that Ed was toned and there was a lot of power in his frame. The height only helped to amplify the fact that Edward was no longer a child or a volatile teenager, he was an adult and growing up had changed him and softened some edges while it had hardened others to a deadly point.

Mustang knew that Ed was fully capable of taking lives, had seen the evidence to back that up, and yet he still remained set on not taking lives unnecessarily even at the cost of his own. He recalled Ed telling him that while Al had been bound to the armor that it was a double edged sword kind of existence. If Ed had died then Al would have too and accounting's from Winry and May when he'd spoken to the young Xingese princess had proven that. He had never received a report but he'd caught a glimpse of the scar and that was enough. Once Al had been restored to his body and Ed had returned from the hell he had been locked in for two agonizing years he had returned to the mindset of never taking lives at any cost, only to save the lives of those who meant everything to him but not even for his own existence would he take a life.

That had brought forth another fact about Edward; he would give and force himself far beyond his own limits, endanger his life, endure any pain, and even die for those he cared for and for perfect strangers. Ed was a very selfless person even though his search for the stone had seemed selfish he had done it for his brother without ever once truly believing or wanting to restore his own limbs. Ed's selflessness was also a flaw in the fact that Ed held no value of his own life, he believed whatever he suffered he deserved and thought that as long as those around him were happy that was enough. He never seemed to seek for his own happiness or for anything for himself.

Mustang looked over at the clock on the wall and after pouring himself another glass of coffee and quickly consuming it he headed out of the small kitchen, across the living room, past the den, up the stairs, around the corner and into the bathroom at the end of the hallway. He had already set aside a clean uniform on his bed in his room through the door along the right side of the spacious hallway. He could further dwell on how he could possibly earn Fullmetal's trust and try to at least see if any of the tenuous amounts of respect and 'friendship' if he used the term lightly was still present between them.

He did make a mental note to stop by the grocery store tonight before he came home, he had run out of bread and lunchmeat, seeing as how that simple fixing made up his dinner on the nights he worked too late to stop by a deli. He could cook but he never wished to do so and so kept to sandwich fixings and simple soups and noodle meals. Coffee was always kept in the house; he would never get through the day without coffee.

* * *

_That Evening_

Ed didn't know why the hell he was the one that suddenly had to go to the damn store and grab things that Al and Winry needed, couldn't they go? He knew why they wanted him to go and why they had waited until the absolute last minute to ask him to go. The grocery store that had the milk, eggs, bread, pickles-what the hell, why did they need pickles and, he cursed under his breath about little brothers and how Al wasn't as innocent as everyone thought, fucking pads for Winry and then Gracia had at least looked apologetic when she'd asked Ed to please grab some for her since he would be going to the store anyway. Sure, he had been sent to the store a few times to buy those kinds of things for the women he'd seen in Xing when they had stuck around for more than a day or two but it was still embarrassing.

Al was an evil manipulative brat that's what he was, he had sent him to the damn store to get things you could get anywhere but then he'd thrown in the pickle and the damn pads and Ed's mind halted, he was not going to connect the two nor turn them into perverse thoughts. Damn the Prince too then and his fucking habits rubbing off on him. He all but stomped into the grocery store only to stop after a few paces when a familiar dark head of hair and pale face came into view. It was odd seeing the man so . . . domestic like, he had one of those small baskets you could carry and there was bread and ham and cheese and a gallon of milk and hell it was weird seeing him here.

As though the man had sensed his gaze, he wasn't staring damn it, he looked up and smiled. Ed faltered again wanting to address him with the usual bastard greeting but that was a smile and since when did said bastard smile when he saw him? Ed raised a hand awkwardly and said, "Uh, hi," he cut off the 'out doing you're own shopping for once, lazy bastard,' from his greeting and made his way towards him.

"What brings you here Edward?"

"The same thing as everyone else, needed a few things."

"Ah, well I'm nearly finished with my shopping if you wouldn't mind the company."

Ed shrugged and his mind drew a blank for a minute as to some of the things he was asked to get. He made his way towards one of the check out areas and grabbed one of the small baskets; they were made of plastic and had these aluminum handles, there were better metals but hell the owners of the store were the ones paying for it. He had to glance at Mustang's basket to remember he was sent to get milk and he made his way to the back of the store with Mustang keeping pace alongside him. They both easily and absently fell in step, each footfall falling at the same time and the same foot hitting the ground as they walked.

Mustangs' shoes clicked on the tile floor as they walked past the bread and Ed absently grabbed a loaf as he walked by, checking it for freshness before tossing it in the basket. Mustang smirked, "You usually in a hurry when it comes to everything you do?"

Ed shrugged his shoulder as he shifted the basket to his automail hand so he didn't have to worry about dropping anything. He made his way to the cooler where the milk was stored, grabbed a gallon and checked the date before shifting the bread to fit the milk in the basket, "I guess I prefer to just do things quickly and get it over with."

"I hope you're not that way when it comes to certain engagements that generally involve others," Mustang replied easily with a casual tone and a teasing smirk.

Ed glared at him, "Not that you'll ever figure that out for yourself bastard."

Mustang lifted an eyebrow at the implications in Ed's reply but Ed ignored him and kept going heading towards the eggs to grab a dozen. He had to take the milk out and carry it for the eggs to fit and then he made his way down one of the aisles that had the canned goods and grabbed a jar of pickles.

"That's an interesting choice of items."

"Shut up s'not my list, Al and Winry thought this shit up," he paused in the aisle thinking back through what he was told to grab and a blush touched his face. Mustang wondered what the last item was, it could be a number of things but given the scowl that followed he guessed it was for Winry and Ed was probably embarrassed simply because he was there.

Ed turned and made his way back down the aisle to head towards where the toiletries and medicine was. Mustang followed him easily and Ed shot him a look over his shoulder, "Don't you have a home to get to?"

"Ah yes, but seeing as how I ran into a friend I thought better of returning home quickly."

"Since when are we friends?" Ed shot back as he turned down one of the aisle and grabbed a bag of pads with a blush tinting his cheeks once more, "And shut up, I can see the taunt forming in your mind, these are for Winry and Mrs. Hues."

Mustang smirked despite Ed's warning, "Perhaps you should grab a larger quantity if it's for both of them." Mustang frowned when the package of pads hit him in the face but Ed did grab a larger bag. He tossed it into the basket and stalked off towards the front to check out. Mustang placed the package back on the shelf and followed after him, "Were you planning on remaining at Gracia's for your entire leave Edward?"

"Why, you offering me to stay at your house, not a chance. They sent me off to the store to keep me there another night, I would have left this morning if Elysia hadn't of begged me to take her to school and then Anna had to practically demand I play with her all day and show her alchemy. I don't mind kids and not those two, but they ate up my whole day and now I can't go get a room somewhere so I guess I will have to try again tomorrow."

Mustang smirked; he'd noticed that despite Ed's tone of voice he really hadn't minded the two girls taking over his entire day. He seemed a bit happy about it actually if the way his eyes had lightened was anything to go by, but there did seem to be something bothering him about being at Gracia's. He wondered if it was just old feelings of guilt, he knew Ed blamed himself for Hues' death as much as he blamed himself for it, or if he didn't want to be around those he cared about because he wanted to keep them from figuring out something.

They came to the check out and there was a lovely young woman behind the counter who lit up exceptionally at the sight of them. Mustang usually felt flattered by a woman's positive response to his presence and she was attractive, tan skin, soft brown hair tied back in a juvenile ponytail that made him glance at the high ponytail Edward had taken to wearing instead of his usual braid, and his hair had gotten a few inches longer. Her eyes were blue and she had a oval shaped face and nice curves. He wasn't all that surprised to see the obvious attraction towards Edward coming from her as she stared at him. One would have to be a blind fool to not lust after such a strong, confident, and beautiful young man. He was actually feeling a bit jealous which he had not felt in regards to anyone since he was younger than Ed was now.

Ed turned to him with a glare which made the young woman snap out of her staring and begin to add the prices up of the items Ed had, her face fell a bit at the sight of the pads no doubt concluding that Ed was taken. Mustang thought to himself with a smirk at that fallen look, 'Not yet but he very well will be sometime in the near future,' before blinking at the steadily darkening glare from Ed. He often used to wonder about his thoughts regarding his youngest subordinate but now his thoughts automatically went in that direction regarding the blond still glaring at him.

"Did you say something?"

"Such a bastard," Ed muttered beneath his breath before turning to the girl and handing over the money for the items then waiting for her to put them in a bag. He turned to him again with the bags in hand after pocketing the change, "I said that once I drop this crap off we could go get some coffee or something so I don't have to go insane with Al and Winry giving me those questioning looks. I know Mrs. Hues wants to ask me stuff too," Mustang noticed that Ed rarely cussed in sentences with Gracia mentioned and he'd never heard him cuss when he was talking to her or around Elysia. He didn't seem to have that reservation towards his niece though.

Mustang nodded, "I accept your invitation, I could give you a ride back to Gracia's if you like."

Ed shrugged and stepped back so that Mustang could place his items on the counter, at least he was getting somewhere. Mustang had actually accepted his suggestion to grab coffee, which was unexpected, hell it was unexpected that the words had even left his mouth. Why did he ask him, why in the hell was he a bit happy the bastard had accepted anyway? He stepped back, "You're driving? I didn't know you even had a car."

Mustang looked to him and answered with a small smile, not quite the one that he'd been greeted with but a smile none the less. Why did the guy suddenly smile so easily around him, he was used to the smirks and the condescending tone, the taunts and the sarcasm and the way the guy would push his buttons and never answer a direct question. "I prefer walking to work but it is nice to have a car from time to time."

"Would have been nice not to have to walk in the rain and snow and this cold I guess," Ed replied just to keep the conversation going.

Mustang nodded, "Precisely, it is getting a bit chilly out with winter starting to set in. It can't be pleasant for you."

"Used to it," he answered automatically as Mustang paid for his items, accepted his change and grabbed the bags before turning to him.

"I'm certain you are. Did you have a particular place in mind to go to get coffee?"

Ed shrugged and turned around so that they could walk out of the store, sure enough there was a common, black car waiting just outside in the small parking lot of the store. Ed followed Mustang to it and allowed him to unlock the door and open it. Mustang walked over to the driver's side as Ed climbed into the front passengers' seat and set the bag on the floor before he reached over and put on a seat-belt. He closed the door at the same time as Mustang did and watched the man glance at the mirrors, probably out of habit before inserting the key and starting it and then putting on his seat-belt.

"I'm sure as late as it already is that you've eaten already."

"Uh, yeah, Mrs. Hues pretty much follows a schedule."

"Well yes. She does have Elysia, so a schedule would make sense."

"I wonder if Winry and Al plan on making Anna go to school in Resembool."

"Perhaps you should ask them. Not to sound offensive, but schooling in the city is preferable."

"It's better yeah. They didn't teach us more than the bare basics back in that joke of a school back home."

Mustang smirked, he couldn't help it, and he had spent a good amount of his childhood in the country side before losing his parents and having to move to the city so he had to agree. The singular building with one entire class of all ages and one, old, dingy, strict teacher had not really amounted to much of an education, especially in comparison to the classes for each grade level according to age the city offered. "No, I don't suppose any school would be up to the challenge of teaching you and your brother much of anything."

"No, Al's a genius anyway. Both of us learned more from Teacher than anything anyway."

"She is quite an intelligent woman. From what I have heard she even took up a teaching position in Dublith."

Ed was surprised to hear that, Izumi Curtis, 'I don't take on disciples,' had taken up a teaching job. It was ironic enough that he laughed and he noticed the twitch to Mustangs' mouth at the sound and wondered about that too as he said, "Really, that's interesting enough I might have to call her about it."

He saw Mustang smirk as he continued, "She can't hit me over the phone anyway, wonder why Al didn't say anything about that turn of events."

"You sound like you plan on teasing Mrs. Curtis about that, which may not be a wise decision considering-" Mustang began to say.

"Ah hell, she gave us hell when we were her students I have to get something out of this new information," Ed grinned and he knew it was a mischievous grin as Mustang sighed. They pulled up in front of Gracia's house; Ed had to remind himself that she had bought the house because the apartment she and Maes had lived in probably brought too many memories. The house was nice and probably something Hues would have wanted her to get to raise their daughter in.

"This house was a good choice, Maes would have been happy to see such a fine house for his family to live in and make a home out of."

Ed nodded and grabbed his bags and went through the motions of getting out of the car quickly followed by Mustang who left his own bags in the car for obvious reasons. Ed jumped when Mustang was suddenly beside him grabbing one of the bags from his hand wordlessly as though it were second nature or something. Ed snarled at him, "I can carry it myself."

"Always so charming," Mustang chided with a smirk as they walked up the sidewalk towards the warmly lit up house.

Before Ed could tell him off properly Al opened the door with a grin on his face that made Ed glower at him. Ed held up the bag with the pads, bread, and eggs in it and all but snarled, "Here's that crap you brat, sending me to the store at the last minute to get shit that could have waited."

"Edward, watch your mouth," Winry chided from inside as Al stepped aside to allow them in. Ed brushed past Al as Mustang greeted his brother and best friend politely while he carried the bag with the milk and jar of pickles in it. Al snagged the bag from him after a cheerful hello and made his way to the kitchen as Mustang closed the door behind himself. Ed noticed this from where he was being held prisoner by a niece hanging onto his neck and Elysia hugging him around the waist. Gracia stood inside the kitchen and said in greeting, "Thank you Edward. It's nice to see you Roy."

Ed was released when both girls looked to Mustang and he nodded politely to Gracia, "You're welcome Mrs.-Uh Miss Gracia," he said a bit distractedly as he watched his niece launch herself at Mustang and cling to his neck. The warm smile on the mans' face warmed his heart more than he expected the sight to. He watched a moment more as Elysia greeted Mustang and both girls gave a cry of, "Uncle Roy," as he returned their hugs and gently tugged free of his captors.

Golden eyes locked with obsidian eyes for a moment and he felt a rush of warmth spread through to his bones before he quickly looked away and towards Winry seated on the couch reading a book while Al helped Gracia put up the groceries. Ed snagged the pads from the counter and tossed them to Winry with a smirk on his face. Bet the girls would ask Winry what those were for.

Winry glowered at him and her look darkened when both girls turned to see what had been tossed at her with curious, questioning looks. Gracia walked past him to the living room with a small smile on her face as both girls proceeded to ask Winry what the pads were and what they were used for. Gracia assuaged them saying that they would know when the time was right but for now it was a secret among older women. They looked a bit crestfallen but the death glare he was receiving from his childhood friend was well worth the pouts on the childrens' faces. Served her right asking him to get the damn things in the first place, at the last minute, thus helping Al with whatever plan-Ed stopped and turned to look at Al as he tossed the bags into the trash bin inside the pantry.

Al glanced at him, "Fancy you running into the General brother."

"I would say it was pleasurable, do you mind if I borrow your brother for bit to get a cup of coffee Alphonse," Ed jumped at finding Mustang suddenly standing only a few paces behind him. It didn't matter that he was a bit out of arms reach Ed could still feel some of the warmth radiating from him and that made his own body s' temperature pick up a bit.

Al shook his head with a smile, "Not at all, I was hoping someone would be able to make sure brother doesn't turn into a hermit while he's on leave."

Ed glared at his little brother, so this was his real intention then? Sometimes it was aggravating to have such a perceptive younger brother, of course Al had known how Ed really felt before Ed himself had been able to sort things out. Al must have also spoken to Hawkeye to have instigated the plan of having them meet up at the store. Al smiled and didn't seem fazed at all by the glare sent his way, Ed looked to Mustang when a warm, broad, strong hand fell on his shoulder suddenly and once again their eyes met.

"Shall we go before it gets too late Edward?"

Ed nodded and had to fight to tear his gaze from that dark gaze; he brushed Mustangs' hand off and headed for the front door. He heard Mustang say a goodnight to everyone, who returned it, more clingy hugs from the girls before Winry and Al ushered them upstairs to get ready for bed, and then Ed was out the door with Mustang behind him.

_

* * *

A/N: Ah, it seems I left it at a good point. Ed and Mustang, despite Ed's stubbornness his mouth often doesn't consult his brain. Now is the chance both were hoping for, even if they have to be stubborn about going about it to begin with. No, they are not going to be doing anything that requires the MA rating in the following chapter. This one turned out longer than I had planned but hopefully you still enjoyed. Thanks for reading._


	5. Chapter Four

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story is a pet project for trying my hand at different PoV's, well and of course just for fun. It's my first multi-chapter Roy/Ed story. Hope it proves enjoyable._

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed **  
**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure **  
**Series: FMA **  
**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**  
**Status: Work In Progress **  
**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**

**Chapter 4**

"What exactly was the meaning behind such a dark look towards Alphonse, I find it hard to believe him capable of doing anything to warrant such a look."

Ed shrugged as they pulled up in front of a late night coffee shop, "Nothing much, and Al's not an innocent as everyone thinks he is."

Mustang smirked, "No, I guess not when he has such a role model."

Ed glared at him and Mustang couldn't help but to chuckle as they got out of the car. Ed paused and folded his arms on the roof to look at him. "Why'd you accept?"

"I beg your pardon?"

Ed scoffed, "Going out to get coffee like we're actually friends, why'd you accept? Most the time you always preferred to be a condescending bastard and now you're suddenly talking to me like . . . I don't know, like I'm not a damn kid, which I'm not and haven't been for a while just to clarify that before you say some bullshit about it."

It was Mustang's turn to try for nonchalance as Ed often did. "I assumed that there was a possibility it would surprise you and make you ask questions."

Ed glared, "Jackass, how about a straight answer."

"That was a straight answer."

Ed huffed, "No it wasn't. Since when have we been friendly enough around one another that you would think this was a good idea?"

"You were the one to suggest we go out to coffee if my memory serves me right Edward."

Ed turned away from him and made his way inside the shop, Mustang following behind him but didn't comment to that. Mustang knew the silence meant Ed wasn't going to deny it, not that he could since it was the truth. Ed decided on a table tucked away in the back, probably so he wouldn't be noticed. That was something Mustang had learned to get used to, Ed really didn't like unwanted attention and he had made that very much known since his two year absence. Unfortunately Edward was a striking person, not just physically but mentally as well.

His sharp wit and incredible intelligence made him stand out and he drew attention with those sharp and soft golden eyes. He always moved with natural grace that radiated strength and confidence and Mustang knew that played well in getting others to notice you. His own confidence had drawn many women to him and while it often made him appear like a threat to males sometimes the danger could be used to entice as well.

He knew what he preferred, had known back in the war that he was very capable of bedding a man or a woman and he was comfortable with that even if the military voiced opinions that spoke against it. He knew how to be discreet when he had to be and as he made his way to the table Edward had chosen he casually scanned the area to see if there was anyone that could pose as a problem. They were both lucky that the cafe was mostly empty, a couple in another corner leaned close together and talking softly and a striking woman seemingly captivated by a book she rested on the table next to a cup of coffee.

A waitress that looked no older than Ed came over to their table with a soft smile and a warm greeting before asking them what they would like. Mustang ordered a large cup of coffee, black while Ed ordered a cup of hot chocolate not wishing to have to drink coffee this late. The waitress nodded and with a flirtatious flip of her ponytail over her shoulder and a warm smile sent Edward's way she left.

Mustang watched how her eyes had trailed over Ed's frame as she looked over her shoulder and the way she blushed when Ed glanced at her with a bit of ire in his expression. It seemed as though Fullmetal had not learned the art of flirting or maybe he wasn't interested. Mustang turned his gaze to the young woman, she was rather attractive, small waist, nice curves, a dark shade of red hair to compliment smooth pale skin and there were a soft touch of freckles on her arms and her face as she returned his gaze. She smirked at him and her dark green eyes lit up a bit.

"She's a bit too young for you don't you think old man," Ed said with a smirk to which Mustang tilted his head just so and replied, "She's no younger than you are."

Ed's smirk faltered and his gaze intensified for a moment as though he were trying to figure out what he had meant by that. When his smirk returned full force and his golden eyes darkened a bit Mustang felt his heart speed up a little. "Oh, so you're not above dating someone nearly half your age then?"

"It truly depends on the person. Sometimes it is well worth the risk."

Ed looked thoughtful again and after a moments he leaned forward in his seat and propped his elbow on the table to rest his chin on the palm of his hand. He tilted his head to the side as he spoke, "I didn't think you would think anyone was worth the risk. From the rumors about your dating habits you don't take to real relationships well."

"There isn't much stock in rumors, you should know that well enough."

Ed shrugged and lowered his hand to rest on the table as he leaned back in his seat, "Yeah, learned that lesson early on. So," he paused a moment appearing as though he were thinking of something and decided to change the subject. Which Mustang was grateful for because the tension was becoming a bit stifling. "What has been going on with you, I'm sure the old man sent you copies of all the reports I sent in so you know what I've been up to."

"You never provide sufficient information about what you are up to, especially while on assignment. When one can actually read your handwriting your reports are vague at best."

"Who the hell cares about all the details? I'm not going to send reports that are like fucking journals, I have enough trouble keeping up with the shit going on."

"What was going on while you were in Xing?"

"What was going on with you while I was in Xing?"

"The same as usual, paperwork. Nothing serious happened in your absence and I and my team as well as the team you are now a part of have been dreadfully bored without your constant, aggressive, insubordinate, loud self present."

Ed glared at him and Mustang picked up on how the glare was less spiteful this time around. Ed shrugged, "I already heard I was missed, how kind of you to admit it yourself."

"I didn't say you were missed, I simply stated that we were bored."

"Right whatever," Mustang flinched a bit at the dismissal and the way those golden eyes hardened and brightened in hurt or anger or both.

"It is good to have you back in Central, I received word that you were thinking of undergoing your training in the north."

Ed shrugged his shoulders, he seemed to do that quite a lot, "Yeah, s'not like I plan on sticking around up there after the training is over with."

"It takes a great deal to be approved to undergo such a harsh training regimen. Why would you willingly sign up for that?"

"I don't know. I guess since I chose to stick with the military, might as well actually get a few things out of it. Up there it's about survival not that shit they would teach me here when the most important thing is how to hold a gun and how to march."

"Can you do either of those things?"

Another shrug, "Yeah one of them, not that I care for guns."

Mustang nodded, he had to agree. He preferred his alchemy over a gun as well, most of the time. It would have been less personal if he had been able to only fire a gun during the war instead of having to stain his hands and his alchemy with the lives of an entire race of people. You could put a gun away but alchemy was as much a part of an alchemist as their very skin and bones.

"It would probably be better for you to be training to use a firearm properly so as to avoid tainting your alchemy."

Ed's gaze darkened and Mustang caught it before it could be guarded and shoved back. It wasn't as potent, wasn't as heavy as his own, but Edward knew what it was like to kill with alchemy. When had that happened, why had it happened, why didn't he know about that? In the flash of dark emotion he saw that glimpse of the old in Ed, the scars that couldn't be seen on the skin. Ed was both young and old, naive and wise and that showed in his eyes, in his face, but it was rare and only someone who knew what to look for, who understood, could truly notice it at all.

"Yeah, a gun can be thrown away and forgotten . . ."

Silence fell over them and a heaviness to the air came to them making them look away from one another. The waitress arrived with their drinks and with a smile she asked if they needed anything else. Mustang made to send her off with a polite no thank you but Ed beat him to it. Ed turned his full gaze on her and said with a smile, "No, we're fine thank you," his tone soft, polite even and Mustang watched as the girl blushed, smiled brightly, turned and left with a bow of her head. Ed sighed and raked his left hand through his bangs.

"So, instead of the past crap, what's going on with the peanut brigade. I mean I know Hawkeye is going to be leaving your team to start one of her own soon. Where's she going, anyone going with her?"

Mustang smirked, grateful for the change in subject and the genuine curiosity in Ed's tone and expression. The clouds and haunted look made his heart clench in his chest when it was seen in Ed. "I believe those are things you should ask Hawkeye yourself. She would like to have time to catch up with you. As for the remainder of the 'peanut brigade' as you called my team, they will be remaining under my command."

Ed nodded, "Okay, guess I should ask her. What about you, still have the same ambitions as before?"

Mustang nodded as he took a drink of his coffee. Edward picked up his cup in his gloved right hand and blew on the liquid before taking a sip to test how hot it was. "My goals are much the same as before. What about yourself, you never did make it clear why you chose to stay with the military or what it was you wished to do."

"Don't know what I want to do. Sticking with the military seemed like a good idea, been part of it so long I'm used to it. It pays well and the hours aren't that bad plus I get to travel."

"Haven't you ever thought of finding a place to call home."

"Home is in Resembool, where Winry and Al and Anna and Granny are. I never thought of having another home."

"What about finding someone to make a home with, you're young, are you not even going to look for something concrete."

"You're one to talk about marriage, the seasoned bachelor. You made a name for yourself in the East and now you have one built up here. Why are you talking to me about settling down when I'm _'young'_ as you say?"

"I was merely curious as to whether you had given it any thought."

Ed shrugged and took a large gulp of his drink while Mustang leisurely drank on his own. "Never thought about it much. Ling used to ask me the same shit-"

Oh, that's interesting. Mustang smirked and Ed flushed and finished off his hot chocolate before looking away with a glower. He hadn't meant to say that obviously but it was apparent that he knew Mustang wasn't likely to forget it.

"I didn't know the two of you were close enough to talk of such things. That would explain the letter requesting that all dealings with Xing between our governments have you included."

Ed relaxed and seemed to take the comment with stride, "Who said we were close, I can't stand you half the time and here we are talking about the same crap. That jackass knows I hate politics and he sent some letter requesting I attend that shit?"

"Yes he did and there's no use denying your relationship with the Prince."

"Whatever, its' not like its' any of your business."

"Certainly not, what you do with your free time is your business. Unless of course you decided to spend your free time in my company then I am content with not knowing," Ed raised a disbelieving eyebrow at that.

"Bullshit, you're such a control freak you prefer to know everything about everything so don't feed me that crap."

"I am capable of keeping myself under control enough not to delve into others' private lives."

"Yeah, alright, whatever you say bastard," Ed bit back and signaled for the waitress. She brightened up as she made her way to them from behind the counter. She nodded when Ed motioned to his cup and then her gaze fell to Mustang who gave a short nod that he was ready for a refill.

"It does seem that you learned quite a few things in your time spent in Xing."

"Mostly in the Princes' company," Ed replied easily.

That further confirmed Mustangs' suspicions on whether Ed was involved with the prince. The challenging look sent his way made him smirk and an idea formed in his mind. Maybe he could find a way to confirm whether Ed's subtle flirting earlier had been genuine. It was time to test the waters and see how Ed would react.

"You do seem rather confident in how to flirt, which is surprising considering your lack of interest in previous years."

Ed shrugged and his eyes narrowed suspiciously as he leaned forward in his chair, "Maybe my lack of interest was due to the lack of interesting enough people."

Mustang nodded, "Of course, it is rather hard to imagine anyone you would likely find interesting enough to date. However, there was a pool going about Schezka, the two of you seemed to get along well enough."

Ed waved a dismissive hand, "She's too much of a bookworm for me. Don't get me wrong, I love books and find them useful, but she's obsessed."

Mustang chuckled and was glad to see the way Ed's eyes had darkened at the sound and he seemed to relax a bit more. "I would guess so, but you are what many would call a geek as well, considering the amount of obsession you had with alchemy."

"Have, alchemy is as much a part of me as this automail has become. You're an alchemist, you ought to understand that."

"I do and I have to agree that alchemy is a part of an alchemist. What are your thoughts on Maria Ross?"

"Ross? Was she actually listed as a potential woman I'd date?"

Mustang smirked, Havoc wouldn't be happy to know that Ed was rather adept in the dating circle. Just by calling Maria Ross a woman instead of a chick or a girl told a lot about Ed's know how. He had expected as much, Ed had so many women that he had grown up around and he saw them as individuals which put him way ahead of the others out there trying to get a woman's attention.

In that matter of seconds Mustang had nodded as his answer and their refills had arrived. The waitress gave them both a warm smile but her gaze still lingered on Ed. Ed nodded to her, said a polite thanks and gave her a warm smile that made her blush. Ed was captivating and anyone would be drawn to him, he'd noticed that years ago, how much Ed drew attention from others. He was like the sun, bright, strong, fierce, and he was so very much alive even in his maturity that he had gained over the last four years. Men and women alike were drawn to him and their gazes were often hungry or jealous.

"So, what are your thoughts on her?"

Ed shrugged and blew on his beverage before taking a drink, "I don't know. She's pretty and intelligent, but I never really thought of her that way. Closest I ever came to feeling anything about the opposite sex was with Winry but that faded. She's my best friend and I love her like a sister, which she actually is now, but that's about it."

That wasn't surprising in the least, the way Ed used to look at his childhood friend did used to appear like the look of someone who had a crush or was love struck. But then those two years after Ed had disappeared that look was gone. It was almost saddening that whatever Ed had been through had canceled out any feelings he'd had towards his best friend. The two could have been happy together and Winry had been in love with Ed for quite a while.

"Why do you think it changed, how you felt about Miss Winry?"

Ed shrugged and gazed into his drink as Mustang took a drink from his own and waited for the answer.

"Shit happens and people change. I guess I've just been through too much crap that in my head I didn't think she needed someone as fucked up as me. It's not easy carrying the burden of a hard life and well, I didn't want her to have to shoulder mine."

That made sense and it also let Mustang know that Ed knew what it entailed to be in a serious relationship, to be what Al and Winry were to one another they had to be willing to share and be open and honest with one another. But, he didn't think Winry would agree with what Ed was saying, she could handle a lot more than either of the Elric brothers thought, all those years of waiting and worrying had not been easy on her. It took a lot of strength to wait, he knew that well enough, the waiting for both of them to awaken in the hospital after the 'Promised Day.' The wait for his command to recover, for his own wounds to heal.

He knew what it felt like to wait and those two years of waiting for news, for anything that could tell him Edward was alive had been the hardest two years of his entire life. Only the war had torn him apart as thoroughly as the waiting, worrying, hoping, and steadily growing fear and dread had.

"I believe she would have been able to handle that but as you're feelings towards her are no longer what they once were perhaps it is better that she was never given the chance."

"Yeah, her and Al are happy together and they deserve each other. He knows what to say and how to comfort her, she's always cried so easily and now she knows she can go to him."

"She previously went to you?"

Ed shrugged, "Yeah, didn't know why when she knew I sucked at comforting anyone and often times I was the one that made her cry anyway. I know why now, but she loves Al and he's always been in love with her so yeah, they're happy and that's all I ever really wanted for both of them."

"What about you, are you happy?"

Ed shrugged, "Sure, I got Al's body back and he and Winry are happy together and they have Anna. Granny is good and happy, the old bat, and Teacher is making a life for herself. Everyone has moved on with their lives and that makes me happy."

"That's not what I asked Edward," Mustang stated and held the golden gaze that locked with his own. The tension between them became pliable as soon as their eyes locked and neither tried to break the gaze as Mustang calmly asked again, "Are you happy Edward?"

A moment of silence and then Ed closed his eyes and looked away, he finished off his drink and stood, "As happy as I think I'll ever be."

Mustang finished his coffee and reached out grabbing Ed's wrist to stop him. He noticed the tense set to Ed's shoulders, his entire body went tense as though he was ready to fight. The tension increased and Mustang could even detect a bit of danger tinting the air between them. He knew Ed didn't care for physical contact but he was more concerned with trying to figure out what was going on with him than having any concern over his own well being. If Ed decided to hit him and leave then he would deal with that, was expecting it really. But he would try again.

What he wasn't expecting was for Ed's shoulders to slump and for his gaze to turn to him. He wasn't expecting to look into golden eyes that looked so old, so full of suffering and pain and exhaustion. He wasn't expecting his body to react and for him to tug Edward closer so that he stood right next to him so he could feel the adrenaline, the warmth from his body mingling with his own. He wasn't expecting those eyes to hold his and remain so open or for Ed to speak to him with that husky tone to his voice, "Are you happy?"

He tore his wrist from his grip, turned and headed out of the cafe, Mustang left a bill on the table that would leave a generous tip for the waitress and followed swiftly after him. He noticed Ed had not headed for the car but was walking deeper into the city and not heading anywhere in particular really. Gracia's was the other way, H.Q. was another direction, and the car had been there. Where was he going?

"Edward," Mustang called as he picked up his pace to try and catch up. Ed's pace didn't change but his hands went to his pockets and his shoulders slumped against the biting chill of the night. "Ed, wait, where are you going?"

Ed didn't answer him and Mustang started to jog until he was only a few paces behind Ed who didn't turn but kept going. Mustang said his name again, "Edward, why are you running?"

Ed did turn, stopped even, and faced Mustang so suddenly he had to stagger back a step at the sudden movement. "I'm not running, wish I could. Look, I'm going to go for a walk, feel free to go home and get back to your daily life alright."

"If I somehow upset you-"

"You didn't, so don't feel obligated to make sure I'm alright, I'm fine, always fine."

"Fine is hardly good enough and I'm not so blind as to believe such shit coming from you. I'm not blind Edward, I know a haunted man when I see one. Everyone has demons."

"Yeah, they do. Mine I can handle."

"Not from the looks of it," Mustang said sharply with a glare.

Ed never did back down from him and he glared back, "It's none of your damn business anyway. I've dealt with my sins just fine on my own. I don't need your damn help."

"Can't you trust anyone to help you, there are people that care about you and we all see that you're suffering."

"Well none of you can help alright-"

"It's not pity so don't glare at me like that. You're much too strong of a person for any of us to pity you. We may sympathize, we do want to be able to do anything we can to lesson the burden you carry on your shoulders-"

"Burden, what damn burden? All the shit I've carried around with me was because of my own fuck ups-"

"What you were put through and forced to endure in Rousia-"

"Don't you fucking dare," Ed took a step towards him, real, genuine, snarling, dangerous anger in his tone, his eyes, the tightened jaw and clenched fist screaming that Mustang was in serious danger of getting hit broaching this subject. "You don't know fucking shit about what I went through there and I sure as hell am not going to tell you. I'm not some little kid that needs to go and cry on an adult's shoulder. I lived through that crap, I broke out, I moved on."

"Then why are you still pushing everyone away? Why do you find it so hard to trust us, to confide in anyone of us that care about you? Why can't you answer whether or not you're happy? Do you think you don't deserve it?"

"Shut the hell up, you can't answer that yourself. Why the fuck should whether or not I'm happy matter to you anyway?"

"I do see you as a friend Edward and I would like to see you happy just as I would wish it for any of my friends. Jean, Kain, Heymans, Vato, Riza, they are my friends as well and their happiness and safety is something I concern myself with."

"Well, who the fuck says I consider you a friend or want your fucking concern?"

"Why would you care if I were happy?"

"Because you deserve it, all the shit you've been through, the things you do for others in your own manipulative, puppeteer way of doing it. You were Hues' best friend and he was a good man so you must be too for him to view you as a brother. You deserve it so I think you ought to find happiness somehow."

Mustang relaxed as Ed's aggressiveness lessened and his hands loosened at his side, he caught his gaze and held it, "Thank you, I'm flattered that you believe even a bastard like myself deserves happiness. But, so do you Edward."

Ed took a step back to which Mustang wondered at but he didn't take a step forward and let Ed retreat. He was about to ask if Ed wanted him to take him to Gracia's when Ed broke the silence that had fallen over them, "I-I should head back."

"I will give you a ride," he added when Ed looked as though he were going to protest, "No point in worrying everyone with you walking."

Mustang hadn't said a word while they drove back to Gracia's and Ed was fine with the silence. What could he really say to the man anyway, some parts of this, whatever the hell having coffee with him was, had been pleasant. They could have a civil conversation, but it didn't last long between them. Ed turned his head to look out the window, he'd acted childish lashing out like that, saying the shit he said. He could admit it to himself but he knew if he apologized, which why should he when Mustang had been an asshole anyway and shouldn't have said some of the things he did, then the bastard was going to read into it.

Like he doesn't already read into everything anyone does anyway. Plus you damn well know he pays as much attention to you as you do him. He scowled at the shit his head was saying and sank down into the seat, it was bad enough the bastard had openly flirted with him, he'd spent enough time around Ling and being dragged off on dates with the women in Xing to know flirting, he wasn't oblivious to it. That waitress, the cashier at the store, he noticed them watching him, trying to get his attention, but when he was with Mustang he didn't give a damn or a thought to flirting back.

Fuck this, he thought savagely, this bullshit game is long since dead. I should just go for it and find out how the bastard feels and we can go from there. I'm not playing the dating game with him, the hell with it if he wants to play games with me. I'm tired of games and tired of not knowing what the fuck to say or do. Asking me if I'm happy, he'd been tempted to say, 'No, how the fuck can I be when you and Ling haunt my every fucking thought. I can't decide whether I want to go back to Xing and stay with Ling to escape worrying over how you feel or wanting to pound your face in and tell you I couldn't stay with Ling because you were driving me insane when we were fucking countries apart.

He didn't even know why he had said anything or even mentioned the idea of going to get coffee with the man. He was lining himself up to get hurt and he knew it. Not only that but he had meant what he'd said when he pointed out the obviousness of the General driving the car wanting to know everything he could. He hated being left in the dark because it probably made him feel vulnerable or something. He had no clue really but it was probably going to pose as a problem given that he wasn't anywhere near up to talking about anything personal. Making it known that he knew what a relationship was like and that he wasn't some naive virgin or something was safe ground and surprisingly Mustang had not seemed jealous or overly curious about that. No, the asshole was curious about him personally, asking him if he was happy . . .

All the damn questions, the way Mustang had noticed the words he'd left unsaid, bastard was always good at listening. He paid attention to what people said, what their body language and their eyes said and what they didn't say. He always seemed to know every damn thing and now Ed knew how he knew it, he'd given himself away with his anger. Being defensive and changing the subject by over reacting and making everyone forget about it had worked when he was a teenager but it wasn't going to work anymore. He knew that, knew his anger wasn't going to get him anywhere.

Fuck he knew that his anger could get him into more trouble. He shuddered and crossed his arms over his chest when a detested memory of what his anger had gotten him had resulted in back in Rousia. He closed his eyes when he felt Mustang's gaze flick to him and huffed, mocking irritability and anger, it didn't work. Mustang broke the silence finally and asked the one question Ed wasn't in any frame of mind to brush off.

"Are you alright?"

Ed didn't answer, just gave a half hysterical laugh at the mundane question. No, he wasn't alright, he didn't know if he'd ever have the chance to be alright. For two fucking years he'd been nothing but a damn slave and to try and straighten his head out he'd accepted an assignment to Xing that lasted two years. Sure, he'd managed to move on, to get over the frustrating as hell skittishness and allow another person to get close, to be his friends and worry and he'd answered questions from Ling and grew to allow himself to fall into something else to chase away memories that tormented him endlessly.

That's why that fling had started, he'd wanted to forget it all, had drank until he couldn't stand, had dated and had one night stands and even dated a few women and a couple of men back in Xing because he'd thought it would let him breath for one fucking second. It had but it never lasted long, it never really went away, the memories kept persisting to tear him apart. Before, those long years of searching, all the fighting, all the close calls, all the times of picking himself back up again and plunging forward had been driven by the self hatred and guilt he felt for what he had done. He'd told himself to never look back, to just keep going and he had, he'd accomplished what he'd set out to do. Now he couldn't seem to find anything to keep going for regardless of how he often acted. On the inside he was a complete wreck.

Al was happy, he had Winry and they were happy, they had a daughter together, they lived a happy, calm, safe life in Resembool and spent plenty of time in Rush Valley as well. Everyone around him had moved on and here he was stuck. He couldn't get rid of the memories, he couldn't escape them, the scars were pale on his skin, smoothed over by time but it was the scars that no one could see that were still raw, gaping wounds. Why was it that after all the shit he'd already been through and faced he couldn't just move on from the hell he'd been through in Rousia? Why couldn't he catch a break, why couldn't everyone stop asking so he could keep trying to let it fucking go?

"Edward," Mustang's voice held real concern and Ed blinked back the haze in his eyes and noticed Mustang had pulled over and they were still blocks from Gracia's house. He could feel his entire body shivering and the warmth of the tears on his face and he rubbed at them furiously, how could he be so weak as to cry in front of Mustang? Why the fuck was he crying now, he hadn't cried with any of his flings, hadn't cried when he'd finally told Ling some of what had happened to him in that damn country he'd been trapped in for two years. So why now, why the hell did something inside him want to trust Mustang?

"I'm fine," he winced at the hoarse, worn out, defeated sound of his voice and closed his eyes with a disgusted feeling directed at himself. He was lying, he always lied and told everyone he was fine but he couldn't summon the strength to do it now.

"I doubt that Edward, what's wrong?"

Everything . . . it's too fucking much . . . I'm too damn tired of fighting . . . I can't pick up the damn pieces and move on anymore . . . He wasn't aware he'd spoken his thoughts out loud, was surprised when a warm hand softly brushed his bangs from his face and then gripped his chin. His hands fell to his lap when a thumb brushed away a stray tear that had fallen from his eyes.

"Edward," the soft, concerned, even a bit weary, tone of Mustang's voice was something he'd never heard in the man's voice. It was so genuine that he raised his eyes to those pools of black and froze at seeing those same emotions in those obsidian orbs. They were such a dark blue and Ed knew they turned near black when he was angry or when he was truly watching him.

"I can't go back until I calm-"

A thumb brushed over his bottom lip and he paused in his words and leaned back putting some distance between them. He wasn't in any frame of mind for this to start between them now, damn Mustang's timing. Mustang seemed a bit hurt by that but leaned back into his seat none the less but his gaze still held Ed captive. Ed bit his lip and broke their locked gazes turning to look out the window again, he wished it would just go the fuck away and leave him alone. The encounter with those bastards in Xing had been the last straw, he'd thought he'd shoved all those memories down but then they'd showed up and brought them rushing to the surface.

He felt fucking trapped by them, as trapped as he'd felt for those two years. He couldn't escape them, couldn't find anything that would alleviate the way he'd felt there or any of the shit he'd had to fight just to live through. He'd been reduced to nothing more than the child he was, no alchemy, no amount of physical strength, no amount of spiteful, scathing, hateful words had done anything to help him, had only made it worse. He'd had to reduce himself to relying on primal instincts, had to dig himself out of there using scraps from a ruined artificial arm.

He could use a drink, even if the hangover was hell, getting drunk until he was so numb he didn't feel like he was back in that place gave him hope for a bit of relief. Mustang could just take him back to Gracia's and he'd walk to the bar and . . . no, he couldn't do that. Al and Winry would nag and worry and ask questions and Gracia would give him that disappointing look that reminded him of his mom. He sighed, what the hell was he supposed to do then? He couldn't ask Mustang to do him a favor and not take it personal if Ed asked him to help him forget. Ling had taken it personal even when Ed had told him not to, but he'd still done as Ed had asked of him.

Damn, what kind of adult was he? Relying on alcohol or sex to help shove down memories of shit he no longer had to deal with day to day. He was pathetic, he'd been an idiot kid, a arrogant teenager, and here he was a pathetic excuse for an adult. Ed let out a heavy sigh and then took a deep breath and forced his mind to shut the hell up. He calmed himself down forcefully and said in a remotely calm voice, "How about a ride to Nectar s?"

Mustang raised an eyebrow, "Why would you want to go there?"

"That's where Mikey and them go and it's better than going back to Miss Gracia's and worrying everyone when I can't even pull my self together."

"I wasn't joking when I said you were more than welcome to stay at my house if you wanted."

Ed was tempted but he knew he couldn't do that, if he and Mustang were going to have anything other than some affair or fling then it needed to start on level ground and when his head wasn't jumbled up and in pieces. "I know, I'll keep it in mind. Look, I can walk or whatever, but since we're already on the road-"

"No, I'll take you, you're on leave and don't have to be at work in the morning. I would feel better if I knew you made it there safely."

Ed nodded, "Yeah, thanks." The rest of the ride was silent and Ed saw Mustang's hesitation to drive off, his hand twitched on the steering wheel as though he wanted to grab him, stop him from going into the bar, but he just tightened his hand on the steering wheel. Ed was grateful for it, he didn't want Mustang to see him like this nor did he really want the man to question him at the moment. Right now he just wanted to forget it all and be around those he didn't have to worry about making mistakes around. Mustang leaving was a bit relieving because Ed was determined not to fuck anything up between them, he did value his friendship and the tenuous trust and respect that had developed between them, the something like friendship building was worth this parting of ways.

He needed to know Mustang could give him his space when he needed it and when Mustang drove away after several minutes of not really wanting to Ed thanked him silently for it. He turned and walked into the bar forcing a grin on his face at seeing Mikey, Breda, and Havoc tucked back in a corner already half way to wasted. The three shouted a greeting and ordered a drink and Ed flashed a grin at the bartender. The old man was heavy set and he was usually always here at this time of night, working from seven to two when the bar closed.

It was still early enough to get in a few hours of drinking and Ed made his way over to the table as Sal sent his barhop over to the table with his drink and refills for the guys already occupying the table. She was middle aged and happened to be Sal's daughter, brown, wavy hair tied back in a braid, brown eyes, broad shouldered. She was hardly a thin, pencil like girl, round curves, a womanly and motherly weight about her and she was friendly and motherly enough to cut anyone off when they'd had too much and strong and forceful enough if you stirred up any trouble.

"Hey there sugar, you look like you could use this," she greeted as she set the mug down in front of Ed. Ed nodded, "Yeah, thanks Mel."

"Of course darling', who was that lovely man that dropped you off?"

"Nobody," Ed said briskly before chugging the entire drink. She smiled and slid Mikey's drink over in front of Ed before Mikey could grab at it. She 'tsked' at Mikey's complaints and looked at Ed closely, "A nobody huh, so you don't mind if I say to hello to him then?"

Ed caught her teasing tone and smirked, "No, go right ahead."

She laughed and said to Mikey, "I'll get you another just hold your horses."

Mikey glared halfheartedly at Ed and said with only a slight slur to his voice, "You always manage to get all the luck, winning over Mel and Sal and you hardly have to do more than show up to get better service."

"I heard that Mikey, you keep talkin' smack and I'll spit in your beer."

"You better not Sal, I actually pay for my drinks."

"So, what you up to showin' up here so late anyway boss," Havoc asked around a cigarette.

"Al and Winry made me run errands and I ran into a friend."

"Ran into a friend but didn't stick around with 'im?"

"Yeah, the mood was kinda ruined. Don't you guys have to work tomorrow, it's only Thursday."

"So what, then it'll be Friday and we'll just be back here."

"Hawkeye's gonna kill you two," he looked to Mikey, "and Diane is going to kill you."

"Feh, woman's always trying to kill me anyway," Mikey muttered as Mel set down a drink in front of him. She set down another in front of Ed as he polished off the one from before as she stood there. Mel put her hand on Ed's shoulder, his right one, and instead of flinching as he would in his state of mind he just looked up at her grateful the alcohol was already dulling his senses. She smiled and said softly, "A lady was asking for you the other night."

"Damn boss, you do have all the luck," Havoc muttered as he worked on drowning in his beer.

Mel clicked her tongue at him irritably and looked back to Ed, "I told her you were a regular but you only came in mostly on weekends. She left an address for you but wouldn't leave a name."

Ed nodded, "Alright, thanks Mel," she slipped her hand into her apron and pulled out a folded up piece of paper. Ed took it with a smile and watched her walk back towards the bar to serve some other customers' their drinks. Ed debated opening the paper and looking at it but slipped it into his pocket instead. He would worry about it later, the way Mel had called whoever it was 'lady' meant it wasn t someone looking for a fling or a date with him so it could be something serious. He didn't want serious right now, he had enough of that to deal with already.

"Did you make a lot of friends in Xing man," Mikey asked casually.

Ed shrugged, "Yeah, more than you've made in your lifetime."

Breda and Havoc laughed and like that the four of them fell to taunts, teases, and drinking. Ed was able to forget about what was tormenting him for a least a few hours and when he finally stumbled out of the bar with the three of them Ed was at a loss as to where to go. He waved the three off when he decided to slink down beside the bar's entrance and just sit outside and stare at the stars. He knew it wasn't a good idea to fall asleep outside but as he let the haze of alcohol take hold he found he could care less. He didn't notice that Mel and Sal were surprised to see him sitting there, didn't stir when Sal had hoisted him over his shoulder and carried him around the building to the stairway leading to the apartment above the bar.

He'd grunted and rolled over onto his side when Sal threw him unceremoniously onto the couch. He'd burrowed into the blanket Mel had draped over him as she said to her father; "I hope one day he'll be able to escape those shadows chasing him everywhere he goes."

Sal had replied, "A man's got to face those shadows when he can't move forward anymore. He needs to find him someone to give him the strength to want to keep going or he'll be forever trapped in those chains," then he bid his daughter goodnight and went to his room as she made her way out of the apartment and down the street to her own where her husband and seven year old son lay sleeping. She would stay up to make sure they got up to go to school and work and then get some sleep but all the while her heart would go out to the young man asleep on her fathers' couch.

* * *

_A/N: This story does switch PoV's quite a lot, but I can assure everyone that most of the story is in Ed's PoV or Roy's. Mustang is as much a challenge to write as Hawkeye but I'll try my best. Thanks for reading and hoped you enjoyed.  
_


	6. Chapter Five

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: I don't have much to say this round other than enjoy, happy reading, and all that.  
_

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed **  
**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure **  
**Series: FMA **  
**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**  
**Status: Work In Progress **  
**Summary:** _Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed_

**Chapter 5**

It wasn't all that surprising that Mustang's phone rang during the early hours of the morning just before he had to go to work. He wasn't all that surprised that it was Al calling asking him if he knew where Ed was since he was the last person Al had seen Ed around. What he wasn't expecting was a phone call from someone named Sal, who Roy knew was the owner of the bar he'd taken Ed too, asking if he could come and take Ed off his hands.

Being a General did have its' advantages so a phone call let his staff know he would be running a bit late. He didn't think he deserved the cutting tone from Hawkeye since he was doing someone a favor. Well really it was his responsibility to make sure Ed made it back to his brother since he'd been foolish enough to agree to take him to the bar and drop him off to begin with. But what else was he supposed to do? Ed had been radiating waves that he didn't want to questioned or talk about anything and the only other option wasn't a great idea either.

He pulled the car in front of the bar to see Ed stumbling his way out of Sal's upstairs apartment with a weak smile and a wave. He looked like all he wanted to do was curl up in a corner and just go back to sleep but Mustang got out of the car and leaned his hip against the hood to watch him stagger down the stairs.

"That was a brilliant tactic Fullmetal."

Ed scowled and Mustang couldn't help but to remember that look from Ed's teenage years it looked just like all the other hateful, spiteful, haughty glares he'd been on the receiving end of for years.

"You are the last person that has any right to lecture me on drinking."

Mustang hadn't expected that one and it took him a few seconds to reply to it, "I'm certain that between the two of us at the moment I do have the right."

"Ha," Ed bit out without mirth, "know plenty about your bad habits bastard. Why the fuck are you here anyway, I can take care of myself."

Not that you should always have to, Mustang thought to himself but said, "Not very well from where I'm standing."

"Shut the fuck up. Shouldn't you be at work," Ed growled out as he finally made it all the way down the stairs. His hair was a mess and his clothes looked as worn out as the rest of him. But his glare was just as heated and alive as usual, "It's early enough I'll just get a room and you can get on with your life."

Mustang bristled at that inside but didn't let it show how much that hurt. He'd thought they had gotten somewhere, were working towards possibly becoming friends but Ed was shoving him away as usual like they hadn't talked for hours or as though that tension had not existed between them and it wasn't a pleasant feeling to be shoved away like that. Mustang schooled his features but he had a feeling Ed knew he'd struck a cord with that gaze boring into him like that.

"Al called and asked where you were, he's concerned about your disappearing act."

Ed tensed and let out a sigh, "Yeah . . . " he looked apologetic for a moment, "guess I should have at least checked in with him huh? I'll call him from the hotel when I get a room and let him know I'm fine."

Mustang was starting to truly detest those two words falling from Ed's mouth, 'I'm fine' was becoming a litany, an automatic response. Mustang knew that Al didn't believe those words anymore than he did and Ed's behavior since his return did not say 'I'm fine.'

"When are you going to stop trying to get away with that lie," Mustang voiced aloud before he could stop himself. It was as though Ed continuously snapped the strings of his control a little at a time. Every moment around him it only seemed to get harder and harder to keep himself under control.

"Who the hell asked you? Why am I standing here arguing with you anyway," Ed turned on his heel and headed up the street. Mustang paused a moment before he followed him. Ed noticed it right away and glowered over his shoulder at him to say, "Why the fuck are you following me?"

"Why are you always running away?"

Ed stopped then and whirled on him, fists clenched and body going taunt, he gritted his teeth before saying, "I'm not fucking running away. Maybe you didn't catch the hint, it's none of your fucking business what I do-"

"I thought you were supposed to be a genius Fullmetal. You think I would tolerate the abuse that comes out of your mouth if I didn't worry or care? You're a friend whether you consider me one is hardly relevant because I do care. I've spent years caring and that means that it is very much my business. Not what you do, you're an adult, but your well being matters to me."

"So damn suddenly it matters, what about all those times you sent me on those dangerous assignments? How about when you were pulling wool over our eyes and fucking lying to us? Did you care then? You're not my fucking father so how about you just uncurl your butt skirt and butt the fuck out of my life!"

"I would if you could show that you actually had some manner of control over your life. What are you doing exactly, drinking so much you couldn't leave the bar? What else are you going to do to escape and keep running away, go off to training in the North? Go back to Xing? You've been shoving all of us away for two years and plenty of us understood that but you can't run forever and it's not like you."

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" Ed's eyes glowed a bright gold with his anger and his teeth were bared in a snarl as his automail creaked beneath the strain of how tightly his fists were clenched. "What the hell makes you think you know me? You were always such an obsessive control freak you knew when and where I used to take a shit but that doesn't mean a damn. I'm nothing like who I used to be, I'm not a child and I'm sure as fucking hell not someone you can figure out."

"No, you may not be the same person anymore, people change, but you were never a coward-"

Mustang held his ground when Ed stepped forward and grabbed him by the collar to glare death at him, "I'm hardly a fucking coward. Stay the fuck away from me and live your own fucking life Mustang."

Ed released him shoving him back hard and Mustang moved instinctively, he seized both of Ed's wrists before he could turn away from him and glared back at him. He had never backed down from Ed and he wasn't going to let him intimidate him into doing so now. "It isn't going to work Edward, your anger never really worked before and it won't work now. I'm not blind, I can see that you're suffering and the longer you keep doing this, keeping it bottled up the more harm it's going to do."

Ed tugged on his wrists and his eyes narrowed dangerously but Mustang managed to keep hold of them somehow, maybe it was desperation to get through to Ed. How could he go from talking about some of it last night to being viciously distant overnight?

"Let me go."

"Why are you so set on keeping everyone away?"

"Let me the fuck go," Ed snarled and pulled his arms back again but Mustang still managed to hold onto his wrists.

"Answer the question."

"Let me the fuck go before I pound your damn face in," Ed growled in a dangerously low tone of voice.

Mustang didn't relent, "Answer me Edward."

"Go to hell Roy," Ed spit his name out and before Mustang could do more than gasp Ed had slammed his foot down on his own and then an elbow struck him sharply in the chest forcing him to bend over. Ed stepped back, "Maybe it's just not worth the fucking effort anymore. Takes less energy to shove you back than face that shit again," Ed's tone was dark, cold, and detached and while Mustang was left there catching his breath Ed turned and left him there.

Both of them froze immediately at the heart stopping sound of a gun being fired. Mustang moved without sparing any thought to the action, he lunged at Ed and tucked him to his frame as he hit the ground and rolled safely into the alleyway. Ed struggled and forced him to release him but before he could yell shots hit the corner of the wall they'd hidden behind. Ed and Mustang looked around them trying to pinpoint the shooter's location but more shots rained down on them. A cry was heard just along the street and Mustang had to grab Ed's wrist to keep him from rushing out to see if whoever had been hit was alright.

More shots were fired and they were forced back further into the small alleyway between the bar and the shop next to it. Screams were heard, mingling with the gunshots and Mustang's hands twitched to set fire to whoever was raining fire on anyone in their path. It was obvious the two of them were the targets as the shots centered on their location. Mustang's air left his lungs in a rush when he was suddenly, violently shoved back as more gunfire rained down and he noticed as he landed on his back that Ed must have heard that the shots were getting closer to finding their marks.

Ed's body jerked and he fell to one knee when one of the bullets found their mark in the only available flesh of his right shoulder, a hiss was all that passed through his lips before he snarled and turned from where he was. Blood soaked his shirt, vest, and jacket turning the white and khaki a dark crimson but he ignored it as he slammed his hands together and alchemy flared and cackled in the air. The alchemy surged through the ground and across the street slamming into a building and rocking it. People screamed from inside it and rushed out but another cry was heard along with haphazard gunshots that let them know Ed had found the guilty party.

Ed fell to his hands and knees and Mustang made to get to his feet but Ed snarled, "Don't move, that wasn't the only one. The angles were wrong," his voice was hoarse and rough, it obviously took a lot of effort for him to speak. He wanted to make sure he was alright, his skin was already growing pale and his breathing was ragged as he shook with the effort to remain as he was. The blood was dripping from his shirt in his position on his hands and knees to form a growing puddle on the ground.

When Ed let out a ragged cough and his body shook from the effort Mustang could hear the automail rattling and he ignored what Ed had said and carefully made his way towards him with one hand raised ready to set fire to any threats. He knelt down next to Ed who flinched when he pressed two fingers over his pulse. Ed's skin was feverish but cold and the way he was shaking wasn't uplifting, he needed medical attention and he needed it now.

He looked up at the sounds of more gunfire and immediately felt relief at the sound of Hawkeye and Havoc's voices shouting out orders. Even if they were possibly a few blocks away they were there, he made to let free a signal but one of Ed's shaky hands came up and gripped his hard stopping him while hissing, "Don't you'll give us away."

Mustang grimaced, he'd planned to do just that and hadn't Ed already done that with his show of alchemy. There was a rift in the street from where they were over to the building where the assassin used to be. More gunfire was heard and Mustang had a split second to respond when the shots were heard closer to them. He grabbed Ed by the waist and turned with him in his arms so that he could shield him. The air was knocked out of him when he slammed himself against the wall with Ed's added weight but it was better than being hit with bullets.

Ed let out a harsh breath and his hand shot up to his injured shoulder, he growled out under his breath, "Some warning next time." Mustang brushed off the comment, his senses on alert for anymore sounds and the echoing gunshots made both him and Ed tense but again he found relief to see Havoc standing there at the mouth of the alleyway. He lowered his gun and pressed his back against the alley wall as he eased his way to their side.

"What's up chief, boss?"

Mustang smirked and after Ed shifted he let him go only to have to catch him again when the blond stumbled to his hands and knees. Havoc wanted to holster the gun, Mustang could tell in the way his hand had twitched but he grimaced and looked back to the street. "Chief, how long has the boss been bleeding?"

"A few minutes, we need to get him to a hospital."

"Not an invalid," Ed growled between clenched teeth even as he bit back a cry of pain when he tried to move his right arm. Mustang carefully moved him so that he was sitting against the wall to which Ed hissed at him. So the bullet really had gone straight through, it was a good thing Miss Winry was still around since the bullet had gone through Ed's right arm. Ed had tried to keep pressure on the wound but he wasn't very successful and as Mustang finally had the chance to look there was a good amount of blood.

He knew the bare necessities about first aid, Havoc was the one with actual medical training but they didn't know if he or Ed were the targets so he couldn't take the gun from Havoc and let the man have a look at Ed's wound. When Hawkeye, Breda, Falman, and Herth appeared at the mouth of the alleyway Havoc turned, holstering his gun in the same movement and was kneeling in front of Ed in a second.

Ed grimaced and grinded his teeth looking away with closed eyes as Havoc pried his blood covered hand off the wound and Mustang stood and backed away giving him room to work. Havoc hissed in sympathy as he opened Ed's jacket and shirt so he could look at the wound. "Damn boss, they sure had good aim."

"No shit," Ed muttered. His left fist clenched tight when Havoc pressed a hand against the wound and when Ed shook Mustang could tell it was probably from the effort it took not to let out a sound and the fact that he could feel the wound in his back as well. Havoc made quick work of removing his jacket and shirt to make a make shift tourniquet and tossed his jacket back on after ripping his shirt up to try and apply pressure to the wound.

Mustang noticed that the blood had already stained Ed's skin and with how pale he was looking it made him feel even more worried. He looked to Hawkeye watching them as she turned to Herth and said, "Get the car ready, we need to get Edward to the hospital."

Herth was gone after that order and in seconds the car was heard, Havoc had Mustang help him get Ed to his feet, neither one of them were strong enough to carry him with the added weight of the automail. Ed was nearly dead weight on his feet and shortly after they had him in the car Ed had lost consciousness. Havoc had taken to riding in the front seat while Mustang was seated in the back with Ed lying across the seat, his head resting on Mustang's lap. He had to fight the urge to run his fingers through Ed's hair in a comforting gesture for both of them during the ride.

Hawkeye took a deep breath and let it out, she was not surprised that an attempt on the General's life was made but as she gathered facts and took in the damage as well as the number of assassins and some items on them she felt less and less sure that this was an attempt on the General's life. A single piece of paper written in code that she couldn't fully understand had a symbol on it she recognized well. It was the symbol Ed had worn on the back of his red trench coat during his adolescence that pointed her in the other direction.

Why would anyone wish to take Edward's life, and why do so shortly after he had returned from Xing. From what she knew Edward had made a good name for himself there as much as he had in Amestrius. Though, she knew that the release of information to the rest of the Amestrian military about the events leading to the Promised Day as well as the events of that day could very well make all of them enemies. But why? Why would anyone wish to claim Edwards' life when he had done so much good for the people as well as continued his service in the military for whatever reason he had?

Breda had managed to gather as much Intel as he could and was currently trying to break the code since it wasn't something alchemy related. Other than that single symbol nothing else had seemed alchemy related in the slightest. But whoever it was that was plotting the death of the Fullmetal Alchemist had to have known that anything put into an alchemical code would just be handed to said alchemist. Fullmetal was more than just a influential name in two countries, he was the best in the field when it came to alchemical codes, formulas, and just about anything no one else could begin to figure out.

"Colonel," Hawkeye looked to Breda who had a grim look on his face.

"What is it Lieutenant?"

"I figured out the code but intelligence as well as the M.P.'s are here."

"Thank you, I will handle them."

"Yes ma'am," Breda saluted and made to leave leaving the evidence where it was for intelligence and the Military Police to handle. Falman came up to her but she dismissed him as well. She told Falman to check in at the hospital and to be ready to get her up to speed when she arrived. He saluted and was gone while Hawkeye made herself ready to deal with the questions of the M.P.'s and Intelligence.

Herth paced along the floor of the waiting room, Ed had been in surgery for over two hours now. What the hell was taking so long, gunshots wounds could be dangerous and sure the kid had lost a lot of blood since the bullet did go straight through his shoulder and out of his back completely missing the automail plate . . . but it was taking too long. The General was still there, had changed into a cleaner uniform and Havoc had spoken to the doctors telling them of Ed's condition but then had left saying he needed to 'call the boss's brother and sister-in-law' to which the General look a bit guilty about.

The man should feel guilty in his opinion, he'd been there with him why the hell hadn't he made sure that Ed was unharmed? Why the hell hadn't he protected him? From what he knew the General was supposed to be protective and loyal to his men as much as they were of him and just because Ed was one of Holigan's guys now didn't mean shit. But as he calmed down and worry set in overwhelming his anger as it came to the third hour with nothing he sat down and took stock of what he had seen of the scene. Ed had obviously been shot while in the alleyway and Mustang had been shielding him when he arrived before Havoc took over and had a look at Ed's wound.

"Gentlemen?"

Herth looked up and got to his feet at seeing Al and Winry standing there, he had met them a handful of times and they both gave rather shaky smiles. Al shook Mustangs' hand greeting him as General while Winry did the same. Herth shook their hands and Al said something about it being unfortunate that they weren't meeting on more positive terms but they all feel silent quickly after that. Another twenty minutes then ten more ticked by before a tired looking doctor finally came over to them.

"The patient is stable, he lost a fair bit of blood and I'm afraid no one here is equip to tell whether the automail sustained any damage-"

"I am," Winry said as she got to her feet, "I'm his mechanic."

The doctor nodded, he was grey haired, average height and build and look a bit ragged but gave a brief smile, "That's fortunate. Luckily there were no fragments of the bullet as it did go straight through, unfortunately the bullet did shatter Mr. Elric's collar bone and the angle was a bit dangerous. He is very lucky with how close the bullet came to a major ligament in his spine."

"Can we see him?"

"Yes, but I'm afraid only family can be allowed to see him at this time. Miss, we would like you to let us know your professional opinion on the state of his automail."

"Of course, once I have a look at the damage I can determine whether its' best to remove it or not."

"Brother's not going to like it having to be removed Winry."

"Well he should try and not get shot then," Winry answered sharply but the concern was there in her voice and expression.

The doctor turned after a brief smile and led the way to Ed's room. Al promised to let them know how Ed was doing and Mustang got to his feet as he walked away. Herth let out a sigh and Mustang looked to him, "General Holigan may want to know Fullmetal's condition."

Herth nodded, "Yeah, guess I'll tell the old man."

"Major, I have to apologize for my lack of-"

"Don't worry about it sir. Elric is pretty tough and he's a magnet for trouble. As mere humans we can only do so much."

Mustang nodded but that guilt was still there and Herth couldn't help but to feel a bit of satisfaction in seeing that it still remained. He made to leave but Mustang stopped him by saying, "It would probably be best if we remained here to watch over Fullmetal until Hawkeye arrives with news on what occurred."

Herth nodded and he turned to head towards Ed's room Mustang following behind him. He did know that Ed trusted this man and that the Flame Alchemists was a good man despite what he did in Ishval but sometimes the mans' arrogance just got on his nerves and made him want to hit the guy. At other times the mans' control and how he never seemed to feel anything about anything made him want to scream at him. At least in Drachma he was used to it and the guys and the General herself let loose once in a while so that he knew they were human.

This guy, he was a enigma as much as Ed was, always guarded and distant, sometimes Ed's mask would slip but he would put it in place with a grin. Ed acted happy or angry or just bored as all hell and often said what was on his mind, he just never let anyone get close or see what lay beneath all those masks and that temper. He could live with that because Ed's defense was to act alive so no one worried about him. Mustang though, he was a damn wall of stone, sure he smirked and he acted friendly enough with any female he came across and with Ed's family but otherwise he was unreadable.

"Something on your mind Major?"

"Uh-No sir," Herth answered quickly. Mustang gave a short nod and pulled a chair over to where Mikey now noticed was Ed's room. He could hear Winry talking to Al and that doctor from inside the room and he pulled over a chair and sat down in it. Right now he could mull things over and needed to keep an eye out in case another attempt on whoever's lives had been at risk just hours ago. He did wonder what had been found at the scene and why he had a foreboding feeling about whatever news he'd hear.

Gracia could only hold the crying child in her arms as she tried to calm her. Edward was in the hospital and her parents had gone to see him but she had yet to receive a phone call in the four hours that they had been gone. Elysia sat next to her on the couch in silence as Anna continued to cry softly. Anna was curled in Gracia's lap, her arms wrapped around her neck, her head buried in Gracia's neck but she didn't mind the dampness or the trembling arms wrapped around her. She only held the child securely and ran her fingers through her soft, dark blond hair and spoke soft reassurances to her.

Since Edward's return she had been worried about how he was doing. She had worried about him while he was in Xing but it had occurred in her daily routine and now she had reasons to be concerned. The way that Roy had always kept himself distanced and never seemed to want to let anyone in had bothered her but she had seen the cracks in his mask when he was around Maes and then through the years with Elysia and herself and then with Anna once the child was born. She was not so blind so as not to see the look in his eyes or on his face when he spoke of Edward anymore than she was blind to the looks in Ed's eyes or on his face when he spoke of Mustang.

Two years ago, Ed had been a very secluded, guarded, and frightened young man and she could only begin to imagine what he had been through to bring someone as strong as Edward into feeling so insecure, alone, and afraid. It had hurt so terribly much to see him suffer and be unable to do anything to help him without doing even more damage. She regretted that she had felt a bit of relief when he had been given an assignment to Xing. Now he had appeared much more in control and much less afraid but she knew that just because he had smoothed over the wounds did not mean they were healed or no longer there.

Maes had a gift with people and learning things about them when they didn't wish to let him know, it was something he had told her he had picked up from Roy. She closed her eyes softly as Anna fell asleep in her arms having worn herself out with her crying. She kept hold of her as she let her mind drift, perhaps Roy could help Edward, the two of them had feelings for one another after all and they could probably help one another to have the strength to get past all that they endured and covered up with their masks.

She jumped a bit when the phone rang since it was sitting right next to her and wasn't surprised that Anna awoke in her arms instantly to the sound. She answered before it could ring for a third time and said, "Hues Residence."

"Hi Miss Gracia, it's Winry."

A few seconds passed as Gracia asked how Edward was doing.

"He is asleep and stable. I had to check his automail, which was undamaged but I had to remove the arm because some of the wires were shorted by the wound he has. He lost a lot of blood which is why he's still unconscious and his collar bone on his right side was shattered. He's lucky but he's going to be alright as long as he listens to the doctors."

Gracia let out a soft laugh and said that perhaps one of them should always be at the hospital to see to it that he does.

Winry laughed lightly, "Yes, I agree. The only way to get Ed to be co-operative with doctors is to have one of us here. How is Anna doing?"

Gracia's voice went a bit softer as she said Anna had just fallen into an exhausted sleep before she'd called. Winry took a deep breath, "Can I speak with her."

Gracia then said that of course she could and then Anna's voice came onto the line. Her childish voice was scratchy and she sniffed as she said hello and asked how Uncle Eddie was. Winry put a smile on her face hoping it would reach her voice as she spoke; "Hello Anna. Uncle Eddie is going to be alright, he has to stay in the hospital for a little while. Your daddy will be there soon, I'm going to stay here to make sure your Uncle Eddie listens to the doctors."

Anna asked is she had to stay to which Winry answered, "Yes, I do Anna. I'm sorry but I will be there in the morning once your daddy gets here tomorrow. I want you to be a good girl and listen to your daddy and Miss Gracia."

Anna sniffed and said to her that she would be good and listen. She added after a moment that she loved her and to tell Uncle Eddie she loved him and give him a kiss and goodnight wishes as well. Winry smiled as she replied, "I love you as well and I will tell Ed and pass along your kisses and goodnight wishes. Goodnight Marianna."

Anna blew a kiss through the phone to which Winry returned and then Gracia was on the phone once more. She asked if there was anything she could do. Winry told her that watching Anna was more than enough and then listened as Gracia told her to make sure and get some rest and let her know if she needed anything at all.

"Thank you Miss Gracia, Al should be there soon. He would rather stay but we both know Anna needs one of us there."

"Of course. Do take care and try to rest tonight." Gracia smiled as Winry bid her goodnight and told her the same. Gracia hung up the phone and shifted so that she could get to her feet. Elysia stood up as well and hugged her, Gracia ran her fingers through her daughters hair and kissed the top of her head before she adjusted Anna's weight in her arms. She had gone to get Elysia out of school early since she had found out that Edward had been sent to the hospital. The commotion in the city had sent many into a panic and it was tragic how many lives had been lost.

"Alphonse should be here in a little while according to Winry and then we can all start on making dinner."

Elysia nodded as she let her mother go and smiled at Anna, "Do you want to help make Uncle Ed a get well card?"

Anna nodded and finally released her hold of Gracia, she went to Elysia who was just big enough to carry the three year old. As the girls headed upstairs Gracia made her way to the kitchen to make some tea, she could use some after a day like today. As she stood over the stove she wondered to herself when the Elric's would possibly get a moment of true peace and what had brought about these heart wrenching course of events. While it was often times better to be kept in the dark she planned to find out just what was going on.

Gracia Hues was a patient woman and she often sought to find the good in everyone, but once upon a time a young State Alchemist had told her the truth of her husbands death. She had been both hurt and grateful for this and when all those she cared for were put at risk she couldn't help but to feel grateful that her daughter and her were no longer at risk even while she worried about them. But nearly four years ago now that same young man had gone missing and when he returned two years ago in a state that broke her heart she had hoped he would somehow be able to pick up the pieces on his own for she had been at a loss as to what she could do.

She had selfishly been grateful that he had left and she did not have to try and help him but here he was in trouble again. His life was nearly lost on this day and she wanted to know why. She missed Maes so very much that it hurt and nearly knocked the breath from her lungs when it was a time of a crisis. She longed to ask him for the answers or to just feel his arms around her to comfort her but all she felt was his absence and the loss of his warmth, around her waist, near her, through her, all around her until all she knew was him. She took a shaky, calming breath and was grateful for the phone ringing.

She was pulled from her thoughts and turned to answer the phone before it rang a fourth time. She felt a bit of relief when she was greeted with Roy on the phone asking if it was any trouble if he joined her for dinner. She told him it was no trouble at all and she would be delighted. He thanked her and told her he would be there promptly at seven since he was a bit behind with what had happened that morning.

She didn't fail to notice the strain to his voice or lack of actual emotion in it. She could only imagine how much the events of the day had taken a toll on him knowing that he felt strongly about Edward and had been there. As she hung up with him she thought that having Roy come over for dinner would be a good way of figuring some things out. She made her way back to the kitchen as the kettle started to whistle and thought on what she would make for dinner.

_

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A/N: Ah, I couldn't tell you where that came from other than this seems to have developed its own mind. Anyway, Ed will be fine because I am not even close to through with him. I'm going to leave it here because I plan to make Ed wake up and suffer in the next chapter and beware of time jumps, sometimes I get lazy and annoyed with writing day to day things so yeah there may be a few days have passed or a week or so but I won't try to make them too long of a time jump because there are things that everyone, I mean EVERYONE has to get through with each day and that. So yeah, enough of my rambling, hope you enjoyed, thanks for reading. _


	7. Chapter Six

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story was worked on in spurts, chapter 10 here, then chapter 2, then 4, then prologue, then 11, get the picture? So I decided to wait until I finished it to post it. I had other stories going on at the time anyway. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it none the less._

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed  
Genre: Drama, Action Adventure  
Series: FMA  
Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**  
**Status: Work In Progress  
Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**

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Chapter Six

_Waiting is but a test to our sanity in its never-ending helplessness to wait quickly._

Al hadn't known what to expect when he had first set foot in his brothers' hospital room, he had seen him bruised, battered, beaten, missing his automail arm, and he had seen him so sick and feverish he was delirious. But that was not enough for the moment just yesterday morning when he had seen his brother laying in a bed of white sheets covered with bulky white bandages stained red with blood and an I.V. in his left hand dripping much needed blood, pain medication, and antibiotics. He had not been prepared to see him so pale and listless in his comatose state. The bedding wasn't rumpled, his stomach wasn't covered by his hand, he wasn't lying on the bed as though he had tossed and turned all night, and there was no sign of the drool his brother was accustom to having when he slept.

Ed had just laid there, on his back, unmoving, with his left arm laying limply at his side and his chest moving up and down with a slight hitch that was probably subconscious because of the injury to his right shoulder and collar bone. Then the doctors words on how lucky Ed was to not be paralyzed or that his blood type was common enough that the blood loss had not turned too dangerous. The blood loss was so severe because of the nerves and veins that were stark through years of strain due to the automail and because the bullet had gone straight through.

Sure, Ed had still gone into shock and that had led him to this comatose state but after he and Winry gave the doctor his medical history as well as some of what they knew of what Ed had been through the doctor had said that it may be possible that Ed could stay asleep like that for even longer. Traumatic events sometimes led to depression and when injured the patient may wish to stay in a deep sleep so as to escape what they were put through.

When they said that the worst of it had occurred over two years ago the doctor had said that considering what he could gather and what he had received from military records given over by General Holigan early that morning that it would not be unlikely that Ed remained asleep for a while yet. It could be a delayed reaction to all that Ed had been through and right now the only thing any of them could do was wait.

It had only been close to forty eight hours since Ed had been admitted to the hospital and already Al was feeling how hard it was to wait. He had waited for two years, but that had been different because he had waited for letters, phone calls, and knew that Ed was alright thanks to Mai and Ling and Ran Fan keeping in touch. He knew how Ed was, knew when he had been reckless, he knew the fundamentals but never the details, never the truth of everything anymore than he ever had. His older brother had always kept things from him, tried to protect him and shoulder the brunt and blame for everything. Al understood that, would do the same for Ed if he could, but it still infuriated him.

He let out a long sigh and hung his head from where he sat in the hospital chair positioned on Ed's left side. He reached out and took his brothers' cold, limp hand in his own and brushed his thumbs over the knuckles, "I wish you would stop trying to hold everything in, you're always so stubborn. You can't keep going on like this just like the rest of us can't keep on worrying and getting nowhere . . . You can't escape it like this brother, it's not like you . . ." Al let the rest of his words die on his lips, his voice hitching with emotion that he just couldn't allow himself to release. He was determined to stay positive, after all, that had always been his role, to see the silver lining in everything even when the odds were stacked against them and everything pointed towards the opposite result.

The fight with Scar had been one of the first times they had both come so very close to dying and it had been a moment of painful revelation for Winry. Then there was that moment when they had not known where or how Ed was for three, long, agonizing months after his encounter with Kimblee. So many times both of them had brushed with death and walked away and Al would not believe that now was to be any different. Ed would wake up, he would the worst patient the hospital staff had ever seen, and things would go back to how they were.

Except, if things went back to how they were then he was left at square one. He would have to interrogate and question his stubborn, bull headed brother into telling him about what he had been through. Ed would refuse and they would argue and things would escalate until Al saw fit to put some space between them and then Ed would go back to being defensive, secretive, silently suffering alone because he wouldn't let anyone in, and Al wouldn't be able to reach him.

Al let out an exasperated sigh and closed his eyes saying softly, "I really wish you would stop thinking that telling those that care about what's going on with you as a burden. We can bare some of the weight right beside you brother." When minutes went by without any acknowledgment from Ed he let his mind drift to another matter on his mind.

Al knew that both General's and everyone else had held something back, had not told him everything. They had merely said that the assassination attempt yesterday morning had been directed for Ed instead of General Mustang. That was unsettling in itself. But was it really unexpected, plenty had voiced opinions about Ed because of his age and even though he was known as 'The People's Alchemist' that didn't mean he was without enemies.

Diane couldn't stifle the exasperated sigh as it escaped past her lips. This was indeed exhausting, a day at the office was tiring in itself but the waiting and pining and hoping was energy draining enough to make her not want to get through the rest of the day by the time lunch rolled around. Mikey was going through the day in a haze and she could understand why now that she had to make it through a day worrying over Ed. Mikey had known yesterday, had been there on the scene, had seen him injured and drove him and Mustang to the hospital. Ed's ex-superior officer had spoken to all of them after letting the old man know what was going on.

She had never seen the usually controlled and composed man looking so tired and worn out as he had yesterday when he finally made it to the office shortly after lunch. Then this morning he had come by to have Ed's medical files released since Holigan had the files as Ed's current superior officer. She longed to run her hands through her hair, to call it a day and go home but that was out of the question. She let out another sigh and Mikey grunted from his seat across from her.

She blinked and looked to those around her, not only had Mikey and Lee joined her for lunch but Mustang's team was also sitting at the table with her. Breda was next to Mikey with Havoc beside him and Falman and Lee seemed to be having some silent conversation. She wasn't surprised to see that Hawkeye was not present, she most likely had more than enough to do keeping General Mustang in line and there was also her impending transfer to the East and with that she also had to chose her team that would be going with her.

"Yo, Diane, you just gonna sit there and keep spacing out on us?"

She turned to glare at Mikey, "I'm not spacing out, it's called thinking you should try it some time."

"Bitch," Mikey muttered under his breath which got him a spoonful of what was left of whatever they had served her and expected her to eat for lunch. He licked what he could off his face and wiped the rest away before blowing a raspberry at her. She did nothing so childish back to him instead choosing to settle with a withering glare that made him smirk before he averted his gaze and turned to Havoc.

"So Jean, you think Ed will wake up soon?"

Jean shrugged, "I don't know, the boss has always had it pretty rough. I know if I were him I would stay asleep as long as I could."

Breda hummed around the sloppy Joe he was eating and Diane shuddered wondering how the man could possibly eat such messy food that was hardly food to begin with. Once he swallowed, since he did at least have the manners not to talk with his mouth full he said with a matter of fact tone; "There's no way the boss is going to stay asleep that long. We both know that he wouldn't leave Alphonse like that and besides, he has his niece and Miss Winry waiting on him and he's not about to let them down."

Jean nodded, "Yeah, I know all that as much as the rest of us. But you gotta about what the boss has been through that would make him want to stay in a coma. He came back in one hell of a state two years ago and then he actually accepted that mission-"

"It was an order not a request-" Diane added before Jean and Breda looked at her.

"Yeah, but he agreed anyway and then agreed to stay in Xing for two years," Jean added.

"That shows the boss was really just avoiding everyone, not that I wouldn't have done the same thing considering what he went through those two years. But we're all forgetting something."

"What's that?" Jean asked with genuine curiosity.

Breda smirked, "This is Ed we're talking about and we know how unpredictable the boss is on a daily basis."

Most of Mustang's command seated at the table nodded in agreement and flashes of grins that helped to relieve some of the worry passed between everyone for a small moment.

"Perhaps we should refrain from speaking of the Lieutenant Colonel's missions," Falman added monotonously.

Diane nodded, "I agree with Falman, Ed wouldn't appreciate it."

"The boss should be used to it; he's been a part of the family for a while now and just because he is part of another team doesn't mean he's no longer one of ours'." Breda added then finished off what was left on his tray. Havoc got to his feet and smiled at her, "Heymans' is right; Ed's always been a part of our family since the kid kicked in the door. Can't let a guy like him go."

Breda nodded and hummed as he was eating before he stood to take away his tray. Seemed as though lunch was over. Diane looked down at her half eaten food and her stomach gave a lurch at the idea of eating anything else. She couldn't help but feel a bit jealous by how well Mustang's team seemed to know Ed, they were obviously concerned but they had absolute faith Ed would get through this trial. She finished off her water and stood just as everyone else did, it was time to get back to the office and get back to working then she would probably stop by the hospital and pay Ed a visit.

Hawkeye narrowed her eyes at Mustang as she walked beside him through the halls of H.Q. as they made their way back to the Generals' office. They had just gone to the hospital to check on Al and see how Ed was doing and had managed to get in some lunch along the way. Everyone should be back at the office by now and the news was much the same, Ed was still deep asleep and very little had changed. They had still not worked out what was needed to be known in that coded message; Fuery was back at the office trying to figure it out thanks to Holigan handing it to Mustangs' team to work out.

The older General was busy keeping tabs on dealings in the city trying to pinpoint what group those assassins had been from and they had both agreed that Ed would have a constant guard outside his room. Once Edward woke up he would be transferred to the military hospital where they could better keep an eye on him. They only thing they knew for certain was that Edward was the target but they had yet to figure why and for what purpose assassins had been sent to claim his life. It was infuriating having to wait things out and not something Mustang was very talented at. Patience he knew, but waiting for the information he needed to formulate a plan of action was unnerving and aggravating.

She knew that this had to be aggravating and trying for the General on just a professional level. But she also knew that Mustang and Ed had long since crossed the line of being commander and subordinate years ago. She was not so blind as to have not seen the change between them, how it had changed from professional distance and grudgingly following orders and the tension between them was legendary. The two always fought and Ed barely followed any orders he was given, even now while under General Holigan's command his attitude towards orders was much the same. But Mustang and Ed had changed over the years, both had grown in different ways and thus the interaction between them had a change as well.

She had watched as rebelliousness and controlled anger that had never seemed very controlled turned to respect and how the General had slowly realized that Ed was no longer a child but someone who could truly keep up with him and one to be seen as an equal. It had gone from commanding officer to father figure to friend and now she had no idea where the two stood. She knew Ed was unlikely to accept friendship considering his standoffish-ness and defensive nature towards everyone presently, but it may very well be a possibility if the two could work out their differences.

Another element she had noticed that had made the decision for her in regards to what she would do once she could be given her own team. The attraction, the two of them often gave one another withering, heated glares and if not for some slips in their masks and how both of their eyes and expressions would flicker when the other was mentioned then that particular element between them would have been left undiscovered. She had noticed that such things had dimmed and were sufficiently covered in regards to Ed since his most recent return but she did not doubt that it still remained.

She had been a bit unnerved upon first discovering such a development but as she watched Mustang throughout these past two years she realized that perhaps it was something very much out of his control. She had spoken with Gracia, not knowing who else to bring such thoughts to and further noticed that Hues had noticed a change in the same direction, well he had said it was possible that it would go such a way, and that if nothing else someone that could actually get a reaction out of Roy that couldn't be fully hidden meant serious business. Gracia had said as much with a whimsical smile saying that Maes had found it quite funny at the time.

She had felt somewhat reassured by that but it wasn't until confirming her suspicious during a conversation with Alphonse that she truly felt that perhaps it was not something that most would conceive of a relationship between the General and Edward. Al had often hinted during conversations with Mustang that there were matters that only the older man could bring up with his brother and he had also hinted that it did not bother him as much. She knew that Al knew Ed much the same way that she knew Mustang having spent so much time around the two they were the most knowledgeable on their habits and expressions.

She had stumbled into a conversation with the younger Elric during his and Winry's wedding that had let her see things differently and realize that perhaps the Generals' feelings would not go on as a one-sided thing. She had yet to see anything that pointed in the direction of anything occurring but it had made her more able to see the possibilities of such a thing occurring.

"Colonel?"

She looked to the General who was watching her with a muted amount of concern and thoughtfulness and nodded in acknowledgment, "Sir?"

"I believe you were actually unusually lost in thought Hawkeye, perhaps you would care to share?"

"Not particularly sir. Perhaps it is best if we continued to the office, I do believe you still have a great deal of unfinished work that will need to be taken care of by the end of the day."  
"Colonel, as much as I will indefinitely miss you when you are reassigned must you continue to remind me of work I would rather not be doing?"

"I wouldn't want to break the routine while you and I are still within the vicinity of one another, sir."

She wanted to smirk at the sigh she got in return for her statement but refrained and like that she kept her attention on the things around her. It was not becoming to be caught off guard like that and she would leave her time at home for getting lost in the thoughts that circled within her mind. She would have plenty of time to think on such matters when an event occurred to bring such thoughts to the surface.

He wanted the ringing to stop, it was incessant and annoying for one and for another it was persistent in its attempt to pull him out of the numbness he would prefer to just stay locked in. But the ringing kept building and growing louder until it turned into a constant beeping noise and more sounds came to him making his head buzz from the onslaught on his eardrums. With the sounds came sensation and feeling and that was even less pleasant and made him want to return to the numbness and emptiness he'd been present in before.

But then pain wanted to make itself known and he felt it seize him so thoroughly he could no longer reach for that abyss. Pain seemed to ricochet through his bones and veins until it felt like fire was licking at his skin. But the pressure on his shoulder was much more intense and when he tried to move, to shift that weight off agony lanced through his chest until he was blinded by it. He wanted to arch away from the wretchedness of it, to escape the possibly barbed wires wrapping around his chest and his shoulder but he found he couldn't.

Sounds were deafening around him as shouts and alarms and whatever the hell else that damn blaring noise was erupted around him. He twisted subconsciously not really in control of what his body was doing just going with primal instinct to escape the source of his torment but when he found that he no longer could try to escape it he felt his throat burn as though he'd been screaming and then a brief prick and he thankfully felt a soothing warmth curl through his veins and ease the torture he was in. His limbs fell limp and while he should feel vulnerable and defenseless at the sensation all he could feel at the moment was gratitude for the momentary reprieve.

Winry was a bit stunned and felt detached as she helped the nurses and doctors reposition Ed on his bed. She had arrived to see how Al was doing and if he needed anything to find Ed crying out in hoarse screams that he most likely wasn't aware he was letting out and thrashing violently against some invisible foe. She knew in those few horrifying moments that there was much more than just physical ailments going on with Ed. Nightmares could sometimes manifest themselves into physical pains and spasms if they were traumatic enough.

If Ed was indeed in a coma that was due to more emotional and mental torments than the shock on his body from the injuries and the blood loss and how painful that had to be then it could very well be that he was developing complications in trying to wake up. It may very well be plausible that Ed wanted nothing more than to stay in the unawareness of his deep sleep. He was stubborn and his will was strong she knew that much from growing up with him and seeing his determination and devotion. Only two days in the hospital and he was showing signs of regaining consciousness despite what any of them seemed to think.

She looked to Al finally once Ed's face and body relaxed to see that he was much less shaken and shocked and seemed a bit more optimistic than before. Ed was fighting against the medical staff and while he had not fully woken up and the way in which he had finally given them a sign that he was still in there somewhere had been terrifying and heart wrenching it was still a sign. Al would not be deterred no matter what in believing that his brother would wake up and that was something she was grateful for.

The small smile fell from her lips however when her medical training and knowledge came in to cast shadows over the hopeful look in Al's eyes that managed to shoot straight to her heart. After this particular episode it may very well take even longer for Ed to find his way back to the waking world. He may become subconsciously fearful to return to awareness after the way in which he was greeted by it this time. She would need to speak with the doctors and see what they could do about helping to ease the pain Edward was in while not keeping him on anything that had a sedative effect.

She made to do just that when the doctor suddenly broke through her thoughts and cut through the silence.

"Lieutenant Colonel Elric is quite a strong young man. Usually once a patient loses consciousness due to shock they tend to stay asleep for at least three days. This attack that he just had signifies that he may very well be close to regaining consciousness." The doctor turned to regard Alphonse who was giving him a soft smile.

"I would like to give the Lieutenant Colonel a different kind of pain medication that has less of a sedative effect on the body. However, the medication does have side effects that may slow down the process of recovery."

"You're talking about that new drug that was just developed," Winry said with a slight glare and bite to her words.

The doctor nodded, "Yes. It may decrease his appetite, give him headaches, and make him feel less coordinated when he awakens but it will decrease the pain he is in and has less of a sedating effect."

"Why would it make him less coordinated if it has less of a sedative effect," Al asked with concern.

"That's because that is part of how it works as a pain medication. It helps to ease the tension in the muscles and nerves and dulls the strength of the pain receptors in the body. It's useful to the general medical professionals but it would not be something Automail surgeons would use."

"Indeed not. Which is why it may very well slow down the process of Lieutenant Colonel Elric's healing. It will take time for the drug to ware off and leave him with all of his reflexes and full nerve and muscle capacity. One dosage of ten milligrams takes up to twelve hours to wear off."

"Will it help my brother wake up?"

"Yes, I believe it will."

"Then I'm fine with that. Twelve hours isn't long and if his coordination is a bit less then that makes it less likely he'll try to run off when he does wake up. The side effects may be more of a help than a hindrance since brother is so stubborn."

"Yes, I've heard that the Lieutenant Colonel is not an easy patient to manage."

Winry and Al both nodded their agreement while Winry got a look from Al for having to muffle a scoff of indignation from her thoughts of how difficult a patient Edward Elric is. With a nod the doctor and nurse left the room and a few minutes of silence went by before the nurse came back in to say that Ed would be do for more pain medication in eight hours and they would give him the new medication at that time.

It was going to be another long day and a longer night. Winry left Al to watch over Ed while she went to the cafeteria located on the first floor to get them both something to eat. She knew that tonight Al was going to be left by himself and she would much rather remain at the hospital but she couldn't think of leaving Anna alone when she was so upset and worried. Gracia and Elysia were doing all they could to console her and keep her mind off of things but she was in no shape to be without Al or Winry for an entire night let alone for however long Ed would be hospitalized.

As she walked into the nearly empty cafeteria a frown graced her features as she thought about how much Ed had and still was worrying everyone. It wasn't just because of the numerous trips to the hospital, though right now that was it, but also his distance towards everyone. It was as though Ed didn't trust any of them and while that hurt she was angrier with him over it now than she had been two years ago. She would never begin to understand what the years searching for the stone had been like no matter how many times Al explained it all to her. She knew that she would never understand what Ed had been through in that other country where he was held captive and prisoner.

But two years in Xing, he had two years to rebuild his walls with his time away and he had somehow found the strength to start living his life and making friends among other things. Yet, he still remained distant, guarded, untrusting, and unwilling to change that. In fact, she'd heard from Riza that Ed may be thinking of undergoing his mandatory training in Drachma. Ed planned to run away from them all yet again. She was tired of it. Ed wasn't doing himself any good by keeping everything bottled up and it hurt her that he wouldn't trust her. It angered her beyond any of the other stupid things Ed had done that he continued to do this and how it was obviously hurting Al so very much. Ed's long list of idiotic things had usually involved Al somehow and Al was usually the one to keep Ed from getting himself killed.

Now Ed wasn't sharing anything with Al and half the time they seemed to be forcing themselves to get along and keep quiet about what was really bothering them. It was infuriating to watch Al hurting because Ed wouldn't let him in on what was going on, wouldn't involve anyone in his life and kept everything bottled up inside. She hated seeing Ed withdraw from Al and then to see Al so hesitant and nervous to talk to his brother.

"Winry Rockbell Elric?"

Winry turned at the sound of her name to see a beautiful woman that made Winry feel like she was staring at royalty. She was a relatively older woman and her eyes were about as unique in their crystalline blue as Ed's golden eyes were. She had fair, smooth skin and long, dazzling, golden blond hair that was tied back at the base of her neck and braided along her back. Winry had this uncanny feeling that she should recognize this woman for some reason even though she was sure she'd never met her before.

"Um yes, and who are you?"

The woman's lips curved into a gentle smile that despite the apparent warmth that should be present in such a soft expression made the hair on the back of Winry's neck stand on end. She unconsciously stepped back with the bag of gathered food she'd thoughtlessly gathered held tightly in her right hand.

"I'm an old friend of Edward's. I'm surprised that he hasn't told anyone about me. Miss Susami would be perfectly fine young lady. "

"No, I don't believe he has. It's nice to make your acquaintance Miss Susami," while Winry would love to find out anything about Ed he wasn't telling them she felt uneasy around this woman. There were warning bells going off in her head telling her to get away, to run, and she intended to get back to Al rather than have a chat with this strange, mysterious, and dangerous woman that had appeared out of nowhere and somehow knew who she was. That made Winry's blood chill at the thought, she said she knew Ed and she'd called her by her full name without having seen her face.

"But I really should be going now. Maybe we will run into one another some other time."

"Of course my dear, indeed we shall. Do give my regards and get well wishes to Edward for me," the woman said with a pleasant smiled before turning on her heel and heading away. Winry stared in shock, how the hell? What had just happened and why was it that while the woman was leaving she still couldn't dispel the daunting aura that something awful was going to come of having crossed paths with that strange woman.

She blinked herself out of her daze and made her way back to Ed's hospital room. She could ask Ed about it when he finally decided to wake up and grace them with her presence. When Ed did wake up she was going to give that brat a piece of her mind, it was time he stopped hurting Al by keeping secrets and they had a right to know about anyone threatening that had made themselves a factor in his life so they wouldn't be caught unaware and unprepared like she had just found herself.

Mustang looked to the clock hanging on the wall above the filing cabinets located against the wall next to the bookshelf in his office. It was already seven o'clock at night and he still had at least twenty more files to go through. Hawkeye has taken residence at the now empty desk of Havoc's. She had explained that she had a few last minute things she needed to sort through before she left for her transfer to the East the following Monday. He could guess that she was really keeping an eye on him and wondered about that.

What was the reason she could possibly have to want to keep and eye on him more closely than usual at the moment? Did it have to do with Ed being in the hospital? Was there some other matter on her mind? He knew Hawkeye both as a friend and colleague but the woman was an enigma to him all the same. He couldn't begin to narrow down the hundreds of thoughts that could be circling through her sharp mind at the moment. Perhaps she was going to miss everyone as much as they would miss her and so she wanted to spend some time with them all before she left.

He set back to going through the last of the days' paperwork when his mind suddenly came to a halt at a note attached to the last of the files. Havoc had written something down that the man had obviously been nervous about telling Mustang about. While their investigation had not meant the rest of the work could go unattended, one of the reasons he was still here while it was getting close to nine o'clock now that he had only this last file to read, he had many other things on his mind. He'd received the phone call from Al about Ed's condition and the doctor's idea to help him regain consciousness as well as the change in Ed's medication.

Holigan had called to get an update assuming the younger brother would call Mustang and he'd told the older General what he was told and that they still had yet to break that code from the slip of paper found in one of the assassins pockets. But here was yet another clue and why in the hell had Havoc felt the need to be so damn sneaky about it, unless it wasn't Havoc that had attached the scrap of paper to the folder to begin with. It wasn't Havoc's handwriting; in fact it didn't look like it was any of his mens' handwriting he'd just assumed Havoc had left the note because Havoc was the one that sorted through the files he had to go through.

He looked at the paper closely; it looked folded up and wrinkled like someone had shoved it in their pocket absentmindedly. Not only that but the handwriting looked feminine as well. He swore that he should recognize it but couldn't quite pinpoint whose handwriting it could possibly be. He smoothed out the slip of paper and set it aside on his desk setting a few of the files he'd already gone through on top of it and quickly and distractingly read through the last file.

He was merely scanning through the file until something caught his attention. This file was about reports in the East and North regarding a mysterious serial killer. This person has yet to be identified and their appearance and objective is unknown. This was more than a file it was an assignment, which he fully realized by the end of the report. The last reports on these serial killers actions were reported in Central. Five dead, all of them seemingly dropping dead of unknown causes. No weapon found, no fingerprints, no sign of a struggle. They were merely found dead and reports stated that it appeared as though the life had been sucked right out of them.

He flipped to the back of the file where there were pictures of the scene and the victims. Each of them were in the same state, pale to the point where it looked like the life was stripped of them. There was a look of shock to their expressions but no signs of a struggled and some of the victims even had their eyes closed in bliss. Why was this the first time he'd heard of this? Why hadn't he been informed something like this was going on and why was he being informed now?

As he looked at the scene of the crimes he noticed something that had been noted early on in the report that he's skimmed across and hadn't paid much attention to. There was some kind of alchemy circle somewhere on the scene in every single picture. So this serial killer was after alchemists and was someone draining their life forces. What did that scrap of paper have to do with this?

He glanced at the paper and remembered who the handwriting belonged to, Mel from Nectar s. He recognized it now from all the times she had passed on messages to him from women that had come in asking for him. All his contacts used to pass messages to him from there because they knew it was a relatively safe bar and Mel and Sal were honest people. He stood up and snatched the piece of paper to thrust it in his pocket. It was a Saturday night and usually he would be at home on this day but this investigation and the pile up of paperwork had made it so he had to work this weekend.

He grabbed his coat and glanced at Hawkeye who was standing up as he exited his office and looked at him attentively.

"Sir?"

"Would you mind accompanying me, I think I may have an idea on who instigated that attack on Fullmetal."

"Sir," was her sharp reply before she was moving to grab her own coat and follow him out of the office. He paused for a moment in the hallway as she closed and locked any files away and turned off the lights. While he would rather rush to try and get answers she was thinking safety and security and it reminded him of how much he was going to miss her thoughtfulness and how she never failed to follow protocol. Hopefully Havoc would never falter in being just as capable as Hawkeye.

She was closing the door and locking it with a sound click in a matter of seconds and together they set off down the hallway and out of the building. She waited with patient silence until they were in the car to ask.

"Sir, what is it?"

"I came across a file regarding a serial killer investigation that started up North, went to the East and has made its' way here." He went through the facts that he'd noticed but had merely scanned over as the report stood out more so in his mind. This being able to pick out details and put them together even when he'd only half paid attention to the information was something Hues had been annoyed with him about.

"The times of the attacks in each location have been stretched out over the course of the last six months. The incidents in the North occurred first before they moved to the East. The moved to Central at the same time that Fullmetal returned and there have already been five deaths on the north end of the city. They have steadily been moving closer and closer to this location."

He adjusted his hand on the steering wheel and dug out the piece of paper he'd found attached to the folder, "I found this attached to that file. That is Mel's handwriting and its' obviously been shoved into someone s pocket. I wanted to go and ask if that was a message to Ed or not."

"Sir, do you think-"

"I do. I know its' not a completely rational thought at the moment but Ed would be the most likely target considering the similarities between all the victims."

"They are all alchemists," Riza commented softly and when Mustang nodded she grimaced.

"That is more than enough reason to draw my conclusion. Fullmetal is known to be powerful and sharp minded. He has steadily been building more of a reputation for himself since he decided to remain in the military and his influence in Xing has only raised his number of supporters."

"And it very well could have also raised the number of enemies he has," Hawkeye said thoughtfully.

"Exactly. That attack was deliberate and planned out and while the two may not be completely related I feel as though they are somehow related. The wound Ed suffered could have well been deliberate, they possibly didn't want to kill him, only to immobilize and weaken him. These last two days Ed has been heavily guarded because we thought it was an assassination attempt. It's a good thing he is guarded now but if this serial killer is somehow involved it is only going to make this that much more complicated."

He knew he didn't have to tell her all of this, she could think up all the factors and additional complications on her own. But he needed to say it so he could work out his racing thoughts. He slowed down and pulled the car up to the curb in front of Nectar s and got out after making sure no traffic was coming his way. Hawkeye followed him and waited on the sidewalk for him to come around to her and walk up to the door and open it for her.

Mustang ignored his men and the drunken greetings he received from them, he noticed Hawkeye give them all disapproving looks before she followed him over to the bar where Sal was busy making a few mixed drinks and filling tumblers. He frowned at the sight of him but Mustang brushed the look off, Sal was never very friendly to begin with. Mustang waited until the man addressed him with his usual brisk greeting and his question of, "What do you want?"

Mustang nodded politely to him in greeting and said, "Nothing tonight Sal, I needed to have a word with Mel if you could spare her a moment."

"I've fought long and hard to keep my daughter far away from you. You showed up the other night droppin' the brat off and she starts askin' 'bout you and then you show up askin' for a word 'ith 'er."

"This is official business sir," Hawkeye said sharply and Sal looked to her with a glower to which she continued to look at him coolly. Mustang smirked; it would take a lot more than anything Sal could throw to shake or move Hawkeye in the slightest.

"I'd rather this woman here speak with my daughter in regards to your official business."

"That's fine, where is she," Hawkeye replied without missing a beat.

Sal huffed and motioned back towards the table where Mustang had noticed his men seated at. Mel was standing next to the table laughing and talking with them with a tray resting against her hip. Hawkeye turned sharply and made her way over to the woman. The men at the table fell silent immediately when they noticed her presence. Mustang turned back to Sal who was busy cleaning glasses behind the bar.

Sal noticed that he was being watched and let out a rough sound before he turned to Mustang, "Haven't seen you 'round these parts in a while. Heard somethin' happened to the kid, he doin' alright?"

"He will be in time. How long has he been a regular here?"

"Since before he disappeared for those two years."

"Didn't you think he was too young back then?"

"Course I did, brat has a temper though and he blew a gasket when I tried to kick 'im out. Those boys there are regulars and they brought him in." He motioned to Mustangs' men and Mustang nodded. He had figured that much, Havoc and Breda were often dragging everyone into trouble. Fuery and Falman's presence was enough of a testament to that. He looked back to Hawkeye speaking with Sal and noticed how everyone at the table was paying rapt attention to what the two were saying. At least that saved him the trouble of explaining why they had to report to work the following morning.

"Kids' had it rough for someone 'is age."

Mustang turned his attention back to Sal, "Yes he has. How much do you know about how rough he's had it?"

"Near to nothin' kids' more of a man than most. I've had customers come in here complaining about this and that. 'Cept those soldier boys, they are always cracking up and laughing most the time. Brats' as tight lipped as any experienced soldier, can see the shadows hauntin' 'im but he don't complain 'bout any of it. Even the times he's had to be carried to my loft he just up and leaves when he wakes up."

"My sincere gratitude to you for looking after him at those times."

"Someone ought to, besides he means the world to my daughter and I'm not about to break her heart."

"Do you think maybe he might have confided some things in Mel?"

"He might of, but that's their business and I don't want you near my daughter-"

"Oh behave yourself," Mel's voice carried to them and Mustang looked up to see Hawkeye and Mel making their way to them.

Mel smiled warmly at him and Mustang returned the smile just as warmly. She winked at him and turned a glower to her father for a moment before looking at him warmly once more, "It's a pleasure to finally meet who Edward regularly calls 'the bastard'." She said the last bit with a laugh and Mustang smirked, "Yes it would seem most of those acquainted with Edward come to know me by such an unfavorable light."

"My, you are as smooth of a talker as Ed says you are. The woman, who left the note, as I was telling Miss Hawkeye here, has been coming in often. She is usually here during the week even though I told her Ed generally only shows up on weekends. There was that one rare Thursday but I believe he's on leave from what the boys say."

Mustang nodded, "That's right, though at the moment his vacation time is spent in the hospital."

"So I heard, I was really very worried at first and that whole incident was frightening, we are still making repairs from that terror. I'm sure that he will be just fine though, he's a very strong young man."

Mustang nodded and stood, "I'm confident myself since I've had many dealings with Edward."

"Oh, I know that as well. Ed has been coming here since he was just old enough to drink. I know who you are General Mustang and that you were once Edward's C.O. This is why I wasn t surprised to see you here or dropping Ed off the other night. Give my regards to Ed and tell him to stop by and visit us sometime when he gets better."

"I will thank you for your help and cooperation."

"No matter, anything I can do to help you catch the people that hurt Edward."

He and Hawkeye made their way out of the bar and once they had climbed in the car and were on the road once more Hawkeye broke the silence.

"According to Miss Melanie, the woman still hasn't said her name and she only left an address," as Mustang knew this from the note already Hawkeye continued. "She was described as an upper class woman, a proper woman who held herself in such a way. When she does come to Nectars' she only drinks warm tea, never any alcohol. Miss Melanie stated that she has seen her outside of Nectar s on several occasions, at the cafe or the supermarket and on the street. There was something about the way she was described and how she carried herself that leaves me suspicious sir."

Mustang glanced at her then turned back to the road, "What is it Colonel?"

"When Melanie was talking about her she seemed hesitant and almost fearful to speak of her as though the woman unsettled her."

"Then this mystery woman that has been looking for Ed is definitely someone to watch out for. What bothers me is that even though she was told Ed frequents on weekends she usually shows up during the week. Why do you think that is?"

"Perhaps she is gathering information sir."

"I was thinking the same; Miss Melanie didn't seem very reluctant to share what she knew about Edward to me. She seems like the type of person that is kind and warm to everyone and often hears gossip and rumors because of her personality. It wouldn't be unwise to speak with her to try and gather intelligence about anyone."

"The men said that they have never seen the woman Melanie was speaking of. We both know that they are regulars and they have never laid eyes on this woman. I find that to be deliberate."

"I have to agree with you, this woman seems to be only willing to be there when she knows neither her target nor those who work with Ed are present."

He turned down a street and started to head towards Hawkeye s' apartment, Riza looked askance at him.

"The description was rather striking sir, it was said that she has fair skin, long blond hair and crystalline blue eyes."

"That is indeed striking and very unique. It may make our job to locate her that much easier."

"Perhaps, but I have a feeling that finding her will be the least of our worries sir."

Mustang did glance at her then and slowed down, "Why is that?"

He turned his gaze back to the road and noticed why Hawkeye had said as such when he caught a glimpse of a woman wearing a blue cloak watching them from the empty walkway to his left. He stopped the car and put it in park as Hawkeye upholstered her gun and got out of the car. The woman raised her hands to the hood of her cloak and removed it revealing the very description Hawkeye had just given him. He unbuckled his seat-belt and got quickly out of the car.

The woman smiled at him and addressed him in a musical voice, "So nice to finally meet your acquaintance Flame Alchemist, Roy Mustang."

He faltered for a moment wondering at how the woman knew his name and title but it wasn't long enough to be truly noticed. He raised his right hand poised to snap and addressed her coldly, "Who are you?"

"Indeed, where are my manners? I will honor you with the knowledge of my first and last name. I am Quendalyn Susami; you could say I'm an old friend of Edward's as I told his childhood friend at the hospital."

Wait, when had this woman been to the hospital and how was it she had gone anywhere near anyone present at the hospital for Ed when he still had a guard there? He would have to find out how that had occurred later on, now he needed to concentrate on the immediate threat. He didn't move and knew that for some reason if he did it would be an idiotic maneuver on his part. Hawkeye had her gun aimed at the woman and while he kept his hand poised he noticed that this Quendalyn did not seem the least bit worried or fazed by the threat. He couldn't help but to think that perhaps this woman did not view them as anything more than ants, much like the humunculi.

He would have to pay attention and watch for any markings that would identify her as such as well as abilities. She was obviously dangerous if she felt so confident in her strength despite the odds against her. Those who were confident often underestimated their opponents and she had already given her name, if it was indeed her real name, maybe he could coax more information from her.

"What is it your after?"

"That is a wise question. However, I'm afraid that now is not the appropriate time for it to be answered. I merely wished to introduce myself."

"Don't move," he barked at her but she smirked at his command as though she thought he were some child trying to tell an adult what to do.

"I daresay that you do not possess the power to stop me Roy Mustang. I highly doubt that the woman accompanying you will miss but would you like to see what would happen if she were to fire that firearm she has so readily aimed at me?"

"Are you a homunculus, is that why you don't seem worried about a few bullets?"

"Oh no dear, I'm insulted. I am no homunculus, I assure you. I am merely much more than human. Besides, if you were to try and kill me you are likely to never get the answers in which you seek."

"It won't matter if you're dead."

"I do believe it will continue to matter regardless if I'm alive or dead," her voice had a hint of humor and challenge in it as she spoke. She slowly raised her hands above her head reaching towards the sky an as it was a universal sign of surrender from most people Hawkeye did not fire yet. But Mustang tensed all the same feeling a change in the air, it felt like electricity was beginning to rise in the atmosphere and when the energy began to climb to something dangerous he moved without thought and spun around to grab Hawkeye. Just as he managed to grab her around the waist and push the both of them away from the road and the car a bolt of lightning shot from the sky to land where the two of them had just stood.

Mustang jumped to his feet moments after that had happened and searched for the woman only to find her gone. He looked all around but couldn't find her anywhere. Hawkeye got to her feet quickly and scanned the area for threats when she found nothing to be found only then did she holster her weapon, brush herself off and look at him questionably.

"I don't know what that was; alchemists can generally feel the work of alchemy in the air."

"So she's an alchemist?"

Mustang shook his head, no, she was no alchemist. Every alchemist needed circles or some way to concentrate their alchemy like how Ed clapped his hands. Except that homunculus 'Father' had not needed a focal point in order to use alchemy. But this energy, the energy that had caused that bolt of lightning to come down from the sky, that had not been alchemy, it was too foreign, too heated and strange to be alchemy. Even Ed's alchemy or Al's had a certain scent and feel to it that defined it as alchemy. What that woman had done was not alchemy, so, then what the hell was it?

He snapped and tried to extinguish the flames from what was left of the car but his attempt to extinguish them only made them grow stronger and he had to step back away from the rubble before he was burned. Hawkeye watched the blue flames consume the car wearily having seen his attempt to extinguish them. He had obviously confirmed his own thoughts and caused hers' to go in the same direction with that action. This woman was dangerous, arrogant, and powerful and he doubted that knowing her name and what she looked like would mean much of anything. How had she done such a thing and what was it she was after?

_

* * *

_

A/N: Well now, what an interesting turn of events. I do know that drug the doctor was talking about I just couldn't think of the name of it. I've enough medical jargon stuck in my head you'd think I would remember it all but alas my memory cannot keep everything on hand. So, not alchemy, an antagonist is introduced and it seems that Ed may well be on the road to recovery. Poor Mustang and co' having to work on weekends and then the car gets blown up. Wonder how the two will get home. Anyway, things are starting to pick up a bit more and damn is this chapter ever long, the last one was a bit short but the length of this one is my usual. It was going to be a bit shorter but the story ran away with me. It's liberating writing a story that isn't really planned out and that starts on a whim and is written a bit out of coordination. Ah hell, I need to get some sleep, work tomorrow, and well it's damn near four in the morning. Thanks for reading.


	8. Chapter Seven

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story was worked on in spurts, chapter 10 here, then chapter 2, then 4, then prologue, then 11, get the picture? So I decided to wait until I finished it to post it. I had other stories going on at the time anyway. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it none the less._

_**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**_  
_**Pairing: Roy/Ed **_  
_**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure **_  
_**Series: FMA **_  
_**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**_  
_**Status: Work In Progress **_  
_**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**_

**Chapter 7**

_The origin of the mystery is but a mystery that shall lead to the greatest of treasures._

General Holigan ran a hand through his gray hair with a tired sigh. Edward Elric was indeed a handful for any commanding officer. Two years in Xing with damage reports at least once a week and none of them small damage reports, an attempt on his life shortly after his return, and now Mustang and his command were giving his team information that would help them figure out who exactly was after the Fullmetal Alchemists' life. But now, as he read through what Mustang had sent to him in regards to who he and his team believed to be the one behind the attack as well as a series of murders throughout Amestrius he couldn't help but to feel a headache coming on.

For some reason reading the name made him think immediately of the psychologists they had on staff. There were differences, hair length, hair color, eye color, but how easy was it to change all of that? A wig and contacts were simple and cheap enough to get a hold of. Better yet, if they were one and the same then why would a psychologist want to kill Fullmetal? From what he knew Ed had never truly offended anyone or done anyone any wrong that were still alive. He had enemies but most of them were long since gone killed, during the uprising on what was called the Promised Day.

He was no fool as to believe that soldiers and officers alike did not dislike Fullmetal as much as they disliked Mustang and his staff, but that was common and usual. Their ages and their climbs through the ranks would anger most in the military out of jealousy. Even as he tried to think of other potential suspects he kept being drawn back to this woman, Susami, he was certain that Susami and Dr. Susami were one in the same but he would need to provide evidence to prove as such. The doctor was well protected by the military for her services and ability to help any and all patients recover and continue on with their lives. The higher ups would not care much if she were more than she seemed and would most likely brush off any accusations that would defile her good reputation.

He had sent Diane and Mikey to try and gather information as to what Dr. Susami had been up to recently and with intelligence keeping an eye on just about everyone in the military he wouldn't have to wait long to know her daily routine and favorite places outside of headquarters. Her involvement, should she truly be involved, would however cause very serious problems within his team, especially Fullmetal. Psychologists had access to classified files on their patients and they were sworn to keep such information to themselves. They had far too much power with such information even if they legally could not use it to incriminate their patients.

He knew of Fullmetal's past as well as what he had done that had caused him to pursue becoming a state alchemist. He had read all the files that told of his other adventures and the things he had done and been through. He always made it his business to know as much as possible about those in his command so that he could be prepared should problems arise. Out of everyone in his command Edward was in the most danger if this doctor was involved in trying to take his life or bring him down.

It was going to be another long day and unfortunately it was only noon. He made to stand so that he could go and take his lunch break but before he could get to his feet his phone rang. He picked it up after the second ring, "General Holigan speaking."

It was Mustang on the other end and he had called to give him an update on Ed's condition. The old general listened as Mustang explained that Edward had woken up and while he was unhappy to find himself in the hospital he was already showing that he would make a quick recovery.

"That's good news at least in the midst of all this unfortunate news."

Mustang agreed and asked about the progress in regards to their suspect.

"I have my men on that at this moment; I was about to head out for lunch when you called. They should return by the time I get back. Why don't you join me so that we may discuss what it is we can do about this situation?"

Mustang agreed and said that he would be by shortly they exchanged goodbyes and then the general hung up the phone. He pushed his chair back and then stood looking around his office once before walking around the desk and heading out to the outer office. He naturally found Lee still in the office filing things away; he had yet to tell him to take his break. Lee turned to him with a salute to which he waved off.

"Second Lieutenant why don't you go ahead and take lunch."

"Sir, perhaps someone should remain in the office if you are also going to take your lunch with the First Lieutenant and Major presently on an errand, sir."

That was a good point, this was why he liked to have young, sharp minded people in his command, and sometimes he forgot about a few things at his age. He wasn't as old as some of the others General's but he also wasn't as young as another General on his way to his office at this moment.

"That would be wise; I appreciate your thoughtfulness Lieutenant. When I return I expect you to take lunch."

"Yes sir."

The door to the outer office opened and Mustang entered the office followed by Havoc, Diane, and Mikey. They all paused to salute but the general waved them off immediately. "Have you two taken lunch?"

"No sir, we did acquire the information you requested," Diane answered.

"Good, give me the file and then continue with your duties here, when I return all three of you will take lunch."

"Yes sir," Diane answered smartly.

"Sir, if I could request the time to-"

"Go Mikey, I would like to hear it from someone who has seen him with their own eyes what his status is. I am also aware that your General from North H.Q. should be arriving next week."

"Thank you sir," Mikey turned and made his way out of the office and Mustang turned to Havoc and told him to go with him to which Havoc grinned, turned, and called out for Mikey to wait up. The older man regarded the young general then motioned to leave to which Mustang turned and headed out of the office and out into the hallway.

Mustang knew he could trust the older man when it came to Ed but he didn't know just how much he could trust him or how much he knew about Edward's circumstances and experiences. While he was relieved to know Edward was awake the idea of sending one of his men to the hospital to tell him just how good or badly he was doing had bothered him all day. Hawkeye had assigned a few soldiers that she knew were capable of guarding him to stay at the hospital but they were neither part of Fullmetals' team or his own so would not care much for his welfare.

"It would make me feel better if either of us could spare the men to watch over Edward instead of soldiers that do not know nor care for him."

"Indeed sir, I happen to agree," he replied to the General. Holigan was a hard working man and a tough one as well, he was strict and he had seen the way he treated those in his command as though they were his sons or daughter in Diane's case. He regarded them as people, trusted their judgment, and depended on their abilities. They were loyal to him and he did what he could to protect them and treat them respectfully. He was still a good officer and he was good with dealing with politics. While Mustang knew he himself was better at dealing with a crisis and leading men through a battlefield he was also capable of dealing with the politics and legalities that came with being an officer in the military.

"Your Colonel is preoccupied with her own work to be able to provide services in regards to the guarding of Fullmetal is she not?"

"Yes sir I am afraid so, however I have requested to have a civilian come and keep Elric company."

"Ah, who may I ask do you believe would be better than a soldier Mustang?"

"An Izumi Curtis and her husband perhaps, the family has already been alerted and she assured me that she was coming to Central to see her ex-student."

"I have heard of this Curtis woman, this would most likely prove to be beneficial."

"As long as there is no need for damage control," Mustang said.

"That would indeed be another problem," the General said with a laugh as they came to the cafeteria. Mustang didn't care much for cafeteria food but since the General was intent on eating it and he had been asked to accompany him to lunch he wasn't left with much choice. He wasn't all that surprised to see a few familiar faces, most of them not good company, also in the cafeteria.

As he and the general got their lunch he noticed that Hawkeye was making her way into the cafeteria. She nodded to him and he felt her watching where he was going. She would most likely join them for lunch as well. Colonel Zeken glared at him as he sat down but he easily brushed it off, there was little the colonel could do to him since Mustang outranked him and his subordinate Captain Jacobs.

The colonel was a bit overweight with brown hair and droopy brown eyes and stood at an average height. Like anyone of rank his uniform was in order and kept clean. His subordinate was a contrast in appearance, tall, skinny, too many sharp angles in his face, slanted eyes that were a dull gray in color. He had a crooked mouth when he made a facial expression and a pointed nose. There was a bit of musculature to him, much like with Havoc, but it didn't appear as though the man knew how to use it, unlike Havoc.

Both of them were watching him with contempt but he brushed off their glowering looks and turned to offer a greeting to Hawkeye as she came over to the table the General had decided on. The general smiled warmly at her as she asked if she could join them and immediately agreed.

"It's always pleasant having such a lovely woman join us men for lunch."

"Thank you sir, though I believe your wife would not be so happy to hear you say such things."

"Ah, she isn't very happy with me currently for my time spent in the office."

Hawkeye took her seat to the left of Mustang as she said, "Perhaps you should take some leave yourself to make up for your time spent in the office sir."

"That may be something to look forward to; however I would have to leave someone in charge of my men and would feel better doing as such after Edward undergoes his now mandatory training."

"I though it was only a request by you sir," Hawkeye asked before Mustang could.

"It originally was but to have this occur shortly after his return, the Fuhrer himself sent a request to have the Fullmetal alchemist go through training as well as officer training. He is an officer but he has only recently joined the list of enlisted."

"With this it will be months before you can have any time to take leave sir," Hawkeye offered before quietly beginning to eat her lunch. They were serving too dry turkey with gravy, bread, potatoes, and corn today for lunch. They would probably be serving the same for dinner as well. They all set to eating in silence while the general opened the file Diane had given him. Mustang allowed himself to go through his thoughts and sort them out while the three of them ate.

"It seems that our suspect has an alibi for the time the two of you saw her as well as when she was supposedly speaking with Mrs. Elric," Holigan explained by the time they had all finished with their food. He closed the file and ran a tired hand through his hair.

"Was she with a patient at the time?"

"Yes, their were witnesses that stated she was with a patient at not only the same time as both of you stated you had encountered her, but also at the same time as when Mrs. Elric stated she had seen and spoken with her."

This was definitely going to be much more difficult than they had thought. If this woman had an alibi how could she possibly be in two places at once? She had disappeared into thin air shortly after their encounter with her but there were too many gaps that still needed to be filled. The general had her information and most likely her routine was noted in that file as well since he had undoubtedly received his information from intelligence. Many of those in intelligence had worked for Hues and proved to be very good at their jobs.

"Sir, I noticed while looking into this matter that the suspect and the doctor have different appearances, do you think perhaps they are not the same individual?"

Mustang noticed the way the older man simply shook his head with a stern look in regards to Hawkeye's question before he answered, "There are too many things that point towards it being the same person. However, proving as much is not going to be any easier than proving she is responsible for something. We need all the facts and information and even then it will be a matter of convincing the higher ups that she is indeed guilty."

"There is no reason to doubt that our current suspect is behind the events that have unfolded since Fullmetal's return?"

"No," both Mustang and Holigan answered at the same time, Hawkeye frowned at their answer and how quickly they answered her question. She looked to both of them for a moment before getting to her feet and picking up her tray. "Perhaps we should make absolute certain we are not looking where a dead end may be found. It is best to cover all our ground," she paused for a moment to let her words sink in before saying, "sir," then turned and emptied her tray. Mustang followed her progress for a moment before turning back to regard the General. Holigan looked thoughtful for a moment then got to his feet to which Mustang did as well.

"Your Colonel will indeed be a great loss for your team Mustang; I believe she has a very valid point. We will have to do all we are capable of to ensure that our suspect is indeed the yet to be proven guilty party."

Mustang nodded in agreement and then commented on what the General had to say regarding Hawkeye, "The Colonel has been a blessing to my team, I shall see what it is that I can do sir."

"Good man, now I would like for you to run an errand for me if you are not too busy Mustang."

"Yes sir, what can I do for you?"

"I wish to meet this Mrs. Curtis and her husband before they see the Lieutenant Colonel at the hospital if it is not too much trouble."

"Of course sir," Mustang said with a bit of weariness, Izumi Curtis couldn't stand the military and he did not wish to meet with her if she had not been told Edward had extended his military contract. He had yet to speak with her since the Promised Day incident and was not aware of how much she knew about what Edward's life had become like in the last two years. Holigan was watching him closely for a reaction or perhaps for something else and Mustang hoped that he had not given anything away in that brief moment of silence.

"It should prove to be interesting to meet a woman in which I have heard much about. Oh, I should like to inform you that an old friend from the north has changed the date of their arrival, they should be here no later than tomorrow afternoon."

"Of course sir, I will be sure to greet them accordingly," General Holigan smirked and turned away from the table, "See that you do, good day Mustang."

"Good day to you sir," Mustang said and waited for a moment before making his way to dispose of his own tray and head back to his own office. He needed to speak with Alphonse and find out just what he had told his teacher. He would not like to face her unprepared and would need his help in convincing the woman to speak with General Holigan before she saw Edward which he pictured would not go over well. Izumi Curtis was very much a surrogate mother to the Elrics and the last time she had spoken with him she had not been pleased to know that they were directly involved with what was going on with the government and he had done near to nothing to protect them. Edward had managed to convince her that it was his own stupidity that had him and Al involved.

"Alphonse Elric is here chief," Havoc informed him from the doorway, Mustang nodded and thanked him then watched as Al entered the office taking in his appearance and feeling a pang of sympathy. Al looked as stressed and worn out as he felt if not worse, there were thick, dark circles under his eyes, his skin was paler and his hair was a mess. He knew that Ed had regained consciousness but the time he was unconscious had been jarring for everyone and no doubt Al had more than just Edward's physical ailments to worry about. Al took a seat on the couch with a tired sigh after Mustang motioned him to sit down. He ran his hand through his hair and looked to him with a very lost and frustrated look in his copper eyes.

"What is it you wished to see me for General?"

"I know you have plenty to deal with currently Alphonse and I am glad that Edward has at least regained consciousness," Al nodded silently but didn't comment which could very well mean that Ed wasn't being helpful nor cooperative in regards to his health on any front. "General Holigan requested a chance to speak with Mrs. Curtis and her husband before they arrive."

Al paled and Mustang felt the blood drain from his face at such a reaction, so she didn't know enough to not be severely pissed when she arrived. Al leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees so he could bury his face in his hands. After a few moments he looked up at him and nodded once, "Alright, is there any chance we can let General Holigan- Oh never mind, that's cowardly and will just make her even more angry and disappointed. She should be here tomorrow morning, I guess Winry and I will have to greet her and tell her what is going on so that brother will have a chance of recovering before she kills him," Al let out a weak laugh but there was more fear for self preservation than humor in his laugh.

Mustang nodded silently, he wasn't likely to forget that particular woman's temper anytime soon and most likely not in this life time. "Are you or Miss Winry having any trouble with the soldiers Colonel Hawkeye provided to watch over Fullmetal?"

Al shook his head, "Not really, they are good at their job, not very friendly but they have managed to ignore or withstand, I'm not sure, brothers' temper so far. When Teacher gets here I don't think she'll like having soldiers around."

"Considering the circumstances I don't think I can completely relieve your brother of his guard. I can perhaps lessen the amount of soldiers but that is the best I can do. Depending on whether or not any more complications arise it may come to you and Miss Winry also having someone guarding you as well."

Al nodded, "I understand," and once again Mustang was grateful for the difference and tolerance that Alphonse possessed that his brother had never seemed able to grasp. He was certain that Al would have politely dismissed the offer for protection if his wife and daughter were not also in danger. Al was much like Ed in that regard; he would demand the best protection for those around them and not spare a thought for himself. Selflessness was something both brothers shared but showed in different ways.

"Have you found anything out?"

"Not anything that can be proven as of yet I'm afraid. How is Edward doing now that he is awake?"

"Well since Havoc and Mikey left," Mustang smirked at hearing that Al was at least addressing those in his command and his brothers' comrade by their first name. "Brother has mostly decided that he wants to pretend to be asleep and ignore everyone. I was less than calm with him because he is being so insufferably stubborn, I know he has been through a lot but it's only hurting him keeping it all to himself. Winry is with him right now and I don't like having Mrs. Hues having to watch Anna because she already does so much for all of us-"

"Alphonse, anyone of us would be glad to assist you in any way that we can."

Al paused a moment once he spoke and looked at him with a bit too much hopefulness, "I really could use you're help General, Winry and I would appreciate some time for both of us to assure Anna so that she will actually believe us. Plus Teacher will be here in the morning and she won't-I would really appreciate it if you could stay with brother for tonight at the hospital-"

Mustang cut him off at that, "I don't think that would be wise-"

"I know you and brother don't get along very well and it's not that I don't trust someone else to stay with him. But he would listen to you better than he would anyone else and at least then we could tell Anna why both I and Winry are home with her without making her more upset than she already is."

Silence fell between them as thoughts raced through his head concerning the many disasters that could occur if he agreed to this. In the end he was drawn back to a thought he had only three years ago, he knew he shouldn't have held Anna as a baby and given her the chance to wrap him around his finger as surely as Elysia had. What could he do if he knew saying no was going to upset Anna and thus Elysia and Gracia along with Al and Winry? Really there was no saying no to Al on any day but with so many more people that would be upset he was trapped. It was a bad idea, he and Ed had not been getting along very well if at all lately and their last encounter was not pleasant. He still felt guilty for his own carelessness and Ed didn't like hospitals at all and would most likely be more irritable than was usual for him, sore, standoffish, defensive, and no doubt putting his sharp sarcasm to use on nearly everyone. It would be trying and would require him to stretch his patience much further than he already had.

"Just this once Al, I'm afraid that I have far too much to be doing to offer up anymore time." He hoped that sounded polite enough and seeing as how Al's entire form lit with gratefulness Roy was confident that he had managed to word his answer correctly. He still had a bad feeling about this and was sure it was going to end in disaster but he would do what he could to make sure Ed took care of himself and would do anything to help both Elric's. Some habits he never could seem to break.

Hawkeye decided it would be best to accompany him to the hospital to stay with Edward who had been transferred over to the military hospital and would finally have a more private room. The doctor who treated Edward referred him to a doctor that Mustang was familiar with and did not care for. Hawkeye said that she would do what she could to get a better doctor and had handed the task over to Havoc to take care of. The halls were nearly silent at seven in the evening, most visiting the patients having decided to call it a night or otherwise settled in for the night.

As they both walked through the empty hallways their shoes clicked along the tile floors at the same time, both falling into step unconsciously and walking in utter silence for most of the walk. Mustang let Hawkeye lead the way since she had come by earlier to make sure Edward was well taken care of and as comfortable as he could be while in a hospital room. She had informed him back at the office that she had already sent Alphonse and Winry to Gracia's to be with their daughter and that Breda was waiting for them to arrive outside of Ed's room.

She finally broke the silence as they came up to the section where Edward's room was located, "They have already given him some sedatives and pain medication to help him sleep, they were not very strong dosages as Miss Winry was present and made certain they didn't give him anything that would make him sleep for too long. It should be a pleasant and quiet evening sir."

Mustang gave a short nod of acknowledgment, "One would hope so but I believe that depends on Fullmetal."

"He was not nearly as argumentative as you think when Alphonse informed him of who would stay with him tonight. I do believe Edward had some choice words and stated he didn't require a babysitter but other than that he was fairly calm about it."

He couldn't help but to think that regardless of what she was telling him Edward would not be so calm and complacent once he did arrive. He saw Breda further down the hall when they made a right turn; there was a nurse station to his left and five rooms down from where Breda was getting to his feet. Breda smirked and that made him wonder if his expression showed his apprehension. Breda saluted to Hawkeye who returned it and then addressed both of them, "The boss is still sound asleep, Mikey and Diana were by an hour ago. Mikey said that our friend from the north would be speaking with you sir."

Mustang grimace, he and Olivia Armstrong didn't get along with one another anymore than they liked one another. The fact that the woman wished to speak with him in regards to Edward's condition spoke volumes of how much she cared for Ed. It was highly possible that she would take Edward into her command when the time came for him to undergo training. There was also a base for officer training in the north and one of her officers was in charge of that, some were even lucky, or unlucky, enough to end up being trained by General Armstrong herself.

"Sir it looks like you lost some color in your face," Breda was smirking as he said that. Hawkeye's mouth twitched but she kept her expression blank. She stepped over to the door and eased it open looking inside Ed's room before shutting the door quietly and turning to regard both of them. "He is still asleep but I believe it would be best to send someone else to make sure the two of you do not kill one another in the morning."

Mustang nodded, "Yes, I believe that would be a good idea"

"I would advise staying here until Mrs. Curtis and the Elrics return sir as we cannot spare that many to stay with Edward."

"Thank you Colonel, I will keep that in mind."

"I will have Captain Havoc bring some of your things for you in the morning sir, have a good night." She turned to regard Breda, "I believe that General Holigan will have Major Herth come to relieve you shortly First Lieutenant."

"Thank you ma'am."

Hawkeye nodded and turned on her heel and left with a flash of a smile and Breda turned to him with that same all knowing smirk on his face, "Enjoy your night General."

"I'm sure that I will First Lieutenant," Mustang answered with a smirk of his own before opening the door and stepping inside. He paused in the threshold at the sight of Edward. He had seen him before at the other hospital and the sight alone had seemed to turn his blood to ice. Edward had regained some color and without a respirator he already looked much better than before. Currently he was sleeping lying on his back and his golden blond hair made a halo around his head on the pillow. He must not have cared to tie it back before and so had left it lose. While the white sheets and blandness to the room still seemed to bleach out most of his coloring there was still a glow about his skin.

He stepped inside the room and closed to the door upon hearing Breda clear his throat and made his way over to the chair positioned beside Edward's bed. The blond didn't stir in his sleep and now he could see his face more clearly. The machine he was hooked up to beat steadily and that noise was more soothing than a hindrance as it ensured that despite how peaceful Edward looked as he slept a drug induced slumber he was indeed still alive and for that he was eternally grateful. Too many close calls even before the Promised day and then more had plagued him and others that cared for Edward following that dreadful day.

Mustang shifted in the chair and decided to remove his uniform jacket, it was warm enough in the room that he wouldn't need it and the uniform was not very comfortable to wear even on a good day. He folded his jacket neatly and placed it on the bedside table just behind him. Then he turned and truly looked at Edward's sleeping face. He looked much calmer and peaceful than he had ever seen him, his was completely unguarded and that he remained so even in his presence was truly a blessing as much as all the times Edward could have been lost to them all.

After a few minutes of listening to the steady breaths and the steady heartbeats through the monitor to Edward's left Mustang closed his eyes and decided it was best he catch some sleep. Regardless of the fact he would have to remain here until Al, Winry, and the Curtis' arrived it was still going to be another long day tomorrow. As he drifted off to sleep he soon found himself entangled in dreams of the time in Ishval that seemed blended with the events of the promised day. He could smell and taste the blood in the air and feel it slipping between his fingers from Hawkeye's throat.

The blood stained his clothes, burnt into his skin, and scorched his throat but never seemed to leave or want to release him. He tried to pull back, to pull away and try to escape this hell he was trapped within but nothing seemed to work or want to listen to him. Trapped as he was not even alchemy was at his disposal in this nightmare. Flames licked at his skin and burned its way through him from the inside but he could no more conjure his own to try and get rid of the smell and taste of blood than he could escape the fire encompassing him.

Faces, unknown victims flashed across his vision and the screams that followed would surely leave him deaf. So much pain on their faces, men, women, children, killed because of his alchemy and the orders issued to use it to take their lives. He remembered starting out with killing those the military told him were his enemies with quick precision to try and save them the torment of being burned alive. But as time had progressed and things had become chaotic at best he found that he fell into simply burning everything. After weeks of that dreadful massacre he had fallen into fighting for survival until their seemed to be nothing left.

With those tormenting memories came the faces of those he had failed to protect, failed to save, he always seemed to be failing more than he seemed to be winning or keeping his word. Hues, his best friend and the man who had not only saved him from himself but provided the support he had needed as well as became the family he had never had. Riza had been his best friend and confidant for so long and since their farce of a relationship he had found that he cared for as a sister more than anything. He had failed them both, the two that had seen him at his worst and always been there for him he had failed to protect.

Now their screams and blood merged with those of the victims whose lives he had taken, while one was still alive by a miracle in the form of a little princess from Xing the other was not. Flashes of the times Hues had helped him came to him only to be overshadowed by the scene that Hues had lost his life at. The blood that had coated the phone booth, the concrete, and then the blood that had seeped from between Hawkeye's fingers that day. As he fought to escape this prison of a nightmare he found himself locked in place by the sight of another person he had failed to protect.

His mind provided the images that he had not seen in person . . . Images of Edward lying on the cold stone ground with the automail arm and leg missing, blood pooling around him from those missing limbs, pale, scarred with countless slash marks across his skin. Blood coated the golden skin turned ghostly pale and those golden eyes looked at him accusingly even though they were void of life. He fought against what was holding him, wanting to get to Edward's side to see for himself that he was gone. His breath locked up in his throat and his heart stuttered to a stop in his chest as he slowly got closer and closer, realization sinking in all the more.

"MUSTANG!"

And like that he was brought abruptly back to the present, blinking away the sleep from his eyes and raising one hand to smooth it over his face he opened his eyes to see Ed, golden eyes wide with concern and trepidation, watching him as though he were a caged animal. It took a moment for him to register how close Edward was to him and another shocked moment to realize that he was sitting beside Ed on the cold ground of the hospital room. He had to fight back an urge to pull Edward into his arms and assure himself that he was there and alive and that the dream was exactly that, only a nightmare that had never happened.

Only it had, though not with Ed losing his life, but the blond haired youth sitting there watching him with concern that was quickly becoming ire had been through his own hell. He still did not know the full details and he doubted that he ever would. For two long years he had not known whether this fiery youth were alive or what nightmarish torment he had been forced to endure. But it would be a good idea to say something before Fullmetal decided to punch him for sitting there like a fool.

"It's good to see you up and about Fullmetal," he managed with what he hoped was calm but he could hear the shakiness in his own voice and grimaced. Ed glared at him and made to get up only to fall to one knee with a painful hiss and his hand closing over his injured shoulder. Mustang clenched his left fist when reaching out with his right hand caused Ed to flinch back from him with a low growl rumbling through his throat. Ed forced himself to his feet and climbed back into his bed and Mustang gathered his bearings and got to his feet glancing at the window on the far side of the room to see that it was still dark outside and most likely the middle of the night.

"Sit down and shut up so I can go back to sleep bastard," Ed said to him irritably.

Before he could do more than seat himself back in the chair Ed had laid back down with his back turned to him and let out a yawn. Mustang stared at him for a moment before running his hand tiredly through his hair. "Sorry for waking you."

"Told ya' to shut up," Ed mumbled with another yawn. Mustang felt the urge to cross his arms over his chest and pout much like Edward used to do but he was far too old for such childishness. The brush off from Edward was expected but that did little to alleviate the agitation he felt because of it. He remained silent as he stared at Ed's back for a moment wishing he could reach out and smack him upside the head in much the same fashion the younger Elric brother had once done. The hospital gowns were thin and barely considered clothing suitable to cover anyone. The gown hung around Ed like a blanket and he was sure that in better lighting he would probably be able to make out the scars Ed carried with him if he looked hard enough.

"Quit staring bastard, I can feel it," Ed muttered with noticeable agitation in his voice. Mustang blinked and looked over to the wall above Ed's head, "Shouldn't you be getting some more sleep Edward?"

"I would never have been woken up if not for you and then you're talking and staring, how the hell can I get anymore sleep?"

"Surely you are old enough to be able to ignore the things around you. As I recall you are perfectly capable of sleeping nearly anywhere."

"Sleeping yeah, falling asleep is different."

"Oh? How so?"

Ed growled and rolled over carefully sitting up to glare heatedly at him, "Must you sit here and talk to me when I want to sleep?"

"It has been unusually pleasant speaking with you the last few times and I am merely curious as to whether such an event can occur once more. Now, why is falling asleep different for you now when before you could sleep through anything?"

Ed huffed, "It just is. What the hell are you doing here anyway?"

"Your brother and his lovely wife asked me to watch over you for a night so they could see to Anna and assure her that her uncle Eddie will be alright."

"Fucker, don't call me that," Ed hissed, "Watching over me? More like gawking bastard, can't you do you're watching outside the room somewhere?"

Mustang felt a bit hurt by that but hid it well, "Perhaps, if you were a more co-operative patient."

"What the fuck ever, then just sit there, shut up, and don't stare then," Ed shifted again, pulled the blanket up over him and rolled over to sleep on his uninjured side thus turning his back to Mustang once more. The older man frowned and crossed his arms leaning back in the chair and closing his eyes trying to fall back into a light sleep so as to escape becoming a victim of his nightmares once more this night. Reliving the hell he knew and becoming trapped by his own warped thoughts and possible scenarios once was more than enough for a night.

When morning came Ed had to admit that he found himself feeling better and in a better mood than he had been in yesterday or last night. His right shoulder was still on fire and he didn't care to think about what he had seen when the nurse had arrived not too long ago to change his bandages. The skin beneath those bandages reminded him of that time he had to use alchemy to save his own life and he shuddered at the memory only to inhale sharply at how that jostled his injury. The nurse had informed him that he had a shattered collar bone, which he had wanted to tell her was obvious seeing as how every breath brought with it a shock of pain. Laying back hurt thanks to the bruising and the fact that he had a still recovering bullet wound that had ended up right beside the plates, which he found were removed. At least his arm was still there, not that it was of any use, but he would have hated not having it.

He sincerely hoped that there wasn't a need for any repairs to the automail but logically he knew that at least two bolts and screws needed to be replaced, the automail felt a bit loose. He wasn't looking forward to the drilling, slicing, and threading that was most likely going to entail. Going through that hell once was more than enough for him, going through a second time he didn't know if he would be able to hold back screams of frustration from the agony of it. If any of those bastards were still alive he was going to beat them to death, fuckers had to shoot him, make him end up in a hospital, and have to deal with repairs to the automail.

He turned his attention back to the rooms' other occupant, he had let himself think he would be lucky enough that the bastard had left but he was still there. Seeing Mustang in his room keeping vigil over him had startled him considerably and to realize it was not a figment of his imagination when Mustang found himself trapped in his own nightmares had been enough to make him feel uncertain and thus he had been irritable. He was still pissed at Mustang anyway; the man was too all knowing and nosy when it came to him. He knew the man cared, but that didn't make him any less aggravating.

He hated always having to concentrate on making sure no one could see how fucked up and lost he still was but around his ex-C.O. he had to work that much harder because the asshole was good at reading people and had always made him feel like he could see straight through him. He predicted his actions and always knew what was going on during those missions even if he didn't know every single detail. He knew the man had no idea of just how much shit he and Al had to put up with those years searching for the stone anymore than the man knew everything of what he had been through in Rousia. Well, Ed planned to keep it that way; he could ignore the attraction shit because he would prefer to keep his distance than to risk being judged for anything he'd done.

He wasn't ready to let anyone know how fucking weak and worthless he felt during those two years and he sure as hell didn't want the arrogant prick to find out what he'd been reduced to while there. Here, among everyone he had pretty much grown up around, he preferred them all to see him as they always thought him to be. It was better that way because then they didn't ask and they didn't worry as much, he knew they all still worried and were concerned but letting them know anything of what he was dealing with would only make it worse. He didn't want their pity and they couldn't help him with this one.

He flinched in surprise when he heard the chair next to his bed creak and turned over to see Mustang yawning and stretching his arms over his head. He looked like a cat when he did that and for some odd reason Ed thought of a black jungle cat as he watched. He blinked and turned his head away when sleepy dark eyes caught his own.  
"Morning," Mustang said with a rough and sleepy voice.

Ed wanted to groan aloud at the heat that coursed through him from the sound and the sleep rumpled appearance of his way too good looking for his own good ex-commanding officer. Ed grunted instead trying to cover the sound that had wanted to escape his throat. While he stifled the sound he couldn't shove the blush down fast enough. He turned his head away and said gruffly, "Shouldn't you be at work by now," he glanced to the window wincing when the action made his shoulder hurt but brushing it off quickly. The sun was already high in the sky which gave him a vague idea of the time.

"Usually yes, however your brother and sister-in-law have a few things they needed to do before they came back to the hospital."

Dread threaded its way into his veins, he didn't know why but he could guess of a number of things that required Al and Winry both and had to be taken care of and they did not sound pleasant. He most likely didn't want to know but considering how much his brother and sister-in-law wanted to ask him ceaseless questions all the time about his well being it could be a possibility that his brother had called on Pinako or maybe even teacher. He shuddered at the thought, he had yet to speak with Izumi since that first week he had finally dragged his sorry ass back to Central.

"Are you feeling alright, you look a bit pale Edward," Mustang asked bringing him out of his thoughts. He scowled at the man ignoring the genuine look of concern in the man's expression as he snapped back, "Buzz off asshole."

Ed wasn't very concerned by the dark flash of anger that crossed Mustang's face, if the older man got angry then maybe he would leave him be. He didn't feel like being questioned about what had happened however many days ago he had been shot and he sure as hell wasn't telling him a damn thing of what he'd been harassing him about before that. He never could seem to get a break, just get back to Central and if Mustang isn't bombarding him with questions then Al was or Winry was giving him these hurt looks or he was being shot at or teased by Havoc and Breda. He didn't mind the teasing or the drinking, or the lectures from Sal when he woke up on the old man's couch to tell the truth.

"You will have plenty of guests that will wish to see you within the next few days."

"How long have I been out of it?"

"You were unconscious for fifty two hours and then you slept on and off most of yesterday. If you recall you woke up a number of times last night."

"Yeah I recall, couldn't you have had Breda or someone stick around instead of showing up-" he cut himself off wondering why he had completely avoided mentioning what had woken him up last night. He must be getting soft to not throw that back in the asshole's face.

"Alphonse specifically asked for me to be here as I am the only one with the flexibility to make my own schedule. Rest assured Edward I will have to make up for the lost time and will therefore not have much free time to come and make your life miserable by my mere presence."

"Good, had enough of the fucking interrogations. It's a great way to return from a two year assignment, being questioned all the damn time."

"Ah, I should apologize for my lack of courtesy. It was rather rude to demand answers from you right after your arrival. However, that is how the military-"

"Oh shut the fuck up Mustang, I know that shit. But you started asking me about shit that has nothing to do with military regulations. Besides, since when is my personal problems any of your damn business," his voice had definitely managed to hold plenty of defensive anger in it which he scowled at himself for allowing. He tried to regain some amount of control and finished with, "And, if you ever even suggest that I am some kind of coward again I am going-"

"It would not be wise to finish that statement sir, you are in a military medical facility," Hawkeye's voice sounded from the door. Both had been so focused on their own arguments and not letting the other know their true intentions that they had not noticed her approach. "Perhaps we should merely keep the two of you apart for some time, it is unbecoming to be so unaware of what is going on about you . . . sirs."

Mustang frowned but remained silent while Ed let out a sigh, "Do you know where Al and Winry are, this asshole said they had things to do but that was it."

Ed frowned when Hawkeye actually allowed herself to smirk for a moment before her professional mask fell back into place, she was so much better at that than Mustang was, if you blinked you wouldn't catch it.

"I was simply informed that they had to go and pick someone up from the train station this morning. They should be along shortly, which is why I am here. Alphonse had called and said they were going to breakfast and then would be here. You should be able to get to work in little more than an hour sir."

"Where is Havoc, I thought you were done working for Mustang."

Hawkeye regarded him silently for a moment, "Captain Havoc is currently getting some much needed rest. He has been rather busy making certain that you have a capable guard on duty at all times."

"Guard, for what?"

"Surely you recall what happened Edward?"

Ed grimaced, yeah, he and Mustang were arguing in the middle of the street right after he'd left Sal's and someone opened fire on them. He'd known from the sounds of the bullets and the number of close calls that they were assassins. He did remember ducking behind an alley and taking out one of the guys but they were still being shot at. They were trying to kill both of them, except, he shifted his shoulder and hissed at the pain that brought. If they had wanted to kill him then why shoot him in the shoulder and not aim for a vital spot? It wasn't killing him they were after but they sure as hell were trying to kill Mustang. There was also the fact that the shoulder he had been his in wasn't an easy target if they meant to actually cause him harm. It was an unspoken threat that told him they could kill him but for some reason might have been ordered not to do so.

"What's going on," he asked of Hawkeye.

"We have reason to believe that the shooting that occurred was an attempt on your life Lieutenant Colonel and not merely an attempt on the General's."

"That doesn't make sense, I mean sure they were trying to kill the bastard here, but if they were set on killing me then they could have easily have shot me somewhere vital. Instead I got shot in the shoulder."

"Are you certain they had the chance to aim at a vital spot?"

"Yeah, I was positioned in the mouth of the alleyway because I thought they were after the General."

Mustang and Hawkeye exchanged glances and then Hawkeye looked back to him, "Perhaps we should give you what little evidence we have found. We have possible suspects but little to go from."

"Who?"

Hawkeye glanced to Mustang again most likely asking for permission and Ed frowned at that, someone was out to do something to him, obviously not to kill him yet, but there was hesitance to give him the details. Mustang nodded curtly and Hawkeye gave a slight nod, "Well, we believe this plot is much greater than we can assume and that one of the people involved is named Susami."

"Susami, like that bitch psychiatrist the old man keeps making me talk to?"

"Perhaps, but we cannot find a way to prove as such."

"The one we encountered also looks a great deal different than Doctor Susami."

"That hardly matters, changing state is basic for any alchemist and she has a damn good grasp on alchemy."

"We have reason to believe she has other means at her disposal."

"Like what?"

Mustang's mouth twitched down into a frown and Hawkeye looked a bit angry, probably because whatever had happened was something she couldn't make sense of. That had him feeling uneasy, after everything that had taken place involving 'Father' there wasn't much any of them had not seen. What the hell had happened when they'd encountered this Susami woman that they suspected to be the same one he knew?

"She has a great deal of strength and used what I thought to be fire alchemy; however I could not extinguish the flames and trying merely made them worse."

That made absolutely no sense whatsoever, Mustang was the expert on fire alchemy and Ed had come across books that spoke of it to know that it required a great deal of control and willpower to use fire alchemy, the scale the General used it on meant he had a truly impeccable amount of control and will power. That he couldn't extinguish the flames from that woman did speak a lot of her abilities but it also meant that it couldn't have possibly have been alchemy she had used. He wasn't one to believe in things like magic anymore than he believed in God or religious ideas and prophecies. Magic was a fairy tale, something in fiction novels, it made no sense and could not be proven through theory and foundations like alchemy could. Alchemy was a science and tangible.

"You sure you weren't just off your game or something?"

"I am fairly certain considering that I had a companion with me Fullmetal."

Ed growled low in his throat from the use of that name, "Alright, whatever. Then maybe you're just not as great as you think you are," there, so earlier was just a fluke he could still find the words needed to throw insults at the guy.

"It may be possible you are looking for a way to disprove what has been said, it was not alchemy she used. Alchemy can be felt."

Well yeah, he had him there. Any alchemists could feel the power and electricity of alchemy in the air, the best of them could feel it building up before a circle was even activated. Mostly he found that only he and Teacher could do that and it had helped him figure out whom the truly dangerous or truly knowledgeable alchemists were throughout his assignments. Those exposed to the gate had a more attuned ability to sense and feel alchemy and its' users' intentions because of their closer relationship with what powered alchemy.

"You couldn't feel anything, no alchemy, no current at all when she used whatever she used to create those flames?"

"No, and she did not seem to create them merely summon them from thin air."

"That makes even less sense," he turned his attention back to Hawkeye, "Did she make any gestures, clasping her hands together, any tattoo's on her palms?"

"No. She merely raised her hands above her head-"

"That sounds like-" the youngest of the blonds in the room cut off the elder at that declaration. Raised her arms above her head that was all 'Father' had to do to use alchemy, a simple movement or gesture, he could guess even blinking would have done something. That was entirely different scale of alchemy and not something he really took the time to understand, his father had never been very open about explaining whatever power '_Father_' had possessed that gave him such an ability. Neither of the other occupants in the room had said anything else leaving him to think in silence.

If she used alchemy like that insane homunculus had then it would explain why the General was unable to extinguish the flames, but not why he had no effect on them at all. "When you used your alchemy did it still work, the energy flow was there," he asked of the older man.

A nod was his answer and then, "Yes, when I tried to use my own alchemy it merely made whatever she had used react violently."

Okay, so she wasn't using the same kind of alchemy that psychotic asshole had used but then what the hell was she using? If not Xerxian alchemy then could it be alkestry? No, he had spent plenty of time studying the Xingneese Alkestry to know better, they still had to use circles and their philosophies and way of using their version of alchemy didn't grant them the unfortunate experience of meeting the gate. They had to use circles no matter what. The Amestrian alchemy was darker and required more energy to use and often times backfired or back lashed but even those who didn't need circles let off energy that let others, especially close by, aware of the fact that they were using alchemy.

It made no logical sense and despite all the research he had done and all the texts he had read and decrypted he couldn't piece together a reasonable explanation for how this woman could have that much power without any methods that were required to use alchemy. If she wasn't using alchemy then what the hell was she using?

"Would you like some breakfast Edward?"

Ed looked to the Colonel in confusion for a moment before he nodded politely, "Yeah, thanks."

She nodded in return, "Of course, I will see what I can find for both of you, try not to cause a scene."

Ed looked over at Mustang who was giving his former assistant a smirk that did not promise anything other than trouble, he rolled his eyes at the familiar expression. Hawkeye turned and left the room closing the door quietly behind herself but not before giving the General a meaningful look. A tense silence fell over the room for a moment as both alchemists decided against speaking to one another to try and avoid an argument. The younger was grateful for the silence until his older guest made the decision to break that peacefulness.

"Have you thought on whether or not you truly wish to receive your training at North Headquarters?"

"Don't see how I have the time with everyone harassing me and getting shot at," he snapped in reply, but of course the General was well versed with his young ex-subordinate's attitude towards him so he didn't even blink.

"Edward, do you truly wish to separate yourself from those that care after you so recently returned to grace us with your presence?"

"Did you miss that part of everyone harassing me, I didn't use that description unintentionally," gold eyes turned away from his company to glare at the wall. He wished the man would leave already, just the last few minutes around him was getting on his nerves.

"No, your choice of words hardly escaped my attention."

"Who did Al and Winry go to the train station to pick up?"

"I believe that is best left for you to figure out when they arrive."

"Fucker," Ed muttered under his breath expecting the prick not to tell him but wanting a change in subject. He could figure out on his own that a lot of people would be upset but hell he would only be gone for two months and then he would have to return back to Central. He would rather just stay at North H.Q. because at least the General there didn't present him with looks of pity and while she demanded to know everything it was for practical reasons. It was hard to protect yourself and those in your command if you had no idea what might confront them later on. She already knew everything she needed to know anyway so he wasn't going to have to relive any of that over again and telling her about Xing would be simple in comparison to telling her what he could about Rousia.

"Perhaps they gave you far too much pain medication," annoyed gold eyes locked with indigo blue before the younger broke the eye contact with a agitated grunt, "Shut up. Maybe I just don't want to hear what you have to say."

"You hardly ever managed to hear a word I've said any other time."

"That's mostly because you're an arrogant, pompous, ass."

"At least you haven't lost your colorful vocabulary."

"Hasn't an hour passed yet?"

"Hardly, I believe only half an hour has gone by since the Colonel arrived."

"Great, another half to go with your company."

"You are hardly pleasant company yourself, especially with such a charming personality."

"You could have puppeteered your way out of keeping watch over me, as though I fucking need any help from you anyway."

That definitely struck a cord considering the dark expression on the bastards' face from his comment but he was in too bad of a mood to care. Thankfully Hawkeye returned to the room with two bags in her hand and was managing to carry two cups of coffee as well. Ed couldn't stop his reaction at seeing and smelling the coffee, maybe his mood would lift after he had some caffeine, though he doubted it considering the unwanted company in the room. She handed them their breakfast before taking a seat at the edge of Ed's bed to which the younger man was too concerned about the food and drink she had presented him with to care much about.

Once both of them had finished breakfast the youngest in the room stiffened at the sound of an all too familiar voice coming from down the hall.

"I can see my idiot of a pupil has managed to royally mess up this time to have soldiers guarding his room."

All the color drained from a usually tan face as he swallowed around the lump in his throat, it was a good thing he was already hospitalized because he had the distinct feeling his Teacher wasn't going to be in the best of moods in regards to him.

_To be continued . . . _


	9. Chapter Eight

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all-powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**

**Pairing: Roy/Ed**

**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure**

**Spoilers: Up until the current chapter of the manga. (Ch 99)**

**Series: FMA**

**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**

**Status: Work In Progress**

**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**

_A/N: Sorry for the lateness of this chapter, RL often gets in the way, especially lately. Hope this proves enjoyable and happy reading._

* * *

**Chapter 8**

Mustang felt a smirk curve his lips at the sight of Ed acting more like his age in his uncertainty and that inkling of trepidation that radiated off him. Mrs. Curtis was sitting in the chair he had once occupied while he stood outside the room waiting on Hawkeye to return with Winry and Al who had gone to get everyone something to drink and to check on Anna. Mr. Curtis was standing vigil on the other side of the door and while the door was closed, there were times when both of the rooms' occupants' voices would raise enough to hear them through the door.

He had no idea what was neither going on nor what was being said, but after the brief amount of humor, he truly hoped that somehow, his ex-subordinate's teacher would be able to get through to the stubborn young man. He worried because the blonds' defensiveness was more worrisome than when he would keep everyone at a distance with his anger. He did realize that he had lacked tact and had tried to question the obstinate youths' reasons for keeping to himself too soon. However, when the other alchemist had decided without much thought that he wished to undergo his training far from everyone so shortly after his return he had felt anger well up in him. These actions were not characteristic of the bold, brave, and strong genius to be so set on avoiding everyone; he was running away instead of confronting any of them.

* * *

Sitting in the hospital room, the older woman couldn't help but feel a strong sense of protectiveness and pride well up in her at the sight of her ex-student. She could tell from watching and looking at him that his time in Xing had a very positive effect on him. The clouds that had darkened his eyes and cast his soul in an impenetrable shadow had not disappeared but it had definitely cleared up a good deal. After their usual shouting match where she would point out his stupidity to get himself injured and the worry, he had caused everyone over the last few days they settled into a few moments of silence. She had not touched base on what Winry and Al had said in regards to how her student was acting towards them, rather she had told them both how their actions were not the best thing for the trouble young adult they were concerned with at the moment.

She had always cared for both of her students and during the time that the younger Elric had stayed with her during his search for his elder brother she had learned a great deal about the changes in him. Her own experiences did not grant her the ability to begin to understand what her oldest student had been through anymore than she could understand the torment those who had been through a war had to suffer through each and every day. This young man looking down at his lap in solemn silence had seen so very much and survived very tremendous amounts of hardships alone. The years both Elrics spent on the road trying to make amends for their idiotic actions had taught them much and forced them to endure much pain and trials.

She had noticed in the time she had been present in his room what his injury was doing to his body, while the bullet had gone straight through it still had shattered his collarbone and every breath brought forth a new wave of pain that he could not hide in his eyes. He was careful to sit still so as not to aggravate or jostle his injured right shoulder. Once she had found out it was the right and not the left shoulder that was injured she had turned to Winry.

The young blond haired woman had assured her that she had already gone over the automail ports and plates to check for any damage. She would need to replace the bolts and screws in her friends' collarbone and the upper left reach on his back but nothing extensive. A broken collarbone could not be surgically repaired but had to be nursed and cared for by the patients themselves.

She was sure that once her pain-wracked ex-student was told about that he was not going to like the news. Automail surgery was agonizing the first time around and considering his aversion to pain medication or sedatives he was likely to be awake and fully aware of the pain when the adjustments needed to be made.

"Edward," Izumi began causing the blond to look up at her curiously, she offered a small smile and reached forward to lay her hand over his right hand. She hardly thought anything about the automail; it was as much a part of her oldest student as his flesh and blood limbs. "How long before you're supposed to go through your training?"

Golden eyes widened as they looked at her, she smirked at seeing the confusion in his gaze, and obviously, he had not expected her to inquire about anything military related. However, while she would never join the army she wasn't so blind she could not see the difference that Ed made in the military. She also saw the positive effect the military had on her surrogate son, for him it was something stable in a time when he felt lost and alone.

"I don't know really, have no idea how much time this shit ate up."

"Well I would guess from what Alphonse has said that you have been unconscious for a day and a half and this makes it your third day in the hospital."

"Okay then, two weeks then and these damn doctors probably won't let me leave-"

"You may have to wait until that injury heals fully considering the physical demands."

"Great," the blond said with an exasperated sigh then added with a lot of irritation in his voice, "that means I am going to have to put up with that nosy bastard until then."

Izumi chuckled; she could see that irritation for what it truly was. Her student had long since shown signs of feeling something a bit more than comradeship for his ex-commanding officer. The anger and agitation was nothing but a mask he constantly wore to try to throw everyone else off the road to the truth. If he had yet to work things out with the older man then she was not going to say anything in that regard, her student was an adult and could work those issues out for himself.

She smirked when she noticed the narrowed eyed gaze she was receiving; of course, her student was aware that she knew. At first she had been completely against it, there was too much of an age gap, but as time passed and her original thoughts changed, she realized that Edward was hardly in control of how he felt. If not for her bringing up that particular notion to Riza Hawkeye's attention to assure to herself that this still unresolved and very strong attraction was something hidden from one another for years she would have said it was nothing but some sort of infatuation from years of working together. She knew that Roy Mustang was a good man because she could see that the woman who was loyal to him was as well but she had to be certain.

That had to add to the constant stress her student was dealing with, bottling up feelings was something of a bad habit that he had and it was about time he found someone or a possible candidate at least that he could trust enough with all the things troubling him. Right now however, she could see that he was in no position to open up to anyone around him. This way he continued to keep his distance from even his brother and the young woman who was very much like a sister to both boys; she knew was another of his bad habits. Best to hold back and protect those you care the most about than to let them see your sins or worse, your failures, as she was certain he felt his time in Rousia was.

All of these thoughts ran through her head from the times when she was his instructor and what she had learned about his characteristics from then and the times following that in a matter of seconds. So of course she was able to comment on his sour attitude with a stern tone of voice, "I'm sure you will make the best of it brat, just remember that killing him is likely to get you killed," she laughed at the look of disappointment on his face.

"That's the only damn reason he's still alive."

"I bet so," she was still smirking and could not help but notice how much more control the blond before her had gained over his anger. Xing really had been good for him; he was more alive and aware now than he had been when he had left them. She would have to give the Xingneese Prince her thanks for what he had done for her student.

"So, how was the young Prince when you left?"

She smiled at the blush that dusted those tan cheeks as he turned away from her and mumbled, "Fine."

"I'm sure you had the decency to leave on a good note, right?"

"Kinda, I didn't end up being banned from returning at least."

She laughed, "Well that is a good thing, at least you learned some tact."

"Hey, I've always had tact."

"The hell you have, you've always managed to put your foot in your mouth before, and that was on the best occasion."

"Bullshit, I managed to reason with you before."

"Oh, is that so? On what matter?"

"You know what I'm talking about."

Yes, she did know but she wanted him to say it, "I'm afraid you will have to refresh my memory."

"Your memory must be getting pretty bad you old hag-OW!"

Izumi resituated herself in her seat after having reached over to smack her ex-student upside the head for his last comment. "Brat."

"I'm injured here, did you have to hit so hard?"

"I didn't know you had grown soft while you were away."

"I did not-"

"Because I surely didn't hit you very hard at all, that was merely a love tap."

"Crazy-" he cut himself off at the knock to the door and they both looked over to see Al and Winry at the door. She nodded for them to come in and noticed out of the corner of her eye that while her second surrogate son and his wife entered the room that her eldest student had locked up, his defenses falling into place the moment he had seen them. That was what those two deserved considering their actions; they would have to work hard to get their brother to be more open with them. The youngest frowned at the site but said nothing about it only giving her an apologetic look.

"Hello brother, I didn't know if you needed another cup of coffee so I went ahead and grabbed one," golden eyes met bronze and they smiled, though the elders' smile was a bit strained as he accepted the offered coffee.

"Here you are Mrs. Curtis, a glass of orange juice as you asked," the dark haired woman accepted with a smile, "thank you Mrs. Elric," to which the blue-eyed young woman blushed. After she took a drink from her orange juice she added, "I've told you before that Izumi is quite alright Winry."

"Yes ma'am Izumi," she then took up residence in the other chair in the room, on the opposite side of Ed's bed as the older woman got to her feet and offered the chair to her younger student.

"You can keep your seat Teacher, I don't mind standing."

"Nonsense Alphonse, I wished to have a word with Mustang so take a seat."

Golden eyes looked at her sharply, "What do you want to talk to him for?"

"I don't see how that is any of your business."

"You're not-"

"Calm down kid, nothing to do with you," well not personal questions about her student anyway. He relaxed enough at her words and she stepped behind the chair the darker blond had finally seated himself in to brush the elders' bangs back and place a kiss on his forehead. He blushed and ducked his head and she leaned down to whisper low enough so as not be overheard, "Don't make everyone wait too long before you assure them you are alright Edward."

She pulled back just in time to see him give a hesitant nod and then she turned and exited the room. She was pleased to find both Mustang and Hawkeye still standing outside of the room. Sig looked her way and she offered him a sweet smile that silently let him know that her student was alright to which he nodded, she brushed her hand over his arm and closed the door behind her before she stepped over to the two officers and addressed them, "Now then, I would like to know what is going on."

Hawkeye and Mustang nodded and then attentive hazel eyes turned to her nodding in silent greeting before saying, "We are still working out the specifics and have several teams trying to figure out what exactly is going on. Edward pointed out a few of his own observations that have brought certain other points to our attention. However, we are still not completely certain of why this has occurred," the darker haired woman could sense the distaste in the other woman's tone. It was something they both had in common, best to have the facts and know what you are up against than to remain left grasping at straws.

"What happened exactly?"

"Myself and Fullmetal were having a heated discussion on the street outside of Sal's," she scowled, she didn't much care for the habit her student had picked up since he had gone missing but again he was an adult and could make his own decisions. The raven-haired man continued, "When someone opened fire on us, I acted on impulse and managed to avoid being hit as I moved both of us to a nearby alleyway. Of course our immediate thoughts were that someone was after my life and therefore Fullmetal refused to let me do anything." Coming from anyone else involving anyone other than her stubborn, too strong for his own good, surrogate son that statement would have sounded foolish, childish, and cowardly. Nevertheless, as all of them were aware, it was not so simple and without the presence of determination to get past Edward when he did not want you to.

"So how did he end up being shot, did he remain in the mouth of the alleyway?"

"Yes. He took out one of the would-be assassins with his alchemy before he was hit and then the Colonel arrived and the remaining enemies were taken care of." There was a bit of anger in his tone which she could understand, no adult would readily accept someone younger than them putting their lives on the line when they could readily and willingly do so themselves. Ed was far too young to have his life taken from him and yet he often times valued others' lives over his own and found himself in dangerous situations that endangered his life.

"Hmm, so another of his thoughtless and selfless actions led him to end up in the hospital. I heard from Alphonse that my idiotic ex-student is due to go through official military training," there was obvious distaste in her voice she would not allow herself to have around the student of which she was speaking. For his benefit alone, she had come to accept that the military was a part of her life, which did not mean that she had to like it herself. This is why she asked the next question, "Is this going to make it a longer time period before he goes?"

"Yes ma'am," the Colonel answered, "it is also known that the Lieutenant Colonel wishes to go through his training at North Headquarters."

"Near the Drachma Mountains, which are under the command of that woman?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so," Hawkeye offered.

"That is his decision, how long will it be if he doesn't go once his leave is over with?"

"He will have to wait another month or possibly two, as his acting C.O. at the moment that is the best I can offer. He will not be recovered enough to go this time around."

"Especially if he plans to go through that psychotic woman's' idea of training."

"I resent that Mrs. Curtis, I am hardly psychotic," all of them turned a bit alarmed to see the very General Armstrong they were speaking of walking over to them. Major Herth was walking behind her and offered a salute to the other two officers standing there as he came to stand before them. Hawkeye saluted him back as Mustang saluted back in recognition to the General's presence.

"To what do we owe the pleasure of your presence?"

"Can it flame, I was coming by to check on Fullmetal. Major Herth here informed me that our youngest State Alchemist was injured and I wanted to see if the injury was enough to prevent him going through my training regimen with my own eyes."

"Of course General."

Without another word they all watched as she turned for the door to Ed's room, the Major following after her, a familiar startled voice sounding before Al and Winry stepped out of the room. Following those events, the Major then exited the room, closing the door behind him, and then stood vigil over the door. Izumi wondered at that as well as the confused looks on her ex-students' and his wife's' face. All of them stood in the hallway in silence, each contemplating what the General could possibly being saying to Edward.

* * *

Back inside the too sanitary, white, expressionless, claustrophobic room, golden eyes watched warily as the General took a seat in the chair beside his bed and then her gaze turned to him expectantly. He sighed heavily wincing at the way the action jostled his shoulder. At least is wasn't bleeding anymore, though he was guessing about that since there was some dried blood on the bandaging, so it had to have been bleeding earlier since the nurse had changed the bandage pretty early this morning, Mustang had slept through that at least.

"I hear you wish to go through training in my territory."

"Uh, yeah."

"What is your status?"

"Shattered collar bone, right side, injured shoulder. Have to get some adjustments done to the automail once the bone heals."

"That injury is going to hold you back for at least a month, possibly two. I am not going to be held responsible for causing permanent damage to a wound you received before you arrived at my base."

"I figured that."

"Why?"

He looked at her startled, "Why what?"

"Don't act ignorant it doesn't suit you. Why not go through your training in an area you know, it would be the sensible decision. If you are making such a decision because you wish to run from your problems, which includes discussing your past with your family and Flameboy and his group then I refuse to allow you to go through training on my base. I will not have a coward in my command."

"That isn't the whole reason," he couldn't help but feel ashamed because if he was honest with himself that was part of the reason. He should have known she was going to say something like that.

"Since you are currently on leave I will give you one more chance to apply for my training. Once you return from your leave, I will want a reason that does not involve any cowardice. You have two months to recover and I am giving you that much because you just returned from a two year assignment and I do not want an injured kid in my command. "

"Yes ma'am."

"I also expect you to have made amends with those you care for, which are currently present here, before you begin your training wherever you end up going through with it. I will not stand to have a child mixed in with soldiers."

That one stung but he knew she was right, even so he didn't think he was up to talking to anyone in that short of time about what she really meant he should discuss with them; "Ah-"

"Or I will simply send your sorry ass to South Headquarters."

"Yes ma'am."

"Good, now rest up and heal. I want you to report to me when you are released. You left far too many holes in your last report for my liking."

"Yes ma'am."

She rose to her feet and headed for the door pausing to say over her shoulder, "Welcome back Lieutenant Colonel."

"Thank you ma'am."

He watched her go and sank down in his bed hissing when his injured shoulder sent a shot of needles through his side and causing him to jolt upright. He heard the General saying something to someone outside and noticed that a couple of voices sounded like his brother and Winry. When his brother and sister-in-law reentered the room he glanced at them and sighed, "How is Anna doing?"

He couldn't help but smile at the way both of their eyes lit up, it always reminded him of Hues when he saw the love and happiness in their eyes at the mention of their daughter. He could start with trying not to be so distant with his only family. He didn't feel like he had to watch how much he said as much around Izumi, she was an adult after all and it was time he accepted that Winry and Al were too. But he was just going to start out small, catching up seemed safe enough.

"She misses you but we can't bring her up here to see you. She tells us all the time that she loves you and hopes you get better soon. She has been practicing drawing circles. Elysia and Gracia are doing their best to keep her spirits up."

"We're glad you're alright brother."

"Yeah, though being shot sucks, glad I slept through the worst of it."

"Brother-"

Ed held up his hand to stop his younger brother from saying what his expression already was, "Don't, I know you were just worried and I'm sorry that I'm just not ready to talk to anyone about anything yet."

"Edward, we shouldn't have-"

He narrowed his eyes at his best friend stopping her from continuing, "I already said don't so . . . don't. I know that the three of us swore not to keep any secrets between us but right now I need to okay?"

"Okay brother," the younger Elric said with a gentle and understanding smile. Some of the tension finally eased throughout Ed and he let out a sigh of relief, "Not forever, just until I get used to being around everyone and back in Central again."

"Okay brother," this time Al's voice was stronger as he placed his hand over his brothers' in a comforting gesture. "It's alright brother, we won't push. Nevertheless, everyone is glad to have you back and see that you're as alright as you can be. I'm content with that, now."

A smile, a real smile that lit golden eyes appeared on his face as Ed started to feel like he really had returned. He cleared his throat and decided on a change of topic, "So . . . how about telling me what you two have been up to while I was gone, other than the obvious seeing as how you have a daughter now," he ended his statement with a smirk.

"Brother," Al said in exasperation and with a blush on his face to which his wife mirrored.

"We have been traveling lately, going between Rush Valley, here, and Resembool. We spend most of our time in Rush Valley though."

"Really, I wander why. How is everyone doing there anyway?"

Winy had glared at him for his sarcasm but answered anyway, "Paninya is coming along in her training; she decided to train as an automail mechanic. Mr. Dominic is still the same as ever."

"Winry has taken over the business and opened a branch here in Central. Granny is why we go back to Resembool so often."

Ed nodded, "How is that old hag?"

Winry glared at him again, this hostility was what made him avoid a relationship other than friendship with his childhood friend.

Al once again jumped in between them, "Granny is doing well. She still gets regular customers, but Central and Rush Valley is where the most customers come. Seth actually returned home and is helping Granny now. He gets to keep learning about medicine with the added bonus of learning about automail too."

"Really, that freckle faced loser finally gave up on traveling?"

"He gave up a few years before you two did, or don't you remember?"

"Yeah brother, it was in that small town, he went home shortly after that. When you were running a fever and we had no other choice but to stick around for a few days."

"Yeah I remember, that crazy doctor kept telling me I had to rest all the time-"

"That's because you needed to rest brother. He said that because you were always set on pushing yourself too hard that was why you were so sick. You still do that."

"I have been telling him that for years Al, a prime example was right after you got the automail attached. You pushed yourself so hard you were spitting up blood."

"We had things to do and I didn't have the luxury of taking my sweet time," Ed replied with a glare directed at both of them as though as much should have been obvious.

"Yeah, yeah, we know," Winry replied offhandedly.

"Was there anything good that you wouldn't mind sharing? It would be nice to know what you're willing to tell us about what has been going on in your life these last two years."

Ed sighed and gave his brother a gentle smile, "Alright Al, I guess I can tell you that much at least."

Al and Winry exchanged smiles before they looked back to him expectantly; Ed glanced at the door to make sure it was closed before he tried to get as comfortable as he could. At least he didn't have to worry too much, about what they would think about his sexuality, which was already known to the two family members before him. Telling them about Ling and how different it was living in Xing would be easy as long as he avoided anything too personal involving him and Ling.

"Oh, I know that look; you're debating what's safe to tell us and what isn't so that means you definitely have something to tell us."

"Winry," Al interrupted but at the smirk on his brothers' face, he dropped the reprimand.

"Yeah, I am actually because I'm sure you don't want all the details of what's running through my mind," there was a mischievous glint to those golden eyes that had Winry perking up in interest and Al wanting to sigh at his brothers' troublesome ways. However, all the younger Elric could do was smile at the change; it was nice to see his brother was slowly coming back to himself.

"I'm married and a mother now so I doubt even you could gross me out Edward Elric," Al doubted his wife would win this one despite the confidence in her voice and expression at that declaration.

"Really," Al did sigh at the tone of his brothers' voice then, it was softer spoken and whatever his brother was going to say next was sure to be something he would rather not hear. "I could tell you about this time Ling and I-"

"Whoa, wait a minute, you and Ling? When did that happen?"

The entire conversation had headed in an entirely different direction. They both already knew that Ed was gay and they weren't ashamed of it, Al knew where his brothers' interest really lay and he wished the two of them would work out their differences and admit their feelings to each other already but that was too much to hope for now. He leaned back in his seat and got comfortable, his brother would never divulge in the actual details, he was excessively shy and private when it came to his sex life. If he and Winry hadn't of been married and had a child he would have been blushing himself from just thinking that much.

"It wasn't anything serious so don't look at me like that. It was just a fling-"

"But with Ling, I had no idea he swung the same way you do-"

"Hey! What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Well come on Ed, you're gay."

"I am not gay. I like girls just as much-"

"You do, but not me?"

"Hell no, you're a psychopathic, cynical, machine geek why would I like you?"

"You stubborn, hard headed, alchemy geek."

Al sighed audibly now, so his brother and his wife were at least back to normal again but he needed to stop this before they ended up getting carried away as they always did. Before he could interrupt them, however his brother changed the subject.

"That's beside the point; you're married and have a kid now. I'm not committed and don't plan to be anytime soon and sure as hell wasn't while in Xing."

"Oh is that so, I heard Ling wanted you to be present for all dealings between the two countries, that sounds pretty committed to me Edward," there was that teasing tone in her voice that often times made his brother mad. It did seem as though the two could keep from ripping their heads off now without his help, at least that had changed over the years. That was good because really he felt they were too old to need him to baby-sit them now.

"That's because that damn prince is a leech and he's damn clingy to add to it."

"Is that so, he was awfully clingy with you when we first met him. Did you two really wait until you went to Xing to have a fling?"

"Yes and yes, don't be so perverted Winry."

"Oh hush up; you're the one sitting here bragging about having all these flings while you were in Xing."

"This is why I don't tell you anything, you always turn it around on me."

"Whatever, get over yourself. Did you finally learn to have some manners at the least?"

Ed glared at her, but it was closer to a pout as he said, "I never needed to learn manners."

"Right," the sarcasm in her tone was thick enough to slice with a knife. "You've always had as much manners as a wild boar."

"And you've always had as much charm as a wild dog."

"Asshole."

"Bitch."

"Brother, Winry, please try to be nicer."

"Indeed, such language is very crude," a new voice said from the doorway. She was a nice looking young woman, a few years older than they were with brown eyes and hair and pale skin. She was wearing the standard white nurses' uniform. The three of them looked up to see that there was a nurse greeting them. She was carrying a tray of food as she came into the room. At the corner of the tray were two small plastic cups with a pair of pills in each of them. Winry had moved over to the chair opposite her husband once she and Ed had started relaxing and talking to one another. The nurse maneuvered around Al to set the tray on the table next to the bed before she gently helped Ed into a better position so that he could eat.

"You're still on a specific diet, but by tomorrow you should be able to handle something a bit more solid," she said as she set the tray on Ed's lap. She backed away and with a smile to Winry and Al she said, "Make sure he eats all of his dinner and takes his meds afterwards," she turned to regard her patient again who was looking at his dinner as though it would jump up and attack him. "I will be back to check your vitals and change your bandages in a little while then you need to get your rest."

"Um, will it be a problem if I stay here with him tonight," Al asked before the nurse turned to leave.

She nodded with a smile, "Yes, that's quite alright."

"Thank you."

* * *

Inside the nearly empty and thus quiet cafeteria, Izumi leaned against her husband sitting next to her in a booth tucked into a corner of the place. Mustang was sent home by Hawkeye soon after their arrival but the woman herself had stayed behind along with General Armstrong, together they had decided to go and get some lunch once they felt confident that the three Elric's were working out their differences. Now the Curtis' had the full weight of what was going on and what the elder Elric had been through on their shoulders. Olivia had not spared them anything of what she knew and it weighed heavily on Izumi's heart that her surrogate son had been through so very much.

"He is far too proud and too scarred but what he was put through to tell anyone of his experiences away from us all. But as you two are the closest thing those boys have to parents in this world I felt you deserved to know."

She calmly took a sip of her tea after she said that, the silence had already stretched on for a while before she had broken it. Hawkeye sat stunned but with that ever present mask of calm still on her face. She has said nothing but her eyes had indeed betrayed how much it hurt to listen to what the eldest woman at the table had to say. There were moments where anger would darken those copper eyes of hers but Izumi could feel that anger at the same moments and the heartache at the other moments. Right now, she could only sit next to her husband and take it all in, try not to lose her composure, or stomp upstairs and demand to know why her ex-student kept all of it inside and tried to act like nothing had happened.

"When he came to my base I never thought I would ever see someone so very desperate and driven to live. There were times when he wanted to give up but he would bully himself into going on because he is far too dedicated to those two in his room right now. I worry that after seeing that his brother has moved on with his life and is healthy and happy that he will no longer care as much about making himself continue going on."

"That's because he is an idiot," Izumi couldn't help but to say even if a little brokenly than normally. Sig tightened his arm around her shoulders and kissed her forehead and she offered him a weak smile before closing her eyes and taking a deep breath to get back her composure.

"You plan on allowing him to go through your training don't you Olivia?"

"Yes I do," the female General replied to her question, "however, I am not going to go easy on him or play favorites. I will test him and push him; if he cannot handle it then he is likely to lose his creditability as an officer of the Amestrian military. I know of his past, of his sins, and of his hardships. I will also have the opportunity to see how strong he is and with one like him taking pity on him for any reason will have no results at all. He doesn't need to be babied or sympathized with, he needs to get past what he has gone through and move on with his life. Right now he is stuck in a hole that has just grown the further away he pushes those who care for him; this is why I believe going through my training regimen would be the best thing for him."

"When you point things out in that light I happen to agree with you," at least by now she had regained her composure. It did help that this was indeed the longest amount Olivia had ever spoken and that it allowed her to calm herself. She looked to Hawkeye once more and was pleased to see that the woman was indeed a woman of strength and logic, she also appeared to agree with the General and the squeeze from her husband let her know that he also agreed with what was being said. She placed a hand over his resting on her shoulder and looked up at him with a smile before sharing a short kiss.

She turned to the General and nodded to her, "When the time comes that he falls under your care I hope you can get through his thick head and make him start moving forward again."

"I am confident that I can, he was your student before he will become mine."

"Your student ma'am?"

The General smirked as she regarded the Colonel, "Yes Colonel. I will tell you what your General was already informed of. It seems that our government wishes to take full advantage of having such an influential and powerful alchemist within their grasp. I plan to also prepare him for that and further instill his already strong sense of self."

The housewife smiled a sad smile, "I hope you can help him learn who he is once more."

"That is a task I surely hope he and I are up to accomplishing."

_To be continued . . .  
_


	10. Chapter Nine

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N:This story is one I am trying a different writing style with and that has a deep rooted plotline that will gradually become known. Nonetheless, I hope this chapter is enjoyed and happy reading._

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed **  
**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure **  
**Spoilers: All of them for this story.**  
**Series: FMA **  
**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall) **  
**Status: Work In Progress **  
_**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed  
**_

_

* * *

Patience is as much a virtue as trust can prove to be._

**Chapter 9**

_**Two Weeks Later . . .**_

Finally, he was finally released from the damn hospital and of course now that he was on medical leave to recover from his damn injuries he was informed by both Generals that he had to attend his damn psychology evaluation since he wasn't much use as a field operative at the moment. Pointing out that he was getting along with his brother and sister-in-law now did nothing to dissuade anyone of making him go. He had to go because it was procedure, policy, the rules or whatever the hell they wanted to call it that he go to see that damn quack because he'd just returned from a two year long mission in another country.

He did just fucking fine in Xing but that wasn't good enough for the higher ups. Since when did they care about his well being anyway? They hadn't cared when they sent him on dangerous missions that could have gotten him and Al killed and they sure as hell did not care so much when Bradley was running the country. What was worse was that he knew everyone, Mustang, his teacher, the old General Holigan, and the crazy Olivia Armstrong herself were planning something behind his back but he couldn't prove what it was. Thinking about it only pissed him off more than he already was so he was stuck just watching them and seeing what he could find out.

This was utter bullshit, his right arm was in a sling to allow his still healing collar bone time to heal and because the arm was useless without the bolts in place, trying to use it was agonizing because the wires all crossed without anything holding the damn thing in place at his shoulder so sling it was. Funny how easy it is to forget how much you rely on something until you can no longer use it. He was right handed but through the years of not having the same dexterity as his flesh hand he'd become left handed, his handwriting had suffered the most because of that but he could already do everything else left handed now. That didn't make it any less frustrating to not use his right hand and of course Winry had removed the bolts herself and told him he'd just have to wait for his collar bone to heal up before he could rely on the automail arm for a while.

At least he wasn't bedridden anymore which was a plus since that drove him batshit crazy staying in bed doing absolutely nothing. Sure he could read, but even that got to be infuriating and made him restless so that only lasted for a few days. Then there was also that his niece and Elysia could trap him and ask him questions about everything, why did the moon turn red sometimes, why was the sun golden yellow, why did he have the same color eyes as the sun, why this and that, it made him crazy. Now he had some peace since he got to walk to the damn medical building alone but he wasn't looking forward to where he was going.

He knew the office all too well and without anyway to prove that this woman was the same as the one that had attacked Mustang and Hawkeye there was no way of convincing anyone to not make him go from that angle. They still didn't have any leads that would tell them why the attack happened or why the hell whoever it was hadn't killed him. No way to say for sure that Mustang was or wasn't a target or where they would strike next. Nothing at all and that made this damn recovery even longer because he was still being followed by soldiers, at least it wasn't Breda or Havoc or anyone else he knew this time. He could only take so much of their taunting and theorizing about what the hell was going on and the investigation at least kept everyone busy including that arrogant bastard.

He let out a sigh when he came up to the building, five damn floors and it was a hospital on top of that which he hated about the place even more. The office he was going to was on the top floor and so he went inside and could hear the click of uniform shoes on the tile floor as he made his way to the elevator, at least science managed to create those things, he wasn't feeling up to walking up five flights of stairs. His energy was less than he liked after being stuck in bed for a week and a half to recuperate. He hated injuries because then he had to rest and the pain sucked as well.

Of course the two nameless soldiers got on the elevator with him and one of them, a young guy actually younger than him asked, "Sir, what floor?"

"It's five, don't tell me you've never been here private," the other soldier said with irritation in his voice, he was older than both of them but Ed could care less. The privilege of his rank was getting away with saying things like, "Just be quiet would ya," and ignoring the glare sent his way by the corporal. Being a Lieutenant Colonel now had only a bit more privilege than being a major did which wasn't enough to get him out of this. The elevator made that annoying ding that let them know they had reached the fifth floor and he got off and turned left to go to the end where he had to make a right to get to the door at that end of the hallway.

He hated this place, detested it even without the hospital smell they had on the lower floors present he still couldn't stand to be here. This woman gave him the creeps and it was pointless to hold back from saying anything because she had his damn files and was a psychologist so that made her about as psychic as fucking Mustang was. She seemed to know what the written words didn't say and she had this suicidal tactic of pissing him off to get him to lose control and end up saying more than he intended. Which was why his sessions with her lasted two hours, with one last glare at the two following him he walked inside the waiting room, up to the window to sign in and of course since he was on time it only took five minutes before he was called to go to that witches' office.

He did smirk when the secretary informed the two soldiers that they weren't allowed to go with him, ha, they could wait bored out of their minds in the waiting room then. Breda usually had a chess board; Havoc flirted endlessly as did Herth for that matter. These two thought they'd get to eavesdrop huh, too damn bad.

Everyone he was used to knew they were going to be stuck waiting. He walked around the curving wall to the room at the back knowing that this woman s' office was spacious enough to not be suffocating, had two couches, one on the left hand side of the door and another a few steps in front of the door which was across from her usually packed desk.

There was a bookshelf with pointless books for her profession filling the shelves and the degrees were on the walls along with a calendar that she wrote down her appointments on. So when he knocked, was told to come in, and did so he closed the door and took residence at the couch across from her. It offered an escape route if she pissed him off too much and allowed him to watch her at the same time. Pretty convenient at times unless she was looking at him like she was know, he would have crossed his arms if he could but since he couldn't he just glared at her. She wasn't bad to look at if you liked conniving, sneaky, deceitful women.

Blond hair tied back in a pony tail that should have made her look younger but actually fit her fairly well, black rimmed glasses that reminded him of Shezka, bright blue, almost crystalline eyes, pale skin, and a nice figure if you liked the candidate for psychopath type. But the difference with her and other woman was the way she always dressed so damn elegantly, like she was some high class snob which he didn't doubt she was. White blouse with a black skirt today and some necklace he couldn't make out the pendant to.

"What in the world happened to you, you look as though you were hit by a car," but that was where her elegance stopped, she had this habit of speaking to him straight forwardly most of the time which made it pretty damn hard to get too angry at her. But he still didn't like her and sure as hell didn't trust her, "I did."

"No you didn't, I heard there was an attempt at your life," there was also that, she always knew the damn truth so he could lie all he wanted and she would correct him and then make some comment, ask questions about it that pertained to why he lied and they would move on. He hated it when she went back to asking about his past, especially the most recent blow he'd gone through in Rousia. That always made him want to push her out the window her desk was placed in front of.

"How is that investigation going by the way?"

"Nowhere."

"Hmm, that seems to be the same way this meeting is going so far as well," there now she was smirking and the arrogance this woman had reminded him far too much of Mustang who he still needed to cuss out and insult for the way he'd acted that morning before they were shot at.

"Can I leave then?"

She laughed, "Certainly not. Now I believe Generals' Mustang and Holigan requested you to have a few sessions with me concerning how you're handling what you went through in Rousia and to inquire about your time spent in Xing. It would seem that a young officer like yourself is very important to the Amestrian military."

"Apparently so. Dealing fine, Xinghan was fine."

"Aw, short and to the point then? That's alright with me. I believe there was a certain incident in Xing that led me to believe you are very far from fine. In fact it may suggest that by your lack of action you are suffering just as much now as you were during your time as a prisoner."

"The hell do you know anyway?"

"I know from previous sessions that you have the unhealthy tendency to bottle things up and keep them to yourself. From your files this is a new development that you acquired from the time in Rousia. From what I read you were actually quite impulsive with an explosive personality. Recently I've found that you have become calmer and more docile than before, while that is definitely a positive thing it is also detrimental to you. Holding in your emotions and confiding in no one will only make what you are bottling up even harder to handle when they resurface."

"So what I should trust you and confide in you then?"

"That is your decision, if not myself then someone you trust to be able to help you through your difficult past."

"Cool, I'll do that and we won't have to have-"

"Not so fast. I still need a statement from you about how you are dealing with things Edward."

"Of course. I'm dealing with things just fine and don't need some quack doctor telling me how to live my life."

"It is rather pleasing to hear you say that, the last time I saw you it was an entirely different reaction you displayed."

Yeah he remembered that session from two years ago before he practically begged to go to Xing as a Liaison. He'd opened up alright, damn near fucking lost it because she just kept pressing and saying exactly what was going through his mind when he was beyond stable and he had a mental breakdown. That was embarrassing as hell and he was not repeating it no matter what she said to him.

"How did you feel about seeing your family after two years?"

"Fine, good to see them again."

"Hmm, you weren't feeling jealous about seeing your brother had a normal life, a wife and child, a home?"

"Hell no, that's what I always wanted for Al. To be happy and healthy."

"That's good. What about your co-workers, how did you feel about seeing them again?"

"Fine, good to see them again too."

"Hmm," damn she must have seen something in his expression or whatever she managed to see that told her he was telling her a lie. Maybe he hated her so much because she reminded him of Mustang, this uncanny ability to know when he was lying and to see through it every single time.

"Are you sure you weren't apprehensive, feeling nervous about them expecting you to be the exact same as before or maybe even expecting you to be worse off than you were before you left?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever."

"Edward."

"What?"

"Which was it, nervous, apprehensive; did you feel the same way about meeting your family once again?"

Damn her and the way she worded shit; "Nervous I guess, didn't know what they'd think or what had changed."

"Does change make you feel uncomfortable?"

"No."

"How about suspicious, as though no matter how good the change may be that something bad may come and tear it all away?"

She was good and he scowled at the window behind her, "Life's not fair and change is inevitable."

"That's true, but do you feel as though you can never have or deserve happiness?"

That was twice now; he was going to start yelling soon if she didn't quit hitting the nail on the head like that; "Can live with it."

"That's not what I asked. Do you feel as though you don't deserve happiness?"

"Who the hell cares, why do you care anyway," now he was getting defensive, great that made three points to her. He really, really hated these sessions and should take lying lessons from Mustang or something so he could convince her he was perfectly fucking fine so she would leave him alone.

"Why wouldn't you deserve happiness Edward? Do you think that even after correcting your sins that the things that happened since then were somehow your fault?"

Fucking hell, where did she come up with this shit anyway? He didn't answer just shrugged his uninjured soldier, of course she was writing down the questions, answers, mannerisms, she always cataloged every thing and of course his two C.O.'s received copies that were condensed and let them know what was going on with him which was annoying. At least if he ever developed a social life he could keep that mostly to himself.

"I would think the fact that you survived what your were put through and also managed to escape would make you realize that your are far from weak. Combined with all you had faced up until that point it is most obvious to those around you that you are a very strong, determined, and often selfless young man."

Okay, now she was complimenting him like he had self esteem issues, whatever. He didn't need her to tell him what everyone else expected from him; he knew it already, played the part pretty damn well most the time except for lately. He wasn't willing to make anyone walk down that barricaded road from the time he was a prisoner, a slave in Rousia, because no one needed to bare that burden with him, he could handle it.

Except Ling had pointed it out, proven it to him that he really couldn't but he wanted to try because why was he going to place that on someone s shoulders like he had Ling? Now that guy was protective as all hell like he was some helpless kid when he wasn't, he could fight his own battles and he sure as fuck didn't need some prince or some Flame Alchemist made General to do it. Al and Winry were out of the question, he'd never tell them because they had each other and their kid to worry about and he was going to be just fine. As for this woman, no way in hell was he saying more than he had to. It wasn't any of her business and she knew way too damn much about him as it was.

"Another matter that concerns me is of course whether or not you've had any desire to date."

Like that wasn't awkward, what business of hers' was it whether he dated or not? Ling had made him accompany him on dates, mostly because he was supposed to accompany the prince everywhere anyway but the guy was determined to get him to date. Apparently he had to get over all that shit in Rousia and dating had something to do with that. Yes, it had helped and he'd learned more than a few things about himself that he wouldn't have if he hadn't tried. Now that he was back in Central however he didn't feel much like dating anyone.

"Why?"

"Because you are fine young man and with so much of your childhood cast in hardship and adult responsibilities I think it would be good for you to try and realize some of the finer things in life."

"Whatever."

"There was an interesting rumor I heard, were you romantically involved with the Prince you were charged with working alongside?"

He blushed and he cursed at the reaction as he looked away and muttered, "So what?"

"Well then," she laughed softly, "that answers that question. Perhaps while you are here you will be able to pursue your hearts' desire."

"Uh huh," he muttered indifferently.

"Now then, time to get to the more serious questions."

"What the hell, like what you haven't asked me already isn't personal enough as it is."

"Edward, we'll start with some simple questions. How are you sleeping at night?"

"Fine," he answered quickly, he was when he had pills shoved down his throat that knocked him out anyway. He never actually slept very well at night that was why he took naps. Maybe that was why Mustang was always sleeping in the office, bad nights, and nightmares plaguing him like they did Ed. Why the fuck was he thinking about having any sympathy for that guy anyway?  
"I can see that you have been resting more than usual, but the circles under your eyes indicate that you have much trouble sleeping. Is it nightmares that keep you from getting any actual rest Edward?"

'Well isn't she observant,' he thought snidely then answered, "Everyone has nightmares, big deal."

"Well a lot of people do, but only those who truly have horrors in their past actually have nightmares so often they effect their health. What are your nightmares about?"

"Homicidal dancing cats, you know cuz Al had this thing about wanting to adopt cats on the road all the time," he replied sarcastically, he was not telling her about his nightmares. She could keep looking at him like that all day if she wanted. His nightmares were of his own creation, well they were of others' creation since he'd stopped having nightmares about that night they tried to bring back their mother when he'd restored Al. Regardless it wasn't any of this woman s' business.

"Alright then, I can simply write up a report that says you are unable to return to duty due to failure to comply with medical orders . . .

Fucking bitch! "Fine damn it, it varies."

"How so?"

"You know, like dreaming that Al will be taken away, being turned into a s-slave again, things like that. Happy?"

She had that stern look; it reminded him of his teacher back in Resembool, that crazy lady used to throw chalk at him in class when he did something she didn't like. Well he deserved it sometimes he could admit, putting worms in the girls' lunches, transmuting the books into huge spit balls to throw at the board, he actually missed those days. See he could let his mind wander while she lectured him about how he should stop being so difficult and just answer the questions so that both of their lives could be made easier for the next hour he had left in this damn session.

"Next question doc."

That gave her pause, he hardly ever instigated moving on with this crap, but at least it stopped the lecture she was going through. She cleared her throat and nodded once then asked, "How is it that you bore the weight of what surely felt was the world on your shoulders during your journey to recover your brother?"

He shrugged; he really didn't know the answer to that so he ventured a guess, "Determination, will power, hell if I know."

"Wouldn't you believe that it had to do with having your brother by your side the entire time? Does one not draw strength from those around them, reminding them what they are fighting and struggling to accomplish?"

"Sure, that sounds about right."

Again with the nod and then she had the audacity to ask, "How can you continue to bear the weight of knowing in your own selfish, naive, and childish way that your brother had to pay such a high price for what you forever feel was your sin?"

This was why he hated her, she brought what he said during his outbursts back around to bite him in the ass when he least expected it. That was a low blow and he had to take a moment to keep from ripping her apart to answer the question; "Because I corrected it."

"But he still lost years of his life."

"No he didn't, he . . . " he knew that she was right and that was what bothered him the most. He also knew why she did this shit; instead of trying to prove to him that he wasn't completely at fault she grilled him until he proved himself wrong. "He, he did . . . he was alive, he still saw everyone and was there and learned . . . he was alive this entire time . . ." How the hell could he justify something that was entirely his own damn fault? That was stupid, he couldn't, there was no way and he didn't see why Al didn't resent him for taking that time away from him. Why didn't he anyway, he wouldn't have been able to if he'd been in Al's position instead because it was Al and he would have more than deserved not being able to breath, to fear, to eat, to touch and feel . . .

"How does it feel knowing that after your mothers' death that you caused her pain beyond the grave? Have you atoned for that Edward?"

"Yes, it wasn't her and I got Al back . . . it wasn't her," he knew that because he and Pinako had dug up the remains of that night and it wasn't her. He hadn't killed his mother; he never had because he was a fool. But he was grateful for that even though it had cost him and Al so much for nothing but he'd corrected that to. He was past this; those demons were laid to rest. "It's over," he said firmly, "I can never undo it but I kept my promise. My brother is happy, healthy, and whole again and he has a family of his own now. That's all I ever wanted."

"What about for yourself Edward," her voice was softer now and he couldn't stand that, it was the voice a mom used when talking to a distraught child and she was not his mother so she shouldn't talk to him like that.

"What about me, how about you, are you happy, are you doing what you want? Do you enjoy ripping open old wounds and dissecting them you damn bitch?"

"That's enough Edward," now her voice was stern, he liked that tone much better. He couldn't stand that soft, motherly, caring tone in this woman s' voice, it brought back the pain of how much he still missed his mom which reminded him that he and Al were truly orphans' now. Their father, even though he left, was dead as well, sacrificed his life to save Amestrius along with a few others, like Scar and nearly Izumi and Mustang had done. The moment they had undone what father had done his father had cured the blindness that the gate cursed Mustang with for so short a time with what energy he had left after he and his father had clawed their way back from the gate with Al's body, mind, and soul as one.* He didn't know what Mustang and his father had talked about but it was something that caused his then C.O. to get pretty pissy when he'd called his father a bastard for leaving them again.

"Don't act like you care when you're just doing your job and sure as hell don't talk to me like some mom would," he snapped angrily.

She drew back leaning back in her chair and nodding, probably writing down the outburst but he didn't care. She'd better step off this road before he said fuck it and left. He'd rather talk about just about anything else other than his mom; he'd never stop missing her.

"How do you feel about the lives you've changed, taken, or had a negative or positive effect on?"

How the hell did she know he'd killed anyone, no one knew that, it wasn't in a report or he would have been charged with it*. She raised an eyebrow at him, "Don't tell me that during all the chaos on the Promised Day you didn't kill anyone or even before that when you were listed M.I.A. Perhaps even after all of that you had to have taken a life, and you have had a profound effect on people, especially in Xinghan and Amestrius."

"Right, wasn't intentional or anything its' just the way it happened."

"Are you saying that the choices you made that affected others are not your responsibility?"

"No. I was just saying that I . . . I didn't want any of the shit that was going on to kill anyone but it did and I can't make up for that. Some of the-" damn it he was doing it again, justifying his actions because of what she was saying, "negative effects were because of me but I have to live with that. I can't change what s' already happened."

"Exactly, so why not turn to someone about what has already been done to you? You were made into nothing more than a slave in Rousia, which had to have had a profound effect on you. I can see that it has just from going through your mission reports, your files. Your personality has changed so drastically that I am not surprised those around you are concerned."

"Yeah, well shit happens, people change, and sorry I'm not what everyone expects."

"You're not sorry and you have no reason to be. But you will need to stop holding it in and keeping it to yourself or it will destroy you."

"The hell it will-"

"I know you have been through so very much already and survived but one can only make it through so much before they shatter."

"What the hell would you know?"

"More than you think Edward," there was what he could swear was genuine sincerity in her voice as she spoke those words. But he wouldn't meet her eyes, it was damn near impossible for him to lie when he looked someone in the eye. "Let me ask you this then, do you feel that the wrongs and sins you've committed eclipse the good you've done?"

What kind of backlash question was that? No, he didn't think so but how could he know for certain to begin with. He decided on a shrug, "I don't know," he answered honestly.

"I think you do know, I think you are not certain but that you hope you've done more good in the world than bad."

'I played a part in both destroying and saving Amestrius, that s' pretty elliptical to me.' "I guess so."

"Do you feel like all the good you've gained is equivalent to sacrifices you've made?"

"Yes, I have Al back."

"Even now, after you had to sacrifice so much in captivity just to stay alive?"

That was a tough one and did he think after all that it was worth it? He got to see Al, Winry, and Anna, was there when they married and he and Ling got along well enough now. He had friends so he guessed that maybe it was worth it but did he feel that yet? Al, Winry, and Anna, yes, it was worth it to come back to them and see for himself that the world had not gone to hell in a hand basket again. Everyone was alright and he got to see that for himself, "Yes."

She smiled then and he scowled, he hated that damn smile, it meant he said something she approved of. What the hell ever he only had thirty minutes to go before he got out of this damn place. "How do you feel about having your automail permanently?

That was a change of pace, simple enough question, another left shouldered shrug, "I'm fine with it. Knew it was going to turn out that way anyway."

"You did, how did you know?"

"Cause I'm a genius."

"Edward."

"Because I'm not stupid, it wasn't worth the risk to try and get them back so I didn't bother trying. I'm fine with it and if no one else is then tough luck because I don't care. I was the one that fucked up and ended up with automail and for once I'm the only one suffering the consequences of my actions and that's just peachy with me."

"Do you always hold yourself in such low regards? Why must you alone suffer while you cannot stand to have those around you suffer?"

"Because usually I'm the one that instigated whatever the hell can make others suffer."

"And your life, do you hold no value for your own life? Do you believe that your sacrifices are so small in comparison to the ones others make?"

"If my life has to end to save someone else or save them pain then fine. Mine are small because I bring them onto myself."

"That is . . . you should hold your life in higher regard. Wouldn't those you leave behind suffer if you were lost to them? Do you not think that by suffering yourself that you are causing those who care for you pain?"

He paused at that, yes he thought of that but he was sparing them pain by keeping it to himself . . . only he was a complete and utter hypocrite. He always demanded answers from those he knew, didn't let Al or Winry suffer needlessly or alone growing up but now they had each other and what was he left with? Ling had told him it was alright to share the burdens' of ones' life with another because then you gave them the hope they needed that somehow they could help or lessen your suffering. It was a show of compassion and trust to share your demons with another and it was truly uplifting to find someone who would accept all of you and not just bits and pieces.

His mother had to have known about his father, she was his wife so she had to have known. He didn't register that he was being watched as his mind raced through scenario after scenario, she had known and yet she had loved him anyway even after he'd left them she continued to love him with her very last breath. That was what it meant to accept all of a person, to accept their flaws no matter what, to accept that their intentions were pure and good even if it hurt in the end. He did know why his father had left, knew after things began with the humunculi that things were more complicated and bigger than they seemed.

He was doing the same thing in a different way than his father with his actions, pushing everyone away and back, distancing himself because he didn't trust them with the truth. He didn't want them to see what it had done to him to be reduced to nothing but a powerless whipping boy. He was supposed to be strong, supposed to break free and he had but like a dog would have, digging himself out and dragging himself away, running away like a coward because that was what he was reduced to. It was worse than that time he thought he was as good as dead after Kimblee had blown up that damn warehouse in the North.

He had to snap out of it, pull back from those thoughts before he lost himself in them again. This wasn't the time or place and he was not letting himself fall apart in front of her again. He took in a deep breath and was grateful his injury was healing because that hurt a lot less now than it had two weeks ago.

"I wish you would stop beating yourself up and believe that those around you are trustworthy when it comes to the things that plague you. Believe them when they tell you that you deserve happiness and peace as much as you believe they do Edward. Don't keep this all to yourself forever."

"Is that it, can I go?"

"You may go and I will send a satisfactory report that you are well enough mentally and emotionally to return to active duty as soon as your physical injuries heal."

"Yeah, thanks," he said distractingly as he stood up and headed for the door pausing when she said to him, "Take care of yourself and try to keep yourself out of the kind of trouble that brings you back to my office."

"Uh, sure," he turned towards her, "does that mean you won't make me come back here then?"

"Only when your C.O.'s order it does it happen. I do want you to engage in social activities involving your colleagues, friends, and family but there really is no need for you to come back presently."

"Cool, see ya," that was a relief because she was getting way too damn good at reading him and he didn't like it. She always gave him the creeps, like she was much more than she seemed. But the only thing he noticed when he did look at her that was similar were the eyes. Sure she had the same build and her hair color was a shade darker but he still suspected her even with those subtle differences, like her attitude and demeanor. She was a psychologist after all, surely someone in her profession could mimic a split personality and change of state was simple, hell you could buy hair die at the store.

He went back out to the waiting room and the two waiting for him stood up immediately looking relieved to see him before they looked bored again. He scoffed and waved at the secretary as he walked out the door and headed back to the elevator. He was going out tonight, he was still on leave and he could use a damn drink after putting up with the mental quack for two hours. Plus, she'd said he should be more social, having a few drinks was pretty damn social and he could at least let Mel and Sal know he was alright by making an appearance. Izumi and Sig had left over a week ago, deciding to head back home because his teacher had classes and a butcher shop to run.

Olivia came and went and now and then he would catch Herth and thus catch wind of her working to settle things with Parliament once and for all. She was bound and determined to get her way. Of course Mikey always loves to tease him about the busted arm and called him a hero, which he really wasn't since the bullet was meant for him to begin with. Then the guys always loved to tease him about being crazy enough to apply for training in Drachma. Even Mikey called him crazy though the older guy had gone through that training himself.

He had to wait until he was completely healed according to the Ice Queen which sucked because that meant waiting even longer than one month. He had to wait three because the last batch of recruits left this week and the training programs lasted eight to nine weeks and they didn't like training groups at different times because they had more than enough recruits to keep up with. But that also meant he'd have to be back on duty here in Central for a while, on paperwork duty when his medical leave was up, so that he could completely heal. That woman had demanded that he have a doctor send her word that he was fully healed so there was no telling what else she'd demanded behind his back.

He walked without needing to think about where he was going; his feet would carry him to his destination. If he was lucky the rest of the guys wouldn't be there, it wasn't the weekend so there was a bit of a chance of that. He could ignore the people on the streets pretty easily, and it was hardly morning, closer to the time people would be getting off work by now so he expected somewhat of a crowd when he finally got there. He was pulled from his thoughts when the Corporal asked him, "Where are we going sir?"

"Nectar's, you two want a few drinks?"

"Yeah-" the private started only to be cut off by the Corporal, "No thank you sir, we need to stay alert."

He shrugged and put his hands in his pockets as he kept going, "Suit yourself then," at least it was only a few more blocks to his destination. He needed something to calm his nerves, that damn session had brought up way too many memories of the mistakes he'd made in his life and what it had cost not only him but those around him that he cared about. He definitely needed to calm down before he headed back to Gracia's, or maybe he could call and tell them he wasn't coming back so she wouldn't have to worry. He really needed to get a dorm or a hotel room or something, there was no need for him to stay at Gracia's, she never complained but she had a right to get back to her normal life without worrying about him all the time. Of course Winry and Al and Anna had a reason to be there, they were still looking for a place to stay in the city and somewhere Winry could set up a shop. He still didn't know how he felt about them coming to Central to stay considering that things always seemed to be happening here.

He looked up finally taking in the scenery around him and spotted a phone and headed for it. It so happened to be across the street from Nectars' and when he glanced in the direction of the bar he noticed that it already had a few customers going inside the newly repaired bar. He'd have to ask Mel who all was hurt that day and see if he could do anything for the civilians who usually hung out or lived around the bar. Maybe they needed some repairs done still; he could at least do what he could for them. He stepped into the phone booth and closed the door while his two escorts stood outside it, the Corporal even leaned back against the door like he could shield him from any danger.

He huffed and picked up the phone to hold it between his ear and shoulder while he sifted through his pocket for some change. He dialed Gracia's number and it rang three times before Winry's voice came on the line, "Hello?"

"Hey Win' it's Ed."

"What did you do now," geeze what was with that accusatory tone she had, he hadn't caused much trouble in over two years. That one incident didn't count since he never invited those assholes into Xing.

"I haven't done anything. I was just . . . I'm across the street from Nectar's and was calling to say I'm not coming back tonight."

"And just where are you going to stay then? Are you alright?"

He hated that second question, he got it all the damn time and it was rather annoying. "I'm fine, just need to calm my nerves is all. I'll get a hotel room or something-"

"Absolutely not! You should come back here or stay with someone you know."

"I'll think of something-"

"I'll call the General and ask him-"

"No way! I don't want any damn help from that bastard."

"Fine, then I'll talk to the Colonel and see if she can go by and get you to let you stay with her then."

"Fine."

"Thanks for calling this time even if I don't think you should go to a bar . . ."

"Yeah . . . Don't worry, I'll be fine. If nothing else I can just stay with Sal or something alright."

"I know all of us would feel better if you were with Miss Riza since you won't go stay with the General."

"Talk to you later Winry."

"Don't you hang up on me," she all but shouted through the phone.

"Geeze, alright. What?" For some reason the hair on the back of his neck had begun to stand on end like something dangerous was around him making him a bit distracted as she kept talking on the other end.

"Promise me that you will stay with Miss Riza or one of the other soldiers tonight since you won't come back here where you should."

"Alright I promise. Later," he replied glancing around him but seeing nothing as of yet.

"Edward, please be careful and stay out of trouble," she said to him catching his attention again because of the tone of her voice. With a smile he shrugged off his uneasiness enough to reply back; "Don't worry so much, I'll be fine."

"I mean it Ed, don't go looking for trouble."

His temper flared but he shoved it down to say in a barely controlled voice; "I don't go looking for trouble."

"Maybe not, but you're always at the center of it."

"Goodnight Winry, tell everyone I said goodnight too."

She sighed, "Goodnight Ed, call me when you make it wherever you happen to stay so I know you're alright."

"I will," he said before they both hung up. That prickling sensation ran all the way up his spine making him tense with his hand held over the reciever. Something was wrong, for some reason it was entirely too quiet and it felt like he was alone. That wasn't right, he had two escorts, however annoying it was to have them around he really wasn't that threatening without the use of both hands.

He had a sinking feeling that only further fueled his apprehension and sent up alarms through his mind as he turned to tap on the glass where the Corporal was propped against the doors of the phone booth. At first nothing appeared to have happened and then something caught his eye and he looked down. Blood, blood smeared on the door and when he pushed at the door the soldier slid down the door further blocking any way for him to get out without shoving the guy out of the way, which was going to be difficult with only one working arm. He glanced to his right to see that the private was standing rigid and just in front of him was a figure, all he could see before the private jerked hard against the glass making Ed duck down instinctively was blond hair.

Why hadn't he heard anything, like gunshots or something? Wait, wasn't a phone booth sound proof? Plus Winry had been yelling at him at one point. Damn it, he was probably utterly screwed, an injured arm that made his alchemy hard to do and his strength significantly less, plus he was still recovering so his energy was less than usual so he would tire quickly. This was the perfect time for any enemies to come after him and the sudden wave of vulnerability and weakness that washed over him made him furious.

Never again, no matter what, whoever the hell it was they were going to just have to go ahead and kill him. He was never being made a prisoner again and he sure as fuck was not going back to being someone s slave. Swallowing and glaring at the ground in his few seconds of thought he decided he was fighting whatever the consequences.

He looked up from his crouched position and saw a woman standing there, her expression impassive, her eyes a crystalline blue, pale skin, wearing the same damn outfit that that doctor he'd just seen was wearing such a short time ago. Guess he was right in his first assumption, that damn bitch was the one and the same as the woman that had attacked Mustang and Riza with power that was both stronger than alchemy and not alchemy. His blood chilled in his veins when those cold, heartless eyes locked with his own, her lips slowly curling in a predatory and triumphant smile.

_To Be Continued . . .  
_

* * *

*I know how that was really done but I decided to change things around a bit so Ed could keep his alchemy.  
*Another thing I changed because of the Greed Vs Ed in the first anime.


	11. Chapter Ten

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story was worked on in spurts, chapter 10 here, then chapter 2, then 4, then prologue, then 11, get the picture? I have other stories going on presently therefore this one may take a while between updates. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it none the less._

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed ****  
****Genre: Drama, Action Adventure **  
**Spoilers: Up until the current chapter of the manga. (Ch 99)**  
**Series: FMA ****  
****Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall) **  
**Status: Work In Progress **  
**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**

**_Can we not accept help when most of our lives have been one fight for survival after the other?_**

**Chapter 10**

"Tell Mustang to get here now! There's trouble," he shouted over the radio from where he was standing only a block away from Ed. Damn it was seriously a good thing Riza was so anal about security measures. This would have been easier on all of them if they had just ignored the orders to not expend the best soldiers on someone who could take care of themselves. Yeah, an injured right arm that disabled the boss more than any of them could fathom and the lack of his usual alchemic power, according to the chief alchemy was powered by the alchemist themselves, made him completely capable of taking care of himself. Utter bullshit in his mind, anger and a temper didn't amount to much when the one known for his temper was left with disabilitating injuries, once again the higher ups fail to use their brains instead of cutting corners for their own selfish ends.

As he rushed forward to try and get to the other blond before that strange and dangerous woman did he had to remind himself that injured or not Ed was still a fighter and he could mostly get himself out of jams. But this chick, she was deadly, Mustang had said not to underestimate her and he'd learned fighting Lust not to underestimate a woman just because she looked sexy as hell in whatever she happened to wear. He glanced at Ed who had pushed himself to his feet; probably having ducked from whatever the hell had killed the private, and was relieved to see that determination was there in his eyes.

He figured that the boss was still in the booth simply because the unfortunate Corporal was against the door blocking his way out and only one arm would make it hard to push a blocked door open. He set his sights back on the intended target standing a good twenty feet away from them looking out of the corner of his eye as Ed motioned him to move back from the booth. He stepped off to the side of it but kept his gun aimed at the woman. She had this creepy smile on her face, like she was completely confident that whatever they did would be pointless. The hell with that he thought to himself tightening his hand on his gun as he saw a bright flash of blue in the corner of his eye.

He didn't dare take his eyes off of her and he ground his teeth together angrily when she saw her gaze shift from him to Ed with a hungry expression. That wasn't happening either he fired a round at her, hitting the ground at her feet to bring her attention back to him as he snapped at her, "Don't think about it bitch."

"Such fowl language from such a charming young man, how dreadful," she said in a disappointed voice.

"Yeah, like you're one to judge anyone. Just what the fuck are you and what do you want," he was relieved to hear Ed's voice snarl at the woman which meant the kid was out of the booth. Ed came to stand beside him and he wished he would just get out of here. Everyone would kill him if the other blond ended up injured further than he already was, bad enough two other soldiers ended up killed on his watch. But he hadn't even seen her coming, one moment she was there and in the next those two were dead. Hell not even the boss had noticed until it was too late so that had to count for something right?

"Ah yes, of course you would immediately assume I'm not human, fitting considering all you've seen and done."

"Cut the shit and answer my question," he had to hand it to this woman, she was lucky the Fullmetal Alchemist was all too aware he was in no fighting condition or she would really be in for it. He'd seen the boss in action before and he had no doubts that he would give this person or whatever she was a run for her money. At least he liked to think that because it was the only reason besides protecting the boss that he wasn't high tailing it out of there to let these two have at it. If you were smart you stayed the hell out of Ed's way when he was fighting.

"That would hardly be equivalent, you never answer my questions."

"That's because I figured you were a two faced, slimy, bitch," was the growled response. Well they had that confirmed, good thing he'd left the radio dial on so that everyone could hear what was being said. Fuery was something else, inventing these headsets that were radio's and allowed them to communicate hands free with one another. It made it really easy to get confessions out of twisted officials or even psychopaths like this piece of work before them.

"Hmm, we all have our darker sides, or in your case, pathetic, helpless, and weaker sides-"

"Shut up you fucking bitch," wow, his eardrums had to be bleeding from that shout. He glanced at the kid beside him feeling completely confused by what this woman was talking about. Ed was hardly any of the things she'd just said. What was she talking about, what did she . . . wait, the boss had said it was a possibility the psychiatrist for military personal was the same woman that had attacked the General and Colonel. That meant, she knew all about Ed, nothing was classified to her because doctors' had to know everything to make their diagnosis. Damn, he fired his gun at her again, this time cutting her cheek before he snapped, "You heard him, shut that mouth of yours lady."

"Well now," her hand brushed her bleeding cheek and the cut disappeared as she pulled her hand away. Humunculi? But they'd killed all of them; he and everyone else had killed them all. But what else could she be that allowed her to heal like that?

"A humuculus, which one are you supposed to be then," Ed snapped.

She laughed, it was a cold laugh that made his blood turn to ice in his veins, really when was the Calvary going to get here? He had the feeling that the only reason the two of them weren't dead or fighting this thing, whatever she was, was because she chose so. He tightened his hands until the knuckles were white around his gun to keep his hands from shaking.

"That's a bit of an insult Edward, I am no humunculi. I wouldn't consider myself human either before you get any ideas. I merely am."

"How about changing that," came the familiar, although angry voice of the General Havoc was waiting on just before a snap conjured a wall of fire between them and the woman. Havoc relaxed his arms a bit but kept his gun aimed in the general area of where she had to be. He glanced quickly at the boss who had stepped back from the fire and was thankfully standing a bit behind him now. His gaze went back to the fire as it began to die down enough to see on the other side of it.

"Fuck," he swore under his breath, she was still there. Considering how dangerous he was told she was wouldn't Mustang have fried her, one glance at the chief told him he'd meant to. The others were coming over to him with Hawkeye, Herth, and the rest of the team Ed worked with now trailing behind them, guns in their hands.

"Nice try General Mustang," she said without any amount of fear in her voice that smile from before still present on her face.

"What the fuck are you," Ed snarled making to step towards her again only to have Mustang put himself in front of the younger man and glared darkly, almost hatefully at the woman across the way from them. He could hear people around them talking and gathering but ignored it as he continued his vigilance to keep her from the boss and now the chief. It was a bit of a relief to have Hawkeye come to stand beside him her gun aimed and her eyes narrowed with dangerous determination.

"It would seem that I am sorely outnumbered now, how dreadful."

It would be foolish of any of them to take her words as her saying she would retreat, if not even alchemic flames could harm her then what could they hope to do to stop her from claiming whatever it was she wanted? Even with that thought in his mind he would die before he would let her take whoever it was she was after. He could only stand there at the moment with his gun aimed pointlessly at her and wait for what she did next.

"What are you after," Mustang demanded in a voice all of his subordinates recognized as the tone he used when he would not be denied an answer. She smirked and her gaze settled on Ed who tensed even more than he already was and actually took a half step back. That was not in the least bit encouraging; too many times he'd seen the younger alchemist stand toe to toe with danger with unwavering strength. That he was even that much intimidated to back down that small amount filled him with dread and unease. It seemed as though the feeling was mutual around him because now the air was tainted with masked trepidation.

But there was an entirely different effect coming from the General, his shoulders squared and his eyes narrowed to what reminded him of a panther or some other deadly predator, a familiar fire radiating from the other man. It reminded him of why he stood by the General through all the hell they had all seen, his strength was at least equal to the prodigy of a boy that had grown into a troubled young man who stood behind them. His finger itched to pull the trigger on his gun just to see if a bullet in this woman's' head would make any difference in removing the threat before them. In that short amount of time he flinched at the deadly tone of voice his superior officer spoke with after the answer to his demand was given silently.

"You will burn before you touch him," and again he snapped this time engulfing only her figure in flames. What truly set him and everyone else on edge was the lack of screams, the lack of flailing or absence of the stench of burning flesh. Then her figure was gone and before any of them had time to react guns went off aimed at the sky as they were all thrown to their feet. His back being slammed into something solid and then the painful roll of a harsh landing on just as solid material knocked all of his senses into chaos for a moment. All he heard as stars danced across his vision from the air being knocked from his lungs were screams from bystanders, an angry yell, a crash, and the rustling of those around him getting their bearings back.

He drew in a deep breath greedily before forcing himself to his feet, gun in hand, instinct made him aim his gun at the enemy before him before the sight before him could be fully analyzed. How in the world had she struck all of them without warning, without detection? And now there was little that could be done as she held someone who should by all rights be far too heavy for even a grown woman to lift let alone by the neck against the ruins of the blood stained phone booth.

He gritted his teeth as he watched Ed being held by the throat, his feet dangling above the ground, his left hand gripping the arm holding him tightly enough for his knuckles to be white while his still injured arm dangled uselessly at his side. He couldn't help but to remember another gory scene with a phone booth and the anger he felt because of the helplessness only made him long to shoot this bitch in the head and watch her die. A soldier to the core, but after losing Hues he knew revenge was something each and every one of Mustang's command was capable of. No matter the cost this would not be a repeat of that, no one able to stop a life from being taken even while they stood right there watching the scene unfold.

He glanced briefly to his left at seeing the General pushing himself to his feet, blood dripping down the side of his face from who knew what kind of injury fury in his expression as the sight before him began to make sense to his no doubt dazed condition. There was a shout from across the street, Mel and Sal were shouting for this woman to let Ed go but their words sounded muffled to him because of the tension making his heart pound in his ears. Noticing everyone around him brought forth the reality of how many people would rather have a way to get Ed away from this woman or whatever she was.

"Bitch," was snarled breathlessly from Ed as he tried to kick at her, she took the blow without flinching and her lips curled into that creepy smile again. His finger twitched on the trigger of the gun in his hand when she leaned close and whispered something in his ear and he wanted nothing more than to fire when the boss paled and his left hand went slack at his side. She slowly loosened her grip and lowered her hostage to the ground before she turned towards them all grabbing hold of the braid along Ed's back to hold him at her side. He offered no resistance and his expression was blank, despondent. What the hell did she say or do to him? If it wasn't for the slight twitch of a left hand he would have worried that she'd put him under a trance or something. Instead he just watched feeling as though a storm was slowly brewing close by.

"Let him go," Mustang snarled.

Her laughter silenced even the crowd that was gathering before she said, "But of course, it's hardly the time yet." But instead of releasing the hair in her hand she brought up her other hand and made to touch Ed's shoulder. He could literally see the events unfold seconds before they happened. The tense set of the boss's shoulders and how his hand had curled into a white knuckled fist before he moved with lightning speed.

The flash of movement, alchemic electricity licking at the air and cackling with strength that seemed endless when ignited before then Ed had reversed their positions and stood holding a spear to her throat with a deadly glint in his narrowed eyes. Damn the kid had gotten damn fast over the years. She tilted her head to her side and said loud enough for all of them to hear but with her gaze locked on her intended prey, "Until next time." If he hadn't of already seen more than enough strange things over the last five to six years he would have probably been unable to believe that she evaporated into thin air without a trace other than the violent testimony of death and destruction. Regardless, it was still really hard to believe anyway.

The spear clanged to the ground and the boss stood stiff with his left hand fisted at his side before he turned and put that hand through what was left of the glass of the phone booth. His hand came away bloodied but no one questioned him about it or thought anything of it. At least he wasn't swinging at them or destroying buildings like he was prone to do in his more temperamental days. It was an echo as everyone put the safety back on and put their guns away. He was ordered by Hawkeye to help clear up the mess and get the civilians under control. They still had work to do even if he wished he could ask the kid if he was alright. As though his thought was relayed to the chief the older man approached the younger blond alchemist with genuine concern on his face.

"Think that's proof enough that I'm not paranoid about doctors?"

He felt a bit vindicated by the slight flinch from the older man from his tone of voice as he glanced at the two soldiers that had lost their lives to this new threat. He didn't know what was worse, these two guys dying and leaving their friends and families behind or having been unable to stop the bitch that had killed them. Why did he have to end up with an enemy that knew far too much about him, happened to know how to play with words and toy with peoples' emotions, and seemed damn near unstoppable. She hadn't even flinched when he had that spear at her throat, hell he didn't even see her move until he was up against the metal posts of the phone booth with her hand around his throat.

He was probably going to have bruises; his neck was still hurting a bit. But his shoulder and collar bone were killing him, it was one jagged stab of pain after another which meant he'd probably ended up back at square one as far as healing went. Mustang still hadn't said a word, the guy was probably feeling pretty pissed off and embarrassed that not even his alchemy had worked against her. The witnesses to this incident as it was going to be called were going to cause a lot of hell for everyone. He didn't doubt that Mustang's abilities would be brought to question as well as whether he was deserving of the rank of Brigadier General at such a young age when he couldn't stop a threat like one simple woman.

"Edward, you should have that hand looked at."

"No," he could ignore bruises, and the other two things bothering him he was more than used to. He turned his gaze away and moved away from the phone booth to sit on the curb a few feet away. The others were trying to keep the civilians back even as more soldiers arrived with barricades and a few investigators showed up. He didn't bother hiding his distaste as one of them came over to him and said, "Lieutenant Colonel, could I have your account on the events?"

He glanced at Mustang who was being questioned just out of earshot and sighed before turning back to the Sergeant that reminded him a bit of Fuery in his timidness. It was grating at times when he'd seen people who stuttered and were shy but he had too much on his mind right now for it to be more than an slight irritation. After answering all of the standard questions he felt more exhausted and agitated than he had when this day had started. He hated this helplessness bullshit, too weak to use his alchemy much, injured to the point of almost disability, and the stress was making him pay less attention to his instincts than he should. He should know better than to ignore his sixth sense, it had saved him more than enough times and right now, with a known enemy after him he shouldn't be allowing himself to let his guard down in the slightest.

It was dark outside by the time everything was wrapped up, the two dead soldiers were carried off, and the civilians began to return to their homes, businesses, and whatever else they were doing. Snapping himself out of his thoughts and the fact that he was useless today and made himself practically a sitting duck he looked around. Carnage, like a small tornado tore through the area was what was around him. Blood, a broken phone booth, cracked and burned sidewalk, unsettled citizens, and soldiers he didn't know blocking citizens from getting near the scene. He felt responsible for the deaths of the two soldiers who were his escorts even though he shouldn't have and was brought out of those thoughts by the sound of approaching footsteps.

Looking up in time to see Hawkeye standing before him at a respectful distance he immediately noticed the calculated look in her eyes as she looked around the scene. He had no doubt that she was beating herself up about this, he'd known her long enough to know that breaches in security measures was something she considered a fault of her own. When she looked back at him her gaze softened a bit and she offered a ghost of a smile before saying, "I assured Melanie and Sal that you were unhurt."

That would be a welcome change but it would be stupid too. He wasn't risking their lives when he was more than positive he was a target of a psychopath. He stood up stiffly, injuries and sore from the adrenaline rush he offered a brief smile of gratitude, "Thanks." There was no way he could go with his original plans to have a few drinks and cool off now. The chances were too high that the whatever she was would return and he'd rather not endanger Sal and Mel for selfish reasons. He couldn't return to Gracia's either after what had just happened so that left him with staying with Riza or Mustang. Not that it made much difference who he stayed with since this woman after him seemed unstoppable.

He had a strong urge to put his hand through something again and that reminded him of his stinging hand from doing that very thing and looked at his bloodied knuckles. He let out another sigh as he turned his gaze back to the Colonel, "Guess it's probably safest to stay with one of you guys huh?" She nodded but her mouth was set in a grim line, considering her personality it was more like how Mustang had looked earlier, angry at themselves for their inability to do much of anything against a threat.

"I would recommend that yes, but I am certain you can make the decision for yourself who would be best for you to stay with."

'Not that it will make much difference,' he thought to himself and could see in her expression. Instead he replied, "Yeah, and you'd recommend Mustang wouldn't you?"

"I would yes, he does seem the safest bet. We have already seen that this woman is targeting both of you so it would be easier on us to guard you if you are in the same place."

"Great, figured as much," he muttered, "I can live with that but I won't guarantee his safety."

There was a small smile he received for that which he was grateful to see even if it was very brief. She motioned for them to make their way away from the scene around them and the two of them started walking towards what he could tell was head quarters. A few moments of thoughtful silence fell over them before she suddenly said, "I haven't had the chance to say how grateful I am that you are back even if circumstances are not the best right now."

He ducked his head for a moment, "Thanks, I appreciate it."

Her shoes clicked and he noticed that both of them had fallen into step even though he was pretty sure he had his own walk that was hardly military. Since when had he marched or started to have this habit of doing it, must have been recent. His step faltered when the memory of where he'd developed the habit had come from came crashing into his thoughts and his mouth set into a grim line as he fought to shove the memory back down. Since he'd returned and no longer had Ling to distract him the nightmares were coming more often as were the memories that engraved them in his mind. He tried not to let it show but of course he knew he could hardly hide anything from the very observant woman he happened to be walking with.

"What's wrong Edward?"

"Just bad memories," he replied not bothering to lie to her. She never lied to him, that was Mustangs' job not hers so he would offer her the same courtesy. He owed a lot to her just like he didn't often remember was the same for the rest of Mustangs' command and the man himself. They had done so very much for him, helped him out at every turn and were always there ready to defend him or risk their lives for him like they did their General. He'd already figured out he was considered a part of the family unit they all had but he was surprised at times by how much they were willing to do for him and each other.

"That seems to be something much of us have in common," she replied without any accusation in her voice, only a bit of understanding.

"Yeah, sucks, but at least we're still here despite all that shit."

"Yes, though it could have been more eloquently put," she said with that small smile of hers. It was comfortable, being around her and seeing this softer, more relaxed side of her was something he thought he could get used to. She was like a big sister in his mind, strong and trustworthy and able to strike fear in you if you messed up while still being someone you could turn to if you needed to. Now that he thought about it Winry and Riza were a lot more alike than he would have been able to figure out if he hadn't of started paying attention to their mannerisms. Sure Hawkeye was much more guarded and kept herself under iron clad control but like this, with her talking to him as a person, as Riza, he could see it.

"I'm not into the fancy words, better to get to the point."

"Then perhaps that is how I should address what is on my mind," the more serious tone of her voice made him glance her way as they kept walking. He noticed her hand was resting over the butt of her gun and while they were talking she was still alert and watching for threats. He didn't like the sound of what she might be approaching but at the same time he wasn't going to deny answering her if she asked him something. He never did pay her back for her telling him the truth of Ishval and if she wanted answers from him about something he owed that to her.

"Go ahead, I owe you that much."

She looked surprised by his reply but then understanding lit her eyes and a bit of something more tender before she nodded; "What was it that woman said to you to cause you to react the way you did?"

That wasn't that horrible of a question, still not an easy one to explain or answer, but better than the one he thought she might have asked. He shrugged his left shoulder and clenched and unclenched his left hand a few times while he thought of how to word it. He could still hear her words echoing in his head in that damn whisper she had, still remember that disgusting familiar feeling of helplessness as her nails dug into his neck. His hand went to his neck to rub the back of it and he wasn't surprised to see a few flecks of dried blood on his hand when he brought it back to look at it.

"She was talking about Rousia," that was putting it very mildly but it wasn't a lie at least. 'Look at how utterly weak and pathetic you are right now, everyone hesitates because they see it right now. You're nothing but a worthless slave to your past and you always will be. But soon you'll be my slave,' it was those last whispered words that brought his rage forth and made him lash out at her. He was never becoming a slave again; never again, he would die first. He hated that bitch, he had since the first day he was made to go to those sessions with her, she knew how to play on his emotions, on his fears and worries and use them against him. She'd shown him that today and he wasn't likely to forget it because it was true and he could feel that and it made him angry that what she'd said was true.

"You're not weak because of today Edward," he looked up sharply wondering how Hawkeye could have possibly, but wait, she had to be feeling that way too.

"Right, injured and even that display of childishness didn't faze that psychopath."

"A bullet in her head or being engulfed in flames didn't seem to affect her either," was the calm reply. How could she say something like that so calmly? But then again she'd fought the humunculi as well so maybe this was just like that only nothing seemed to work. None of them could even kill her once to try and weaken her because nothing effected her.

"None of us did any good so I hardly think you should be thinking yourself weak," she continued breaking into his thoughts before continuing once again; "What you went through in Rousia holds no sway here because you have already proven that you are still capable of living your life."

Now he was startled and caught off guard, she was only the second person that wasn't asking him about that time only making an observation. He could see H.Q. coming into view as they continued on and he ducked his head and muttered, "Thanks Riza."

It was subtle the brush of her hand on his shoulder but he felt it all the same and was grateful for it. At least he was starting to remember that he could rely on her, turn to her if he needed to and not have to worry about her casting judgment. Now if only he could get it through his own head that the other people he cared about wouldn't pass judgment or see him as nothing but a worthless, cowardly, child when he could get up the courage to come clean about what had happened to him in Rousia. He was still determined to keep that to himself for now, but he already knew how much things like that could eat you up alive and tear you apart.

He wasn't going to confide in Riza no matter how much he trusted her because she had more than enough to handle, but hell he would figure it out. Now would be a good time to be back in Xing with Ling to distract him from the chaos going on around him. That immortal asshole was the only person he knew that wasn't a humuculus and remained immortal. He didn't see the guy as a threat like he did this woman, especially after everything they'd gone through and done together. He felt his ears burn at some of the things they had engaged in together and . . . wait a moment, Ling is immortal but not a humuculus, this woman is immortal but not a humuculus. Did she have a stone or something? He could picture her being twisted enough to overpower the souls with a stone, hell Father had done it for over a hundred years so why couldn't she have done the same? Only, he hadn't felt that kind of energy from her, sinister and dark yes, but not in the same way the power of the stone was within the humunculi and Father.

Damn it, he had to figure out where she got her power from or he'd never be able to diffuse it. Following Hawkeye into Mustang's office with his mind racing on what it could possibly be he knew he needed time to actually sort out his thoughts and do some research on probabilities. Immortality was something discussed as an effect of the stone but he hadn't paid much attention to all of that. The approach he needed to take now was researching immortality in general. Plenty of cultures had their own means of how to obtain the gift or curse of eternal life.

Rousia, Aerugo, Drachma, Xing, every country had their own traditions and means of power. Maybe he should call that leech in Xing using Mustangs' phone since he was stuck with the prick for a while now, would serve the bastard right for being a bastard to make a long distance call like that. He smirked and looked up when his name was called to see Hawkeye looking back at him, her professional mask back in place as she said, "You have a phone call Edward."

He raised his eyebrow, "A phone call, from who?"

"Apparently it isn't Al as I just spoke with him and assured him you would be staying with me until further notice," came the familiar smug voice of Mustang himself who was in his office at his desk as he stepped into the inner office to take the phone call. Riza was the one holding the phone out to him and he saw the look she gave the General which made the older man sigh and get to his feet.

"Don't take too long, its' late and I'd much rather be at home at this hour Fullmetal."

"Yeah whatever bastard," Ed replied automatically before reaching for the phone and saying apprehensively, "Hello?"

"Edo, isn't it wonderful to be able to speak with a prince once again?"

He groaned, what was this guy psychic or something? "What the hell do you want," he snarled as he heard the door close behind him and noticed he was left in the inner office alone. Damn them, he was going to hear about this forever. There would be no end to the teasing about someone calling to speak to him through Mustangs' office number and then actually being left alone to have the conversation.

"It seems there's a bit of trouble brewing in your home country and I thought since I'm a rather nice guy I would check up on my favorite blond."

"Go to hell Ling. How do you know that?"

"Ah ha, there is something going on. You're in the middle of it aren't you Edo?"

"Stop calling me that asshole and who told you that?"

"You did, just now. How has it been, returning home?"

Now there was a bit of sadness to the guys voice that he just caught because of the prolonged exposure to the guy. Sure, to everyone else his voice was either serious or cheerful most of the time but he knew what to listen for to tell the difference. "It could be worse or better," he replied easily enough.

"I take it everyone was very curious. Have you been telling them about your private life?"

There was that joking serious tone which annoyed the hell out of him, "Yes and hell no!"

"No need to shout now. I do miss those tantrums of yours."

"I don't have tantrums," he shouted through the phone.

"Hmm, yes you do," now there was a teasing lilt to the Princes' voice that made him want to be there with him right now so he could strangle him.

"I think Xing could live without one less Prince," he growled into the phone.

There was laughter and then, "I highly doubt you would stand a chance at the attempt. Maybe you ought to come back and try."

Like that any anger he felt left him and he sighed heavily as he leaned his hip against the desk, "Ling-"

"Yes, yes I know. That does not stop me missing your company Ed."

"Sorry about that, I shouldn't have left it like that after everything we-"

"Don't get sentimental on me now, I understand. This of course brings about a thought that has been plaguing me. Have you told that infuriating man how you feel yet?"

"Well . . . no, not yet. It's been kinda of crazy-"

"That is hardly reason enough, when your life is at risk then it is best to take risks in case you very well lose your life."

"Yeah, alright, easy for you to say when you're off in your country-"

"Did you think it was easy on me to watch you walk away from me when I knew I could have made you stay?"

He paused at that and knew that Ling was speaking the truth; he could have made him stay just by seeing him off. And he would have had to do despite the fact that he knew he couldn't be what the Prince wanted him to be was ask him to stay. He was comfortable around the other which was something he couldn't exactly say about any of those he was around now. They'd already gone through the hurdles, knew each in every way they could and it was safe. But he'd chosen Mustang and now he was acting like a coward and backing down. Starting a square one, laying all his sins bare and making himself vulnerable was the hardest part. The attraction and the lust, that was all easy but he wasn't going to have a fling with the other man, he couldn't, couldn't handle that after everything else he'd been put through already. He would fall completely apart so it was all or nothing and he wasn't completely sure he was ready to make that leap yet.

"I know," he finally muttered.

"You can't hide forever, you have to take the risk, if he shoots you down which I highly doubt considering what a catch you are then you can come back to me. I'll take you back however I can get you back."

That sounded flattering at the least but he wasn't going to do that to Ling, he was a friend and he deserved more than that even if he was a lecherous, conniving, arrogant prick. With a short laughed he replied, "Yeah I get what you're saying alright. And you keep thinking that your greediness."

"Ah, but we had such fun with greed coming into play."

The hell they did, more like bruises, scrapes, and more than enough bite marks to make them look like they were both attacked by rapid dogs or something.

He just laughed shortly again and was about to end the phone call when his thoughts from before struck him. "Ling, you came to Amestrius looking for the secrets of immortality right?" It wasn't really a question but he felt the shift in the conversation change dramatically at his words.

There was a moment of silence before the prince replied, "Yes, of course. Why are you asking questions to which you already know the answer?"

"Yeah, yeah. Look, was Amestrius the only place you looked or did you try other countries as well?"

"Considering the animosity of the other countries at the time I only managed to research your country personally. Why the sudden interest in immortality, do you plan to rejoin me in the future once your General has passed," there was a teasing yet mildly hopeful tone to the others voice at those words.

"Hell no, I am not taking my chances with the gate over something like that! Did you find anything substantial at all that reached outside of my country?"

"Just what is going on Edward that would cause you to interrogate me so?"

"Just answer the question!"

Ling cleared his throat before he replied in a somber tone, "I have heard of some very dark secrets kept heavily guarded that reside from Rousia regarding eternal life. I was unable to confirm whether the rumors are true or false due to the animosity between that country and my own. Now that I have answered your inquiry do me the favor of answering mine. What is going on that would cause you to delve into something you have no interest in obtaining for yourself?"

"I have a bit of an enemy that isn't a humuculus but appears immortal."

"Appears immortal?"

"You better be grateful this is a secure line, yes immortal. Shooting her, catching her on fire, everything short of decapitation isn't working and she's not using alchemy but she's deadly strong and quick."

"Does this vixen have a name?"

"Yeah, Quendalyn or some shit-"

He heard the shuffle of hurried movement and the hard tone of voice even though the volume was less than it should be probably because the other had pulled the phone away from his ear; 'Lan Fan grab the old scrolls from seven years ago on Rousia. The one with the purple seal if you would."

More rustling, paper being smoothed out and then, "Quendalyn, lady of eternal youth. An enchantress, elegant, lady of power that is the queen of a royal family long since past. A family infected with greed that was driven into isolation and cursed with the loss of their hearts by the god in which they served history goes on to say that she supposedly died. She is often considered a goddess though whether her intentions are positive or negative it does not say."

"Okay then, so this psychopath is some god or whatever?"

"That is what I was led to believe however it is never recommended to make assumptions about anything. Facts are what is needed in this case and the unfortunate state of events prevents your or I from gathering such facts."

"Sorry-"

"Do not apologize for something that was not within your control or your wish upon my country. I am sorry that I am unable to gain a means in which to assist you further."

"I appreciate what you did give me so thanks."

"It is shameful that a prince is unable to help one in which he cares so very much about. In payment I request that you provide me with details on what kind of lover your general will turn you into."

He growled, blushed, and snarled into the phone loud enough to cut off the low chuckle, "Hell fucking no, that's none of your damn business if it even happens at all you jackass!"

There was laughter on the other end then in a more serious and sincere tone Ling said, "Take care of yourself my jewel, it would be very misfortunate for a rare gem such as yourself to be lost to this world." then the line went dead before he could reply. That guy seriously had too much fun throwing him for a loop all the time. One minute he was being an arrogant prick, then he was joking and poking fun at him and then he went and said something sincere and sappy. He growled in frustration and slammed the receiver back on its' cradle just before the door opened and the topic of the last part of the conversation came into the room. Turning away to hide the blush that Lings' words still hanging in his head invoked he caught sight of a smirk on the others' face making him want to punch the man.

The silence was broken as the man came closer to the desk and said, "Now that you're done with your phone call I believe we should get going."

With a scoff and a strong urge to cross his arms over his chest which he didn't do because of his injuries he glared at the other and said, "What if I had still been on the phone you nosey prick?"

An eyebrow was raised at his question and then that smirk was on the guys' face, "Then you would have simply had to walk. Your brother wants you to call him once we reach my home, he was adamant that I pass along the information."

"Yeah, whatever," he said as he headed for the door not waiting for the older man to follow behind him but hearing him do so anyway. The door to the inner office closed silently before the sound of the door being locked caught his ear. Apparently Hawkeye, Havoc, and Herth were escorting them back since it was those three that were waiting in the outer office for them. Ed didn't wait for any of them to say anything as he headed out of the office and into the hallway. He heard all of them following after him and tensed when he felt his elbow grabbed, "Slow down a bit we are taking the car."

He pulled his arm away trying to ignore the way that small patch of skin felt hotter than the rest of him from the touch of the older man as he slowed his pace to the same pace as that same man. While he should be thinking about what he'd found out about this Quendalyn chick he couldn't help his wandering mind. He was around the man that he'd left Ling and the peace of Xing for and that made it damn near impossible to not go over the things that prick had said over the phone in regards to the raven haired general.

He refused to turn his gaze towards him while his mind went through not only the events since his return but also what Ling had told him. He knew the guy was right but how could he get involved in something like that with so much going on? Maybe he should tell the guy what was going on the next time he spoke to him, only that would require him calling that guy back which he really didn't want to do considering the innuendos and hinting at them getting back together like they were ever actually anything like a normal couple to begin with.

He was completely distracted when they made it to the military car and Hawkeye was the one to discretely get his attention so he could climb into the car. He couldn't help but wonder just how far Mustang lived from H.Q. as he got into the backseat of the car. Havoc and Herth were apparently going to follow in another car because only the General and Colonel were in the same car with him as the doors were closed. The smug git had taken a seat in the back while the Colonel took the drivers' spot, a look telling them to put on their seatbelts as she did the same and then they were getting ready to leave.

As they made their way off the base he felt his mind drifting off to everything that was going on, all those old wounds having been reopened seemed small in comparison to having his time spent away from everyone and everything he knew. That point in time was like an entire lifetime, he must have lived several of those already. The time before their mom died, then after, then when they tried to bring her back and after that, his time searching to correct the wrongs, then when he nearly died because of Kimblee, and after that when he reunited with everyone. The battle against Father, then the aftermath of that, then Rousia, then after that when he made it the North H.Q. Then returning to Central and having to face everyone when he sure as hell didn't feel like he could, then his time in Xing, his time with that aggravating prince, and now here he was back in Central feeling torn apart because of all the things that were resurfacing in his mind. Not to mention Al had to feel the same way when he finally had his body back, he wasn't a fool as to believe his younger brother didn't live several lives as well. The waking world and the world in which Al continued to stay awake had to be something else entirely.

Now he had practically volunteered to stay in the same house as the bastard that had kept him from staying in Xing where he felt more comfortable and like he wasn't being interrogated. Sure, he had to come back for his brother but that incessant need to see the smug asshole again was really what made it impossible to stay away. That day when the two of them had actually gone out for coffee or whatever was nice but he'd felt too damn exposed and vulnerable then and it had pissed him off feeling that way so he'd all but shoved the bastard away again. It was too damn complicated in his head to try and figure out why he was playing this game. Maybe he was just scared of either scenario that could play out, he hadn't missed the way he was watched or the flirting that night but the next day before they were attacked he'd felt like he needed to put some distance between them.

He couldn't wrap his head around this, years of feeling some strange pull towards the man and then when he figured out what it was he wanted thanks to Ling's persistence and how that had inadvertently pushed the two of them together. But figuring out what it was he wanted only made it that much harder to pull away and put that distance between them. Now he had to stay in the same house as the one he couldn't forget about. He would have stayed in Xinghan with the prince if he could have forgotten about the bastard here in Central. It was more than a crush; he knew that because it hadn't faded with the time and distance it was like it only got stronger.

"We're here Edward," Hawkeye stated from the front seat when they pulled to a stop. He really must have been lost in his thoughts to have completely missed them arriving. He took a deep breath before following the two out of the car and glanced at the car behind them where Havoc and Herth were looking back to Mustang when the older man said; "Those two are going to keep watch for now."

"We will work in shifts sir," Hawkeye said as they came up to Mustangs' front door. He stood there a few feet away from the door next to the General as the older man handed over the keys to the Colonel. He thought it was pointless to check the house before they went in, he already knew it was pointless to go through this extra trouble when the enemy they were facing seemed imperious to any of their abilities, including but not withstanding bullets and of course alchemy. That thought sent his mind reeling in a completely different way. How was he supposed to wrap his head around this new threat when not even alchemic flames and bullets deterred that psychotic woman? He knew for a fact that she was far from human but even a humuculus couldn't walk away from a direct hit by bullets or alchemy unscathed. They had bled and burned and then regenerated, the alchemy was useless against her but Havoc had drawn blood when he grazed her with a bullet. But it was effortless for her to heal and it surely didn't break her stride. Now he had Ling telling him she was revered as some sort of goddess in Rousia.

"Clear sir," Hawkeye's crisp voice came to them pulling him out of his thoughts long enough to follow the older man into what was going to his temporary living quarters for who knew how long. He couldn't bring himself to even think of the other title that could be applied to that. So lost is his own circling thoughts he didn't notice the silent, worried glances exchanged between the other two officers as he made his way unceremoniously to the couch without even looking around the place. He might have noticed that it was really quite a simple house, far too large for one man alone to live in and designed for comfort and the idea of 'home' if he'd paid half a mind to it.

"Edward?"

A direct question addressed to him that he hardly caught made him slowly blink and see a bit of his surroundings as he blinked up at the man. Hawkeye must have left already he wagered. He noticed that there was a fireplace to his left, would have snorted with derision at the predictability of that if he'd been able, and the coffee table in front of the couch he'd somehow missed bumping into. But right then, when his eyes met openly concerned dark ones his thoughts came to a screeching halt and he had to look away from the inquiring gaze.

He recovered with a scoff and feigned disinterest as he looked around the house, "You'd think someone like you would have wanted to give an appearance of superiority even in his own house."

"Hardly, I have enough of that at work," there was a smirk there, familiar ground to grasp at but he was too exhausted in every fathomable way to care for the bicker and banter they usually carried on within one anothers' presence. Not to mention he needed to go through what he did know so he could figure out how to fill in the blanks in his knowledge. He would rather be at a library getting books to research through than sit here doing nothing. Ignoring his physical exhaustion was something he was well versed to do, but now his mind was starting to wind down as well in this bastards' presence. Getting to his feet he looked around quickly to avoid looking directly at the man and asked, "So where do I sleep then?"

He barely caught a glint of something in the others' man's eye before it was gone and would have said something but a sigh and a hand through already disheveled hair kept him from doing so. It was like the man was willing to be patient with him or something. Well hell, after the way his day had gone he thought he deserved a bit of leeway for his attitude or whatever it was that made the man sigh like he was exasperated or something.

"I have a guest room, I'm sure a good nights' rest is more than earned on your part after today."

Hell that almost sounded considerate, with a nod the other turned heading to a staircase he'd just noticed as he followed up the stairs to the rest of the house. He would explore and learn his surroundings tomorrow. Right now he wanted to get some time to sort through his thoughts and after that whole thing earlier with the scorching touch from a simple gesture he knew he wanted some space from the general. The guest bedroom was on the direct left at the top of the stairs and he barely caught that the bathroom was right across the hall. That left the door next to it, also across the hall as what he assumed to be the man's' bedroom.

He stalked into the guest bedroom to try and stop those thoughts in their tracks and waved over his shoulder, "Thanks and all, night," he said distractingly over his shoulder as he toed his boots off and heard the soft click of the door close just before he heard a soft, "You're welcome, goodnight Edward." Once his head hit the pillow he was being pulled down into his thoughts and drifting into a restless slumber before he even bothered to actually get comfortable.

_To Be Continued . . ._


	12. Chapter Eleven

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story is something different from my usual stories. And it has a real plot go figure. I will try to give better notice before each change of view but I am certain the majority of this story will be seen through Roy's and Ed's point of views. Now then, this story is definitely slowly unfolding and while working on other stories I will try not to drag my feet too much. Hope this proves enjoyable, happy reading._

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**

**Pairing: Roy/Ed**

**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure**

**Spoilers: Up until the current chapter of the manga. (Ch 99)**

**Series: FMA**

**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**

**Status: Work In Progress**

**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**

_-Sometimes answers to some questions lead to even more questions that need answering._

**Chapter 11**

He had a routine and a certain blond, brilliant, thought laden alchemist who always ended up caught in the middle of a mess that only grew worse was loath to break it. After Ed had retried to get some much deserved rest he had gone back downstairs to light a fire and go over the reports and paperwork Hawkeye had of course been so kind as to deliver to him only an hour after her departure. He knew she really made the appearance for two reasons, to make sure he didn't fall back on his work and because she was as concerned as he. She'd asked how the troubled younger alchemist was doing and seemed a bit relieved to hear he'd already gone to bed.

This morning he'd brewed some coffee after he'd taken a shower and dressed for work and was then abruptly interrupted before he could even bother to open his paper, delivered every morning without fail to his doorstep at precisely six a.m. with a message from Havoc that came from Hawkeye. He was not to come into work today since he was assigned '_watch_' over Edward. It was an all around concern for everyone concerned that they see to Ed's well being. It must have become a habit none of them could break to look out for their youngest comrade. He did have the tendency to snarl, growl, cuss so much the paint and even the polish off his desk threatened to peel away when questioned on his own well being. So of course, he was to be the martyr because he was expendable when it came to dealing with Edward.

So instead of his work routine he automatically switched to his weekend routine for the rare times when he managed to get a day off and swiftly changed from his uniform, careful to hang it up so as not to be wrinkled and grabbed a comfortable gray t-shirt and a pair of comfortable black jeans he hardly wore anymore and was a bit surprised to find out still fit and just as comfortably as they always had. Now he sat at his table contemplating how to approach the subject of just how Edward was handling yet another catastrophe while trying to figure out how he was going to handle it and drinking what was now luke warm coffee. He was always rather talented with multi-tasking after all. It was closer to late morning by the time a tired, yet showered blond came striding into the kitchen with that same brash confidence he'd missed seeing more than he cared to admit.

It should feel awkward to have his current '_charge_' walking into his kitchen grabbing a mug and fixing himself some coffee, black with more sugar than actual coffee, and then sitting across from him at the small table placed just outside the kitchen with a rough, growled, "Morning." However, he found that it really felt more natural than anything and that should have bothered him even more but he had yet to feel as though anything was out of place. Once Edward was more awake it would be time to question the blond about what he knew. There was no doubt in his mind that the younger had found out something from the young prince in Xing. The air about him had changed when he'd left the office and he knew the look that resided in those golden eyes, it was the same look he got when he was wrapped up in old books researching forbidden alchemy back when he and Al were searching for the stone.

Since he wanted to give his new house guest the time to awaken fully he could easily sit and take in the sight of the young man before him. The usual braid was gone giving way to the high ponytail that Edward had begun to wear when he was seventeen during the chaos of the 'Promised Day'. Without a change of clothes which he was assured Al and Winry and Anna would be bringing by later today by Breda who had taken watch for Havoc something very early this morning Ed wore the same outfit as yesterday. He had seen Ed in a military uniform before, a state of dress that becoming regular but would forever be flattering, and what he had on now. A pair of brown slacks with a white, collared, button down shirt and a brown vest was a big difference from his earlier ensemble. Currently the young man had the top two buttons undone and the vest unbuttoned as well.

"What are you staring at; shouldn't you be at work anyway?"

The older man snapped out of his admiration of the other at the irritated tone of voice from his guest, "My, aren't you flattering in the morning," he managed to say smoothly without relaying that he was distracted. Setting his newspaper down and pushing his chair away from the table he stood up grabbing his cup and taking it to the kitchen to rinse out for a fresh cup of coffee. He could feel those intense golden eyes watching him and turned around a bit startled to see that same young man following him into the kitchen. With a smirk at the far off look on the others' face he said to call Edward back to reality, "What, pray tell, are you so fixated on?"

"Nothing you smug git," was the sharp reply, but the raven haired man was not so blind as to not see a slight blush dusting those tan cheeks. Edward brushed past him nearly making him step back into the counter and spill his coffee as he reached for the pot of fresh caffeine. After pouring a generous amount of sugar into his cup and stirring the contents another handful of words left the others' mouth, "Why aren't you at work?"

Mustang shrugged and took a drink of his own coffee while he discreetly watched the others' expression and simply said, "The Colonel decided it was better that I remain here."

"Great, so now we're both stuck here all day together, that's brilliant," the sarcasm in his words could be seen as well as heard. He frowned at the poor attitude and with a sigh made his way to the living room without a word. He knew Ed was a brat, always was and always would be. He would have hoped that perhaps given time that the blond would have learned some amount of tact. Surely he couldn't still hold a grudge against him for being agitated about receiving hot and cold messages and wanting to figure out the reason why that was.

Minutes ticked by before the uneven sound of footsteps alerted him to Edwards' presence in the living room. As for Mustang he was lounging in his favorite chair next to the fireplace where a small fire burned. The sound of the fire crackling in the hearth soothing as he continued reading through the newspaper. Today would not be a very good day for either of them to be seen in public after the phone booth incident, of course the people were all talking about the fact that Fullmetal was injured further after having been shot only two weeks prior. It was causing unrest that an enemy with a viable personal vendetta was after Edward given his reputation as deadly, explosive, and the 'People's Alchemist'. What was worse was what had transpired yesterday, even citizens had seen the seemingly useless efforts of the military against that woman. That had those who did not fully trust nor like the military making claims that this fiasco was nothing but a hoax to raise publicity.

Politics happened to be a topic he was exceptionally good at working his way through. However, in this instance the only way to turn this around happened to be something none of them could figure out how to accomplish. They had to make a public display of arrest or injury against this woman to change the public's views. Mel and Sal were mentioned as supporting the military and saying that from what they saw the soldiers did everything in their power to contain the situation and keep Edward safe. As for their neighbors the views were diverse and there was a mention of the shooting from two weeks ago and the military's failure to protect citizens and their homes.

"What are they saying," Ed asked him suddenly. He was surprised by the inquiry, usually Fullmetal never bothered to give a damn what the papers' had to say about him. The only time he'd shown any interest in the media was during that incident of imposters, those Tringham brothers that had posed as Ed and Al years ago. He was sure that during the time preparing for the day they all decided to take a stand against Bradley and 'Father' that Ed had to keep up with the 'word on the street' as it were because he was listed M.I.A. and wanted by the military.

"It says the same as usual; all the problems are the fault of the military. We should keep our heads down for a while until we can resolve our current dilemma."

"_Our dilemma_, how is this your problem other than because you're a nosey git?"

"Perhaps it's because until further notice I am your acting commanding officer until Holigan decides to take you back. There is also the fact that Hawkeye believes I am also a target and have been targeted twice since this began. Perhaps it also has to do with my caring about your well being."

"Ha, bullshit Mustang, I'm merely leverage you can hold over the heads of those jackasses higher up the food chain."

"If that is the case then perhaps you should not have signed a longer contract."

"I did so because I've gotten too used to this shit."

"What shit, the politics, the protocol? There are many things within the military I can think of that would be referred to as 'this shit.'"

He expected the stunned look on the younger's' face, he hardly ever cussed near as much as he had. It had a lot to do with his foster mom teaching him how to choose his words to get what he wanted. Pulling strings and using a diplomatic approach was something he had learned to do expertly in his years climbing the ranks and working for his mother. However, he was growing tired of playing word games with Edward. The blond alchemist was used to the up front and often times brutally honest approach; it was the same approach as Fullmetal himself often took with others. As they are both adults it was time they were straight forward with one another.

"Well, especially this shit going on right now then," Ed managed to reply after a brief moment as he took a seat on the couch across from Mustang. Watching the way he moved the older man could tell that the other was still healing and no doubt those injuries were more aggravated now than they had started out to be yesterday morning. A healing collar bone, injured soldier, and immobile right arm had to be very strenuous especially on someone as active as Edward. Thinking on that subject once more he wondered once again what the other had learned from the young prince in Xing about this new enemy that had arrived.

Deciding that working his way to the topic was the best approach he broke the silence that had fallen over them both by saying, "I was informed earlier this morning that your brother, sister-in-law, and niece will be here sometime later today with a few things you left at Gracia's."

"Huh, well that's nice," Ed said in an offhanded way leaving the other to think he had something else on his mind. It appeared that he indeed seemed fully awake now if his mind was going enough to be distracted even when Al's name was mentioned in a sentence. Mustang was about to say something else when he was cut off by a sudden question of, "Why does my niece call you Uncle Roy?"

"Hmm, why would you want to know that?"

"I wonder, she has to see something in you to call you that, which is hard to believe really," Ed said with a smirk that seemed playful and teasing. That particular look on the younger man's face was much the same as the flirtatious looks that were cast towards him that night they had coffee. It was a pleasant night then and he was still lost as to what had happened to change Ed's reaction towards him other than the fact that he had indeed been very nosey in regards to the others' private life outside of Central.

"Why is it so hard to believe that I am actually a likable person?"

A short chuckle was his response, "Likable, more like punchable. I'm not surprised this psychopath has targeted you given your personality."

He let out a chuckle at those words, "Hmm, yes I do unintentionally end up making enemies here and there."

"Here and there? That's like saying I've only been here and there, you have more enemies than I have miles traveled."

"It seems I am not the only one with enemies, though I cannot help but to think this woman is more fixated than an enemy."

"The hell she's just fixated," the other growled a dark expression passing over his face as he continued, "that bitch posed as a doctor who had a play on words that always reminded me of how you work. Now's she out to prove we can't do anything to stop her from getting what she wants and I'll die before I let her have it."

That was news to him, he didn't really know much more than this woman was after Edward for some reason. Given the reaction the blond had he could easily fill in the blanks to come to the conclusion that Ed knew what she was after. So his next question should have been expected when he asked, "What is she after?"

But it was not, instead Ed locked up, going tense and his golden eyes taking on a more guarded look. His left arm twitched like he wanted to cross his arms over his chest but he couldn't due to his injuries so he settled with a glare. Remarkably the glare was directed towards the fireplace instead of at the man sitting across from him who had asked the question. The next words that were spoken were done so with closely leashed rage and were spoken in a soft and deadly volume, "She said she intended to make me her slave. That's never going to happen, I'll figure out how to kill her before I let it happen again."

'_Again? Slave? Kill her, surely Ed didn't mean that,_' but it looked as though he did. He was staring at the fire with hard, cold eyes that said he was serious about the threat he made. That Ed had it in him to kill another was something Mustang had not expected and not something he liked to see in the younger man. All of his life Edward had gone through one nightmare after another and always seemed to hold his morals close to his heart, yes something had changed in him after he'd disappeared but in that chaos no one had the time to notice such changes. Then there was the time right after the Promised Day when Ed had disappeared yet again for such a long length of time many believed him dead and the person who returned was not the Edward they all knew but a complete stranger who had gone through so very much that it was unimaginable.

While he longed to know what he could do to help pushing for answers only seemed to put thicker walls around the young man. Instead of touching that subject once again he reevaluated the others' words from what he knew of those two years before Ed returned. There was no way that the young alchemist had dealt with what he went through in Rousia, a despicable, narrow minded country, and through those experiences a dark, cold, hard place was carved into the younger man that would forever remain. But what truly plagued him was that Ed said he would never let it happen again, was he referring to his horrific experiences in Rousia with those words or did he know this woman from Rousia as well?

"Again?"

"Yeah, never again, Rousia is not happening to me ever again," was the answer.

It wasn't a good thing that Ed had endured but he still felt a bit of relief that it was what the other had gone through in Rousia that was being referred to and not something to do with this Quendalyn woman. He could account his relief to the fact that this woman seemed unstoppable and even more dangerous than even 'Father' proved to be for a reason he accounted to his sixth sense telling him so. Much of that had to do with how she was towards Edward only yesterday and the others' reaction to her presence. He had noticed everyone's uneasiness when Ed had actually backed down from her but he knew there were several reasons for such a reaction. It wasn't fully because of the trepidation and apprehension all of them had towards her but also because Fullmetal knew who to pick his fights with. After the display of alchemy and gun power proved useless all of them were at a standstill against her and the younger alchemist was already vulnerable against her attack when she had arrived. It had taken some time and Al actually explaining how his brothers' fighting style was for him to grasp the concept of Ed being capable of thinking things through in a fight. It was hard to accept given the seemingly brash and hot headed temperament of Edward as he was on assignment.

"You think entirely too much," Ed said to him pulling him out of his thoughts. This made him notice something, he felt relatively at ease with Edward here in his home even with everything going on. Only Hues generally made him feel as though he could let his guard down before, when had he developed that same level of trust around Edward?

"You hardly let others' believe that you think ahead at all," was the automatic reply. He almost regretted giving away the fact that he knew as much until Ed just smirked and leaned back into the couch to get comfortable once more. As he watched the other he noticed that it seemed the younger was thinking something over in his mind, as though he were considering saying something and weighing the consequences of his words. After a while he returned his attention to the fire to sort through his own thoughts on how he could get Edward to tell him if he knew anything about what was going on when there was a knock at the front door.

The comfortable atmosphere was broken then as both men raised to their feet their senses on high alert and ready to take on any threat. What sort of threat would bother knocking on the door was of little consequence given the state of things. Grabbing his gloves from his pocket, Hawkeye had long since drilled into his head to always keep gloves on his person; he motioned for Ed to follow him as he made his way to the door. Once he was close to the front door he grabbed the pistol he kept in the holster hanging on the coat rack and handed it to Ed who took it with a look of disgust but checked that the gun was loaded as he leaned back against the wall out of sight of the door.

Left hand poised to snap he reached out his right to grab the doorknob as he leaned against the door to look out the small hole in the high center of the door. A small enough hole to see who was on the other side of the door that was recently placed because of the high death toll of military officials and Hawkeye's recommendation on security measures. Seeing that Hawkeye, Al, and Winry holding Anna were standing beyond the door, the oldest woman with her gun held ready to fire he glanced at Ed and smirked before mouthing, 'Allies,' to which the other returned his smirk with a relieved one of his own.

However his grip on the gun did not lessen and his eyes still cast around the house looking for any signs of danger. Mustang turned back to the door and unlocked it before placing his hand back on the doorknob and opening the door. Hawkeye smirked when she saw the gloves on his hands and crossed the threshold to cast her eyes about the house. He held his hand up for the other three guests to wait a moment as the Colonel made a quick check of the house. She was taking the pistol from Edward currently and once the gun was put away he motioned the three inside the house, looked outside to see Falman and First Lieutenant Calahns by the military car.

Closing the door and locking it once more he turned to see Anna in her uncle's arms who had a strained pinch to the grin on his face. After he kissed her on the cheek and said a cheerful greeting in reply to her vice gripped hug her father took her from her uncle. Mustang smiled warmly at the sight and cleared his throat to say, "Why don't we all sit down in the living room," he offered as Al shifted the suitcase in his free hand to keep his older brother from taking it. Winry smiled in return to his words before she grabbed Al's arm and pulled him behind her to deposit him on the couch and took hold of her daughter to sit in the chair with the little girl perched on her lap. Ed made his way to the couch and sat down next to his brother.

Before long the three were engaged in conversation, the older participants talking vaguely about what had transpired yesterday due to Anna's presence. Winry explaining to her daughter that she could not sit in her uncle's lap because Ed was hurt and then Ed accepting her to sit next to him making Al move over for her to move between them. It was Hawkeye that pulled his attention away from the reunion with a meaningful look; he followed her to his office where they could speak in relatively private quarters. It was not a matter of whether Edward overheard them but whether Winry and Anna did. While he knew full well that the woman who was family to the Elric's could handle the truth of what was going on he worried about the youngest of the Elric's.

"We have not found her as of yet, but we are still combing the city sir."

"I have yet to find out what Edward knows that he isn't telling us. Though he is certain her objective is him"

She nodded as she looked around the cluttered and messy room. He would be embarrassed that everything was in such a state of chaos were more pressing things not at the forefront of his mind. She ignored the mess around him to cross the room and take a book from one of the higher shelves on the left. He noticed immediately that it was his copy of the history on Rousia. "Edward led me to believe that she has something to do with this country where he was held captive for two years. He did not make the connection between the two directly . . ."

"I am led to the same conclusion given what little information I gained from him before your arrival."

"How is he certain this woman's objective is indeed him."

"His words were that she claimed she planned to make him her slave."

Silence fell between them as Riza no doubt came to the same conclusion he had earlier, "Such words ensures that he will fight her to a degree of desperation to keep such from happening. This woman is very dangerous to be able to twist his emotions into something uncontrollable like that so quickly."

"Yes, there was no doubt upon seeing his reaction towards her and the recent disappearance of Dr. Susami that the two are not one in the same."

"This only adds a more definite level of danger to this situation. I do not like this at all."

"This is a battle that cannot be approached with brute force. I will see what I can gain from reading up on Rousia's history and asking Edward what he knows."

"We will continue searching for her although I doubt we will do her much harm we will try."

"Thank you Riza. Could you do me a favor as well?"

"Sir?"

He knew what her reaction to his favor would be as soon as he let the words out, "I'm in need of groceries, especially with an Elric under my roof."

She sighed irritably and rolled her eyes at him, a rare sight but one he was often on the receiving end of when it occurred. "While I do claim rights to protect you I am not your mother sir. I will send Havoc out to grab some more food for you."

"Not Havoc," he said with distaste, "the last time he was sent on food detail all he grabbed was junk food."

"This, to my understanding, is precisely what Edward prefers according to Alphonse."

"Perhaps you can have Alphonse give Jean a list to go by," he said in the tone of a question more than a statement. She smiled and some of the heavy tension of everything going on lifted a bit at this small matter. She nodded briefly, "Very well then. I will ask that Alphonse gives a list for you and Edward to Jean. I expect you two not to kill one another while I am not here sir."

"We haven't yet," he replied a bit insulted.

She only smirked and made her way back to the door flipping the book from her hand to his chest none too gently as she passed and said over her shoulder as he caught the book and turned to face her; "The day has only begun sir," before she walked out of the room leaving the door open behind her. It wasn't long before she could be heard speaking with the Elric's in the other room. Deciding he should at least socialize with his welcome guests he tossed the book to his desk, left the lights on as usual, and stepped out closing the door behind him.

Alphonse, Winry, and Anna returned to his house close to dinner time with Havoc in tow carrying armfuls of groceries with them. Anna ran over to Roy as soon as he admitted them entrance while Winry called for Ed who happened to be at the dining room table reading through one of his books that was inside his suitcase. He'd changed clothes soon after Hawkeye had ushered everyone out earlier with the promise they could all return later that night. Now he wore a long sleeved red shirt with baggy black pants with extra pockets on the bottom half of the pants' leg on each side. It made him look closer to his actual age, maybe even younger but Mustang decided to keep that to himself.

The remainder of the day had consisted of relative silence as the two alchemist dove into their own ideas of research to try and figure out some way to solve the problem of Quendalyn. They had eaten breakfast and a late lunch and Al had volunteered to make them dinner. Havoc was going to be taking watch so he would have to come get a to-go plate after the dinner was cooked. Neither Mustang nor Ed had said much of anything to each other too wrapped up in their own thoughts and theories to even notice the others' presence. Now that Winry was prying away the book from her brother-in-law and Anna was telling him all about her day at Gracia's and Elysia's version of her day at school via the three-year-old's words they were pulled completely away from what they spent most of the day doing.

" . . . And then Elysia drew a horsie and the teacher told her that it was really pretty and then the picture was put on the wall outside the classroom so everyone could see it. She drew me a picture of a horsie too but then daddy made a horsie out of the ground using alchemy and that was really awesome. Then, then Aunt Gracia said that soon I would get to start school and I could learn to do the same things my daddy and Elysia do."

"Anna, that's enough dear, let your Uncle Roy sit down," Winry said as she exited the kitchen having pulled both Elric's with her to put away the groceries. Havoc had a grin on his face as a pouting Edward walked out of the kitchen and sank into a nearby chair. Winry glanced at Havoc before she took Anna and handed her to the other man. Anna grinned at him and then sneezed and said, "You smell like smoke Uncle Jean," to which everyone chuckled when the other man grimaced at her words.

"Just how many aunts and uncles do you have Anna," Ed asked causing his niece to motion she wanted down which Havoc happily obliged as Winry set to moving everything off the table and sat down. Anna made her way to her uncle and with only a slight flinch he picked her up to set her on his lap as she grinned at him and began to answer his question. "Well I have Uncle Roy, Uncle Jean, Uncle Breda, Uncle Fuery, uh Uncle Eddie, Grandpa Dan, and . . . and Aunt Riza, Aunt Gracia, Nana, and Grandma Pinako."

"Huh, that's a lot to keep up with huh?"

"Yup," she nodded with a grin that really did seem to be an Elric trait it showed she was indeed related to Edward. "But, I love them all so it's okay."

"Who's Grandpa Dan and Nana?"

"That would be General Holigan and Mrs. Curtis," Mustang answered easily with a smirk.

"Geeze, even that old man and the crazy teacher are added to this crazy list?"

"Uh huh, Nana said I couldn't call her grandma because my Grandma Trisha died."

Ed paled for a moment before he offered her a gentle smile and a hug, "She doesn't like the word grandma anyway that hag."

"What's a hag?"

"Edward," Winry snapped making the younger man flinch, "I told you to watch what you say around my daughter and I meant it."

"Sorry," he said sheepishly before turning a dark glare at Havoc who stood snickering and snapped at the man, "shouldn't you be on watch or something?"

"Geeze boss," the other said before bowing respectively to everyone in farewell. It was good to see Havoc fully recovered from his injury via the humuculus Lust. That Hoenheim had helped to heal what the doctors' deemed an impossible injury was the power of the stone; the same could be said about his own gain from that stone in regards to his shortly stolen sight. He knew he could have still lived his life without his sight but his military career would have ended just as Havoc's had after that paralyzing injury. The military rarely accepted soldiers or kept them with disabilitating injuries, Ed was an exception because his automail proved as much of a strength as a weakness. The medical bills were taken out of the money owed to the alchemist for his services as a bargain for allowing someone with not one but two automail limbs to be in the military.

"Have a good night Havoc and stay safe," Winry said with a kind smile.

"I believe it's more my job to keep all of you safe Miss Winry," the oldest blond commented as he took his leave. Deciding to leave Winry, Ed, and Anna to entertain themselves he followed Havoc to the door so he could lock it behind the man. Havoc turned just before opening the door and stepping out to let out a sigh and say, "No leads on what or where that chick is yet."

"I suspect not after all we have seen she is capable of. We all need to stay on high alert because she will return."

"Of course, man after this is over with we should all go out for drinks or something."

"Hmm, we should, maybe you should take some time to do that between shifts."

"Work all day at the office then come here, when do I have the time."

"Make time Havoc; everyone needs to have a few drinks now and then if that is what they do to wind down."

"According to a bystander that was what the boss was trying to do yesterday."

"I'd heard Edward had taken a liking to going to the bar regularly."

"Yeah. We'll see ya' later chief."

"Of course, watch your back Jean."

"Always sir," the man said as he turned, opened the door and headed off into the night. Mustang locked the door and smirked at what Havoc had told him, it seemed they did have a lead as to how this woman knew where all of them were. She frequented the same bar that Ed and those in his command went to and most likely she was there. He remembered Havoc making a comment before about Ed having some message from a woman that came during the week asking for the younger alchemist. He knew it wasn't because of Sal and Mel but Hawkeye would not be forgiving to leave them off the list of suspects. Even this new enemy did not seem able to do everything herself, she had to have some help other than someone within the military.

That was not a large leap to make, connecting this woman with working with someone high in rank. There were still a few members of Bradley's old guard within the military and each one of them had a grudge against him, his men, and especially Edward who was responsible for 'Fathers' death. The fact that more than just Fullmetal made complaints against Dr. Susami and yet she remained and that she was a relatively 'new' psychiatrist and psychologist was suspicious enough. That she had gained access to classified files when she was not a high level doctor as of yet so soon after her employment bothered him as well. He knew that doctors needed as much information as they could get in order to given an accurate diagnostic but she became the only psychiatrist only three years ago after Ed had returned from Rousia and was employed as the military doctor in psychiatry only a year prior to that.

Still there were too many gaps left unfilled, where was she from, what was she, and what was her real purpose for what she was doing? Better yet why was it that both Ed and Hawkeye felt Rousia had something to do with this woman and her purpose? What had led Ed to believe that she had something to do with Rousia anyway? Hearing his name being called he turned and headed back to the kitchen to assist Al with making dinner since the younger man didn't know where all of the cooking utensils were. Winry and Ed entertained Anna with showing her one of Ed's alchemy journals that had circles in it. For now Mustang decided he would enjoy this small time of peace with those he considered as much part of his family as he wished to one day be considered in some way to the elder of the Elric family in the same fashion the other Elric's considered him part of their family at the very least.

_To Be Continued . . ._


	13. Chapter Twelve Part One

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story is something different from my usual stories. And it has a real plot (which generally means complex in my book) go figure, lol. I will try to give better notice before each change of view but I am certain the majority of this story will be seen through Roy's and Ed's point of views. This chapter is in two parts which I will add by the end of this week when it is finished. Happy reading._

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed Genre: Drama, Action Adventure Spoilers: Up until the current chapter of the manga. (Ch 99)**  
**Series: FMA Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**  
**Status: Work In Progress **  
**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**

_So you take your chances _  
_Watchful of the glances _  
_But don't turn away _  
_Though the wounds are healing _  
_Don't tell me the feeling's, the same_

_**-Temporary Heroes_Pat Benatar**_

* * *

**Chapter 12 - Part 1**

Ed sank back in his chair at the dining room table after having seen Winry, Al, and Anna out for the night with the promise he would stay where he was and at Mustang's side for protection or whatever. He knew someone had to have told at least Al just how powerless everything they threw at the arrogant woman was which was why he found it pointless to take so many precautions. He wasn't giving up on the idea of defeating her, hell no she was going to pay for he mind games and whatever the hell it was she had planned. Didn't mean he needed all this protection even if he was still hurt and he couldn't use his alchemy to the full extent of what he usually could, as his little brother was so kind to point out to him. Besides, staying here in the bastard's house was messing with his head and it was putting everyone in danger. Yeah, sure, everyone he happened to know knew their fair share of danger and all that but that didn't mean he liked the idea of someone getting killed because of him.

He and Winry had washed the dishes and talked about her progress finding a place to set up a shop here in Central. She had continued looking for the sake of making it look as though nothing was really going on, something Gracia had suggested she and Al do. The armed guard of soldiers that escorted them was explained as being of his own request on behalf of the fact that they happened to be his family. It was a good explanation but depending on how long this drug out it would get old. According to what Mustang had said the general public already knew something was up and they were of course pointing fingers at the military for the fact that the psycho bitch was still on the lose. 'Yeah, like I enjoy the fact she's immune to bullets and alchemy,' he thought sardonically. Going through his own notes and books didn't get him anywhere, he didn't have much of anything on Rousia and what he knew of the place he could picture it being religiously ruled and under the rule of a kingdom. Not that hard to do when they still had slavery active, outlawed alchemy to the point of turning an alchemist into a slave, and had a very huge, gaping hole between classes. Amestrius was actually pretty tame compared to that hell that was Rousia. What he really needed were books on the history of that country.

Of course though, he couldn't get a hold of those books. Maybe Mustang had a few, he hadn't bothered to ask because he really didn't want to do this kind of research. Why the hell did things seem to always lead him back down a road he didn't want to travel? Ling said he recognized the name from Rousian history, she always brought up the place in the sessions he'd had with her, and he had a nagging feeling that her always going back to his own mother was a key element in figuring out the full extent of her true objective. Every time he had to think about all the unclear connections that stood out in his mind he also ended up thinking back to his time spent in that hellish country which he never wanted to have to do again. But of course, those thoughts never let him remember all the small details of how the government was structured, he spent the bare minimum outside on the streets anyway so there wasn't much to go on. And the guards and shit that were his 'keepers' only kept going on and on with insults towards him and this and that when they weren't taking advantage of the fact that he was shackled, weakened, without his alchemy or his automail arm by beating the shit out of him.

"Edward," he jumped at the sound of his name to see Mustang standing in the doorway of the kitchen watching him closely. He'd been doing that all day, hell the man never seemed to take his concentration off him unless someone else was around. It made him uncomfortable and self conscious. He couldn't figure out why the man was always staring at him and it was irritating. He was a hypocrite though because he often caught himself staring at the other like this morning but it was aggravating because he'd spent long enough wanting something more than he thought he could have from the man and the attention he was being given right now. Not only that he also didn't know how he wanted to react if at all to the attention. That just shortened his temper even more, sure he could try to be civil but he wasn't certain how long it would last while he felt stretched too damn thin to sort out his thoughts let alone his emotions. Hormones were easy enough to ignore, he'd spent years on the road ignoring them, especially when he'd had to spend so much time with Ling and a Ling made Greed. That didn't make this any easier, he should have just asked Havoc or Hawkeye or hell Mike to let him stay with them instead even if Mustang happened to be the best choice out of pointless defensive choices.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, what do you want," he always tended to lean more towards his anger around the man, something familiar and comfortable. The small moments where he didn't even remember to be angry were moments when he knew he shouldn't let his guard down but instincts actually aimed him towards doing just that.

"I was told you thought there was a connection between this Quendalyn and Rousia, I'd like to hear why you think that."

Oh yeah, that nosiness and the fact that this guy never could let a subject drop bothered the hell out of him as well; "Her telling me she wanted to make me her slave kinda makes me think there's a connection."

"There must be another reason Edward, I'm more than certain you don't rely solely on your past experiences to determine the answers to something," the older man said as he took a seat directly across from him at the table. Sure he knew Mustang gave a damn about him and all that but sometimes the guy straight up interrogating him for information and it grated on his nerves. Taking a deep breath to try and calm some of his inner turmoil he watched the older man lean down to set something on the table. The two mugs of fresh coffee smelled great and he was grateful for the caffeine and would have smiled if he had the energy. Grunting his thanks as he grabbed the cup with his left hand he took a drink. Actually thankful for the slight burn on his hand for bringing his thoughts back together once more, he looked back up at Mustang.

"Ling said he recognized her name from the small amount of history scrolls he has on Rousia."

"Hmm, perhaps having friends in foreign lands is indeed handy. Have you been able to confirm what he said?"

"No," he snapped more in frustration at his own cowardly reasons that gave him no answers than at the question itself. "I don't have any books on that country. I was trying to find something in my notes and journals that might lead me to believe what he said was true but none of my own journals ever hinted at Rousia and their history."

There was some hesitation in the response and Ed knew what it was about even if the older man recovered quickly; "I happen to have a few books on Rousian History, though so far I have only found very vague mentions that refer to anyone named Quendalyn."

Ed sighed tiredly with suspiciously narrowed eyes at the unspoken question in the air. He knew the man had wanted to say something along the lines of 'You don't? Even with what you endured in that country?' or something but at least Mustang had enough tact not to voice those words. He had figured the prick had books on Rousia. He was a bit surprised the man hadn't found anything, but it was harder to find any clues when you had no idea what you were looking for. Taking another drink of his coffee, which actually had as much sugar as he liked, he turned his gaze to the staircase past the other end of the table in thought. Glancing to Mustang who was patiently waited for some sort of elaboration or explanation he looked back into nothing, "She was some sort of Goddess and Queen I guess. Apparently she was someone from this royal family that used to rule there, at least that's what Ling said. She was supposedly killed by their sun god who was invoked by who knows who but that's hard to believe if this Quendalyn is the same one mentioned in those scrolls."

"It could just be a legend, however given what we have seen of her abilities it sounds as though it is more than just a legend."

"Exactly, which pisses me off because we already know how hard it is to kill something that thinks it's a god," he said darkly as he turned his head down to gaze heatedly at the blackness of his coffee. Taking another drink and glancing to Mustang once more to see the man taking a healthy drink of coffee he shrugged with a wince reminding him of his fucked up arm and collar bone and leaned back in the chair, "But we do know its' possible so there has to be a way to take her out."

"I'm surprised to hear you speaking of killing someone as though it is such a simple task," Mustang commented a certain look in those dark eyes that reminded Ed of the man's past in the Ishballan Massacre even if it was Hawkeye who had told him about that war. Ed winced at the motion to shrug again, he had to stop trying that it was killing his shoulder. Looking back into his coffee he said simply, "Death is part of life, I learned that sometimes you just don't have a choice about it. Doesn't mean I'm going to go out and kill every criminal I see or anything. But this is different, she could be as dangerous as 'that guy' was and I'm not going to let all those people end up dead because of some power greedy, psycho, selfish bitch with a god complex."

"I see your reasoning, I just distinctly recall you once saying to me that no one has the right to take the life of another."

"Yeah, but I don't want to hear that from you. Soldiers have to kill sometimes, some kill more than they should, like that bastard Kimblee did. It was a childish ideal that just couldn't stick during all that shit of the 'Promised Day'."

"You don't have to justify it Edward, I know full well that you're not the type of person to kill someone unless there really is no other way to avoid it."

Ed hung his head, the guilt of the lives he'd ended weighing heavily on his shoulders. Even if he had not directly taken the lives of those who died because of his actions they were still dead because of him. All those people in Lior, literally hundreds of them had died because of what he'd done. Then there was the handful of soldiers he'd had to kill to keep hidden from the military. Then of course the guys he'd killed escaping Rousia so he could get back home as well as the few he'd ended up killing in Xing. Sure the ones' in Xing he'd killed had come too close to killing him and Ling so it was self defense, but taking life was taking life and he nor anyone else had the right to do that but it happened whether he liked it or not and he had to live with that.

"Yeah, thanks I guess, for saying that."

"I am only stating a fact that I and everyone who knows you is aware of Edward," Mustang said with certainty causing him to look up at the man and see that intense gaze focused solely on him once more. He looked away quickly not wanting or knowing how to face that gaze right now. He was grateful when the man rose to his feet and finished off his coffee at the same time as Ed decided to finish off his coffee as a distraction. Mustang took his cup off the table when he put it back down without a word and walked the short distance to the kitchen to fix them both another glass. When he returned he motioned with a slight tilt of his head to the living room, "Let's both take a look at what I have and see if we can come up with something."

Ed nodded and got up to follow after the man taking the offered mug from him after he took a seat on the couch. Instead of taking up residence in his chair Mustang sat right next to him on the couch and took a drink of his coffee before he leaned forward to place the cup on the coffee table and pick up an opened, thick, volume from the table. Ed watched the muscles in the mans' back move with him and had the insane urge to reach out and run his flesh fingers over the small expanse of his pale back that was bared from the raven haired man leaning forward.

Mustang cleared his throat and the smirk on the man's face made Ed blush and take the book held out before him with more force than necessary pulling the man a bit closer to him. He shifted uneasily on the couch and moved over as much as he could which wasn't really that much given that Mustang decided to sit down closer to the middle than off to the opposite end of the couch. He could already feel that tension building between them again that was present that night they'd gone out for coffee. Forcing himself to look at the contents of the book he scanned the words without seeing them for a few minutes unable to break his focus from the man's close proximity to actually read anything.

When the general moved over enough that Ed could breath without smelling him he actually realized what the words in the book were saying. Diving into the written words before him he kept catching keywords like reign, king, queen, prince, princess, kingdom, goddess, god, gods, and he stopped short when he caught a reference to Leto, a flux of life energy to create and destroy, even the word magic here and there. Getting up while carrying the book in his left hand he headed for the table to grab his pen from when he'd gone through his own notes. Leto and the magic and flux of energy he swore he'd come across before. While he didn't find anything on alchemy or any explanations of magic within the book he could tell it was there because it was mentioned.

_'The family royal possesth powers beyond the reaches of those beneath them. In this the Gods have granted them life beyond the reaches of peril and death. Servants fear and love those born blessed by the Gods and pray the Gods will protect them from peril, death, and suffering.'_ That was about all that was said of the Siberez Era which took place around the same time as what, he knew something significant happened in the same span of years as this Era the book was talking about. Wait, his father had lived for a long time, maybe that was the connection, did this Era happen when his ancestors were still alive?

"Ed, what did you find?"

He pulled himself out of his racing thoughts to turn to Mustang as he quickly marked all the keywords and that paragraph he'd found that went along with what Ling had told him. He explained after he finished pointing each one out in turn, "There's more than enough evidence in this book to point to what Ling was saying about this Quendalyn lady. It doesn't mention her by name but there is what I found about the people of Rousia worshiping the royal family like they were gods. They thought they were blessed because they had some abilities that everyone else didn't."

"This is something, what else did you come across?"

"All these damn words, they're all references to this Siberez Era or whatever. If I could find some book on that Era then maybe I could find some actual evidence pointing to her. You wouldn't happen to have one lying around this house would you," he asked sarcastically seriously doubting his luck would be that good.

"I don't believe I do, I would have remembered coming across such a book. I do have a book that tells about the Wars fought by Rousia or within the country itself."

"Maybe that will have something I can use," he began but as soon as the words left his mouth Mustang had already turned and headed back to the living room to grab the book. He grabbed both cups of now cold coffee and a few other books that Ed had seen lying around on the floor as well. Ed sat down at the table and slid the book across the table as he was handed the three other books Mustang had. Opening the one that directly pointed to the Wars in Rousia he flipped through the table of contents until he found the chapter titled _Wars Against Hierarchy_ and scanned through the words looking for anything that caught his attention. Two pages in and three paragraphs down he found something that he was certain was another piece of the puzzle. A war was started by a prince who disagreed with the King and Queen. Towards the turn of the war the power of a god was called down upon the royal house by the son himself to take down his parents and thus his sister and himself as a result.

_'Is that it? Is that all it says, what a load of shit. I need details, something that gives me a clue to what the other book said about magic and flux of life energy.'_ He slid that book aside and grabbed another one ignoring the title and scanning the table of contents looking for anything that caught his eye. It was somewhere in the middle of the book, a chapter on the _'State of Being'_ that stuck out in his mind. He'd heard so many different ways alchemy was described to not see the resemblance. Flipping through to that chapter he flipped through it not finding a thing until the second to last page that went on to explain the common people's name for a heightened state of being, magic. Marking that passage he went back to the beginning and found on the last page a chapter on _'Creation and Destruction'_. Going through to that he found too many similarities between the rules of alchemy he knew, the blend of the alchemy his father had known, and the alkestry of Xing for it not to be about alchemy.

He stuck his pen along the spine at the beginning of the chapter and grabbed the last book again not paying attention to the title and flipping through to the table of contents. Nothing really caught his interest until he found a chapter entitled _'Servants of the Gods'_. The very last chapter, sure enough he found a fifteen page chapter speaking about those the _'servants'_ served from the point of view of the servants. The educated way of speaking told him that someone else had written this part of the book because those 'servants' were actually slaves in Rousia now.

Grabbing his pen while Mustang read through the passages he'd marked in the first two books he marked passages that referred to each member of the royal family. He slowly began to notice a pattern, while most feared the queen and king and some even said they hated them and prayed the Gods would smite them for their cruelty many said the young prince and princess were very different from their parents. The princess was mostly described as a quiet, soft spoken, polite girl. Her brother on the other hand was the one which the servants expressed pity and sympathy for. He had to read further to find out why leading him to believe a lot of people didn't like talking about it.

This prince, whose name wasn't given at all, supposedly was treated like a slave even by his own parents because he openly displayed and voice his disgust and objection to the way the people of the kingdom were treated. Too often he was punished publicly and those who were not slaves began to hate the prince for causing so much trouble and dishonoring his family and the gods for the gifts he was born with. Further in this same servant explained that the prince was gifted more than even his parents in powers only the gods had but that he was reluctant to use those gifts to set them free because he feared the repercussions if he failed. After that it went on to talk about the war and that was when he put the pieces of what he did have together.

This wasn't some simple family squabble, it was a war much like the one that Amestrians had fought against Father and the Humunculi. But it was lost, why was it lost when the books said that the entire family was killed? Why was slavery still very much present in that country if that prince had succeeded in killing his parents? What the hell went wrong other than the fact that messing with power on that level had to be the most dangerous thing anyone could do, as 'Father' had shown everyone before.

If this Quendalyn chick was that same queen how was she still alive? Better yet, why was she so fixated on him and making him a slave again? He knew she'd shown up in Amestrius after he had already ended up in Rousia for a year, why did he feel like he was still missing something? He didn't protest when Mustang took the book he had in front of him too lost in his thoughts to really care much. He knew there was still a missing piece and he still couldn't figure out what her true objective was anyway. Plus he needed to know what the hell made magic and alchemy different from each other in Rousia if they even were different at all. They had to be different because whatever the hell she was or whoever she was happened to be immune to both bullets and alchemy and that was something these books hinted at being why the royal family was viewed as _'blessed by the gods'_.

Minutes or hours could have passed for all he knew by the time the silence was broken by Mustang saying, "This sounds very familiar."

"Yeah, a lot like what happened with 'Father' huh?"

"Yes that and well this prince reminds me of someone."

"Huh," he finally looked up at the man, "what do you mean?"

"He was willing to sacrifice everything for his country and its people. He stood up against those with power and endured many trials along the way. Doesn't that sound familiar? He was revered as a hero of the common people, something you happen to have in common with this prince along with many of the traits those in this chapter say this prince had."

That was it, that had to be the connection this Quendalyn was making, but why? "That's bullshit, this prince was some sort of saint or whatever. I've been through a lot of shit that was of my own making-"

"He chose to help those around him and stand against his family. Even on assignments I always had soldiers who went in to do clean ups saying that the community always had something good to say about you. You may believe you went on a quest for selfish reasons but you did a lot of selfless tasks for others all because you couldn't bring yourself to turn your backs on those who suffered. I have a feeling this Quendalyn sees the similarities between you and her son if she is indeed the queen mentioned in all these books."

"That's a load of shit Mustang, what the hell could she accomplish if I am a lot like her dead son?"

"Perhaps she is cursed by these gods that ended the royal family-"

"Which is another thing, if the family was killed then how could she be the same queen that's mentioned in these books anyway?"

"Let's say that she is-"

"Oh bull-" his breath caught in his throat when the other man leaned across the table to place a finger over his lips effectively stunning him into silence. When Mustang pulled back his lips tingled from the brief touch as though electrocuted and he just sat there and stared unable to make a coherent thought or remember what he was about to say. Mustang smirked and said in a voice that sent a shiver up and down his spine, that same, low, sexy as all hell voice that he had no doubt the bastard used to get women; "Please just listen to what I have to say for once Fullmetal."

He nodded dumbly, licked his lips and cast his gaze away when those impossibly dark eyes watched the movement before he cleared his throat and croaked, "Whatever," and sat back in his chair. As the raven haired man leaned back in his chair a thoughtful expression crossed his face momentarily before that mask returned and he began to speak in a normal tone of voice.

"Say this Quendalyn is one and the same as the queen mentioned quite a bit in these books and that she somehow survived but not without consequences. If this is the case then perhaps she has spent all this time searching for someone with the same attributes and thus power that her dead son possessed to try and reverse the process. If that is what she is after then there is no doubt the attack she places on this person that is so like her dead son is due to a deep rooted need for retribution against what she feels was wrongly cast on her. If she was indeed this very queen I have no doubt that in all this time her hatred for her son who damned her to whatever she is suffering through has grown."

"Okay, but that doesn't explain what the hell it was he did or what the fuck she's going through she wants reversed. Besides, I don't know what the hell this prince did to begin with and whatever it was had to have been on a large caliber to do what it did which is not something I will do anyway. So even if what you think is going on is what's going on then tough fucking luck to her in getting me to reverse it."

"I already knew what your reaction to this probability would be Edward, that may be why she hasn't attacked you at her full capacity yet. Perhaps she wishes to cast you into despair or attack you in a different form."

"Well hell, she's been doing that ever since I first had to go to those damn sessions."

Now there was definitely a readable expression on the man's face, one of outright anger and not the kind directed at him but a protective anger he knew full well because it was the same look as the one Ling had when those assholes from Rousia had the audacity to show up in Xing looking for him. That was an eye opener and now he knew Ling was right about telling him to just go for it, Mustang definitely felt more than just this shaky camaraderie or friendship they had going between them. A bit shocked to see such an open display of possessiveness and protectiveness on the man's face in reaction to his words he felt the angry words as much as he heard them leave the man's mouth in a demanding voice that evoked no beating around the bush in answering.

"What do you mean she's already attacked you?"

"Uh . . . I meant what I said bastard, calm the hell down will ya'?"

He knew something had shown in his expression because most of the outright rage left the man's expression but those obsidian eyes still burned through him making it seem impossible to lie. He swallowed and let out a sigh, "You know the word game pretty well and she knows damn near everything about my past, is it really that hard to figure out what I meant," he asked a bit concerned about the reaction he was going to get to those words.

"I see-I should have-I'm sorry Edward," now that look was gone filled with guilt, apology, and apprehension. Yeah, the man had kind of toed the line there but he was more stunned to see just how deeply the guy cared to be pissed off about it.

He offered a sort of smile he wagered and said, "S'not you're fault entirely asshole so deflate that head of yours. I kept bitching about it endlessly but the higher ups kept saying I _'had'_ to go so I went. Should have told 'em to stick it up their ass or somethin'. Look, she's a bitch, she always was and she loves to play the mind games and really got a kick out of pushing my buttons to the point I wanted to push her out the damn window but that's her fault not yours. Got it?"

"Edward . . . why didn't-"

"I'm not your lackey anymore Mustang. I went to the old man and his hands were tied just as much as yours would have been had you known. So just don't take the blame and shit, it's nothin' I haven't done to myself anyway so it's not a big deal."

"The hell it isn't," that anger was back damn, he should watch what he said more, Al kept telling him to think before speaking and he just kept ignoring the advice. "It's emotional abuse, physical isn't the only kind-"

"I damn well know that much bastard," Ed snarled remembering Rousia in a flash of horrid memories he had to swallow around to shove back down again. "I know all kinds of abuse, want me to describe them. Don't do that parental bullshit with me."

"Why do you always shoulder everything as though you're the only one at fault? Why in the hell, what is it that makes you feel as though everything that goes wrong around you is your fault?"

"What the fuck, we're not having this conversation Mustang," he replied sharply and moved to get up. Mustang put his hand over his own and that gave him paused before he jumped to his feet and pulled away with a snarl, "What the hell? You think you can sit there and psychoanalyze me like you have any idea what goes through my head? I'm not a puppet you can read and pull the strings of. I know damn well what is and isn't my fault. I'm not blind to the consequences of my actions or my inaction. You said earlier that I was selfless because I helped people, did you ever stop to think maybe I help people when I can to make up for the ones I couldn't help? You're not the only one around here that's cost too many people their lives or even killed some of them yourself."

"Edward what are you-? Please calm down, I didn't mean to sound condescending or say you don't know suffering. Damn it I know you know what suffering is, I've seen the after math of that suffering and I hate it because someone as young as you shouldn't have to face all the things you have to face."

"Shut up, just shut the hell up. You, who lied to me, who kept guarding me like I was some child who couldn't take the full brunt of what I brought on people-"

"I was only trying to help keep you focused, you didn't need to know-"

"The hell I didn't. Oh fuck this, this is such an old argument I'd rather just punch you and get it over with. You were telling me not that long ago that I shouldn't keep everything to myself, trust someone and tell them what's going on with me right? Yeah well, you first jackass, I gotta lay my soul bare then I expect the same from you. You want to know why I was so pissed at you the day after our 'date' or whatever? It's because I can't stand the idea of letting myself be that vulnerable to someone that doesn't trust me with the truth and damn it all you are the shining example of the typical adult that wants to keep the 'child' in the dark to 'protect' them. I'm not a kid, haven't been for a while, don't even remember what being a kid even felt like."

"What do you want to know?"

"What?"

"Equivalence right? That's what you want, for me to be honest? So what do you want to know?"

"Oh hell no, it's not that simple. You know what, I'm going to bed because if I stay right here then I'm going to have to hit you. So yeah, you think about what I said and then you figure out what you want and that shit. I'm not up to playing these games, got a really shit one going with a crazy, should be dead, ex-queen right now to keep me busy."

"Edward, I'm sorry for being a demanding bastard."

"Yeah whatever, just shut up and go to sleep. Maybe I won't hate you in the morning or something."

"I'd rather you not hate me now Edward."

"Shut the fuck up Mustang, just shut up," Ed took a deep breath and stalked out of the room stomping his way up the stairs and to the guest bedroom. He couldn't believe this shit, one minute they were talking about theories on what was going on, a probable history, then they started on about that bitch and his sessions with her and it escalated beyond his control. He closed the door quietly once he made it to the room and leaned back against it before sliding down it to the floor. He couldn't believe he'd just blown up like that, again. Mustang didn't really deserve this bullshit, it wasn't him in particular, the guy did give a damn and he did respect him and do stupid shit with good intentions just like everyone else who had good intentions. So why was it that everytime they were around one another shit got out of hand and he lost his temper.

He must actually be losing it or something, his fuse kept getting shorter and shorter and shit just wouldn't leave him alone. Bad habits from Rousia and traveling and just everything kept coming to the service. In Xing he wasn't this temperamental and harsh, he was actually a lot more mellow and a bit more positive really. What the fuck was going on with him that kept flipping this switch in his head to make him blow up? If he ended up snapping at Al or Anna then that was going to be the last straw. He could reason away his temper towards Mustang in being a result of those years of animosity and rivalry and shit but he wasn't that out of control anymore, he didn't need to be was too old to act like some angry teenager anymore. He should apologize for his behavior but the anger from before still lingered.

What the hell was going on to cause this shit? He had to reign in his temper better before he pushed the man further away than he already had. Might as well have pushed the guy off a cliff with the way he'd reacted, not to mention he'd said more than he'd meant to and even made references to shit in his past he hadn't told anyone about. Was his only means of opening up that much through a display of anger? What that all he had left to get past his own defenses was anger? Who the hell would want a relationship with someone that could blow up at you at one wrong word?

Thinking along the lines of what he was he started thinking back on those sessions he'd gone to and the things that were brought to his attention about himself. It wasn't just through that bitch that he began to question his real reasons, Ling had already started him on that road and then Izumi and Armstrong had as well. He was being childish and he was acting it on top of that and now really wasn't the time for that shit. He wasn't twelve anymore, he should know better. There was also the fact that he couldn't take out all his anger on the man who was trying everything he could think of to help him. Ed knew Mustang was trying to help and wasn't prodding him to be a prick, the man worked with the information he was provided and he felt uncomfortable when he was left empty handed and knew someone who could give him a bit of insight.

Running his left hand through his hair and ignoring the pain in his shoulder from the action he let out an exhausted sigh and let his head bang once against the door as he brought his hand to his right shoulder to feel the hard, cold, metal of his automail. That was really where this long hard road had begun but it wasn't the beginning of his problems. No, this insecurity, the defensive anger he always seemed to fall back on went back even further than that.

Ed's sudden realization of what may have subconsciously caused his father to be suspicious, insecure, foolish, standoffish, and fearful enough to leave his family to protect them other than because of his connection to Father. It very well may have been guilt as well as that he was raised as a slave. Having found out first hand what it is like to be a slave- how it's degrading, humiliating, depraving, cruel, in human, left him feeling helpless, weak, and worthless despite the abilities he has- alchemy, his bravado, temper, fighting skills, all the things he has already lived through meant nothing at all. Ed became acutely aware of what his father must have endured growing up. It left him feeling detached, unwelcome, unwanted, and vulnerable as well as worthless and weak. Such feelings had his guard up as well as pushing others away afraid they would see what he'd been reduced to at his very core during his imprisonment in Rousia.

All of those feelings and experiences had been engraved in him, he could never undo such damage anymore than his father, who was born into slavery, could. Those experiences would forever be a part of him and it was easy enough to figure out that now that he knew how it felt that his father must have always felt the way he currently found himself feeling. It was also a matter of thought to be able to conceive how his father must have felt to live through what he had been put through in the last two years. Growing up always treated like an animal, like nothing more than a laborer, to have no rights or independence and become entirely dependent on another for the necessities and any luxuries. He had come to redefine what were luxuries and what were necessities now, though he had never wanted for anything in regards to himself, he had learned to appreciate the small luxuries he had always thought were his right to have. To be able to wear what he wanted, to go where he wished, to tell someone to fuck off and not get reduced to a mass of painful flesh, to eat until he was full instead of stretching out what he was given to survive . . .

Slaves were meant to be kept ignorant, which was another luxury he had while growing up, being given the choice to learn and be taught. Slaves were meant to be kept ignorant so that they could not rebel or develop independence and wish to rebel against their enslavement. Hoenhiem had broken that rule which Ed felt prideful about in regards to his father's obstinacy. He could grudgingly admit it was a trait he had and carried with pride that was in common with his father. But who had given his father a chance to learn who provided the material, taught him alchemy? Obviously, he knew who it was, 'Father' had considering his knowledge of Xerxes and Amestrian alchemy as well as Hoenheim's shared knowledge of both. He already knew that he and Al were related to the people of Xerxes, in fact with their father now dead they were the last ones with that ancient blood running in their veins.

But he had also come to the conclusion that his father was part of what had decimated the people of Xerxes and he was aware through his own experiences that it was easy to be blind of the consequences of alchemy when you were driven to make the results occur. His father had carried that burden with him for so very long and had been part of that very stone that was created through the sacrifice of his own people. He was a fool for not having listened to his father then, when he had told him he was being a child when he had saught to right the wrongs he had committed and he knew now that his father was right. He had burned the house down because he told himself it would keep him ever coming back and giving up but in all truth he wanted to be rid of the evidence. He was the one at fault for those years Al had lost while bound to a suit of armor. In that he had been dragged into a plot full of danger and weighted with the survival or destruction of his own home country.

Yes, he had managed to stop it with the help of all those around him, those he never would have met if not for the sins he had committed, but that did not make change the fact that so much had happened as a result of his own actions. So many whose lives were changed and lost because of the decisions he had made. He may not have been thrown in a war but he felt as though he had lived through one all the same. The people of Lior, Rose, her life changed and the things she had been put through, the risks and trials those in Mustangs' command had been through. Hues' death would forever weigh heavily on his shoulders, his death pained him more than the deaths of those whom he had killed with his own hands. Those that had died by his hand had died out of necessity so that he could protect those he cared for. He could tell himself that and it be the truth, but he wasn't idiotic enough to not realize that he was still the one who must carry the weight of their deaths on his shoulders and their blood on his hands. He had taken lives, killed with his alchemy, his bare hands, and he had taken the lives of those who very well could be sons, fathers, husbands, brothers . . .

Presently, Ed had no choice but to accept the price for his mistakes and carry it around with him. But it was a price only he must pay so he was content with that since they were very well his own sins. His own father had wanted to scare him, to use tough love to steer him away from fucking up or carrying the weight of an entire country on his shoulders. He had been trying to protect him because he had known all too well the price demanded to get Al's body back and did not want his sons to suffer more than they already had. But Ed could not live with the burden of ripping his brother's life away from him nor could he allow Al to continue to pay the price for the mistake he, as the older brother, made. He knew that getting Al's body back was as much for his own sake as it was for Al's.

He was a selfish, ungrateful, idiotic brat. But another thing he had in common with his father was that his father could no longer bear the burden of having a hand in the extermination of an entire race of people and so saught to resolve himself of that, or at least make amends, by saving another race and country he would be relieved of his sins. Both father and son were foolhardy and selfish in their acts to right wrongs they selfishly dragged other people into paying the toll for them to commit in the first place. In this he could see the real reason his father had left.

Hoenhiem had left so that his family did not become burdened by his mistakes. They would have become pawns or target's of Father's to ensure Hoenhiem's co-operation when the time had come. So he had distanced himself and traveled to stay off the radar. But then Ed had done what he's done and all but painted himself as a target in his search to set things right through the Stone. Father had been so arrogant as to claim that all the things that had happened to bring the five of the alchemists that he had needed as sacrifices had been his doing. He had left Hoenhiem alone hoping he would start a family so that he could have more sacrifices and while he would have preferred to use only those of his student's blood he had already found a suitable sacrifice in Mustang. The war was a means to create another stone powerful enough to allow him to last long enough to wait for the family of Hoenhiem to grow. Those that had survived the war was by Father's wishes and Ed and Al's promise as alchemists had made him look to their teacher thus involving her. After everything was said and done Ed couldn't help but to feel responsible for it all even if he was not the one who had orchestrated it.

His father had tried to warn him off but he had been to arrogant to listen, to afraid of forever carrying the burden of what he had cost Al and knowing he would have no choice but to carry it if he did not undo that sin. Al's existence had been completely dependent on Ed's own life, if Ed died then Al ceased to exist and so if he had not been able to return Al to his body then Ed would have no choice but to carry that with him forever would have made him want to end his own life, but he never could have because he knew doing so would end Al's in turn.

Now, as an adult he could see that his father had cared, had loved them, and that leaving them and his mother had been the hardest thing he had even done. His father had regretted leaving, especially after seeing that his efforts had not prevented his son's from meeting and becoming involved in Father's plot but consequently caused them to become involved. He knew his father and he thought alike in that respect, his father no doubt thought the same as Ed did. He saw that because he had left his family, their mom dying and thus leaving them alone and making them be dumb and desperate enough because of the hurt and loss that had caused, had resulted in their dangerous attempt to bring her back and thus put them on Father's radar even though they had been since they were born anyway.

Realizing his own similarities had not made him feel as bitter about it now as it would have a few years ago. After watching his mother slowly die of a broken heart and after knowing and feeling the loss of a loved one he had sworn to himself he would never do that to those who cared about him. But he had, he had hurt Al, Winry, his friends, he had caused everyone around him plenty of pain and suffering. And now, now he was pushing them all away and causing them even more pain. But why, for what reason did he keep doing so when he knew that he was just causing them even more pain?

Was it fear? Was he afraid of being hurt, was he actually feeling hurt and afraid they would leave him like his father had after never thinking about that all this time? Were his own similarities and similar experiences making him seriously believe he might do as his father- no he already was doing that, not to just his friends but his own brother who he had already caused enough pain to. He was a hypocrite, he had sworn not to do that, not to hurt those he cared for and here he was doing so anyway. He also needed to admit, accept, and move past the fact that he was hurting because his father was dead instead of trying to ignore those feelings and shove them down.

He also needed a good ass kicking for being so damn stupid. Everyone was trying to help him and be there in anyway they could, because they cared and worried about him and he was doing everything he could to stay away from them all. He had left shortly after he had made it back to Amestrius from Rousia and then when he returned from Xing he wanted to go up North to get away from them all. Here was a perfect example of how he kept hurting those that cared about him and he cared for. All of his friends and family knew different things about him, knew of some of his sins, and they still wanted to be a part of his life but he continuously pushed them away.

Why would he want to do that to Al, Winry, Izumi, Mustang's command or the man himself when they had all done so very much for him and seen him at his worst and best moments? He knew in his heart they would accept who he had become and would feel angry and sympathetic when they learned of what he had been through that made him want to keep them at a distance. But so many of them would want things to go back to normal or would feel honored to know that much or just tell him to grow up and move on. With a smirk and a familiar feeling of resignation and determination burning in his chest he made his decision. He would try his damnedest to make sure he stopped pushing them all away and stop with this feeling sorry for himself bullshit he was pulling.

He wasn't going so far as to apologize to Mustang after having chewed him out, but he would make an effort to find a way to make sure the man knew he was grateful to him for all he had done for him and Al as well as for sticking around and putting up with him. It was time he stopped running and hiding and took control of his own life once again. He was exhausted from all that thinking and feeling and he was beyond sore, with a long, drawn out yawn he he pushed himself to his feet, stripped down to his boxers and blindly cross the room to crawl into bed. Pulling the blanket up to his shoulder he tried to get comfortable and drifted off into another night or troubled sleep.

**End of Part 1**


	14. Chapter Twelve Part 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Eventual Roy/Ed **  
**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure **  
**Spoilers: Up until (Ch 99) of the manga.**  
**Series: FMA **  
**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**  
**Status: Work In Progress **  
_**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed  
**_

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* * *

Chapter 12 Part 2**

Three days, three damn days and he was still at the same fucking conclusion he'd come to those three damn days ago. No, he had not apologized to the bastard for being a brat and yes the tension was still there between them. Hell they were both getting tired of one another and being locked up in the house after the first full two days of being around one another was not lessening the urge to _'play nice'_. Hawkeye had returned last night with no news on finding the woman who had caused this mess and with orders for Mustang to return to work.

Therefore, Ed was now sitting at the dining room table with notes, books, and a cold cup of coffee covering much of the surface. Havoc and Breda were in the living room playing chess and keeping silent, a medal worthy task for those two idiots. The only reason for their silence happened to be the several volumes of books that Ed had thrown at them a few hours ago when they broke his concentration with their damn gossip about this woman and that woman and different bars they frequented and wanted to go back to. Ed had bitched them out about that shit too telling them they didn't have to be there, he could damn well take care of himself, and that had shut them up with guilt for a little while before they'd started up again.

He was at a stand still, he didn't have anymore books to go through, Al had brought him every book he could find from the public libraries and Mustang had even gotten some from the National Library after they hit a dead end the first night they started on this research into the history of Rousia. He wanted to set fire to each and every volume for being so damn useless to what he was looking for. Growling at the passage about some damn 'founding father' of Rousia he slammed the book closed violently.

"Yo boss, why don't you come play some chess and take a break," Havoc called out to him. With a grunt he pushed his chair away from the table, stood up, grabbed the cold cup of coffee and took it to the kitchen to rinse it out and made a fresh cup. He had to make more coffee he had just used the last of it. He put his sugar in the drink and then carried it with him to the living room where Havoc and Breda had pulled the couch and chair closer to the coffee table to play chess comfortably.

Sitting down after Havoc got to his feet and moved away so he could stretch his stiff muscles from sitting most of the day Ed sat down in the vacated seat, Breda set up the chess board and Havoc declared as he headed for the door, "Goin' out for a smoke break." Ed watched Breda wave the comment off distractingly and then the man's gaze drifted to him. There was definitely a question brewing in the guys' mind and given his foul mood Ed knew he wasn't going to like it.

"So, I heard you nearly ripped the chief's head off the second night you were here?"

"Heard from who, did the asshole show up at work whining about it or something," Ed commented haughtily.

"No, I've spent a long time in the military and around both you and Mustang to know when you two are fighting," was the calm reply.

Ed took another drink of his coffee before he sighed and motioned to the chess board, "Let's just play some chess."

"Alright, but I want to offer a wager during this game of chess."

"A wager, on what?"

'Well more like a game of questions and answers actually," the man said as he moved one of his pawns forward one space.

Ed looked at the man suspiciously but he didn't budge or give anything away, instead the man met his gaze steadily. He liked Breda, the guy was funny, intelligent, and he was one of the few out of Mustang's command who didn't pry into anyone's personal lives or really seem to want to know about them in the first place. Remembering that much he nodded once and said, "Fine by me, what're the rules?"

"Simple, when I take one of your pieces I get to ask you a question and you give an honest answer. Same goes for me of course, that whole equivalence thing you alchemist go by applies in this game."

"So I can ask you anything and you'll answer truthfully then?"

"As long as the questions are within reason, so save the stupid ones for a night at the bar alright," Breda said with a grin.

Another nod and Ed said, "Sure, whatever," and moved his far right pawn forward one space.

Breda moved his left pawn forward two opening up a hole for his other pieces on that side of the board. Ed studied the board for a minute before he moved one of his center pawns forward once. It was a full ten minutes of making moves against one another before Breda finally managed to take one of Ed's pawns due to the fact that both of them were playing defensively. Ed could picture Breda also taking his time between each move to think of possible questions he wanted to ask or possible questions he might be asked. Both of them looked up as Breda picked up the murdered pawn as Havoc came inside.

They watched the other blond walk into the kitchen and return with one of the dining room table chairs to set it on the other end of the coffee table on the opposite side from the fireplace. After a moment of both of them looking at him the man shrugged, "Like I'm not going to be entertained by two genius playing this game. Hell, I think the chief would be a good opponent against either one of you."

"That arrogant bastard would make sure he was good at this game," Ed replied sourly. He shouldn't still be pissed at the man but he couldn't help it, it was second nature to him. He looked back at his opponent who smirked as he held up the pawn making Ed glare at the older man, "I never agreed to play this game with this joker listening in."

"You already agreed to my terms," the man replied with a smirk. He twirled the piece in his hand then set it on the table, "Question one then. What happened to make you so pissed at the chief?"

Havoc laughed which earned him a glare before Ed sighed, "Same old same old. He jumped to conclusions and ran his damn mouth."

"We did agree on honesty being the policy here."

"You want the details or what?"

"A better idea of what happened would be ideal."

"Okay, we started off with these theories about that psycho bitch that has it in for me and apparently him too since she attacked him and Hawkeye outright and all. Then one thing led to another and we ended up in this bullshit conversation that pissed me off."

"Sounds like the typical Edward and Mustang fight to me," Havoc commented. Ed reached over and punched him in the arm with his left hand which made him wince but was worth it for the hurt look he got and the way the other rubbed his arm. Breda chuckled and said, "Alright then, you two can handle that front. It's your move."

The game went on for about three hours and by then Mustang walked in the door just before Breda took out his king. It wasn't a complete loss though, Ed had one more piece on the board than Breda and Havoc had gotten bored with the question game half an hour ago when they started in on the what's your favorite types of questions. Breda liked home grown beer over the others, he preferred Nectar's out of all the bars he frequented. He happened to have a crush on Mel when he'd first met her but then found out she was married. He had two brothers and a sister but they lived in West City so he hardly got to see them.

He considered Havoc his best friend and was fine with spending his time around him since it made him being away from his own family a bit easier. He would rather travel and try all kinds of food than be in the military but he swore to stay by Mustang's side and wasn't backing down on his word. He also thought Hawkeye and Falman could be the most boring people in the world at times and that Mustang was a git which they had a good laugh over. As far as the questions went he'd asked Ed what he knew about Quendalyn, how his time in Xing was, why he'd stuck in the military even though everyone knew how much he hated it sometimes. Then he went on to ask about what Ed liked to do outside of running around attracting trouble and re-leveling towns. He got a pawn thrown at him for that one.

They also went over their favorite colors, Ed's was black while Breda's was orange. Then their favorite foods, Ed picked Xingnese and Breda chose bar-b-q. The what would you like to do with your life if you had the chance came up as well. Breda wanted to find a woman to marry and open a restaurant after he traveled the world while Ed just said he wanted to still be alive and able to watch Al and Winry find a place they could call home and see his niece grow up to be the great woman he knew she'd grow up to be.

It was this last question that caught him really off guard. Breda even waited while rotating Ed's king in his hand for Mustang to close and lock the door, shed his shoes and jacket, walk to the kitchen and grab a cup of coffee and come strolling back into the living room to take the chair Havoc had vacated. He scanned the board, smirked, then looked at both of them, "What is going on?"

"We had a game going, for every piece taken we asked a question we swore to answer honestly," Breda explained. Mustang nodded once in understanding and then asked, "Seems that while you won the game Ed conquered the question asking criteria."

"Uh yeah, anyway, ask your last question already," Ed said to Breda who was still smirking in victory. When there was still a pause Ed felt a bit apprehensive about the question that was going to be asked. He wasn't wrong to be apprehensive, it was an unexpected question that was asked.

"How did you end up in Rousia?"

He knew both of them were watching him closely and looked to the empty fireplace as he thought back on that. He hadn't ever thought about how he'd ended up there, hell all he had cared about was getting the hell out of that country while he was there and then surviving the trek to Amestrius. Crossing Drachma's boarders was the hardest part and harder still was getting inside Briggs without any means to prove he was who he said he was. Hell he'd slipped up when he got to Briggs and introduced himself by the slave title they gave him. Shaking his head to clear it he thought back on that day he'd woken up in what he later found out was Rousia.

It was after the fight against 'Father' he knew that much because he still remembered that fight like it happened yesterday. It had to have been after getting Al back and the fight between him and Mustang over Hoenheim's actions because he remembered that as well. He remembered the hospital too but he couldn't remember leaving the hospital and going to Resembool so it had to have happened between those two events.

"Edward?"

He looked over at Mustang who, like Breda, looked concerned as well as curious to what was going through his head. He sighed, "When was I reported missing back then?"

"At the hospital, Al woke up one morning and you weren't there," Breda answered without hesitation. He could imagine what was going through everyone's heads when that happened. Al would have been frantic and hysterical. Mustang would no doubt be furious and then Hawkeye would be really suspicious and the entire place would have been torn apart looking for him. It would have been hell for the hospital staff to control everyone trying to find him. Winry would have shown up and yelled, shouted, cussed, and threatened to beat the living hell out of him with a wrench when he was found. Then there was everyone else, like Izumi, geeze his teacher would have literally torn the place apart and ripped Mustang a new asshole. He wanted to smirk at that thought but couldn't really find the humor in it.

He couldn't help feeling guilty about how hard that had to have been on everyone. Two years without word about where he was, worried about whether or not he was alive, why he'd disappeared, who the hell had the gumption to kidnap him and make it impossible for him to send word for so long. If he were in Al's position he would have gone crazy and spent every available resource traveling to every reach of the world to find him. He would never wish what he went through on anyone and if he ever had to go back he'd kill every last one of those fuckers that disciplined and owned slaves and anyone else who stood against him doing it.

"I don't really remember much of it . . . the hospital was the last thing I can remember," he commented quietly still trying to sort out his thoughts. Closing his eyes thoughtfully he backtracked to that time Al was hospitalized to recuperate from getting his malnourished body back. He remembered going to sleep around the same time Al had, both exhausted from the fight against 'Father' and the emotional roller-coaster they'd spent months on during the fight against the Orobos as well as running from the military. He remembered going to sleep really well, he even remembered waking up and using the restroom and walking out of the room to stretch his legs after checking on his brother.

He tried to retrace his steps, tried to remember faces he might have passed or when and where he was undoubtedly attacked. He did remember the way his head had ached and his throat felt rough, scratchy, and dry along with the taste of chloroform and all the great after effects that went along with it. Where the hell had he gone and why the hell had he walked so far anyway? When he swore under his breath and deciding this was as frustrating and figuring out that bitch Quendalyn's angle that was when it came together in his mind.

Thinking about her sent a sharp jolt of pain straight through his skull. The violent effect had him gritting his teeth against it and feeling even more determined to figure out what really happened when he'd disappeared. The more he focused on that moment the more his head hurt and his stomach decided to twist and churn along with it. Clenching his fist until his knuckles were white and grinding his teeth against the internal onslaught he felt a foreign energy blocking his way. That bitch did something to make him forget about what happened. Yeah well he had his own reserve of energy and he used that to shove at the force blocking his way. He felt it snap in two and could feel the tension of the other two in the room who probably didn't even know they were emitting their tension.

Taking a deep breath to try and calm the tension running through his own body as the pain subsided after one more flare he took the dive to those memories again. Those blank spots in his memory filled in, he'd seen her posing as a doctor and had followed her trying to ask her about how long it would be before Al was released from the hospital like the impatient child he was. She'd turned with a pleasant smile and told him he didn't need to concern himself with such trivial matters or some shit. That bitch was just as fast then as she proved to be now, one moment she had this fake smile on her face and the next he was against a wall with a cloth soaked in that damn chemical covering his face. He'd fought back, instincts made sure of that but his startled and angered shout was what did him in.

Blinking his eyes open he got to his feet feeling restless and angry that he hadn't realized she was the whole reason behind all of this shit and Rousia sooner. He should have known, he should have remembered it before. But it was his own fault he hadn't, he spent so much time after that hell trying to forget about the place and shoving every memory that came to him further and further away. He paced in front of the fireplace and growled low in his throat before he turned back to Breda and Mustang who looked on curious, concerned, and a bit defensive and apprehensive.

"It was her," he said angrily to which the two exchanged confused looks before they both seemed to come to the same conclusion simultaneously.

"You mean this Quendalyn chick was the one that attacked and kidnapped you back then," Breda asked cautiously.

"Yeah, it was her. I was trying to remember that night when I disappeared and started getting frustrated about this shit going on now . . . I remember what it felt like when I woke up, my head hurt like it was slammed up against something and felt foggy, my throat felt like someone shoved sand paper down my throat and I damn well know the taste of chloroform pretty fucking well. When I thought about that bitch everything just fell into place."

"How did you run into her?"

"I was walking around the hospital, stretching my legs and had saw her. Thought she was a doctor and could tell me when Al might be released, you know I'm an impatient brat and I hate hospitals so of course I would ask that kind of stupid shit. Anyway, I ended up lost or whatever and she said something like 'I shouldn't worry about such trivial matters' or whatever and then she attacked me. The bitch has always been faster than shit, one moment you're looking her in the face, the next she has a hold of you and there's nothing you can do about it."

"That does sound like her, but she wasn't in Amestrius until-"

"That's not entirely true sir," Breda said cutting off Mustang who looked at him a bit startled. Ed looked to the two of them before settling his gaze on Breda expectantly. The man continued, "I did a bit of digging around and found a few reports that distinctively put her in Amerstrius months before the 'Promised Day' began. She apparently graduated from medical school here in Central, so she was never posing as a doctor, she really does have the degrees to be one and the experience."

"What do you mean? Why didn't you inform me of this?"

Breda cleared his throat, "I was not sure it was relevant until recently sir. According to what I found she attended medical school here and then transferred to the South to become a field medic. When she retired from that she returned to Central to get a degree as a psychiatrist and went on to earn a degree as a psychologist. This all happened before that deal with the humunculi started up. We all thought she arrived here just after Ed disappeared but she was already here and was offered a position as a military psychiatrist and psychologist after the boss disappeared."

"So she's spent a great deal of time developing and carrying out the steps to this plan?"

"That's my opinion, but that still doesn't explain what her true objective is."

"We do know one objective she has," Mustang replied darkly, "she actually told Ed she intended to make him into her slave."

"There is much more to it than that. She's painted Ed a target far longer than we thought. Do you have any idea how long it takes to earn all the degrees she has or that she spent the bare minimum of four years as a field medic?"

"That could mean she decided to target Edward before he even became a State Alchemist."

"Exactly."

Ed's expression darkened at Breda's confirmation of Mustang's words. Instead of finding any answers to the endless amount of questions all they had were even more questions. What was worse was that not only did this bitch have a really shitty hidden agenda she had always had him figured into all those plans before he'd even thought about putting himself in the position he'd ended up in. This just made him feel angrier and more threatened and cornered than he had after realizing the bitch happened to be immune to alchemy and bullets, moved with unrealistic speed, and had every bit of ammunition she needed to use against him.

Moving back to the couch and shoving down the urge to cuss, yell, shout, or put his hand through a wall he instead just sank into the couch, put his elbows on his knees, leaned forward, and fisted his left hand in his bangs. He growled threateningly when Mustang moved to lean over and place a hand over his shoulder which he caught in his peripheral vision. Breda got up and cleared his throat before he said as calmly as the obviously shaken guy could, "I'm going to go give the Colonel an update. Still have to give the intelligence I have over to General Holigan. You going to be alright kid?"

"Yeah," Ed muttered and looked up, the anger showing through and radiating off him enough to make him feel feverish with it, "thanks for the game Breda, it was enlightening."

The man chuckled darkly, "Yeah, sure thing. Sorry about the bad outcome," then he turned with a salute to Mustang and, "See ya' tomorrow chief."

"Goodnight Heymans, watch yourself."

"Yeah, you two do the same and try not to kill each other."

He watched Mustang watching Breda walk out the front door after unlocking it then made his way to the door to lock it back. Mustang turned and regarded him for a moment then said as calmly as he could, "Did you two bother to eat anything during your chess game?"

"No," Ed replied with a deep sigh. Mustang nodded and made his way to the kitchen silently before saying as he opened cabinets, "how about chicken, I laid some out earlier and forgot to mention it."

Grateful for the lighter topic of discussion Ed shoved down the brewing anger and got to his feet to make his way to the kitchen, "I doubt you forgot, maybe you just think I can't cook."

"I do worry about my house being burnt down with you here," the man said with a bit of teasing in his tone.

"Oh, ha ha bastard. That would be ironic though, the Flame Alchemist's house burns down one evening, authorities believe it was due to a cooking accident," he mocked in an attempted reporters' voice. The man laughed at the words which broke the darker mood momentarily. Ed scratched the back of his neck at the sound to try and cover the pleasant way he felt hearing the man actually laughing and turned to head to the living room, "Guess I'll straighten up or something since you don't trust me cooking."

"Can you even cook, last I heard you're capable of eating just about anything."

He let out his own short laugh at the words, he didn't doubt that was what both Winry and Al had told the man, "Yeah well I managed to figure out what I did and didn't like that way. I'll have you know I can cook I just don't like too."

"Oh, I think that's just a cover up, the not liking to cook line is something I've heard before."

"Oh yeah asshole, where," Ed called out as he picked up the chess board and the pieces to put them away in the wooden box that was shoved under the table hours ago when Breda and Havoc had pulled the game out. Closing the box afterward and getting up to put it on the desk he heard Mustang chuckle again and say, "From Hawkeye. She's really not that wonderful a cook, she can make food that is edible if your starving but that's about it."

Ed did laugh outright at that as he went back to the coffee table to grab the three mugs and take them to the kitchen, "Yeah, alright. I can believe that, but I really can cook and don't like to do it."

"When did you have the time to learn how to cook? Didn't Miss Pinako make you boys every meal you ate, and then Mrs. Curtis after her?"

"Yeah, and Al after both of them. What the hell do you think I did while I was in Xing? That lecherous, greedy prince sure as hell wasn't going to cook for himself let alone me. I didn't stay in the palace the whole time I was there you know."

"Hmm, I hear an interesting story brewing," Mustang commented as he set out the skillet and turned the burner on after slipping a glove from his pants pocket on one hand to ignite the burner. He'd already laid the chicken out on a cutting board on the counter next to the stove, tenderized it, according to the fork laying next to it, and tossed some seasoning on it as well.

"Yeah, well, I had to do something other than eat out all the time or eat at the palace and have to put up with that prick constantly."

"From what you said, you two got along relatively well."

"Yeah, alright, we did and we generally do get along, but that doesn't mean I can tolerate him endlessly. He gets on my damn nerves more often than anything."

Another hearty laugh, "Yes, I suppose so. Why don't you clear off the table so that we have somewhere to eat when this is finished?"

"Yeah sure," he replied easily enough and turned to do just that. This was nice, he could swear this was like that night in the coffee shop. They weren't trying to kill one another and it was a change of pace from the tenuous, high strung, argumentative way they'd spent the last few days around one another. This just reminded him that although the guy was arrogant he could be pretty good company at times as well. Feeling better about the evening even with the darker, angrier emotions still brewing below the surface Ed set to gathering up all the books, notes, papers, and pens from the table to stack them up, mark his places in each book and notebook, and then carrying them to the desk.

Dinner was rather nice and by the time they finished they actually ended up on level ground, building that comfortable atmosphere again and feeling a bit less stressed. They talked about the different foods in Xing and Ed's attempts at cooking some of the Xingnese foods he'd come across and only managing to make noodles without tearing up the kitchen. They ended up talking about the different kinds of people Ed had met and the one's Ling had tried to set Ed up with that were no where near Ed's type.

That was when the conversation changed a bit and Mustang decided to ask Ed about how he felt about Al and Winry moving to Central. Dinner was well beyond finished by then and they both ended up drinking two cups of coffee and Mustang fixed himself a glass of brandy after that to which Ed had accepted the offer for when asked.

"I don't know, it's kind of hard to work out how I feel about that with what's going on right now."

"That's reasonable. Miss Winry did seem adamant about moving to Central when I addressed some of my concerns about it."

"Concerns, like what exactly?"

The man took a swig of his drink before he answered, "Central is a very active place, more so with you having returned. I'm not saying that neither of them can handle the hustle and bustle of the city lifestyle so don't look offended," the man explained quickly to the glare Ed was sending his way. Ed took a generous drink of his glass of brandy after the words.

"Then what else did you say?"

"I merely asked if they were prepared to leave behind Resembool, Miss Pinako, and Rush Valley to move here with Anna."

"That must have gotten a heated response out of Winry," Ed commented with a laugh.

"Indeed," the man replied with a smirk, "but it was Alphonse that said they had both discussed that and planned to come to Central upon your return so they would actually get to see you every once in a while. Then of course, it was pointed out that the education opportunities here in Central were much better and that Winry's chosen profession would be a perfect addition to this city."

"Well that's those two for you, mostly Al though. Winry's a bit more spontaneous," Ed replied easily. Leave it to his younger brother to be able to come up with some good and logical arguments to counter Mustangs. Finding out that he was one of the reasons but not the entirety of the reason they wanted to move to Central was a relief. Al could go to college and do whatever he wanted and Winry could make a killing as an automail mechanic here in Central.

"What about you, do you plan on remaining in Central permanently?"

"Military Mustang, who knows? Probably though, that was my intention when I came back here. Still haven't found an apartment yet, not that I've had the time."

"Edward," Mustang began in a serious tone making him look up at the man, "you should know by now that you are more than welcome to stay with Gracia, myself, or anyone within my command or even your colleagues until you find a place of your own. There is also that if you decide to transfer elsewhere and only visit us here."

"Yeah, yeah, I know that, really. I'd just like to get a place of my own for a while once this shit that's going on now is over with."

"I would very much like to be able to get this 'shit' as you say over with soon."

"Cheers to that," Ed said with a chuckle and held up his glass. Mustang held up his own to those words and they clinked glasses before polishing them off. Then the older man got to his feet, "Well then, it's time to call it a night for me, I have work in the morning after all."

"Yeah, you go ahead, I'll clean up."

"That's not necessary," Mustang began to protest as Ed pushed himself away from the table and got to his feet. His arm was still useless and his shoulder still hurt every now and then. But this lounging around the house doing only research gave him plenty of time to heal and he was feeling better now than he had. It would take a while for his collar bone to heal completely and he had a hard time believing he had the luxury of waiting for that to happen. Without missing a beat he countered Mustang's protest even with his thoughts going, "You cooked, I'll clean. Just go on, I sit here in this house all day so it won't kill me to help out now and then."

"You really needn't go through any trouble, you're a guest in my house."

"Shut up and go to bed old man before I feed you your damn dishes," Ed said with a glare making the man sigh, run a hand through his hair, and finally, grudgingly agree. "Alright, but I don't want you to feel obligated to do anything."

"I don't feel obligated to do shit, but I'm still cleaning up and your going to bed so Hawkeye doesn't show up wanting to shoot us both because you end up late to work like she did after that first full day around one another."

"Alright, goodnight Edward and thank you for doing what isn't necessary," the man said with a smirk.

"Go the hell away already," Ed said with a glare as he gathered up all the dishes on the table and carried them to the kitchen. Between the two of them there wasn't much for left overs. He waited until he heard the man walk away to start rummaging through cabinets looking for something to store what little leftovers there were in. Finding a bowl and a lid for the plastic piece he scraped all the left over food into the bowl with the spatula that was used to stir the rice they'd eaten and put the lid on it to stick it in the fridge. After that he set to washing the dishes and when he finished wiped off the counters and stove and then the table, tossed the towel on the counter next to the sink and cut off the lights.

Making his way through the rest of the rooms throughout the house he cut off lights, checked windows, checked the front door once more then headed upstairs. Walking into his temporary room and closing the door to strip down to his boxers he climbed into bed and got comfortable. For one night he drifted into an easy sleep and would actually manage to get a full nights' rest.

_To Be Continued . . .  
_

* * *

_After Thought: Seems that's the ending theme going on, Ed falling asleep seems to be the ending of the chapter. Wow, this story just keeps getting more and more complex huh? Well I can no more control how the story goes than I can the characters involved. There's bound to be a real cliffhanger sometime as the story progresses, and if these two can get over whatever is running through their heads that stops them from acting on their attraction towards each other maybe that Eventual Roy/Ed will show up. Thank for reading, see ya' next time._


	15. Chapter Thirteen

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**  
**Pairing: Roy/Ed Genre: Drama, Action Adventure Spoilers: Up until the current chapter of the manga. (Ch 99)**  
**Series: FMA Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**  
**Status: Work In Progress Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? Roy/Ed**

**_Love isn't simple, isn't easy, and sure isn't like a fairy tale . . ._**

**Chapter 13**

When Mustang woke the following morning it was not to a peaceful house. Indeed, he was awoken at such an ungodly hour by the very loud and even angry shout of Edward just down the hall. Too tired to manage to decipher an articulate noise from his house quest he would have just gone back to sleep if not for what was currently circling around them like an awaiting Tsunami. Adrenaline was the only thing that pulled him from his comfortable bed as he reached for his gloves, slipped them on, ignored decency to bother with a house coat to give him some amount of cover as he made his way hastely out of his room in only his boxers and gloves.

Slamming the door to the guest room open with both hands poised to snap Mustang found that he woken for nothing other than Prince Ling of Xinghan presently in Ed's room. He was about to turn to leave when his mind screeched to a halt at the uninvited guest, what was the Prince doing here, in his home, and how did he get past the men stationed outside?

"Ling get the hell out," Ed growled menacingly at the other young man who had an easy grin on his face, as per usual. Mustang stood in the doorway a few moments looking both of them over. It looked as though Edward was rather flustered, it was a good look on him he thought with a smirk, and Ling have moved a good distance away after the owner of the very home he had broken into had barged into the room. While he would love nothing more than to continue admiring a flustered Ed in only boxers and with his hair down and ruffled in a delightful way he cleared his throat to announce his presence to his invited house guest.

"Would you care to tell me what is going on?"

"This bastard snuck into my room and molested me is what. Could have at least grabbed a robe Mustang," Ed said with a smirk.

The older man was pleased at the teasing note in the younger alchemist's voice and also the jealous glare being sent his way from the prince. He heard the footsteps of a familiar soldier running through the living room and up the stairs. Turning to address them Mustang wasn't surprised to see that it was Diane from Ed's group, "False alarm, just an uninvited prince from Xinghan."

"Oh, well from my standpoint it looks like an orgy or something."

"Thanks Diane, I really wanted that image in my head."

"I don't know if I could imagine such an older man participating, however in my country it does occur on a regular basis," Ling commented offhandedly. Mustang glanced at Ed who flushed at the others' words while Diane chuckled. Mustang was walking back towards his room to at least get dressed, he knew it would be pointless and impossible to sleep now that he was awake so the least he could do was make himself presentable. He easily tuned out any further arguments from the two he left in Edward's temporary room as Diane headed back outside to alert the others that there was no cause for alarm.

After taking a shower and changing into clean boxers, clean uniform pants, and a white undershirt since he had a few hours to kill before going in for work he made his way downstairs. Ed was making a pot of coffee while Ling took it upon himself to walk around the living room glancing at all the books on the coffee table curiously. Mustang offered a nod of greeting before he made his way to the kitchen where Ed wordlessly handed him a full mug of coffee. Taking a sip he was pleased that it was made the way he liked his coffee, strong, black, with just a teaspoon of sugar to lessen the bitterness just enough.

"So, to what do we owe the pleasure of his excellence's presence at four in the morning?"

"I was merely in the country, I had put in a request for an audience with Edward but never received a reply."

"That's because I've been busy. What the hell do you really want?"

"Why I wished to see my dear friend once more of course."

"You're the Emperor now, you're not supposed to just up and leave your country to visit a friend."

"Hmm, is that so? Well as the Emperor I believe that I am free to do as I please."

Mustang sat and listened in silence as the two went back and forth finding it a bit entertaining. Ed was certainly right about one thing, Emperor or Prince, Ling seemed to be the same as usual. What he found most endearing were similarities between this younger raven and himself, avoidance of direct questions, testing the limits of Ed's temper, and of course, the amusement. Other than that he couldn't really see much they had in common. If not for the fact that he knew through Ed that things had not worked out between the two and that the younger did not want that sort of relationship with his ex-lover he might be jealous.

"The hell you are, what if everyone starts a revolt or something while you're gone?"

"Nonsense, they have foreseen the destruction of violence many times before. Especially so while you were in my country."

"Shut the hell up, I was apprehending threats-"

"Yes you were. However, it would have been much nicer of you to have kept to some sense of decorum."

"Fuck that, you do whatever it takes to catch the bad guy, that's how it goes."

"If that is what you believe. Now then, what have you learned?"

"What the hell-I knew you had a hidden agenda you smarmy, conniving, bastard."

"Perhaps I can offer some assistance, after all, it is not everyday an Emperor offers to help a-"

"Finish that sentence and you'll be eating automail for breakfast," Ed snarled.

Ling merely grinned at him innocently then made his way to the table and sat down, "Perhaps, you would be so kind as to offer your guest a drink."

"Ain't my house nor yours, get it your damn self you lazy shithead."

"Such language, my followers were always appalled at your crude language."

"They can shove it, and you can go to hell."

"What would you like to drink your excellency," Mustang asked politely though he really would rather the younger man had shown up at a more decent hour. It wouldn't be a good idea to be rude to the Emperor of Xing on any day regardless of the fact that this young man had broken into his house, harassment Edward in the middle of the night, and robed them both of precious hours of sleep.

"I would prefer tea, if its' no trouble. I sincerely apologize for waking you General."

"Yes, perhaps you could chose a more convenient time the next time you wish to visit Edward should he be here."

"Ah, of course."

While the older man stood to go back to his kitchen and make some fresh tea for the new guest he couldn't help but wonder why Ed seemed testier than usual. Three years ago the young man had seemed calm, subdued, even distant and a bit cold towards everyone. Lately it was like a switch flipped on an off. At times he could be calm and collected, at others he reverted back to his defensive, angry, suspicious self. At this moment he was back to the angry, cussing, defensive self, but it was different from what he had spent the last few weeks on the receiving end of. Now it was almost as though he was missing a piece of himself and with the arrival of Ling that piece was put back but something else had fallen away from the picture.

He couldn't exactly figure out what it was but he would, once he was more awake and alert enough to think on it. Perhaps he could spend the next few hours watching the two interact and being a host to the new guest in his home. He wasn't expected at work until eight, which happened to be a little over three hours from now. Today was going to be a long day, he thought to himself as he ran a hand through his hair. Rather than contemplating about Ed, which he did regularly enough already, he should perhaps let his mind go over what he knew of this insanity they were dealing with.

"So then, you're already living in the same house, you are quite a quick worker Edo."

"Go to hell, what the fuck did you just call me?"

Ah, of course, he did recall how absolutely civil Edward could be. At least, he thought with a smirk while waiting for the kettle he had to whistle, he was not the only one on the receiving end of the volatile attitude Edward had. Maybe it would be best to dwell on everything when he reached the office.

"Ah, but my-"

"My nothing, I ain't your anything you leeching jackass. What the hell are you really here for?"

"Well now, how uncourteous of you. Here I am, an Emperor, who has crossed a treacherous dessert, to visit a valued friend."

"Stop trying the change the subject and answer the question," Ed snarled at the other while Mustang fixed said guest a glass of tea now that the water was ready. He found his small container of sugar and had to refill it because of Ed drinking his sugar with coffee instead of the other way around and set that on the table. He took a seat in his usual spot, which Ed had until just this morning taken over, at the end of the table closest to the kitchen. Now the two were sitting across from each other and Ed had his arms crossed in a defensive posture he knew all too well from past experience.

"Hmm, indeed, you are the persistent one. However, I will only tell you my real reason for being here if you will answer a question I have for you."

"What, you can show up in someone's house in the middle of the night, molest me, and then deny answer my question and make conditions to whether you will give an honest answer."

"Indeed I can, we have often played this game-"

"What game, this isn't a game you asshole."

"No, but that was an interesting game," Ling declared straight faced. Mustang smirked and took a quick drink of his coffee when Ed looked his way to glower at him. The older man looked at Ed's figure to avoid meeting that glare sure he wouldn't be able to say anything if he didn't. Ed had at least thrown on a pair of pants and black muscle T-shirt. Without the long sleeves and gloves Mustang was able to see the scars hidden beneath such fabric and a bit perplexed that Ed didn't seem to mind that his scars were visible at the moment. He noticed every mark from burns, cuts, older wounds he could tell from the texture even from where he stood were grazes from bullets and a few of the marks left behind by a whip. It fueled his temper to see how much torment the younger man had endured and that was just visible on his bare arms and hands so he kept silent for a while to try to reign in his temper.

"Just ask your fucking question already you prick," Ed snapped as he looked back to the young Emperor.

"How are you really doing Edward?"

"What, that's your question? I'm fine, peachy with a healing gunshot wound and a broken collar bone, a hole in my back, and a psycho bitch that supposedly lived centuries ago after me. Just fine, thanks for asking."

"Well very good then, glad to hear you are fine," Ling replied with a smile. Ed looked like he wanted to leap across the table and strangle the other but Mustang cleared his throat in an attempt to stop such a reaction. Ed glared, growled, then sighed and said through gritted teeth, "Now answer my question."

"Yes, of course. I am here because I wished to visit you, that is the honest truth. Perhaps my bringing Princess Mai here to assist with your healing process is a bonus."

"How the hell-"

"Your General friend in the North alerted me to your current status."

"Armstrong? Why the hell would she-"

"She is the one in charge of logistics, legalities, and also any alliances we have with other countries," Mustang replied easily.

"Yes, as as the Emperor of an allied nation of Amestrius, I conceded to aid in any way that I can as long as I am kept updated on you."

"What the hell you obsessed-"

"No, not obsessed, concerned. As you left my country relatively uneasy I was concerned as to how you were doing," the young Xingnese man took a generous drink of his now warm tea and nodded his thanks to the older man. Mustang nodded in return and then got to his feet, "Perhaps if the young princess is available she can offer her services soon. I believe Edward would appreciate being able to at least return to the office as to not remain quarantined with this house."

"Which is a fine house-ow-was that really necessary Edward?"

"Yes you git. Stop brown nosing."

"I do not do such a thing unless within your-"

"Shut the hell up," Ed stammered with a blush and from the grimace on the other young man's face delivered another kick to his friend. Mustang made to get up to try and figure out what he could make for breakfast when Ling turned back to him to say, "If you are willing to house two other guests for a short time I am sure Princess Mai would be glad to offer her assistance to Edward."

"Ah, of course, she should be available presently as she and Lan Fan are together," at those words the young Xingnese raised his hand as if in a wave. Ed looked around after the motion and Mustang followed suit, sure enough when they both heard footsteps from upstairs two figures began to descend the stairs. Mustang was surprised by their appearances as they came into view, while Ran Fan had indeed grown both in wisdom and in years it was the young princess who looked much different. Now standing nearly as tall as her companion she had indeed began the growth into a young woman. She still wore the pink, purples, and whites from the last time he had seen the young girl but her hair was longer, while still in the same style, and her figure more defined and mature.

"Stop staring pervert, she's only sixteen," Ed muttered to which the older alchemist blinked and nodded to the two young women in greeting.

"It's a pleasure to have you both here, despite the earliness of your arrival."

"Surely Alphonse conveyed a message of my arrival General," Mai said, her voice having changed into a deeper tone from the years that had gone by, yet still very feminine in its tone she even moved with the same grace as that of her two companions.

"I'm afraid it must have slipped his mind."

"I heard something was going on with Edward so perhaps it can be forgiven, my apologies for arriving without prior announcement."

"The young lord was feeling rather impatient waiting until a decent hour to make his appearance known," Lan Fan said with a glare directed at the aforementioned person. Ling only offered an image of a sheepish grin to which Ed snorted before he let out a squawk and flinched. Raising his hand and shaking violently Mustang saw what the reaction was for, it seemed Mai's pet had come along with them as well. Ed finally managed to free his hand and the small animal clambered across the table to leap onto its owners' shoulder.

"I see the fur ball came as well," Ed muttered darkly making the older man chuckle at his expense and receive a dark glare for his trouble. Mustang stood once more and made his way to the kitchen, "Perhaps you ladies would like something to drink?"

"Yes please, tea preferably," Mai replied as she took a seat at the table next to Edward. Again the man whose house was now full of people stood silently in the kitchen listening to the words that were spoken. At least, with these quests here he could begin to gather information about some of the time Ed had spent in Xing and perhaps figure out how they had managed to help Ed put the pieces of himself back together again.

"So, what are the extent of your injuries?"

"Broken collar bone, fucked up shoulder, nearly chewed off finger, and a wound to the back."

"Hmm, painful but not unfix-able," the young alkestrist replied before declaring, "well get rid of that shirt so I can look at your wounds properly."

Mustang wanted to laugh at the indignant scoff that came from his invited house guest at those words but held the sound in. Opening the fridge he decided on finding something suitable for breakfast like he had thought about doing earlier instead of watching the exchange in his dining room. He allowed himself a smirk at the young woman's next words.

"Acting embarrassed, as I recall you were not so embarrassed around the Emperor and his guard, nor myself the first time I had to heal some of your more serious wounds."

"Yeah that's different, besides . . . wait, when did you heal any of my serious wounds?"

"Mai was the one who healed you after your return from that country, I was certain you knew of this."

"No, I didn't, tell me you didn't travel all the way from Xing just for that?"

"I did not, but I very well would have, as I have done in this situation. While you are as much of a brat as you always were, you mean the world to Alphonse and he means the world to me. Be grateful and do not be difficult with me."

"Perhaps," Lan Fan began, "Edward would enjoy some amount of privacy given the company."

Mustang grimaced at those words and decided a simple egg omelet breakfast would have to do, he didn't have all that much else to make for so many. He knew what the young warrior was suggesting was the problem, Ed was ashamed of the scars he had and did not want him to see the evidence of what he had endured. While that bothered him it was more the fact that the young man still did not seem to trust him enough to allow him to see even a part of the truth of what had happened to him. It could possibly be that Ed had not really moved on, which he knew was factual, and still felt ashamed and insecure, that was it, it had to be the real reason.

As soon as he thought of someone like Ed, who had enough pride, arrogance, attitude, and the strength to back all of that up, feeling insecure and ashamed he was able to connect the dots. It was not a matter of trust, it was a matter of opinion, he feared that everyone would think less of him or label him as weak if they knew what he'd endured. No sane person could go through such things unaffected, unmarred, and unchanged. Whatever he had gone through had ground out what little bit of self esteem Ed had and while some of it was built back up once more that wound still remained, gaping and bleeding. 'Once you hear something enough times you start to believe and you start to set yourself up to fulfilling it,' his mother had told him several times but with positive intentions after he'd told her about his plans to become the Fuhrer.

He was such a fool, here everyone was expressing concern for the young man and all their actions were really warranting were defensive anger shielding shame and a feeling of low self worth. They could compliment him and tell him how strong, incredible, and frighteningly intelligent he was for the last of their days, but to Ed it had not become a compliment but further proof that how he had to behave in order to survive as long as he did in Rousia was weak, stupid, and shameful. Going through the motion of getting everything out and ready to cook Mustang contemplated on his findings from his change in view as Edward was led out of the room and upstairs by Mai.

Upstairs Ed led the way into his temporary room with Mai following behind him and sat down on the bed when she looked at it pointedly. She came to stand in front of him with her hands on her hips and an expectant look on her face which meant she wanted him to follow her earlier directions from downstairs so he removed his shirt with a bit of trouble given his injuries.

"Stay still and try not to fidget," she said as she moved around him to examine the wound on his back that she had mentioned. She let out a sigh and said, "You're going to have to sit on the floor for this one so I can draw the circle needed," she explained to which he did as he was told. Once on the floor she knelt down behind him and in one quick succession of movements he felt the familiar warmth of alchemical energy at his back where his wound was located. In the next the only thing he felt was a soreness instead of the throbbing pain he had preferred to ignore from before.

She moved to kneel down on the floor beside him where she expertly drew a circle on the wooden floor with a piece of chalk she still had in her hand from the previous circle she had drawn. Embedding the knives from before into the five points of the star drawn on the floor he felt that same energy reach through him to heal his shoulder and further reach to heal his collar bone immediately alleviating the pain the injury caused every time he took in breath or exhaled. With a relieved sigh he turned so that he could lean back against the bed.

"Thanks Mai, that's a thousand times better."

"You're welcome, now then, we need to talk."

"About what," he said opening his eyes which he had closed in momentary bliss. Talking seemed to be the most active thing he was expected to engage in with everyone as of late. She crossed her legs to get comfortable on the floor in front of him and raised an eyebrow, "I'm more than certain of your intelligence, what do you believe I wish to discuss?"

"Well hell, there's a number of things . . . the psycho bitch, the time I wasn't anywhere to be found, the recent events, pick one."

"Hmm, those are indeed pressing matters," she commented offhandedly as though those topics were not the ones she wished to discuss. She let out a sigh of her own, "I actually wish to discuss Mustang-san with you, as I recall the reason you had for not engaging in a true relationship with Ling-sempai was simply because you wished to have such relations with Mustang-san. What have you done to engage in this relationship?"

"Don't call that jackass sempai it sounds weird," he commented shifting at the loaded question she was asking him. Why should he have this kind of discussion with a sixteen year old anyway? Sure every now and then he had complained about multiple things when in her presence but that didn't mean he wanted to have these kinds of talks with the younger woman.

"You are more than aware that maturity is expected at a young age in my country so don't look as though you don't know how to approach the subject."

"Yeah, I also know you're an obstinate brat," he ended up getting kicked in the leg for that. He shrugged, "I don't know, it keeps shifting between us I guess."

"Shifting, how so," she asked.

"Well at some points we get along pretty well, we don't want to rip each others heads off and can have decent enough conversations. I'd even say the bastard is actually a human being at those moments. But during others we rip each others throats off and have really heated arguments, not that I didn't expect that but it sets us back."

"Perhaps the two of you need to address the true depth of your feelings for one another in order to alleviate the tension and confusion between you," she offered. He shrugged to that as well, that might work but they didn't really have the time to deal with whatever the hell was developing between them if anything was. He knew there was tension but he couldn't figure out if it was frustration or something else entirely and he wasn't about to ask in order to figure it out.

"If you are concerned about whether the feelings you have are mutual then you shouldn't," she said suddenly.

Her words startled him and caught him off guard so he was unable to respond for a moment before he managed, "W-what are you-"

"It is very clear to everyone with the ability to see that both of you are driving the other crazy because you are attracted to one another. I would even wager that the General-san's feelings mirror your own in intensity. You can never gain anything without first giving something-"

"Of equal value in return, yeah I know. So, I should take the risk of this blowing up in my face because at least I will know what it is like huh?"

"When you're in love there are only two ways that you can deal with such feelings. One is that you have to accept the other does not feel the same way, though this is not the case in your situation, and move on. The only other option left is to be with that person you are in love with and try to make it work. Regardless of whether it works out between you two or not I am certain that both of you will never lose those feelings for each other."

"Great, thanks, that's reassuring," he said sarcastically. She got to her feet and watched him a moment before she said, "As for all the other matters going on, do not think that just because a great deal is going on that you should not reach for and take the risk of obtaining a bit of happiness and enjoyment for yourself. You have suffered a great deal Edward-san and I honestly believe that you are more than deserving of a moment's peace."

He chuckled in agreement with her and she made her way to the door and turned to say, "Get some sleep so that your wounds can heal all the way. Alkestry does heal them but your body must accept the change."

"Yeah, yeah, I remember that much. Thanks again and keep that leech away from me would you?"

She laughed and nodded then closed the door behind him leaving him to his thoughts. She had said a lot of things that were obvious and made a lot of sense to him. How in the hell had she known what she . . . right, Mai happened to be in love with his little brother who was married to their childhood friend and had a family to take care of now. Damn that had to be rough on her but she still wished to be friends with the two of them even though it had to hurt to see Al with Winry when she was still very much in love with the younger. Getting up off the ground he climbed up onto his bed and lay down on his side and closed his eyes.

The next morning resulted in Mai waiting downstairs for Mustang with a fresh cup of coffee brewing and having made rice and eggs to go with the diced breakfast sausage she had mixed in with the rice. It was not her typical breakfast but it seemed like a good idea to her since the other preferred the Amestrian cuisine over Xingnese. He greeted her and offered thanks for the food and the coffee which he drank two cups of before he sat down at the table to eat. She drank her tea and continued to wait patiently for him to finish his meal.

Ling was currently waiting for Ed to finish upstairs getting ready for work so that he could talk with the other. She worried that Ling would end up fighting with the young alchemist but hopefully this conversation would go well and she could see to it that nothing too serious resulted in the conversation the young Emperor had decided he would have with the young alchemist. The general returned to the table after carrying his dishes to be place in the sink and took a drink of his fresh cup of coffee before he looked to her, "What is on your mind young lady?"

"A great deal, but my question to you is, how are you and Edward-san getting along?'

A raised eyebrow met her inquiry, "Why, may I ask, are concerned about such a thing?"

"Edward-san is my friend, I am concerned because you are important to him," she countered.

"I am merely his commanding officer, I like to think he would consider me a friend as well."

"That is very ignorant of you," she replied easily taking a drink of her tea again to give him time to comply a reply.

He looked affronted by her words as he said, "Excuse me, but-"

"My apologies form my bluntness General-san, but you are foolish to believe that is all to your relationship with Edward-san."

He fell silent long enough to take a sip of his coffee then replied, "There should be nothing more between us for many reasons young Mai-san."

"Do not speak down to me as though I am a child," she continued before he could reply to her words, "what reason's could there be that are not within reason for the two of you?"

"With all respect, I do not wish to divulge the reasons," he replied easily enough.

Glaring at the older man she set her drink down on the table roughly and nearly rose from her seat but managed with clenched fists to remain seated. "With all due respect General-san, you are a man of many secrets. Edward-san has taken many risks and holds many secrets. Are you truly only concerned about the risks and not the judgement of others?"

Now he really did look insulted and replied with some ire in his voice and a hard expression on his face, "I am not concerned about what others think."

"Good," she said a little more calm now that she had cleared that up, "then there is no reason to fight what comes naturally and has always been present."

"Always is an overstatement with this development and now is not the best time for such a relationship to begin."

This man was stubborn in his resolve, whatever reasons he had conjured up in his mind he seemed reluctant to let go of. In reply she took a deep breath and said, "Hear me out, I may not have always been present but I listen and observe. In the past it was you who provided Edward-san with a goal when he was certain he could never be forgiven or undo the tragedy he had wrought. Following that was a Commanding officer and subordinate that was purely professional."

He conceded to that with a nod and a comment of, "Insubordinate, rebellious, and foul mouthed subordinate but yes remotely professional."

She nodded as well with a smirk on her face at hearing the amusement and even hint of fondness in the older man's voice, "Yes. With time that grew into camaraderie and a shaky friendship developed, as trust began to grow between you he disappeared."

The older man winced at the reminded which she knew to signal that he blamed himself a great deal for Edward's disappearance, something she was more than certain Edward would not be happy to see should he find out the older man placed the blame on himself. He cleared his throat to shove his emotional reaction to her words back, "Indeed. That was not the most thrilling of times for me or anyone else. Edward went through more than any of us could begin to imagine."

"That is very true, I have heard that you were not the most patient of people when Edward-san first returned."

He gave a slight nod that seemed to be full of embarrassment and disappointment in himself for that but did not disagree with the truth of her words. He took another drink of his coffee then, "Regretfully so, whatever friendship we may have had will be lost due to my foolishness rather than anything else."

She sighed, she knew that to be untrue from her conversation with Edward just last night, "In time he may feel that trust is still present, but it will take time," she agreed at the end, it was not her place to relay the words that Edward had said to the other. That was a matter the two of them would have to deal with together.

"I have realized as much, late as it was," he replied to her words.

"Then, of course, as observant as I am I feel I should inform you of why I believe you a fool."

"I thought you had already made yourself clear young lady," he commented allowing her to see that he was not one to take constructive criticism very well though he tried to hide as much in his expression and mannerisms.

"Edward-san is defensive towards you because he fears your rejecting him," she was cutting it extremely close to what Edward had told her but someone had to set these two straight or they would remain in this stale mate they had forced one another into; "He believes himself undesirable because of what he was subjected to. Such insecurities are well hidden by his anger and false bravado if one only took the time to truly look."

The general paused at her words to truly take in what she said but gave another of his short nods of acceptance as though she had confirmed a suspicion he had previously had. "Yes I have noticed. However, getting beneath the surface and earning his trust is easier said than done."

"That is very true, perhaps truly talking to him will be of some help," she commented.

"If he is willing to do so," he replied with practice of ease and finished his coffee then made to get up from his seat.

"Not trying will never provide the answer," she ended before rising from her seat to bow deeply to him, "I must take my leave General-san, I am terribly tired."

He bowed his head respectfully to her, "Of course, feel free to take the empty guest room upstairs."

With a sweet and grateful smile she bid him goodnight and wished him a good day before turning and heading up the stairs to the aforementioned guest room. Ran-fan was already in the guest room no doubt listening in on the conversation between her Emperor and Edward. Knowing she would be too curious to ignore such an exchange of words she was silent in entering the room and sat upon the bed to watch the warrior.

In the other room Ed was sitting on his bed after Ling refused to let him walk out of the room. To be greeted by the lecherous Emperor after having gotten dressed to go to work, not something he looked forward to but was grateful to do nonetheless after being locked up in this house all this time did not make his morning any easier to deal with. What was worse was that he was being denied his coffee because of the other which made him want to beat the guy's face in.

"You came here to visit did you?"

"Why of course, you should feel honored I was willing to travel across such a tremendously-"

"Shut up, I heard you're sob story already. You wasted your time because unless you can be of any damn help to this crap going on I'd rather you go home."

"Ah," the other replied, "always so full of humor dearest Edward," he glared at the other at his words but of course the Xingnese Emperor carried on despite his heated glare to say, "As I gathered from your friends you have not been so delightful since your return."

"Yeah, a did I mention the crap going on," he replied sarcastically and crossed his arms over his chest to continue glaring daggers at the other.

"Before that, I hope it has nothing to do with my actions or our bitter parting of ways."

He scoffed, "Don't be so arrogant you pompous Emperor. I'm pissed you pulled your 'Almighty Emperor' card to deal with what was MY problem but my bad mood is not entirely because of you."

"Then please do elaborate on the grievances you have. I would hope you think of me as a friend at the very least," the other replied with a calm smile on his face that Ed could see through to notice the apprehension. Why the hell did everyone think he would just dump them or end his friendship with them because they were idiots? He knew that they made stupid mistakes and decisions prior to becoming friends with them for fuck's sake.

"I do you asshole and I know that."

"Then why so defensive," Ling asked truly curious about the answer.

He scoffed and turned his head away to look out the window and avoid Ling's gaze but the other just moved into his line of sight making him growl. When he leaned back to put some space between them the dark haired young man merely leaned forward so that their noses nearly touched. He leaned back uncrossing his arms to use them to keep himself sitting up and growling threateningly, "Get the hell out of my space you perverted shit," to which he was rewarded with that trademark lecherous grin. Ling didn't back away he merely knelt down on the bed to which Ed really did draw back and punch him to get him to back away.

Ling wiped away the blood from his busted lip and at least that grin was off his face, "My, I didn't realize you were that repulsed by my presence."

"Shut the fuck up you asshole, why the fuck do you have to get in my damn space?"

"To get your attention, you still have not answered my question. Why are you so defensive?"

"I, shut up."

"Answer the question."

"Got to hell."

"Now Edward, it would be much easier if you would stop avoiding the question."

"You didn't answer mine you hypocrite," he snapped back with a glare.

"I managed to get your attention that was my reason."

"Well I-damn you to hell."

"I'm afraid we have already been through that place and I have no plans to return anytime soon."

"That was a false gate."

"Similar according to folklore."

"Whatever."

"Edward," the other said seriously, "I do not lie so I would appreciate you answering my questions honestly."

"You lie all the damn time."

"No I do not," the other said sounding offended, "I merely chose my words so as to not be so direct."

"The memories from that place have been coming back and it's fucking with me. I don't want them on top of everything else so that's the reason for my defensiveness."

"Hmm," the other sat down on the floor crossing his legs and arms and watching him before replying, "Ah, you wish to no longer remember such violence but everywhere you turn you are unable to escape such memories then?"

"Sort of, yeah," he conceded.

"What I think would be of some help is for you to take a moment that can capture your full attention to get a blessed and needed time of relief. Sex is a great tool for that."

Ed blushed at the last of the others words and stood up to say, "Fucking hell, can't you ever think about something other than that?"

Ling got to his feet with a smirk planted on his face, "Of course I do, I care a great deal about what my next meal will be. However it is hard to think about much else while in your presence."

Ed narrowed his eyes at the other and backed away when Ling advanced towards him, he shoved the other in the chest when he found himself guided back until his back hit the wall by the door. He held his hand out to keep the other back, "You and I are strictly friends, no benefits whatsoever for you."

"But I am Emperor," the other replied with a sly smile.

"And I will kick you ass so stay the fuck back," he said with another shove forcing the other back a step.

"If you will not have me then perhaps your Flame General will provide you with the distraction you need."

"Yeah, right, if he'd ever want to. Besides, he would want to stay focused or some shit anyway."

"Amestrians," Ling began finally backing away making him relax a little bit, "always so tense. Some moments in life are worth every risk. Also, a person of either gender would have to be blind and deaf not to want something as breath-taking as yourself."

Ed glared, that smooth talking idiot, "Some 'thing', 'breath-taking', nice choice of endearments jackass. I am not a 'thing' nor suffocating. Thanks for the talk now get the hell out of my room."

"Ah, but you are as gold, I only meant to compliment you Edward-san."

He flushed at the close proximity of the other once again and then shoved him back once more so that the young Emperor landed on his ass so that he could glare at him heatedly, "Out, out of my room, you've spent enough of your 'precious' time pestering me."

"But Edo my-"

"Say another word and I'll make you choke on your own pony-tail," he growled vehemently. He grabbed the other by his collar tossed him out of his room and promptly slammed the door. When Mustang knocked on his door and announced himself he almost ignored him but the smell of coffee and the words that he had a cup of fresh coffee for their ride to work managed to convince him out of the borrowed room and even out the front door. Ling nor Mai were nowhere in sight for once for which he was grateful.

TBC . . .


	16. Chapter Fourteen

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA the cow does, bow to the cow she is all-powerful. FMA is the property of Arakawa-sama and not I. I make no money writing this I am merely borrowing the characters for creative purposes.**

_A/N: This story is a challenge I set for myself to have fun, test PoV's, and come up with something new. I'm terribly sorry for the delay, my laptop crashed and I had to go with the good old pen and paper method. I did not lose my files (thankfully, I backed all of them up) but my internet access is scarce at best presently. Here is the double entry to make up for the unfortunate circumstance. _

**Title: Carpe Diem (Seize the Day)**

**Pairing: Roy/Ed**

**Genre: Drama, Action Adventure**

**Series: FMA**

**Rating: MA, NC-17 (overall)**

**Status: Work In Progress**

**Summary: Who knew he could have a chance at this, that he could actually achieve happiness? **

_**Cold Fire**_

_Nowhere can a secret keep_

_Always secret, dark and deep,_

_Half so well as in the past,_

_Buried deep to last, to last._

© Dean Koontz

**Chapter 14**

_The Following Afternoon_

"Sir, is something bothering you?"

Mustang looked up at his co-worker; Hawkeye was of course using their lunch outside the office to question him. He had expected as such and answered her without too long of a pause so that she could not read through his masks as she was known to be capable of doing from their long friendship and years of working together, "Ah, no, just thinking."

She raised an eyebrow, "Would you care to share what is on your mind?"

"Uh-of course," he said caving in to her gaze knowing it was pointless to try to talk his way out of this conversation after she had gone through all this trouble to corner him into it. "I must apologize for allowing my thoughts to fall off course of what they should be focused on," he offered to try to console her before she became angry that he was not answering her inquiry more precisely.

"Forgiven," she replied easily with a calm expression, "now then, do carry on sir."

He smirked as she took a healthy drink of her water, "Miss Mai and I had a conversation just yesterday morning that has me rethinking some of my reasons . . ."

"As you should sir," she replied when he did not finish what it was he was saying.

He raised an eyebrow at her, "Oh, why do you believe so?"

"Permission to speak freely sir," she asked out of habit.

"Granted, we're not at the office Riza," he replied with a slight smile to which she offered a small smile in return.

"Your reasons mean nothing in the face of a relationship with Edward as the two of you are more than capable of making your reasons inconsequential."

He didn't have anything to say at first so settled with, "You really believe that?"

She gave him a look that said he was being an idiot, he was getting that a lot lately actually and it was not great to be on the receiving end of such from those who were supposed to be his friends. She paused when their lunch arrived to take a bite out of her grilled chicken salad, she always did prefer a healthy diet to the greasy fatty foods he watched Ed gorge himself on and found amusing.

"Yes, I have told you as much before, your next move will be more difficult however."

"Next move," he questioned then took a bite of his Alfredo chicken, they were on a time limit so it would be a good idea to actually eat their lunch and continue their conversation. After a few more bites of his lunch, he continued with what he was going to say, "There should be mutual attraction for there to be a next move for one. Other than that I also was able to observe Edward and our sudden guests over the last couple of days and have begun to place the missing pieces."

"Which is what exactly?"

"Edward is more complex than I would like to admit," He explained as she continued eating her lunch, "Miss Mai further proved my suspicions and theories . . . We have all seemed to forget what lies beneath his anger and bravado."

"Sir," she began after she finished what she was chewing on and continued after taking a drink of her water, "I hope you don't believe him a child any longer."

"Hardly," he replied very easily, "I am merely suggesting that it is easier to believe his defensiveness is due to not wishing to disclose information, that is the case but for an underlining reason I have been blind to all this time."

She looked at him questioningly and continued with her lunch for a bit before the silence made her speak up as he continued his lunch, "Do explain Roy, I believe I am beginning to see where you are headed."

"We have in the past, held prisoners of war, and had soldiers who were. They withstood a great deal and changed as a result. My mother often told me that if something is said enough times it begins to become true or one sets themselves up to believing it."

"Oh," she began a bit shocked by his words, they ate in silence for a while mostly finishing their lunch before she continued, "Does Edward believe . . . I see, he had to become different in order to survive . . ."

He nodded sadly, "Yes, as anyone would. Instincts took over and Edward was not who we are used to. He must be feeling ashamed and as though we would judge him."

"How do we go about proving him wrong in his assumptions?"

He paused for a moment to finish his drink, which their server was quick about refilling for both of them, and then said, "That is where I am at a loss. Words do not seem to reach him, actions will end in violence, and anything else is not something he would willingly accept."

"As I recall sir," she said pausing to thank the waitress when she returned with their drinks, "he was the one to ask you for coffee that singular time you two were relatively civil around one another correct?"

He nodded and took a drink of his tea, "Indeed."

"Perhaps," she said with a hypothetical tone to her voice, "you should be the one to ask the same of him, discreet, but I'm certain Edward may appreciate a sign that you're interested."

"My interest?"

She sighed and gave him that look that said he was being ignorant once again, "I am no more blind than you, perhaps less so in this situation. This attraction is mutual as was made obvious to everyone upon Edward's return and Emperor Ling's visit."

"What is obvious," he asked as to make her elaborate but was only met with a glare that could have been as lethal as a bullet to his head.

"Grow up Roy; the sexual tension is suffocating at best."

Her very blunt choice of words made him choke on his drink that he barely managed to swallow with a bit of pain added to the struggle of it.

"Another drink sir," she asked with a smirk.

"No thank you," he said with a glare at his long time friend.

When he finally made it home from work later that evening it was to be greeted by Edward growling as he slammed a report closed where he was sitting at the dining room table. When he closed and locked the door the young man looked his way and got to his feet stretching his arms over his head to release some of the tension from his sore muscle. Ed usually did make it out of the office before he did since he could do a great deal of his work from home. He removed his jacket and shoes and made his way into the dining room.

"Still nothing on where that psycho bitch is," Ed asked, a question he always asked, everyday, since this fiasco had begun.

In addition, Mustang replied with the same answer he always gave, "We will locate her eventually."

A scoff, also expected followed by a rant, "Yeah, with incompetent law enforcement, her 'magic' bullshit, and these dead end leads to nowhere from no one we'll find her. Fucking hell we will," Ed's voice rose in volume and the level of frustration but he cut himself short to run his hand through his bangs that made him wince for some reason.

"Are you alright?"

"I seriously hate that question," Ed replied dryly.

"I was speaking of physically," he admonished.

"Oh, yeah. Phantom pains, lasts a few days after healing," Ed explained, "Well, except with automail, those are permanent."

"Are they constant," he asked truly curious and surprised Ed wasn't cutting him into pieces with sarcastic words.

"No," the other shook his head, "but they come and go," he finished with a shrug. Mustang made his way into the kitchen to figure out what they could have for dinner only to find he still had not gone grocery shopping yet so there was not much to cook.

"How often are the phantom pains," he asked to try and get Ed to elaborate so that he would know for future reference.

"Mostly in the winter and when it rains, sometimes when it's too hot outside it's impossible to stay cool with the automail getting so hot. Al was always such a mother hen when the weather was bad, he kept insisting that I stop pushing myself so hard."

Nodding at the explanation and realizing that it made sense, he also came to realize that he really was a bastard for those days of pushing Ed so hard during those weather challenged times. He happened to agree with Al on most cases when it came to a concern about Edward's health. Even to this day, the elder of the Elric's had a tendency to ignore his own injuries in favor of worrying about everyone else. While that was an admirable quality, it was aggravating and worrying all the same. He would have to keep a better eye on the younger man in place of Al's ever watchful and knowing gaze.

"Get that look off your face," Ed snapped making him look over at the other who was standing in the kitchen and right next to him actually. "I never told you so you can't feel guilty about it now," the other continued reading his thoughts right off the surface of his mind. He nodded and turned to lean back against the counter to argue, "I should have known better or asked or-"

"Shut up asshole, I needed you to push me back then so I never said anything," Ed argued.

"Surely the automail was what caused you to get sick . . ."

"That and my being an idiot. It's not an issue anymore-"

He grabbed Edward's arm to turn him towards him so that he could look him in the eyes and say sternly, "You will inform me if you don't feel well from now on."

Ed glared at him but didn't pull away, "Oh, is that an order General shithead?"

"Yes," he continued with a warning tone that offered no argument, "Because I, and many others care about your well being. One day of rest when needed can prevent several days lost should you fall ill because you ignored your own health."

He let Edward go when the other said nothing at first and then gritted out, "Fine."

"Thank you Edward," he replied.

His gratitude was brushed off with, "Whatever. How about dinner then, I'm hungry."

"A common occurrence I'm sure," he was punched in the arm playfully for that and just like that their tense exchange of words was left alone so that they could move on to other matters. Now was the opportunity to follow through with Riza's advice so he asked, "Anything in particular you want?"

"Burgers, I haven't had 'em in a while."

He chuckled and made his way to the front door making his welcome houseguest realizing they were going out. As he put his jacket back on and slipped into his shoes he said, "Ah, fast, greasy, unhealthy food, delightful," causing the other to laugh and say obstinately, "Well, you asked what I wanted so that's what you get."

He was not expecting an immediate agreeance to dinner and he was truly hoping that this was more than dinner between friends to his younger 'date' as if he wanted it to be. As the other chose a booth close to the windows without being in direct line of fire, he was blessed with that rare genuine smile that made him forget about what he hoped this was to focus on their time together.

He would have asked about the other guests at the house and their currently being absent from the house but thought nothing of it when the silence was broken bringing his attention back to the blond supernova before him. An average but kind looking young man took their orders for drinks and returned with said drinks to take their order before Ed started a real conversation other than debating over the menu.

"Question, what are we doing?"

"Having dinner I wager."

"Don't be sarcastic, I'm seriously asking here," Ed replied seriously.

"To what context does your question pertain to?"

Ed growled takes a drink after they arrive before which he gave him the silent treatment until their waiter walks away. He glares at him and looks nervous for a moment before he asks, "Are we having dinner as friends, comrades, or something else?"

"Which would you prefer?"

"No asshole, you first. I took the first leap twice already. Your turn to pay up by answering my question."

"Very well then," feeling oddly vulnerable under that unrelenting gaze and even a little nervous which was unsettling in itself given his experience in this he takes a deep breath. Honesty is all that comes to mind as a reply even though he is truly comes to mind as a reply even though he is truly terrified he is taking a huge risk given what he knows will be no simple tryst should he pursue this. But then again Ed was also taking just as many risks, more so considering their age difference and how this could possibly ruin any chance the other had of future relationships if it somehow ended badly between them, "Something more is my honest answer," he said feeling guilty but finishing his answer, "though I will understand if you do not-"

Ed's expression made him pause as it went from defensive and guarded to that of that brilliant smile again. At that moment, he no longer felt as though he had made a mistake in being honest. This young man had given pause to his words and had taken over his thoughts since his return.

"Good, I mean great. That is good because that's what I was hoping for. So, yeah," the other trailed off blushing but not looking away until their waiter arrived to ask them if they were ready to order. Ed of course ordered his burger and fries while Mustang decided on something a little less unhealthy, a plate of pork chops with mashed potatoes and gravy. Ed smirked at his choice of food but didn't comment instead taking a drink of his soda.

He was fighting the urge to grin triumphantly from the others words. Perhaps it is a good idea to listen to the advice of others occasionally after all. He should really know that already considering the number of times Hues had removed the blinders from his sight on many occasions, his mother had as well throughout his teenage years. In fact, his own mom had told him to take a chance with Edward before he lost the opportunity to have something worth holding onto and fighting for. This was a start and a chance for them to have something that truly terrified him but for that smile to be directed at him he already knew it was more than worth it.

"So what did those two talk to you about," Ed said reminding him that the house was now very vacant of said house quests. The friends from Xinghan had decided to stay with Alphonse, Winry, and Anna to help them celebrate the purchase of the studio apartment combination of where Winry planned to open up her automail shop. The name 'Rockbell' was well known thanks to the flourishing business revenue Mrs. Elric had accumulated over the last few years working in Resembool and Rush Valley. He had helped the couple decide on a school for their daughter and had a promise to keep regarding making certain Ed was protected and well taken care of so that when all this was said and done with they could throw a welcome home party for the eldest Elric at their new home.

Thinking through all of that he nearly forgot he was asked a question and answered quickly, "I'm sorry. We spoke about you of course; I believe they wanted to be certain I was fully aware of my idiocy with you."

Laughter, rich and full, throaty and happy and greatly missed met his words that did make him grin. He felt warmth of happiness and calm like the first time they did this cast around him; to have this feeling all the time would be amazingly dreamlike. They sat in mutual silence until their food arrived taking occasional drinks that had to be refilled by the time their food arrived before he thought of something to talk about.

"Do the Xingnese restaurants compare well to the actual food?"

"Only certain ones," Ed asked after swallowing bite from his burger, "I've only been to a few with everything going on."

"What about the liquor?"

That laughter again, a bite and a drink later Ed replied, "You would ask that. Let me tell you that as hard as everyone works there, they party twice as hard. Wears you out until you get used to it," he offered as though he was giving advice for someone who wished to travel to the country. He followed the blond haired young man's example and started in on his dinner then took a drink after a while to continue their conversation.

"That would make the Emperor the odd one out from what I have heard of the young man."

"Ha," Ed barked with laughing agreement, "yeah, that lazy shit. He was always partying when I saw him. But he does work I guess since the place has changed a lot in the last couple of years according to the people."

"Indeed it has as Princess Mai has been sure to inform our government."

"Yeah," they continued to eat finishing over half of their meal before the conversation was picked up once more, "Ling was jealous of you by the way. It took him forever to convince me to stay in his part of the palace."

He didn't know why Ed was telling him this but he laughed at the knowledge because of the conversational way Edward told him and the smirk on the other's face from his words. He nodded and took a drink before stating, "I did notice."

"Oh I know you did bastard, you were very smug about it," the grin conveyed the blonde-haired person before him was pleased about it, "Serves the bastard right. I told him I didn't want a relationship with him."

He guessed he should feel disappointed that Ed was pleased to make his ex-love jealous but he found that he wasn't. Now, however, that they had established that they both want wanted more than friendship and possibly a relationship he would truly burn the young Emperor to a crisp should he 'molest' Edward awake again.

"Oh no you don't asshole, I know that look. Don't go getting possessive right off the bat," Ed said with a serious look on his face while he pointed a previously unused dinner knife at him in a threatening manner. The younger set the utensil down so he could finish what was left of his burger and fries and wash it down with a healthy swallow of his soda as though his words and gesture were more than enough to get the message across.

He feigned innocence, "Whatever do you mean," saying the words smoothly enough to convince a novice to his way with words. His guise only lasted a short while as the smirk on his face came across his features. He did wish that he could read Edward as easily as the other seemed capable of reading him.

"Don't play dumb with me, I know better," the other commented.

"I was doing nor saying anything."

"You were thinking it you git," Edward proceeded to give him the silent treatment motioning him to finish his own dinner which he did within a polite frame of time so as not to 'stuff his face' as the saying went. He called the waiter to their table once they were both finished ignoring Ed's argument to comment after they stepped outside, "I invited you so it was my turn to pay."

"Fine, I'll give you that much," hands in his pockets Ed kicked a pebble down the sidewalk as they walked side by side. He looked pensive and Mustang worried the carefree, easy, happy mood was lost when the other turned to him making him stop abruptly. He was met with an almost pleading expression, "Can we go to the park, I'm in no hurry to be cooped up in the house with everyone else right now."

"I happen to feel the same way," he admitted, even though they no longer had their foreign quests the house was still full of their 'watch dogs' that were assigned to them by General Holigan and other higher ups. Ed's co-worker Lieutenant Lee Felohn and his own team member Falman who could care less about what it was they were doing were still shadowing them. Hawkeye was the one to work out everyone's schedule for around the clock watch and security so he was more than certain she had changed things around so these two would be on watch tonight almost as though she had planned to find a way to keep him in the office so late he was unable to go grocery shopping and so had to go out to dinner instead.

"Cool, let's go then," Ed replied with a grin pulling him out of his few seconds worth of thought. Mustang truly was at a loss to what brought about such a sudden change in Edward's attitude. While he should question it he really did not have the luxury with Ed walking briskly ahead of him. He supposed he should simply count his blessings. When he caught up to his date he asked, "Why the park?"

"Why'd you ask me to dinner?"

"Ah, is that what this is about?"

"Yes and no," Ed admitted and looked away from him to walk towards a bench once they had gone a ways into the park. There was a background of trees behind the bench he chose to sit down upon. Not really, certain if he would receive more explanation he made his way to the aforementioned bench and sat down beside the other regardless.

"So, why did you? I've been nothing but a brat and keep throwing you mixed signals, so why pursue anything with someone so obviously unstable?"

"You are very worth all the trouble and I was hopeful your earlier interest had not decimated," he answered with honesty not allowing himself to over-analyze his words and carried on, "I have made mistakes in this that are far more unforgivable than you believe you have made between us."

"I was expecting _you_ to fuck up, being a nosy asshole and all that," Ed said with a smirk and a playful shove of his shoulder against his.

"I'm glad to hear you have such faith in me," he replied in equal jest that made Ed chuckle at his words and prompted him to continue, "I have not had any right to pressure you into telling me anything at all."

"You're damn right about that. I had enough of that coming from everyone else. I was foolishly expecting you to understand," the other admitted.

He nodded guiltily in agreement, he should have understood considering his own past and the horror's that lay there. Now he did but it was too late to undo what he had brought upon Edward or to undo the justifiable disappointment the young man beside him felt towards him.

"You know, I'm not as oblivious as everyone thinks, so I know you've figured out all this with me by now. I know I'm an idiot to think that whatever everyone says is different from how they feel or what they really think . . . But, it's still hard to tune out the other words I've heard," Ed's tone of voice was resigned and quieter by the time he finished what he had to say.

Watching the other and seeing the way Ed hung his head and how beaten down he looked made him angry, not with the young man but with those who had forced Edward into feeling the way he did so he knew saying, "From those bastards in Rousia," that it was only going to make Edward pull away even more.

A sullen, ashamed, and dark look overcame the other giving him the appearance of a tormented soldier much older than his actual age. His hand, his entire being longed to reach out and pull the younger man from that darkness but slowly a new fire burned in those golden eyes. Defiance, anger, determination, all there and a welcome difference.

"Yes, those, dead as they are it pisses me off that I still can't really escape that place. I'd beat the shit out of them if I had the chance," Ed growled.

"I would not settle for less than burning them slowly to a crisp."

Ed looked at him humbled but reprimanded him nonetheless, "We've had that talk, and cold blooded murder with the motivation of revenge is not the way to go."

"Burning them would not be enough to see justice bear down on them and death was too merciful," he replied heatedly and with honest vehemence.

"As flattering as both you and that lazy Emperor are when you act all possessive and vengeful on my behalf no one-"

"Has the right to end another's life," he finished remembering Edward's words very well from that hell hunt he had taken upon himself on Maes' murderer.

"Unless in self defense, or in the defense of another's life."

"And what about the defense of your life," he countered.

"Not helpless," Ed replied with a cocky grin but Mustang could see the shame beneath the surface and felt humbled, helpless, and angry with himself for being unable to prevent Ed from ever feeling that shame.

"Edward-"

"Don't, not your fault, it was her fault," he answered.

"Her fault?" It took him a moment to realize that the conversation Edward had with Breda had triggered the memories from what led to the young man's capture and imprisonment in that country. Through that, Breda had also found evidence that there was a large chance that the very same woman that they had yet to find had planned everything long before any of them were even aware of her existence let alone the danger she presented.

Ed nodded and reminded him of what they had found out, "She was there at the hospital, she instigated all this shit-it was her in all her psychotic glory that landed me in that hellish country."

"Why would those in that country hold such contempt-?"

"Don't tell me you didn't read up on the place once you figured out that's where I was. I know better and besides I know you listened in on the conversations between me and Ling as well as me and Al concerning the history of that country," his expression said that he would not believe him if he said otherwise.

"How were you not-"

"Killed for being an alchemist?" Ed finished nonchalantly and dismissively as though he had thought of that constantly, was asked constantly, or perhaps hated the reason why as though he'd rather . . . he couldn't finish the thought because of what it meant and how much it hurt to even conceive of never seeing Edward again.

"That bitch told them I was her descendant and there is one law they refused to break while she still lives . . . killing of the royal bloodline . . . I never got it before, why they kept saying I was fortunate to be an illegitimate child of the love of the prince's or some shit."

"That can't be true though, your parents-"

"Yeah, I know, but I had no idea what they were talking about then so . . . "

"Regardless, I speak for everyone when I say I am grateful you returned to us alive."

"Yeah," Ed replied then shifted uncomfortably and looked up at what could be seen of the sky. The lights of the lamps took away the natural glow of Ed's skin while the pale light of the moon as he rose to and stepped further under that light made the other seem ethereal. It was entrancing and made him feel that unworthiness and vulnerability by how much he truly did want the other.

Time, Ed needed time, which meant keeping himself and his libido under control and doing nothing unless initiated by the blond alchemist. Rising to his feet, he was stopped in his only a few paces away when the other turned to face him. The expression was calm in an unmistakably happy way, almost as though his presence was enough to grant his companion that moment of peace he needed. Did Ed always leap into every endeavor with everything he had?

"I'm surprised you know how to listen, at least to me."

"I always listen even when you are a stubborn, hard headed, foul mouthed, brat," he replied with a smirk that earned him a half-hearted glared that was followed by a smirk.

"Arrogant, smug, bastard," Ed countered, "Guess we should head back huh?"

"Perhaps, it is rather late now. Hawkeye is bound to send a search party soon."

That laughter from before that warmed him all the way through and made his stomach twist itself in knots and then, "No kidding, but being paranoid is her job and we still have watch dogs' close by. But you can be pretty careless."

"Says the alchemist known for leveling entire towns on a regular basis."

"Coming from a womanizing pyromaniac," Ed counted with a laugh.

"Ah, I am fairly certain my womanizing days are over considering . . ." he allowed his words to trail off and wasn't disappointed by the bait he had left for Edward.

Instead of an immediate agreeableness to his words he was countered with a look, a cocky grin that reminded him of great deal of the trouble making teenager who used to scowl, cuss, and yell at him on the other side of his desk. Granted that Edward was capable of such feats now it did make him feel as though this was a bittersweet moment. Bitter because he could not help but to feel as though he did not deserve the other because of their age difference and the demons he had hidden in his metaphorical closet.

"Like I actually believe you're womanizing days are over," the other said to break the brief moment of silence, "Besides, I know you're secret behind the womanizing."

He raised an eyebrow as he looked to the other whom he was now walking beside down the sidewalk outside of the park, "Oh, what secret?"

"Madame Christmas and her daughters and adopted son," Ed said cheekily.

"Ah, now you know all," he answered with a chuckle to accompany Ed's cocky grin.

"Pray tell how you came across such incriminating information."

"I've known for year's old man," Ed teased, "I also met your mom a few times here and there. Moreover, General Armstrong filled in the blanks. She says you're still a womanizing, slimy, sneaky, bastard among other things."

"That woman needs a man to tame her a bit," he commented with a grimace.

"She'll kill you if you ever say that to her face," that cocky grin was still in place easing the tense air of before until it was nearly nonexistent.

"This is why she has tried many times to kill me, I am quicker than I look," he ended with a smirk.

A bark of laughter, "Yeah I bet, hell I would run from her as well if I ever pissed her off," a pause to laugh as a thought came to him, "Did you hear about how she got the mansion?"

"Hmm, no, I'm aware it was a tossup between Olivia and Alex however."

Another laugh and that grin looked devilish again and was proving contagious from the constant exposure, "Al told me what really happened. She beat the living hell outta' Alex and literally threw him out."

He laughed, really laughed at the news more than capable of picturing the scenario, "My, what a frightening woman. Though, I would have immensely enjoyed seeing that in person."

"No shit, me too," the other commented while snickering. They were now facing his house. The lights were of course still on with the sentries inside the home. Turning to the other to be welcomed by that warm golden gaze he longed at the very least to steal a kiss to offer his gratitude and wordlessly convey how immensely he had enjoyed their evening together. This night had flown by in the younger man's presence and he wanted it to never end or to at least repeat endlessly.

"So," the other said while rocking back on his heels with his hands in his pockets, "guess we should say our good night's here huh?"

"If you wish, I would honestly admit that is safest to save you some integrity."

"Oh? Smooth talking me now huh?"

"Edward," he said without the added teasing tone, "this has been-"

"Great, who knew you weren't a complete bastard? How about a repeat, you know, we do the dinner thing again sometime," Ed's words were spoken quickly and with a blush dusting his cheeks conveying his nervousness.

"Yes," he agreed without any thought needed, "I wholeheartedly agree."

"Great, good, I was-"

"Edward," he stated to stop the other from ranting anymore.

"Uh, yeah," the blond before him said removing his hands from his pockets as though realizing before he had said so directly what is was he was going to say next.

"There is sometimes a kiss at the end of a date when it goes well, if I may?"

That earned him a real blush that was flattering and reminded him of the flustered Edward of very early that morning. He shut those thoughts away not wanting to picture Ed flushed and still in bed, half dressed or half-naked, however it was. He waited for the other to really look at him and raised a hand to cautiously brush those bangs back. When he was met with no resistance, he hooked his thumb under the younger man's chin to tilt his face up and held him in place.

When his lips finally, finally met Ed's he felt the other relax and exhale softly as if in relief and acted on impulse winding his other arm around the slim waist to hold that warm body close to his while simultaneously licking his lips in the kiss. Ed reciprocated and encouraged his actions by wrapping his arms around his neck to hold him close with the same amount of possession and parted his lips to his silent question. He cheered silently at the acceptance while all that held back desire for this amazingly infuriating and humbling blond tried to engulf his control and crumble it.

The feel, scent, the way this strong, brave, selfless alchemist all but melted under his touch was intoxicating. That groan muffled by a now heady kiss as sucked that tongue into his mouth nearly undid him. His knees nearly buckled when the action was returned making him pull away to catch his breath. Opening his eyes he noticed that he had backed Ed into the archway above the front door but that neither of them had noticed or seemed to mind. Looking at the other, he knew he looked just as flushed as the other did from just a kiss.

When Ed licked his lips and smiled he wanted kiss him again and so much more than that. Instead, he released him and stepped back with a smile. He ran the back of his hand across the other's cheek and tucked a lose strand behind Ed's ear making Ed blink at him.

"Uh . . . goodnight then," Ed said sheepishly. When he made to turn and walk through the door, he grabbed his hand and pulled him back without any input from his brain. Kissing the other lightly and pulling away enough whisper softly in his ear, "I'm only letting you walk away from me because it is the gentlemen thing to do," he released him.

Ed ducked his head and gave a short nod looking too preoccupied to say more than, "Thanks, too much going on right now anyway right?"

Pulling back only to lean forward a bit and steal another quick kiss, he said, "Unless you genuinely want more right now."

"I do, but yeah, slow is um-" he paused to lick his lips and to gather his resolve apparently considering the flash of heat in his eyes, "slow is what I need right now," he nodded as though confirming that he had made the right decision to himself as well as the older man. Then he stepped back further so that they were no longer breathing in the other's scent.

"Then I can wait and will for however long you may need."

A nod and then Ed finally opened the door and stepped inside. He glanced back before closing the door and the older man decided it best to wait outside to calm down so that he didn't break his word. Taking in a few deep breaths and a some calming minutes under the night sky, he managed to regain his composure and his control. He knew this did not mean that everything was perfect between them or that their problems had disappeared. They both still had responsibilities but this was definitely a step in the right direction, he felt lighter and as though everything finally made sense once more.

He was fully aware as he hesitated at his threshold that Edward was still emotionally unstable which meant more than a few misunderstandings between them that would lead to arguments were likely to occur. Their personalities would only make them clash even more. However, after the moments, they had shared and that kiss and how they made him feel he knew everything, all the difficulties, were more than worth it.

The remainder of the night was spent entertaining their guest which Ed threatened a handful of times of castrating when it came to a particular guest. Needless to say the night was light hearted and a welcome change and ended with a certain Emperor of Xing sleeping in a room that Ed had transmuted shut much to his own amusement and the added promise that they were going to harass Al tomorrow morning if he had to drag the idiot to his brother's doorstep to accomplish the task.

TBC

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_Author's Note: Again, sincerest apologies for the lateness of updates. I have and will be no means stop working on these stories even should time give the impression otherwise. Thanks for reading for those of you who still are and hopefully this is enjoyable even with the tardiness. ^^_


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